Meadow of the Midnight Sun
by HeartOfDarkess
Summary: EPOV. Edwards take on his out of control feelings when he takes Bella to his meadow for the first time, and the story beyond. Romance ensues as Bella and Edward become deeply involved. Canon. Midnight Sun continuation.
1. Chapter 1

**This story is dedicated to Totteacher...if it wasn't for you I'd have given up the ghost long ago! Please read her stories – Isle Esme is just terrific and I know that if you give this a read you will be itching for the next chapter and the next story! Her link is in my profile if you have trouble finding it.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns these characters, so no copyright infringement intended. But a girl can dream...**

EPOV

It was a day unlike any other. The day I feared the most, but ached for more than anything. The day I would finally show my true self to Bella, changing the course of my past, present and future. Of course, my feelings had already altered to such an extreme state that my former self was a mere whisper in the wind, and I was now unrecognisable to my family, and even to myself. I closed my eyes and pondered for a moment, realising the gravity of what this day would bring. Oh how I wished I could sleep so I could dream of her, as she dreamt of me! Images of her wondrous beauty danced through my mind, causing me to smile.

As I pondered, it seemed strange to me to even think of the word 'love'. That word had been bandied around so loosely within the minds of every hormonal teenager at Forks High School that their thoughts seemed to diminish and trivialise its meaning. I felt love to the depths that I had never dreamed, nor read about in any novel, and I had read my share on those endless, lonely nights. And even if she did not return my love, which I knew was more than probable, I would forever be altered in any case. Though I had the suspicion that she did have significant feelings for me, they could not compare with how I felt about her. My love for her was an all consuming, overpowering love that could, if I allowed it, crush her fragile body at the worst, or at the best release me from the bonds of a mere existence. I was more than ready for the next chapter of my life to unfold, just like the flowers of this special place.

I opened my eyes and my smile widened as I took stock of my familiar surrounds, pleased with the place I had chosen for this most important step.

As the sun rose and dappled through the breaks in the canopy above the fringe of the forest, I stood in the shadows next to the elk that lay still and unbreathing, and looked across the meadow, its warmth and light only superseded by the abundance of blooms that covered the expanse of it like a living, breathing carpet. As I listened to the soft trickle of the waterfall in the distance, I knew that it was the perfect place. My place. The place I wanted to share with Bella and to show her what she meant to me. And, of course, to reveal myself to her entirely, leaving nothing left unsaid between us.

That is, if I could prevent myself from killing her.

I cringed, remembering that first day in Biology, and how my world tilted on its axis within a split second of time. A mere blip on the radar. A heartbeat. And yet, everything about my world and my very existence was altered irrevocably within that one fragment of time. Memories of her intoxicating scent lingered on my tongue as I recalled that day. The day when she walked towards me and passed the heated air that blew relentlessly from the vent, her scent hitting me like a wrecking ball; coming at me from all angles. We were no longer two students hastily thrown together as lab partners in Biology. I was a predator and she was my prey. There was nothing other than that simple truth, and I remembered how much I hated her in that one slip of a moment. How foolish I was to have that reaction, for what I really felt was hatred for myself. Hatred for allowing a mere human to have such a profound effect on my very existence.

Still, to this day, I do not know how I managed to control myself enough not to kill every child in that room in order to have her. I remembered planning how I would silently and smoothly snap each innocent victim's neck while at the same time subduing Bella while she watched each one of her classmates die in a blur. She would not even have the time to blink, let alone scream for help. Then, I would taste of her, drinking every last drop of her blood that I would have searched to the ends of the earth to find, like a siren calling a sailor to his doom. My body shuddered at the memory and the possible dark consequences it conjured.

The monster, which had reared its ugly head more often than I would care to admit ever since I sat next to her on that fateful day, still lay there dormant, buried deep within me but still very much a looming threat. A threat to everything that was part of my existence. An existence which now revolved around one frail little human who by just being within close proximity to me, risked everything from her body to her soul. How selfish I was. How ridiculous she was to ever contemplate this. No matter what, however, I still welcomed it with fervour. After all, the selfish part of me still existed, and now more than ever seemed amplified, forever at the forefront of my every thought and action.

It was time. I reasoned that if I was to pursue this, I had to be alone with her without the monster winning. It was a challenge but a challenge I relished meeting head on, just like a controlled scientific experiment. Well, as controlled as I could endure. The alternative was just...well there was just no alternative. Now that I knew Bella existed, being alone and part of a world where she was not by my side was just not an option. The very concept of spending another day, let alone an eternity, without being wrapped up in her conversation, her warmth and her incredible scent was unthinkable.

Freshly sated with the blood of my kill, I ran all the way to her house as fast as my legs would go, hoping that the faster I ran, the deeper I would push down the monster within me. As I approached her house and slowed to a more human pace, I lightly knocked at the door, my face creased with the weight of the world bearing down on my shoulders.

Within less than a second, as if she were a vampire, she answered the door nearly wrenching it off its hinges, and sighed. I immediately felt better for being in her company as well, but the undercurrent of the monster still lay beneath the surface, ready to pounce at the first hint of weakness, as the sweet breath of her sigh hit me like a tidal wave.

I had to distract myself, to compose myself as I always had to, so I started with a simple greeting. "Good morning," I said forcing a chuckle as I carefully looked her up and down, the worry never entirely leaving my face. As she stood there in the doorway, her very presence heightening my senses, I noted everything about her. She was thoroughly mouth-watering in every imaginable way possible.

I must have given off an inappropriate impression, my stare probably looking somewhere between agony and amusement, either expression of course would cause her equal amounts of discomfort. I waited for the inevitable blush, its onslaught only heightening every sense further.

"What's wrong?" she questioned, her enticing pink cheeks making me take a step closer as she looked at her feet and her trousers, her actions wordlessly expressing that she had somehow forgotten to put her clothes on. Oh, dare I wish!

"We match," I informed her, changing my expression to a crooked smile. She wore blue faded jeans and a tan sweater, under which she wore a white shirt, identically matching my attire in colour. Of course it was not only our clothes that matched. We were kindred spirits, drawn together by unique circumstance, but connected just the same. Our bond had grown over these weeks and I knew that, as was predicted with Alice's vision, today could go either way. I was determined more than ever that this day would be the beginning of something deeper and everlasting between us, and not a fatal ending.

Bella laughed, though I detected a hint of nervousness in her laughter. I had never been required to read someone's body language so closely, as their thoughts always gave me clarity of emotion. I realised I was going to need much more practice save me going insane from being unable to read Bella's thoughts. She was a walking conundrum.

I walked to the truck, watching her lock the front door and before I nearly made the error of approaching the drivers' side, I remembered where I was meant to be on this trip. As I diverted and stood on the passengers' side, she said smugly, "Remember, we had a deal?" She got in, leant over and unlocked the door, the snapping and crumbling noise of the mechanism alerting me that it was close to rusting off. I climbed in and slid over the bench seat, closing the distance between us as her scent permeated the small confined space as we shut our doors in unison. I held my breath, taking in a little of her at a time, trying but failing to desensitise myself to her glorious smell.

Of course, I had allowed her to drive even though the trip would take five times as long. This was a ploy to allay suspicion on the part of her father. If he returned to see Bella missing, but with her truck still in the driveway, nothing would stop him from outsourcing every available officer and FBI agent at his disposal in search of her. This thought gave me an uneasy sense of comfort.

Bella started the truck, the engine not so much purring but spluttering to life. I noted that the truck needed new spark plugs and a possible oil change as I caught the scent of the exhaust fumes in my shallow breaths. I would have to get Rosalie to make a special trip into town one night, to test her mechanical prowess on this dinosaur.

"Where to?" she asked meekly, a little embarrassed as to the truck's precarious condition.

The image of that truck wheezing up the one-o-one made me smile and say, "Put your seatbelt on – I'm nervous already!"

She glanced at me with a look of indignation, forever protective of the piece of junk that was her pride and joy. I likened it to a lioness defending her territory to the bitter end, a thing I had witnessed firsthand on more than one hunting trip.

"Where to?" she repeated, trying to ignore my humour as she clicked her seatbelt into place. I was pleased, though a little surprised that she complied with my request. If she did in fact have an accident in this truck, it would be highly unlikely that the Jaws of Life would be necessary to rescue her. I laughed silently, my shoulders shuddering slightly at the very image of a truck splintering to pieces with rust on the slightest of impacts.

As we drove from her house, I stared into the microscopic pits and divots in the windshield, willing for there to be a way that she would come out of this alive. We were finally embarking on a journey that had two very differing outcomes as a possibility, and my smile quickly faded as I made this realisation. I had everything invested in this one day. Failure, in my mind, was not an option. The monster mocked me as I turned to take in her features and continued to speak.

"Take the one-o-one north," I instructed as I gazed at her, unable to escape her delicious scent, even though my panting breaths were at their most shallow. She seemed incredibly distracted, as if she was somehow aware of my struggles. This, frustratingly so, only caused her to drive the truck well below its very limited speed capacity. Was this woman trying to torture me further? My gaze turned intense as I tried to wordlessly communicate my exasperation to her. Of course, I failed miserably. After all, she was not the one who was the mind reader. I was tempted to push her aside and drive, or at the very least plant my foot on the accelerator as she steered.

Trying to distract myself from the temptations that surrounded me no matter where I turned, I reached into my trouser pocket and fondled the bottle cap that I had taken as a souvenir on the very first day that we ate lunch together in the school cafeteria. It was my little secret token of our very first meal together, though no food was consumed. I hoped that one day I could give her a more meaningful token in return and that we would have many more important events that could be commemorated with many more wonderful gestures. I smiled inwardly at the very thought of that fantasy coming true.

I stared beyond the imperfections of the windshield, and took note of the sun's position, the clouds thankfully obscuring it. I knew what lay ahead of us to accomplish before the sun disappeared on this day and it occurred to me that at this pace, we may not make it to our destination in time. The mere thought of not getting her to the sun-drenched meadow in time made me somewhat anxious and I said, trying to seem carefree and a little humorous, "Were you planning on getting out of Forks before nightfall?"

Her face swept around, causing her flowing hair to do the same and, catching me off guard, her protective instincts kicked into gear once again as she replied, "This truck is old enough to be your car's grandfather – have some respect!" Her scent increased to an overpowering level with that motion. I stilled myself for the onslaught as I removed my clenched hand from my pocket, trying to stop myself from crushing my souvenir.

The time seemed to drag, the sputtering of the engine only proving me to be correct. I knew that it was due to my impatience and my need to escape the temptation that was uniquely Bella. Oh how I wished I could get her to pull over, pick her up in my arms and whisk her to our destination, but I needed to get a grip on myself and just allow things to unfold at her own pace. I did not, after all, want to push her beyond her limits, even though I was rapidly becoming closer to being beyond mine.

She opened her mouth to speak, but before she could utter another word, I interjected. I needed to keep on task, so I instructed her further, keeping things on a practical level. "Turn right on the one-ten." Her mouth was gaping but silent, as she complied and took the turn as I had requested.

"Now we drive until the pavement ends," I continued, smiling at her, realising that her brow had also creased in confusion. She had never ventured this far out of town and needed time to adjust to her surroundings, no doubt. I was relieved that we were nearing our destination, and in kind, her scent seemed to be dulling slightly, offering me some respite.

"And what's there, at the pavements end?" she questioned, looking as though she regretted those words being expelled from her thick, beautiful lips. She stared out the window intently, as my mind wandered to the thought of any part of my body touching those glorious pieces of flesh.

Realising that she was waiting for a reply, I reminded myself to focus on the task at hand and answered simply, "A trail."

Her regretful expression was quickly turning into a look of terror as she squeaked, "We're hiking?" She took her eyes off the road briefly and quickly looked at her feet, no doubt to check that her footwear would be accepting of the rocks and undulating terrain that her precarious sense of balance was about to be challenged to.

"Is that a problem?" I continued, staring at her questioningly, waiting for her to think of an excuse to back out of our plans. Of course, I had another, faster way of conveying us to the meadow, but I did not want to throw a first-hand demonstration of my speed and strength at her immediately, on top of the fact that I was a vampire. I needed to show myself to her at her pace, where she could absorb and cope with what I was conveying, little by little.

"No," she replied doubtfully. I knew I had to erase those doubts immediately, save her stopping the truck and trying to walk home.

"Don't worry, it's only five miles or so, and we're in no hurry," I explained, reasoning that five miles could be covered by me in a matter of a few minutes, not hours. That is, if you're a vampire. Of course, in human terms, and especially in Bella's case, five miles may as well have been fifty, and I immediately regretted telling her the distance we had to cover.

She sat there silently, the only noise breaking this silence being the elevated drumming of her heart and the popping noise of the truck. She looked as though she were deep in thought and was contemplating what to do next. I held my breath in anticipation, but I could stand it no longer.

"What are you thinking?" I asked, the air left I held being entirely expelled in my exasperation, my patience worn to the bone.

She replied, almost too casually, lacking the curiosity that I knew she was capable of, "Just wondering where we're going."

I knew she was wondering much more than she let on, but I needed to get her to that meadow more than I needed anything else in the entire universe, so I pressed on relentlessly.

I replied, just as casually, "It's a place I like to go when the weather is nice." I immediately glanced out the window and took note of the sun breaking through the thinning clouds, relieved that the surrounding trees kept the path we travelled in shadow, and hoped that we would be in the privacy and seclusion of the forest before the sun had the chance to hit the window of the truck.

"Charlie said it would be warm today," she said, a smile briefly touching her lips as the realisation of our excursion piqued her interest. This was a good sign. Then it occurred to me that Charlie's knowledge of our excursion would further solidify my determination to bring Bella home safely.

"And did you tell Charlie what you were up to?" I questioned, hoping that her answer would give me no alternative but to return her safely.

"Nope," she replied awkwardly and too quickly to be a lie. This was not good. But, then I thought of Jessica. Jessica, whose impure thoughts of me over the time I had been at Forks High School were at the very least blush-worthy, but at the very most downright intolerable in their vulgarity. Who would have thought that I would need to rely on her to be my insurance policy?

"But Jessica thinks we're going to Seattle together?" I said, unable to suppress my relief and joy.

That relief was to be short-lived.

"No," she said truthfully. "I told her you cancelled on me, which is true," she confirmed, giving me a look that forced me to expect no less of her. Ah my Bella. Honest as the day is long. I so wished that in this instance she would have lied a little – at least to Jessica. Anger at the precarious position that this situation now put her in began to well up from the pit of my stomach. It was as if she had a death wish – cutting herself off from all reasonable excuse as to her disappearance. Was she TRYING to fate herself to be on the side of every milk carton in the Washington State area?

"So no-one knows you're here with me?" I stuttered as my eyes narrowed, trying to repress the real anger that welled up and threatened to overtake me completely.

She did not take me or this situation seriously. Obviously. Otherwise she would not have orchestrated this scenario. "That depends...I assume you told Alice," she reasoned with futility, her statement being entirely irrelevant. Alice knowing was not going to save her life. Alice knowing about what I was up to only served to inform one other vampire of this situation, which would in no way improve Bella's chances of being brought home in one piece.

My teeth clenched together as I tried to keep my wits and snapped, "That's very helpful Bella."

The anger and sarcasm dripped from my lips with every word I spoke, to no avail. Instead, she stared at me blankly, as if refusing to listen to and absorb what I was trying to tell her. As if somehow, if she ignored it, it would go away. I obviously needed to make my point without being subtle.

"Are you so depressed by Forks that it's made you suicidal?" I shrieked, the tone in my voice heightened to press my extremely real and very serious point.

Then, as Bella always did, she put the safety and well-being of others before herself. "You said it might cause trouble for you...us being together publicly." There it was. Bella, bringing up something I had said as a way of justifying this ridiculous situation, the quote now being put into a context that suited her selfless argument.

The anger and frustration continued to rise as I realised, in no uncertain terms, her determination to protect me, the most undeserving of all beings. "So, you're worried about the trouble it might cause ME – if you don't come home?" The sarcasm that I had used previously reared up once again, rejoining the anger.

She nodded silently as she kept her eyes on the road. I was ready to shake her to try to make her realise her dire situation and here she was, casually behaving as if on a pleasant Sunday outing.

"Are you insane, woman? Are you bereft of your faculties? Do I have to arrange for Carlisle to commit you?" I muttered to myself, saying the words so quietly that her human hearing would not be able to decipher them. Bella somehow knew not to ask me to reveal what I had just said.

We drove the rest of the trip in silence, my infuriation unhindered and raw. I exhaled, trying to expel the demons within. Bella drove on, never making eye contact with me as she sensed my unbridled rage.

Finally, when I feared I could stand it no more, the road ended. Before I could utter a word, Bella had pulled over and parked, stepping out of the car silently. I sat still in the cab for a brief moment as I watched her scan the immediate area around her and glance skyward. Then, she did something unexpected. She removed her sweater and as she pulled the lucky item of clothing over her beautiful face, I felt a tingling sensation hum through my body that I had not yet experienced. I watched voyeuristically as she pulled her hair from the confines of the sweater and looped it around her curvaceous waist, revealing her white sleeveless shirt underneath which showed off her supple, soft arms. This was more than I could withstand. She always had a way of turning my emotions on their head, and she had once again, succeeded without even realising.

Without asking my body of it, I the removed my sweater, mirroring Bella's own actions and placed it on the seat next to me. I opened the door, stepped out in a blur and had slammed it shut with such force that pieces of rust fell into the door cavity. I was immediately by her side, following her gaze, though was relieved that she had not seen the speed with which I had completed all of these tasks. I feared that if I looked at her now, that we would not proceed on our journey.

I rolled up my already short sleeves, ready for the job at hand and said, "This way," I glanced over my shoulder at her, fearful to face her entirely save I grab her and take her into my arms. I walked away slowly towards the thick brush, the pull of Bella trying to wrench me back towards her.

"The trail?" she asked innocently, her velvety voice bringing me undone, even though panic lay barely underneath it. I felt her hurriedly approach me and I walked onwards, fearing that same pull once again. I reminded myself of the task at hand, and how important it was to get her to the meadow in time.

"I said there was a trail at the end of the road, not that we were taking it," I replied stiffly as I continued to walk on a few paces in front of her.

"No trail?" she asked with a desperate undertone in her voice, her heartbeat increasing in pace as she struggled to keep up with mine. This was obviously worrying her greatly, and her worry was a welcome distraction from how I was feeling at this moment. Of course we had to take a short cut if we were to make it there on time at her, shall we say, dubious human pace. My feelings were so at war with themselves that I laughed internally.

"I won't let you get lost," I answered mockingly as I turned to her and smiled, as if I would ever be able to lose her with my vampiric senses to aid my quest. She seemed to take a backward step, ever so slightly, as she appeared to somehow be shocked by the sight of me. I small gasp escaped her pert lips at the same time, confusing me. Was she finally beginning to grasp the gravity of this situation? Why was she staring at me that way? Was she fearful? Her eyes turned to a look of despair, but also deepened somehow. I was really in need of being able to read her mind now, more than ever. I decided to give Bella one final opportunity to back out of this journey, perhaps by doing so would convey her feelings to me.

"Do you want to go home?" I asked quietly, the pain of this possible missed opportunity etched on my face.

Her eyes softened, but still conveyed pain. "No," she whispered as she took two steps forward, closing in the gap between us. I had to find out what she was thinking.

"What's wrong?" I queried, nearly frightened of her possible answer.

"I'm not a good hiker," she answered unexpectedly. I was relieved to find that we were back on the subject of the task at hand, and that somehow we had progressed beyond the anger and frustration from our journey in the truck. "You'll have to be patient," she added. I knew she would request patience of me, however it was not something I possessed in great abundance. I suspected it was a residual trait from my human days, which seemed to intensify once I had been changed by Carlisle.

Sensing her doubt and her concern of the fact she may slow me down, I tried to reassure her. "I can be patient – if I make a great effort," I said honestly. It was not good practice to give her the impression of me being anything than what I was, every flaw laid bare. I wanted nothing less than an honest relationship, as we had many other hurdles to overcome that were not of normal circumstance. I smiled at her, trying to reinforce what I had said, but her expression was far from happy.

I stared at her dejected face closely, my reassuring statement falling flat. This did not bode well for what I had in store for Bella. "I will take you home," I stated unwillingly, not wanting to leave things as they were, unfinished and incomplete. If there was no way of us progressing things on this day, who is to say that they will ever progress beyond it?

Then her lips tightened, a look of determination etched in her features. "If you want me to hike five miles by sundown, you'd better start leading the way," she said pointedly.

I felt my brows crease as I tried to discern her emotions, and once again I was lost. Oh, how I wanted more than anything to read that mind of hers! After a moment of contemplation and frustration brought on by her unreadable body language, I decided that this was getting me nowhere.

I turned and walked silently onwards, hoping that she would naturally follow without my provocation. She did, to my relief. I continued to take in the scents around me, the predator in me constantly monitoring the territory ahead. This hike was on fairly even ground for most of the way, and on the occasions that a fallen tree or boulder stood in Bella's path, I would instinctively hold her in support, either by taking her hand or propping her up by the elbow. Every time we touched, her heart rate would become uneven and erratic. I was unsure as to what this meant, as she was also a little breathless, I assumed, from the exertion of the hike.

Because of her uncertain reaction, my touch would linger on her skin for the minimal amount of time, while I fought the desire to never let her go. I knew that the feel of my skin must have been akin to touching a cold piece of stone, but the exact opposite of that reaction was occurring with me. Even the bony end of her elbow felt soft and silken smooth to the touch, the heat radiating from every tiny pore of her skin. I kept my distance unless she required my help. I needed her heart to remain unflustered, though at the same time I desired more than anything to be responsible for her heart to react in this way.

We walked on silently, with her gaze averted from me except for every now and again, where I would catch her staring at me in my peripheral line of vision, a look of confusion on her face as much as I am sure it was on mine. With each step I tried to decipher her emotional tenor. I decided, finally, to give up on trying to read the unreadable and as I began to relax in her company, I thought about a few questions that I had yet to ask her on my last few days of interrogation. Distracting myself in this way would hopefully help with my lack of patience, and would also serve to bring her out of her unusual mood.

"So, what did you do to celebrate your last birthday?" I asked as I touched her elbow, guiding her over a fallen tree log. Her heart picked up its pace as if she were nervous. Her already flushed cheeks seemed to increase in colour at my question. I licked my lips, but luckily her averted eyes did not catch my indiscretion. I immediately released my hold on her, but this did nothing to slow her thudding heart.

"Um, I don't exactly like celebrating my birthday," she replied, suddenly embarrassed by her confession as the words floated from her lips. "My mom gave me some new clothes, but I left them back in Phoenix. They would have been pretty useless to wear here. Well, except for today."

I did not understand her answer. I thought that every human loved the attention, the adoration and the gifts that were associated with birthdays. Of course, birthdays were no longer celebrated within the Cullen household, and one seemed to blur into the other inconsequentially. And of course, there was the decision as to which birthday would be celebrated, the human one or the anniversary of one's change. We did not celebrate either, mainly because of Alice. Alice had no memory of her human life, nor her transformation. Darkness was the only vivid memory that she held in her mind. It would have been cruel and unfair for the family to celebrate an anniversary which Alice could never mark for herself. If Bella lived to see her eighteenth birthday, I made a note to myself that I would ensure that she would celebrate it with gusto. I wanted her to experience more in her life and for things to be enhanced in areas that I could help her with, to compensate for experiences that I knew she have to sacrifice if she chose to be with me. Of course, those celebrations would have to be between the two of us, as I did not want the possibility of upsetting Alice.

I pressed on with my next question, this time it would be harmless, yet informative. "Who was your favourite grade school teacher?"

"Miss Carter. I was lucky to have her for a few years. She was so kind and pretty much left me to my own devices," she answered without hesitation. I already knew how shy Bella was and how she shunned attention. A quiet, kindly teacher would have suited her requirements perfectly. I, on the other hand, vowed to shower her with more attention than she could stand. I hoped in my ever-still heart that she would allow me that honour beyond today.

We walked silently on to our goal and I decided to ask her one last question. "Bella, did you ever have any pets?" I asked of her innocently, not expecting her response of laughter.

"Pets?" she questioned as she looked at me, her sly smirk unable to be contained. I thought it was an innocent enough question. "Well, yes I guess you could say that," she replied further, tittering as she walked. "I mean if you count three identical fish in a row that I somehow managed to kill within days of each other qualifying as pets! Renee must have thought I was blind to think that the fish were one in the same, especially when I spied her flushing down the first one after sneaking in my room to replace it!"

I could not help but lose control at her humour, my bellowing laugh which echoed through the forest and reverberated back to us tenfold suddenly making her jump in surprise. Ah, yes, I had forgotten what it was like to let go with my voice, the volume of which she was not accustomed to.

After experiencing the gamut of Bella's emotions with our small conversations, and to prevent revealing further unique traits of my own, I decided that any further questions would not be a good idea at this juncture. Instead, I focused on getting us to our destination. Over what seemed to be a shorter time than I anticipated we were drawing near. The deep green of the canopy above was beginning to lighten ever so slightly, something that I had failed to notice when I ran to this place. The sun began to trickle through the small but ever widening cracks between the branches of the ancient trees, signalling we were close.

"Are we there yet?" she asked impatiently, just as a child sitting in the backseat of a car halfway through a long journey would.

"Nearly," I answered quickly, smiling at her playful change in mood. "Do you see the brightness ahead?" I asked, unsure as to the limitations of her human vision.

Bella squinted, concentrating directly in front of us, her frustration palpable. "Um, should I?" she questioned doubtfully, as if her vision were far worse than any other human in existence.

I smirked at her response, trying to keep the mood light, and said "Maybe it's a bit soon for YOUR eyes."

"Time for a visit to the optometrist," she muttered, a hint of a smile still across her features. This only served to make me smirk once again.

She continued to stare directly in front of her as we walked, and after a hundred yards or so she picked up her pace. I realised that she had finally noticed that the light had changed, and that she was aware that we had arrived. I allowed her to set the pace, checking that there was nothing on the ground that would trip her up or cause her to lose balance, but it was nothing but smooth ground underfoot.

I stood below the thickest part of the canopy and gazed at her, awestruck, as she stepped into the meadow, looking as if an angel had arrived in heaven, making it her own. I watched every nuance and movement of her body as Bella's curious eyes took in every part of the meadow from the budding array of colourful flowers swaying in the warm humid breeze, to the warm sunshine which now enveloped her body, making her red-brown hair light up like a slow burning flame. I was mesmerised as I watched her fill her lungs deeply with the aromas surrounding her.

Then, I started to think of my immediate situation. I had not yet planned how I would reveal myself to her and did not know quite where to begin. I knew that I had promised Bella I would reveal what I looked like in the sun, but now fear and doubt tore away at me. Would she accept what she saw, or would she run away screaming? How could she possibly care for a monster such as me? In the safety of the shade, apart from the rather unique colour of my eyes, I appeared somewhat human. I froze in my place, cautious as to what I should do next, the sudden urge to run nearly taking over.

Seemingly able to sense my fear and doubt, Bella turned suddenly, searching for me, her eyes filled with urgency. She finally fixed her deep brown eyes on me and they softened once she was assured that I was still there, standing like a coward within the safety of the shadows. I knew in that moment that I could never leave, and that I would have to go through with what I had promised, no matter the fear. She had overcome every fear that I knew must lay buried in her, and the least I could do was to overcome my fears in return.

Bella took a tenuous step back towards me, beckoning me with her hand, a smile that would win the heart of the devil breaking across her glorious face. As she took a step closer, I put up my hand in warning, trying to gain the courage within myself to follow through on what I was about to do. This made Bella hesitate and rock back onto her heels.

It was time. I took a deep breath, inhaling every scent that surrounded me, Bella's being the strongest, combined with the flowers of the meadow, the moss, the trees, earth, streaming water, the birds and everything else somehow giving me the courage to proceed. I stepped fluidly into the midday sunlight, and Bella gasped...


	2. Chapter 2

**This is the chapter where obviously Bella gets to see Edward in all of his glory (with clothes on in the sun anyway).**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. I just wish it every day!**

EPOV

She stared at me, frozen in her place, as her widened eyes slowly scanned my glistening body. The rainbow-like orbs that refracted from my exposed skin enveloped Bella's unmoving body, the colours increasing its effect, making her glitter in all her glory. I inhaled and waited, the beauty in her stillness sweeping me away for a moment.

I stood there motionless, holding my breath in anticipation of Bella's reaction, as vulnerable to her as a newborn child. I felt reborn, every sound and movement around me amplified in this one moment as this new chapter of my life began to unfold before me.

I watched for her reaction, noting every movement, every blink and every expression on her face, trying to decipher her feelings. She had not taken her eyes off me. Bella's expression was unfathomable, a combination of many differing emotions seemingly warring within her. She had not exhaled. Her eyes were unmoved and widened so very much that the whites dominated the deep brown that usually took pride of place there.

The silence was deafening. I did not know what to do. Fear and doubt began to pick away at my resolve. Was she going to run? If she did run would she even want my assistance to find her way back to the truck? Was she ever going to speak? Her face was rapidly losing its beautiful colour, giving way to pallor. I needed to think my way out of this situation without Bella collapsing from lack of oxygen. She needed to BREATHE. I closed my eyes briefly and inhaled further, trying to ensure that her scent did not distract me, in an attempt to remove any hint of my surrounds so that I could use my vampiric senses and think rationally.

Of course, as was expected, Bella was in shock. Her physical reaction, along with her heart told me this in no uncertain terms. Would the adrenalin ever stop coursing through her veins? Would her racing heart recover and stop thudding unevenly? I had no alternative but to pray that it would. I likened it to removing a bandage quickly, the initial shock painful but once removed, the healed wound underneath would be all that mattered. I hoped with all my existence that the unusual appearance of my skin would not be all that mattered, and that she could see past my physical flaw to my newly healed self, thanks to her being part of my life.

I decided that I needed to give her the opportunity to absorb this. I decided to defy every instinct within me to retreat back into the welcome comfort of the shadows. I decided to go against my deeply ingrained trait and try to muster infinite patience. After all, I had infinite time. Time to allow for her to adjust to this seemingly overwhelming, incredibly surreal situation. I had never wished for my impatient character flaw to be as non-existent as much as I did now.

The only alternative for this was to give up entirely on pursuing this any further, which was really not a viable option any longer. It was too late. Not only was it too late for the both of us, but it had to work if I wanted to protect the safety and happiness of my family. If this was to fail and Bella chose to reject me, I feared I would have to wrench them away from their comfortable and happy life here. There was just so much at stake. These thoughts nagged at me, but for Bella's sake I chose to remain calm, my expressionless exterior masking the internal battle bubbling just beneath the surface.

Less than ten seconds had passed. I stood there motionless, opening my eyes and looking down at her with forever unspent tears, trying to convey my sympathy of her situation. I realised that my appearance may have been even more daunting than was necessary as I stood well over a foot above her. Never taking my eyes off her, I moved away from her slowly and silently to the middle of the meadow and lay down in amongst the flowers, hoping that they would somehow camouflage the intensity of the glow that had sent her into this state. Just like a wild animal submitting to the dominant alpha, I rolled over on the damp earth in submission to my love. She stood there unmoved, never taking her now narrowing eyes off me as she struggled with the glare and the situation that surrounded her.

The initial shock, though still deeply ingrained within her brown eyes, seemed to be somewhat easing. She stood in her place as if trapped, her breathing recommencing in a rush at first, then evening out, as her lungs fought to absorb the extra oxygen that her body demanded. Then, the flush gradually began to return to her cheeks and her lips seemed to be regaining their pink hue. Her physical reactions pleased me, and I felt relief wash through my still body as I lay in amongst the fragrant flowers, my surrounds seemingly successful in performing their assigned task. Though the pace of her heart was still more rapid than was normal, it began to settle into its beautiful, hypnotic rhythm once again.

In further submission, I closed my eyes and waited for her. I wanted her to come to me of her own volition without my persuasive words getting in the way. I was after all, an expert in luring unassuming humans to me, but wanted Bella to do this of her own free will in her own time, knowing it was her that wanted to be with me and not because of my silken words of seduction.

Just as I did this, I heard her step forward slowly, as if her feet were wedged in thick clay, each step making her heart race higher. I lay still, waiting anxiously for her to come to me. I felt the pull to her once again. I had to fight every urge to meet her halfway, my patience worn thin.

After what seemed to be an eternity, I felt her presence as she silently stood above me, and the sensation of darkness as her body cast a shadow over mine. I wondered if she did that deliberately. Just as I wondered this, I felt her move quickly and sit down next to me, the light underneath my eyelids returning along with the warmth. I tried to suppress my smile, not wanting to interrupt the perfection of this moment. She was still here. She did not run away. I was in heaven!

With my eyes still closed, thoughts of her began to dance through my mind. The uniqueness and wonder of this woman was indescribable. I envisioned those thoughts, which began to turn into musical notes on a page and started to come to life in my mind and take hold of everything around me. My composition continued to form and change in my mind, each note making its unique presence known. Without realising it, I began to hum it out loud, though too soft for Bella to hear. What I really wanted to do was shout it from the rooftops.

As I felt the warmth radiate from Bella's nearness, an overwhelming sense of peace began to take over my body. Her heart was beginning to return to normal, and even though she had not spoken, words could not describe what I was feeling in this moment. Finally, the silence was broken.

"Edward, what were you just saying?" she questioned innocently, taking me by surprise once again. Of all the things to ask about first, it was about what I was composing! No questions about what had just happened, just a normal, everyday question that required a normal, everyday answer. What a confounding person she was!

"I'm just singing to myself," I replied lazily, all too casually, my eyes still closed as I continued to give structure to my composition. I pictured every key on my piano, my fingers rolling over them delicately but surely, as my composition for Bella began to take shape.

I felt the grass rustle beneath her as she adjusted her position. Then, unexpectedly, her soft, all too warm finger stroked the back of the cool hardness of my hand. It felt absolutely indescribable. The humming electricity, felt numerous times before today, had returned in force, and oh how I longed for more! I waited for her to pull away from the sensation, but surprisingly she did not. I needed to know what she was thinking, so I finally opened my butterscotch eyes, taking in her glorious face which seemed even more beautiful in light of her acceptance of me.

As I watched her, my face broke into a smile in response to her expression, my thoughts elevated into sheer bliss as I thought of her reaction. "I don't scare you?" I asked of her, my smile becoming playful, though I was sure my underlying curiosity was not lost on her.

"No more than usual," she replied, still stroking the back of my hand gently, the circular movements becoming more rapid and confident. Ah, this was ecstasy!

My smile widened so much that I bared my teeth at her. I hesitated and waited for her response. Instead of retreating, she inched ever closer to me, her entire hand now working its way up my forearm, caressing me in ways that I had never felt before. The heat was incredible, and this source of heat had nothing to do with the streaming midday sun. I felt her fingers begin to tremble, so I closed my eyes once again, encouraging her to continue.

"Do you mind?" she questioned. Do I mind? Do I mind? Was she insane?!

I kept my outward appearance sedate, though internally there was nothing sedate about me. "No," I answered softly, inhaling as I tried to relax further under her soothing touch. Though her scent surrounded me, the combination of other feelings that were at the forefront and the helpful spring breeze helped me push that feeling to the back of my mind. I needed to convey my feelings to her immediately, but without threat, as I craved the feelings that her touch elicited. I NEEDED her. "You have no idea how that feels," I said to her as I exhaled deeply. A thousand different possibilities ran through my mind in an instant, along with a thousand different ways to touch her.

With that statement, her trembling seemed to ease as she gained more confidence. Her hand extended over my forearm and travelled up to my bicep, which went taut under her fiery touch. Then she trailed her hand back down and touched the crease in my elbow, eliciting a strange, tingling sensation. Her other hand took mine, asking me to flip it over in submission. I was willing to give her anything she wanted in that moment, so I happily complied a little quicker than was humanly possible, my sudden movement startling her.

I briefly opened my eyes and murmured apologetically, "Sorry." I closed my eyes once again to make her feel at ease. "It's too easy to be myself with you," I added as she began to turn our clasped hands in varying directions, suddenly pulling them towards her. I had to keep control, so I opened my eyes to ensure that I did, whilst still allowing her to have my hand, so that she could feel somewhat in control of this potentially out of control situation.

She stared at my hand intensely as if she were trying to solve a puzzle, her eyes grazing over each facet. I knew how she felt. Things that Bella did were so unexpected up until and including today. But today, she exceeded my expectations, her surprising behaviour attaining a level that I thought humanly impossible. She was a mystery wrapped up inside a remarkable riddle.

"Tell me what you're thinking," I whispered intently. That statement would remain synonymous with me and would probably be on my gravestone if I were to die. Not that dying was an easy proposition. "It's still so strange for me, not knowing," I continued. I wanted to know everything about Bella more than anything, but her mind was one area that would remain hidden, impervious to my talents.

"You know, the rest of us feel that way all the time," she replied logically, still not telling me what she was thinking. Then again, if I were human, we would not be having this discussion. Regret ate away at me at the thought that we would never have a normal, human relationship. Ah, if I could only give her that gift!

"But you didn't tell me," I requested, once again asking her to divulge her thoughts.

She hesitated and then spoke. "I was wishing that I could know what you were thinking."

Of all the... and here I was, thinking I was being open and crystal clear!

"And?" I asked, wanting her to clarify further.

She stared down, unable to meet my eyes, as if she were going to be embarrassed by her confession. "I was wishing that you were real. And, I was wishing that I wasn't afraid." I ignored her first statement and focused on the second. Now, finally, we had arrived at the important subject of her fear. Took a while.

"I don't want you to be afraid," I murmured honestly, all the while feeling a slight sense of relief that she finally began to understand what I had been trying to convey to her from the day we met. Of course, I wished more than anything that she truly did not have anything to fear, but I needed to be honest with her without scaring her away. This knife's edge of a conundrum seemed to rear its ugly head on a regular basis, and would obviously continue to do so if we were to pursue anything beyond today.

Then, Bella surprised me yet again. "Well that's not the fear I meant, though it's something to think about," she said casually.

My jaw tightened in frustration. She was bringing me undone. Once again, she had thrown me for a loop and I briefly lost control, her scent arriving in time to push me, bringing me in closer as the breeze stilled. I suddenly half sat up and propped myself on my right arm, my left palm still holding hers, my face inches from hers in dominance. The electricity zinged with our closer proximity as I briefly lost myself in the depths of those eyes and the increased sensation. I needed her so much, yet I also needed to make Bella understand the gravity of her situation, which once again seemed lost on her.

"What are you afraid of, then?" I asked, not able to even contemplate what she could be more afraid of than the monster that sat right in front of her. Her eyes blinked rapidly, seemingly distracting her train of thought. This was what I had tried to avoid. My seductive voice calling to Bella, making her unavoidably submit, making her MINE. Then she did something so unexpected that if I had a heart it would have stopped. She moved in closer, her eyes fluttering closed as she did so. Her scent hit me like a battering ram, and along with the electricity, it was more than I could withstand. Before my mind could catch up, my instinct to flee took over.

In a frenzied blur, and before I realised where I was, I tore myself away from her and ran back to the safe haven of the shadows on the fringe of the meadow. I had lost control of the situation, and Bella had somehow managed to break through my stone cold, calm exterior. This was dangerous. I felt...vulnerable. I felt...elated. And I also felt...frightened. Frightened for what I may have done to her in a split second of weakness.

Bella sat there alone in the middle of the meadow, vulnerable, confused and in a state of shock. Her heart pounded, the heat of her elevated pulse calling to me once again. I was so ashamed in that moment, and angry with myself for allowing this situation to spiral out of control so quickly. Before I could speak, Bella opened her mouth and stammered in confusion, "I'm...sorry...Edward." Of course, she would blame herself for this situation. I did not.

I needed to gather myself and said weakly, "Just give me a moment." I was so cowardly. I had to rectify this situation without putting her at risk once again.

After all of ten seconds, during which time her scent seemed to dull, I slowly moved back into the sun. This time she did not move or gasp, to my pained relief. I cautiously sat down in the grass ten feet away from Bella and crossed my legs, never taking my eyes off her. This was a close as I was brave enough to get in this moment, save me killing her, or at the very least causing her to run.

I hated that I was weak. I hated that Bella had to go through this. This was not NORMAL. I hesitated as I tried to articulate my feelings without hurting hers. "I am so very sorry. Would you believe me if I said I was only human?" I excused lamely, trying to convey that I was far from perfect, and that my particular imperfections just happened to be life-threatening.

Bella nodded once, acknowledging my statement, but probably not understanding its hidden meaning. I tried to smile at her, but it came out all wrong – my smile mocking her. As she looked at me, her heart rate increased further, perhaps the potential danger finally hitting her. This was the opportunity that I needed to ram my argument home. Just as I was about to do this, the cursed wind shifted and her delicious scent invaded every part of my body once again. This time, my reaction was different. I felt the anger and frustration build within me. The constant presence of her scent would put her life at risk every day and though I knew that from the start, it seemed that Mother Nature herself was trying to counter every move I made. I needed to run, but my anger finally won out in the face of the elements that surrounded me, challenging me to fail.

"I'm the world's best predator, aren't I?" I screamed at the heavens. Then I turned my gaze to Bella and clenched my teeth. "Everything about me invites you in - my voice, my face, even my SMELL! As if I need any of that!" I yelled, my voice reverberating through the trees as I stood and made my point physically. I ran as fast as my legs would carry me, darting in and around the meadow, returning to my original place within a split second. "As if you could outrun me!" I exclaimed, my eyes burning with anger. I reached out and tore a two foot thick branch from the base of the nearest spruce, balancing it on my hand as if it were a twig, then throwing it against the base of another nearby tree, the thunderous noise echoing so loudly that it caused the earth to tremble and the birdlife to scatter. My anger somewhat released, I realised that I must be frightening her. I came to stand about two feet away from Bella. "As if you could fight me off," I murmured as I stood there, statue-like, the stress of the situation being too much to withstand. If I could cry tears of despair, they would be drowning the meadow in this moment.

I waited for her to run, but she had not moved from her position, sitting in amonst the beauty of the meadow. I did not understand this. Any other human would have fled long before now. Then a thought occurred to me. Perhaps if my unhindered anger would not scare Bella away, then maybe nothing would. I was finally liberated – having just revealed my every flaw to the fullest extent. But then, I wondered, at what cost? How could she want me now? How could she want to be with such a monster? How, in all honesty, could this work after all? I HATED the situation that I now found myself in.

My eyes met Bella as she sat before me, terrified. Still sensing her fear, I murmured, "Don't be afraid. I promise. I SWEAR not to hurt you." Bella remained there, frozen, surely trying to anticipate my next move. I tried my best not to frighten her any further and I needed more than anything to make this right. "Don't be afraid," I repeated hypnotically as I tentatively sat down next to her, wanting nothing to do with the monster that she now saw before her. I sat next to her and stared into those beautiful eyes. I waited for Bella to respond. She said nothing.

I swallowed thickly, the panic just beneath the surface. "Please forgive me," I urged, my voice speaking softly, evenly as I inched closer. "I CAN control myself. You just caught me off guard. But I'm on my best behaviour now," I explained, realising that if I wanted Bella in my life, I must never allow this to occur again.

Still, she did not speak. Had I finally lost her? Had she become so paralysed with fear that her legs did not have the ability to carry her away from here? Was that the only reason that she still remained?

Trying to offer her further factual words of comfort I added, "I'm not thirsty today, honestly." I winked at her, trying to convey amusement.

Bella laughed in response, albeit unconvincingly.

"Are you alright?" I asked of her gently, as I tentatively reached out and took her hand into mine. She gazed lovingly at my hand, then back to my face and began to trace those tiny circles on the back of my hand once again. In that moment I realised I had not lost her and perhaps this baptism of fire was what she needed. What I needed. What we both needed to understand the depth of our connection.

I smiled the smile of a released prisoner finally freed from years of torture and incarceration. The elation that I felt was indescribable. What had I done to deserve a gift such as Bella? She did not run away from me. She instead had embraced who I was with such ferocity that I respected her now more than ever. Bella Swan was the bravest, strongest person I had ever known among both mortal and immortal alike. She returned her glorious smile and I could not mask my unbridled elation.

I knew I needed to get things back on track, to enable our future to be planned. "So where were we, before I behaved so rudely?" I asked of her gently.

"I honestly can't remember," she replied, the sound of her sweet voice ambrosia to my ears.

"I think you were talking about why you were afraid, besides the obvious reason," I added, wanting more than anything to know the answer.

"Oh right," she replied without elaborating. What was this woman thinking NOW?

"Well?" I questioned, waiting for her to speak. The seconds ticked by, and she did not respond. My impatient nature began to rear its ugly head once again, as once again I craved an immediate response.

"How easily frustrated I am," I muttered, feeling as though my behaviour was that of a spoiled child.

With that comment, Bella seemed to take courage from me revealing my weakness, though she would not make eye contact with me, instead looking down at our joined hands as she spoke. "I was afraid, well, because for obvious reasons I can't STAY with you. And I'm afraid I'd like to stay with you much more than I should."

I had thought she did not have the capability of surprising me further on this day full of surprises, and yet she managed to achieve this once again. She wanted to stay with me. With me! However, I needed to let her know that her choice was not in her best interests. "Yes," I agreed. "That is something to be afraid of indeed."

Bella frowned in response. Things were not going to be easy. If I had chosen the path of least resistance and stayed away from her once I had left for Alaska I knew in my heart that this situation would not have occurred. I was a heel to make her feel this way, but in the same thought I knew that it was too late. For both of us.

"I should have left long ago," I said, sighing deeply. "I should leave now. But I don't know if I can," I elaborated selfishly.

Once again her gaze left mine as she stared down ashamedly at our intertwined hands. "I don't want you to leave," she mumbled under her breath.

"Which is exactly why I should. But don't worry. I'm essentially a selfish creature. I crave your company too much to do what I should," I said honestly, my selfishness being highlighted to the utmost.

"I'm glad," she replied meekly.

She was glad I was selfish?

"Don't be," I said brashly as I removed my hand from hers. As I spoke, Bella appeared to look dazed and confused. Obviously I needed to explain myself with further clarity once again.

"It's not only your company I crave! Never forget THAT. Never forget that I am more dangerous to you than I am to anyone else!"

Just then, I heard soft footfalls that were so low that I knew they were those of a vampire. My back straightened as I looked towards the forest and saw Alice standing in the thickness of the undergrowth, hidden from view just as her familiar scent crossed the expanse of the meadow and surrounded me.

_I think it's going to be fine now, Edward. You're over the worst. I just thought I'd drop by to let you know. That's my best friend there you know, so just remember to be nice or you will have me to answer to. _Alice winked and turned, abruptly disappearing into the thickets. I gasped as images of Bella flickered through my mind, Alice's prediction fading with her increasing distance. Her tinkling laugh echoed through the forest and finally disappeared as she headed away from our range of thought. In that moment, I was more relieved than I had been in these past hours, but also confused by what I had seen in Alice's mind. The pictures were disjointed and made no sense. But, asking Alice about that was for another time.

"I don't think I understand exactly what you mean – by that last part anyway," she said, seemingly deep in thought, just as I was.

I smiled at thought of the reassurances Alice had conveyed to me. I was on an emotional roller coaster, but I liked it, and hoped that perhaps I was nearing the end of my ride. I tried to answer her statement with an air of humour.

"How do I explain? And without frightening you again...hmmmm," I mused. I knew that there was nothing that I could do now to frighten her further. Not after what we had just endured. This comforted me to no end. I placed my hand confidently back into both of hers, their warmth radiating through to my bones.

"That's amazingly pleasant, the warmth," I confirmed, sighing lightly as I watched her gentle hands surround mine.

Though I was distracted by Bella's touch, I needed to focus on my explanation. I failed miserably at my first attempt. "You know how everyone enjoys different flavours? Some people like chocolate ice cream, others prefer strawberry?"

Bella nodded, though her eyes stared at me accusingly. I immediately regretted my words, backtracking on them with an apology. "Sorry about the food analogy. I couldn't think of another way to explain." She smiled and I returned her smile ruefully.

"You see, every person smells different, has a different essence. If you locked an alcoholic in a room full of stale beer, he'd gladly drink it. But he could resist, if he wished to, if he were a recovering alcoholic. Now let's say you placed in that room a glass of hundred year old brandy, the rarest, finest cognac – and filled the room with it's warm aroma – how do you think he would fare then?"

We sat silently, looking into each other's eyes, trying to read each other's thoughts. I did not quite think my statement had the impact and meaning I was searching for, as Bella did not answer.

"Maybe that's not the right comparison. Maybe it would be too easy to turn down the brandy. Perhaps I should have made the alcoholic a heroin addict instead." That was closer to the depth of need that I was trying to convey.

Bella looked at me and smiled wickedly, bringing me undone. "So what you're saying to me is that I'm your own brand of heroin?" she said, almost teasingly.

I could do nothing but smile at her statement. She was treating this situation so lightly, yet I appreciated her calmness over the fact that I just told her that I was addicted to her, and not in a healthy way. "Yes, you are EXACTLY my brand of heroin," I replied.

"Does that happen often?" she asked logically.

Does it happen often? Try never! Try searching for a hundred years without coming across this very thing! I stared into the forest, trying to think of a way to tell her the answer without regret, while at the same time listening for my sister.

"I spoke to my brothers about it." I still stared into the forest, not wanting to see her reaction to this quite distasteful subject. "To Jasper, every one of you is much the same. He's the most recent to join our family. It's a struggle for him to abstain at all. He hasn't had the time to grow sensitive to the differences in smells, in flavour." I took in her gaze, staring at her apologetically. We were back to the food analogy once again, which was too close to the truth to be comfortable.

"Sorry," I said, apologising out loud.

"I don't mind. Please don't worry about offending me or whichever. That's the way you think. I can understand, or I can try to at least. Just explain however you can." This woman deserved to be canonised.

I took a deep breath and stared skyward, praying that this would not upset her. "So Jasper wasn't sure if he'd come across someone as...appealing as you are to me. Which makes me think not. Emmett has been on the wagon longer, so to speak, and he understood what I meant. He says twice, for him, one stronger than the other."

"And for you?" she questioned curiosity burning in those soulful eyes.

"Never," I answered honestly. We stood there in silence as the uniqueness of our situation became abundantly clear.

"What did Emmett do?" she asked. That was the wrong question. My hand balled into a hard fist inside the softness of hers. I knew I needed to be honest, but to go this far? I could not look at her, the possible repercussions of following in Emmett's footsteps being too close to the truth.

"I guess I know," she finally said, answering her own question.

I looked at Bella once again, silently begging her to stop. I did not like where this conversation was headed.

"Even the strongest of us fall off the wagon, don't we?" I explained in a whisper, trying to justify Emmett's moments of weakness.

Of course, Bella misconstrued what I was trying to say. Her voice became acidic as she said, "What are you asking? My permission?" Then her voice became meek, her body retreating into itself slightly as she no doubt thought she'd said the wrong thing. "I mean, there's no hope then?" she questioned softly as her shoulders hunched.

"No, no!" I said in contrition. "Of course there's hope. I mean, of course I won't..." I stared at her intently, trying to convey my feelings. "It's different for us. Emmett...these were strangers he happened across. It was a long time ago, and he wasn't as...practiced, as careful as he is now." I was stumbling over my words as I spoke.

I watched her face as she pondered my statement. Her eyes were clear but seemed anxious.

"So if we'd met...oh in a dark alley or something..."

I cut her off before she had the chance to finish her sentence. I remembered all too clearly the fear, hatred and uncontrollable desire that I had to kill her that very first day. Though I wanted to protect her, I needed to make it clear just how close she was to becoming a distant memory. "It took everything I had not to jump up in that class full of children and..." In that moment, I had to look away, lacking the courage to say how much I wanted to kill her to her face. "When you walked past me, I could have ruined everything Carlisle had built for us, right then and there. If I hadn't been denying my thirst for the last, well, too many years, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself," I added ashamedly, fully admitting my weakness.

Now more than ever I needed to tell her my story, laying out my very soul to Bella. I needed more than anything for Bella to understand how things had come to be as they were. I confessed everything to her, from how I hated her and wanted to kill her on that first day to me trying to change my schedule that very same day, only to find Bella bombarding me with her scent within that tiny school office, risking Mrs Cope's tenuous life. A look of horror crossed Bella's faced when she realised that her presence on that day may have cost an innocent life. Of course, that horror was selfless, directed at another once again as it was in her nature to only care about the welfare of others and not her own.

I also told her about my self-imposed hiatus to Alaska. I deliberately left out the part about my past history with Tanya. I did not want to hurt Bella needlessly, even though my relationship with Tanya was innocent enough – on my part anyway. Tanya, over the decades, had tried to seduce me on more than one occasion, and though I was somewhat flattered by her advances, I was unable to return her feelings. Especially when her intentions were not always so honourable. Instead, I told her about how much being in Alaska made me see things more clearly, how the distance between us made me think more logically and how I had become so very homesick whilst there.

I told her how I felt weak by leaving. "Who were you, an insignificant little girl?" I said grinning widely at Bella conceitedly. "To chase me from the place I wanted to be?" So I came back..." I stared off into space, hoping that Alice had left during my long speech. I hoped she had gone for good – her continued interference and obsession with Bella was becoming tiresome.

Bella did not speak. I could see that her mind was ticking over, trying to take in everything I had confessed, all the while my eyes darting around the perimeter of the forest in search of my irritating sister.

I began to tell Bella about my challenges once I arrived home, and how in my arrogance, I refused to allow her to have any impact on my life whatsoever. I explained, cringing at every word, at how I had to make such circuitous efforts to read Bella's mind via the vulgar, vindictive mind of Jessica to gauge her reaction to me. I chose to leave out the details of Jessica's shallow nature, and how her thoughts of me made her jealous of Bella. I was sure that, in good time, Bella would see through Jessica and decide for herself the dubious nature of her character.

Then came the day of Bella's near-fatal car accident. That was the day I realised I could never harm her. After that day, everything shifted, like sands on the beach; each individual grain while insignificant by itself, could crush someone to death in number.

"Later I thought of a perfectly good excuse for why I acted at that moment – because if I hadn't saved you, if your blood had been spilled there in front of me, I don't think I could have stopped myself from exposing us for what we are. But, I only thought of that excuse later. At the time, all I could think was 'Not her.'"

I closed my eyes in that moment, the agony of my confessions overwhelming me. Bella still listened, though her expression was that of an eager pet, wanting to please without really knowing the reason. Forever faithful, no matter what. I hoped that she was finally embracing just how close I was to taking her life, but I was not entirely convinced.

"In the hospital?" she whispered faintly.

My eyes met hers with ferocity. "I was appalled. I couldn't believe I had put us in danger after all, put myself in your power – you of all people. As if I needed another motive to KILL you." We both flinched at the inference. "But it had the opposite effect," I continued quickly, trying to ease the tension that Bella now emitted. "I fought with Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper when they suggested that now was the time...the worst fight we've ever had. Carlisle sided with me, and Alice." I grimaced at the thought of Alice being so heavily involved with Bella. Not only had she embarked on a self-fulfilling prophecy once she had decided to be Bella's friend, her predictions had made me shudder in these past weeks, forever shifting as my decisions changed accordingly.

Then I confessed further. "All that next day I eavesdropped on the minds of everyone you spoke to, shocked that you kept your word. I didn't understand you at all. But I knew that I couldn't become more involved with you. I did my very best to stay as far from you as possible. And every day the perfume of your skin, your breath, your hair...it hit me as hard as the very first day."

I stared at her lovingly. "And for all that, I'd have fared better if I HAD exposed us all that first moment, than if now, here – with no witnesses and nothing to stop me – I were to hurt you."

"Why?" she asked abruptly.

"Isabella," I said sweetly, carefully as I ruffled her hair, its glint once again flame-like. Her scent wafted into the warm spring air as I briefly inhaled her, stopping myself short once again. "Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me," I said ashamedly as I looked down at the blooms that were now crushed under my body, crushed as easily as Bella's body could be with little effort on my part. "The thought of you, still, white, cold...to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretences...it would be unendurable."

Suddenly, a rush of breeze passed me from the south, bringing Alice's scent to me once again. I paused and stared into the trees, once again spotting Alice. I scowled at her, wordlessly willing her to leave us alone.

_Edward, stop thinking about these things – they're in the past. Focus on the positive Edward. On the FUTURE. For all our sakes. Please? Oh, and try to control yourself!_

Once again, images of Bella and I in the meadow flickered through my mind, and as Alice's prediction began to solidify, I could not believe what I was seeing. I saw myself...holding her so closely that I could hear her heartbeat as if it were a thunderous drum! I realised that had to bring myself to the here and now. I needed this new eventuality more than anything. I had to tell Bella that while all of the things I had told her until now posed a threat to her life at every turn, these things were now irrelevant. What mattered most was what I was about to say next.

My eyes burned into hers as I told her, "You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever."

She sat there silently, her confused eyes searching mine. She looked down to our hands once again, my eyes boring into her as I waited. I was out on a very precarious limb, and I needed her response, and needed it now.

Then, the next thing she said changed everything in instant. "You already know how I feel, of course. I'm here, which roughly translated, means that I would rather die than stay away from you." Her brows knit together, the concern on her face clear. Had she just said she loved me? Or was this just some high school girl crush that she was confessing to? I had not exactly told her I loved her in so many words, so I did so in an indirect way.

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb..." I murmured, waiting as I held my breath.

She responded immediately, her words confirmation of all that I could hope for, wish for, sleeplessly dream about. "What a stupid lamb," she responded with a sigh, knowing the idiocy of this situation, but still unable to avoid it. My heart soared. Though she had not said she loved me in so many words, I was happy to accept her words as being equally meaningful. And, somewhat truthful.

"What a sick masochistic lion," I stated, my thoughts scrambling as I stared into the forest, my mind racing as to the meaning of her declaration.

I wondered what would happen now that we had confessed, as I saw Alice disappear into the shadows once again, her laughter bell-like in its tone. With my new found knowledge, I pondered my next move...


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thank you once again for your kind reviews and words of encouragement – I'm glad someone out there likes my story! You have slowly but surely began to make me cave and write one more chapter for this. Totteacher – you know I can't thank you enough! My eyes are leaking onto the keyboard again.... **

**This chapter is hopefully going to be a little romantic folks!**

**Please keep on reviewing...I am amazed by the comments so far! 10 and counting! Woo-hoo!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of Stephenie Meyer's characters. Though it would be nice if I did! **

EPOV

I could not believe the chain of events that had led me here. Each event seemed to be interwoven into an intricate, definitive pattern of fate. A fate that even if I chose to fight against, I could never resist. Not that I wanted to. I had, in these last weeks, been granted my every wish and desire and though I felt undeserving of everything thus far, I was still touched by each and every miracle. And now, I knew one thing with certainty. I was in love with Bella Swan and by all indications, she returned that love even after I had bared my every imperfection to her entirely, turning my mere existence into a life that now had infinite potential. For the first time in nearly a century, I felt afraid. Afraid of what I now stood to lose.

Our declarations made, I stared at Bella, her warm fingers gliding over my hand like soft velvet. We sat there silently for a brief moment, taking in one another. The breeze swirled around us, the fragrant blooms kissing our skin with only a hint of Bella's scent, Mother Nature herself finally blessing our union.

"Why.....?" Bella questioned, hesitating.

"Yes?" I remarked, waiting for her to elaborate on her open-ended question, something I was still trying to adjust to. The sun seemed to intensify and throw further light off my skin, brightening her chocolate eyes to a dark honey colour, their clarity delectable as I gazed into them. I smiled at her, unsure of my emotions, so much of what I had experienced today being unchartered territory.

"Tell me why you ran from me before," she clarified, her smooth caramel eyes questioning in their intent.

"You know why," I replied reflexively, my smile disappearing. Surely she could not have further query as to why it was so VERY necessary that I ran in that instant.

Without me having to ask her once again what she was thinking, she specified without requiring my provocation. "No I mean EXACTLY what did I do wrong?" Before I could scold her for once again blaming herself for the situation she found herself in, Bella continued her explanation. "I'll have to be on my guard, you see, so I better start learning what I shouldn't do." Her eyes were wary and as she spoke further, Bella took my hand in hers and began to stroke it gently once again. The electricity was once again present, with deeper meaning behind it this time – love and acceptance. "This, for example, seems to be alright."

I smiled once again, wider this time, briefly closing my eyes as she increased the pressure of her touch, briefly allaying my fear. This was more than alright. This was the most wonderful sensation and though I knew I was addicted to her scent, her touch was beginning to become the most addictive thing about her, challenging the thirst with fervour. I craved her touch, needed her warmth, ached for her skin to be on mine. I had never felt more human.

"You didn't do anything wrong, Bella. It was my fault," I reassured her, opening my eyes. Even though she had surprised me repeatedly, she had done nothing but the right thing in reaction to me. I, on the other hand, had shown Bella nothing but weakness and irresponsibility in return.

"But I want to help, if I can, to not make it harder for you," she explained, her comforting words trickling from her tongue, Bella wanting nothing more than to make it easier for me. She was truly the most selfless person I had ever known. I thought for a moment though, and realised that if she could assist, it may ultimately make things easier for both of us.

"Well," I replied, hesitating. So many first-time events had occurred on this day that I had to sift through what had happened in my mind before I could make a constructive suggestion. Then the obvious answer came to me in an instant. "It was just how close you were. Most humans instinctively shy away from us, are repelled by our alienness. I wasn't expecting you to come so close. And the smell of your THROAT!" With that last statement, I stopped immediately, feeling as though I had said too much. My body tensed, waiting for her reaction.

She stared at me casually, once again as if nothing I said had upset her. She tucked her chin into her neck, no doubt trying to reduce the scent that was wafting from her gloriously mouth watering throat. Then she said something that made me laugh. "Okay, no throat exposure."

My booming laughter seemed to cocoon us, holding us together in a whirlwind of comfort and assurance. Of course, I could not expect Bella to spend eternity with her throat covered. It would not make any difference even if she did. "No really, it was more the surprise than anything else," I argued feebly.

I decided in that moment that I needed to push things a little further to prove my point. After all, Alice's vision had shown that I had the strength to hold Bella without killing her, and my hand had done little else than touch her very lightly, briefly and over small, select areas up until now. Even the time I carried her semi conscious to the nurses office on the day of the blood typing in our Biology class, I held her body away from mine, limiting our body contact to the absolute minimum to prevent my wayward thirst from ruining everything.

With my hand in hers, and still utilising every shred of self control that I could muster, I slowly and carefully raised my free hand to her throat, touching it gently, caressing its soft, silken length. I sighed, my breath hitching as I felt her pulse throb beneath my fingers.

Touching her neck felt unbelievable. Not only was it the centre of her life force and the warmest, most vulnerable point of her body, but caressing it without bringing her to harm somehow gave me a sense of empowerment and a faint glimmer of hope. Hope that in the future we may be able to pursue the more physical side of our relationship, albeit limited compared to that of a human. I smiled as I realised that Alice's vision was not such an improbability, and although it would take every bit of strength on my part to keep control, over time we may be able to work towards some small semblance of a physical relationship.

In that moment I longed to hold her in my arms more than anything. I began to fantasise about how embracing her would feel and I realised that her touch had finally won out. Even though her scent still surrounded me and attached itself to the skin of my hand, it was only an errant thought in the back of my mind at present. My thirst would always be there, but feelings that had warred within me previous to this day had somehow become clear and defined and there was no longer a battle going on. Each emotion now sat separated within my expanded mind, giving me the ability to deal with them more rationally, individually. The monster had finally been forced down to such an extent, that I would never allow it to take over and win again. Well, hoped that is.

Bella's expression in response to my touch was anything but fearful. I stared into her eyes and even though the light in the meadow had not changed, her pupils had dilated. Then, her heart began to increase its pace once again and his time, I knew her reaction had nothing to do with fear. I took in a small gasp, realising that her feelings were changing direction, in reaction, no doubt, to mine. The fear and doubt in her eyes had finally ebbed away, leaving nothing in its wake other than love and unbridled desire.

My still heart soared, but I knew that needed to keep things on an even keel. "You see, perfectly fine." I said, speaking casually while underneath all I wanted to do was take her roughly into my arms and crush her lips to mine.

My words did nothing to calm Bella. Her heart continued to race and increase in its intensity to such an extent that I could nearly hear her blood whooshing through each and every artery, vein and capillary, reuniting within her generous heart. The sound of this was something that was increasingly becoming a source of comfort and assurance to me, for as long as Bella had a beating, pulsating heart, I would have a reason to exist.

As further proof of her heart's reaction, the blood rushed to her face, her cheeks burning with greater intensity than I had ever seen before. I had to use every bit of my will and strength to stop myself from leaning into her and brushing my lips against Bella's red, overly warm and blood enriched skin. Every tiny corpuscle underneath her skin made her face appear translucent as the blood rushed to the apples of her cheeks. This nearly sent me into a frenzy, my feelings heightened to a level that I had never experienced. I started to take in shallow, panting breaths in reaction, as if I still had a thudding heart that needed calming.

"The blush on your cheeks is lovely," I commented, trying to keep the frenzy to a minimum as Bella's hands fell into her lap, conceding to me. I reached up to her cheeks, brushing the backs of my fingers against their heat lightly. I needed more. So much more. This was the moment that I knew would test me to the limit. My hands stretched over her cheeks and took in her face and jaw, and for the first time I held her magnificent face in my hands, all the while knowing I could crush her in an instant. I wanted to kiss her more than anything, but I knew I needed to take this one step at a time. I remembered Alice's vision once again and knew what I had to do. The electricity drew me in.

"Be very still," I requested, needing Bella to emit as little of her scent as possible to assist with my control, which began to waver again, the monster knocking on the door, waiting for me to slip. Bella complied.

Our eyes locked, and I hoped that if I kept them there for a moment I would not lose control. Finally gaining the courage, I leaned forward, breaking our gaze, and gently rested my cheek against the hollow of her throat, her pulsating blood calling to me. My breathing increased involuntarily, as my greedy body defied my mind's wishes by trying to taste her scent. My teeth were mere inches away from ending her. I concentrated with all my will to push away the monster once again. Bella did not move or speak.

Once I had gained enough control to proceed, with my hands still on her face, I slowly slid them down the sides of her neck. Bella shivered under my touch, nearly bringing me undone, my breath catching in reaction. How I wished I were human! My hands continued their movement to her shoulders and then stopped. I needed to gather my thoughts. I decided that I needed to inhale her scent completely, reasoning that this may assist with me desensitising myself to its intensity. My face slowly drifted to the side of her throat and I skimmed my nose across Bella's collarbone, taking her in. My throat exploded. I was on a razors edge, but was determined to remain in control of the monster.

Then, out of the blue, a feeling of calm overwhelmed the both of us. Bella's heart slowed and she took even, slow breaths once again. I instantly knew the cause.

_Think you need to settle down there Edward._

I was so wrapped up in my emotions that I had not noticed Jasper's scent as he sat high atop a branch of the spruce that I had nearly destroyed minutes before. I muttered under my breath as I held Bella closely, my face averted, too quickly and quietly for her to hear, "Jasper. I'm under control. Will you and Alice stop interfering?" Even though I tried to be angry, the tone of my low voice was sweet, on the verge of begging. Damn that Jasper!

_Alice told you to keep in control, remember? Just following orders Edward. You didn't see that I was in her vision?_

I had not seen Jasper in Alice's vision, however feeling what I felt in that moment, I had no choice but to keep going. I was too close to achieving what I wanted to stop. I decided to ignore Jasper's unwelcome presence and immerse myself in the moment. "Ah," I sighed as I calmly came to rest over her glorious, steady heart, its drum-like beat unlike anything I had ever experienced. I pressed my ear into her chest, making as much contact as was possible, and listened to that soothing, telling sound. I was, in a word, home.

Though I was somewhat grateful that Jasper had assisted me with my control, I could not help but feel a hollow sense of victory. The whole purpose of being alone with Bella was to test my resolve against my very deeply entrenched vampiric instincts. Nonetheless, we sat in the same position silently for several minutes. Bella remained still and I was at a loss to read her feelings. Of course, with Jasper here, her feelings were masked more than ever. I decided that going on with this further was an exercise in futility. I released my hold on Bella and sat up stiffly.

"It won't be so hard again," I said conveying satisfaction, my mood not in keeping with my heart. I was nothing close to satisfied, thanks to Jasper.

"Was that very hard for you?" Bella asked calmly, Jaspers influence an obvious factor in her evenness.

Of course it was not. "Not nearly as hard as I thought it would be. And you?" I questioned, knowing in my heart that her emotions were no more her own at this moment than mine.

"No it wasn't bad...for me," she replied, her inflection not lost on me. She obviously thought that I was finding it more difficult than her, and I was, at least up until the time of Jasper's interference.

"You know what I mean," I added, smiling at Bella, subtly turning my gaze to the canopy above.

My eyes narrowed as I stared through the branches and let Jasper know in no uncertain terms that he was an unwelcome guest. I knew we had to get out of here if we wanted any privacy. I had, after all, shown myself to her in the sun so there was no longer any need for us to stay in the forest. Perhaps it was time that we spent some time alone away from my interfering family, the sunshine protecting me from Jasper following. I needed to find out if we could progress to the next level, and I needed to be alone with Bella, without any outside influences to test this, or I would never be certain.

_Alright, alright Edward. I can take a hint. Just remember, Alice is watching for your future so I may be back if things look dicey._

With that thought, Jasper winked at me and slipped away, disappearing through the treetops. I listened for a moment, trying to detect further thoughts or aromas and though Alice still seemed to be close, hints of her scent still wafting through to the meadow, she was far enough away that I could not read her thoughts. I was going to have a few terse words with her later.

I returned my attention to the woman I loved. We were alone again. Well, as alone as one can be with two vampires lurking in the nearby forest.

I wanted her to know the residual effect of the contact of her skin to mine. "Here," I said as I took her hand, touching it to my near-warm cheek. "Do you feel how warm it is?"

Her eyes looked thoughtful and once again the desire seemed to be just beneath the surface.

"Don't move," she whispered. I complied immediately, closing my eyes as I stilled myself, doing the one thing that was second nature to me. My mind raced in anticipation of yet another new experience. I knew I was going to enjoy this. I could hear the grass underneath Bella move slowly, and her breathing became sharper and closer, her scent once again ruining me. I ignored it. I let out a small moan as her fingers caressed my cheek, moving delicately to stroke my eyelid as they circled the perimeter of my eye, and ran down the bridge of my nose, their journey finishing at my lips. My lips parted, wanting nothing more than to take her fingers within them, but instead I let out a deeper sigh, that was closer to a growl, my cool breath enveloping her. I knew in that moment that Jasper was definitely gone. My emotions were flying high. I was hungry for her, and this had nothing to do with her blood, though that desire seemed to amplify everything even further. I never wanted this sensation to end, but on the other hand was frightened of where it may lead when explored beyond this. Once again, my emotions began their relentless battle.

I opened my eyes and as I did, Bella's heart began thudding erratically as she stared into them.

"I wish...I wish you could feel....the complexity....the confusion...that I feel. That you could understand," I stammered feebly, wanting Bella to understand why this was so difficult. Words could not describe what I was feeling in that moment, every emotion that I knew, plus a few new ones, now brought to the surface, raw and uncensored.

I reached my hand across to her flaming hair and brushed it away from her beautiful face, wanting to take in every part of her.

"Tell me," she gasped.

How was I supposed to tell her when I myself did not understand what I was feeling? "I don't think I can," I conceded. "I've told you, on the one hand, the hunger – the thirst – that deplorable creature I am, I feel for you. And I think you can understand that to an extent," I said as I smiled lightly. "Though, as you are not addicted to any illegal substances, you probably can't empathise completely."

"But," I continued, hesitating as I tried to articulate my words carefully, touching Bella's sweet lips as I did so, causing Bella to shiver softly. "There are other hungers," I said, Bella's shiver accentuating my statement. "Hungers I don't even understand, that are foreign to me," I said innocently, confusion etched on my features.

Her answer was immediate, deliberate. "I may understand THAT better than you think," she replied. In this situation, I would need her human experiences to guide me. With all my decades of existence, having studied a plethora of books, attended the best universities and excelled in every possible way, this was one area that I was at a loss to deal with. Even though, over time, I had heard the thoughts of my family when they were otherwise occupied with their partners, I did not understand the emotions behind what they were experiencing, nor the complexity or intensity of them. Even asking Carlisle to explain it to me left him at a loss for words.

"I'm not used to feeling this human," I confessed. "Is it always like this?" I questioned, hoping Bella could shed further light on the subject.

"For me?" she paused. "No never. Never before this," she replied. I was frustrated, but at the same time elated that Bella had never experienced feelings such as this before. And I was the one who had brought them out in her. I smiled, realising that we were two souls exploring this new frontier together, everything just as strange and wonderful to Bella as it was to me. That thought gave me a great sense of comfort.

I held her hands between mine and gave them a gentle squeeze. Then I looked down, suddenly realising that I was less of a man than she deserved. "I don't know how to be close to you. I don't know if I can," I admitted, ashamed of my own weaknesses, wanting more than ever to be as loving and affectionate as any man would be towards the woman he loves. Ah, the things Bella would have to sacrifice to be with me!

Bella leaned in cautiously towards me and placed her heated cheek on my chest, my breathing becoming elevated as she did so. Her cheek burned so much against my skin, that it would not have surprised me if it had seared an indelible mark in its wake. "This is enough," she assured, sighing into my hard skin. I shivered, her hot breath bringing me closer. I leaned into Bella and pressed my face into her hair, the scent of strawberries and freesias thick in my nostrils. My eyes rolled in ecstasy for a brief moment.

"You're better at this than you give yourself credit for," she remarked. She would not be saying this if she could see my expression.

I gently cleared my throat, trying in vain to expel the scent and the feeling, and replied, "I have human instincts. They may be buried deep, but they're there." That was the understatement of the century.

We sat there, within each others' careful embrace, for what seemed to be hours. I did not want this to end.

The sun, which was beginning to disappear behind the canopy, had other ideas. The day's end was drawing nearer. Bella sighed, somewhat breaking the spell, reality looming around us. I stated, "You have to go."

"I thought you couldn't read my mind," she replied, still leaning into my embrace.

"It's getting clearer," I responded, smiling to myself. I could only dream that my statement was fact.

As we both stood up, I put my hands on Bella's shoulders and took in her gaze, my smile widening as an idea struck. I wanted to once again reveal more about myself to the woman I loved. "Can I show you something?" I asked excitedly. This was going to be interesting...

"Show me what?" she questioned curiously under hooded eyes.

"I'll show you how I travel in the forest," I replied, glancing at Bella's look of trepidation. "Don't worry, you'll be very safe, and I'll get you to the truck much faster," I reasoned with practicality, unable to suppress the smile which spread crookedly across my face.

"Will you turn into a bat?" Bella asked warily, her eyes widening. Though she did not mean it to be a joke, I could not help but throw my head back and let go with a thunderous guffaw. "Like I haven't heard THAT before!" I exclaimed, my uproarious laughter echoing around the meadow. I loved that I could express myself fully with Bella without her even flinching.

"Right, I'm sure you get that all the time," Bella responded, an uncertain smile on her plump lips.

"Come on little coward, climb on my back," I said encouragingly. Bella hesitated, waiting for me to tell her that I was kidding, no doubt. I smiled reassuringly at her in an attempt to allay her anxiety, and reached for Bella. Her heart raced once again in response and though I knew it was more akin to fear, I wanted more than anything for her to experience what I had to offer. All of it. I dexterously lifted Bella onto my back and stopped for a brief second as I felt her legs wrap around me and her arms cling to my neck. I had NEVER had this much body contact with her. I felt her every muscle, every bone and every pulse point radiate around my body and knew one thing for certain. I. WANTED. MORE.

Bella interrupted my thoughts, which had suddenly digressed to a level that I had not experienced before. "I'm a bit heavier than your average backpack," she warned, bringing me back to my reverie. Even after my demonstration of strength earlier, Bella obviously did not understand my ability to carry much more than her weight without effort.

"Huh!" I snorted, rolling my eyes. Her body clung tighter in response, bringing me undone once again and I instinctively took her hand from my neck and pressed her palm against my face, inhaling deeply as I did so. What I really wanted to do was to kiss every part of that hand.

"Easier all the time," I muttered. Well, at least Bella's scent was getting easier to withstand. Instead, I was now beginning to battle with my other desires.

I began to run, trying to push the feelings out of me as I did. Bella's body enveloped mine as I ran, and the heat radiating from her was incredible! My breathing increased, though I tried with all my might to even it out. As the trees ghosted past us, I made a revelation. I needed Bella and wanted more than anything to show her how much I loved her. I knew that even though we had achieved so much today already, that I wanted to end it with something binding that would leave no doubt in her mind or mine the unbreakable bond we now shared. I was tired of fighting with my emotions – they were only going to win anyway. I needed to think about what I was going to do next.

About half way through our journey, I crossed Alice's scent, which was still quite strong and fresh. I kept running, not wanting her to interfere with this day for one more second. She, on the other hand, had other ideas. To the north I spotted Alice streaking through the forest parallel to where I ran, and I hoped that Bella had not seen her. I pushed ahead, trying to ignore her presence.

_Wait, Edward! You've just got to see this! _Before I could stop and scold Alice for her rude intrusion she showed me her vision as I leapt over a fallen tree trunk. I was in shock. Not only was I holding Bella, but I was......KISSING HER!

I ran even faster as Alice disappeared once again, the elation, disbelief and wonderment burning through my body as every muscle and tendon stretched within me.

Within a matter of minutes, we had arrived back to the truck, my run slowing to a fast walk, then to a complete stop near some ferns on the side of the path. "Exhilarating isn't it?" I asked, excited about what I had just seen myself do, my laboured breaths nothing to do with the exertion from running. I waited for Bella to disentangle herself from me. Though I was happy for her to take her time, she did not move.

"Bella?" I asked, waiting anxiously for a response. Her breathing seemed laboured, nearly panicked.

"I think I need to lie down," she gasped.

"Oh, sorry," I apologised, waiting for her to move once again as I slowed my breathing down. I realised I had made a mistake and that perhaps the speed at which I ran, by no means being assisted by Alice, may have disorientated Bella to such an extent that it may have made her feel faint. I had never run with a human on my back before, so had no way of gauging what her reaction may have been.

"I think I need help," she requested weakly.

I laughed nervously as I gently loosened her hold around my neck, pulling her body around to cradle her in my arms. Now this....this was what I had wanted. Then I looked at Bella's face, which had lost some of its beautiful colour. That face brought me back to reality and I realised that I had more pressing matters to attend to other than my selfish desires.

As I carefully placed her down on the soft cushion of the ferns beneath her I asked, "How do you feel?"

"Dizzy I think," she replied, her eyes barely open.

"Put your head between your knees," I suggested.

Bella complied and I watched her carefully as she inhaled and exhaled deeply, and without realising it I was sitting next to her, the ferns surrounding us, nearly camouflaging us. After a few moments, Bella slowly brought her head up, but the colour of her skin had not improved.

"I guess that wasn't the best idea," I mused.

"No, that was very interesting," she responded, her voice still weak.

I studied her face, which was ashen, and said, "Huh! You're as white as a ghost." Then I corrected myself humourlessly. "No – you're as white as ME!"

"I think I should have closed my eyes," she said as her eyes closed in response to her own words. Of course! Bella's human eyes were in no way able to deal with the speed of my travels. Add that to the fact that she had dubious balance, her inner ear obviously less than functional, and you have a severe case of motion sickness.

"Remember that next time," I suggested, moving in closer.

"Next time!" Bella groaned. I could not help but laugh in response to her childish complaint. "Show off," she muttered. Well, she was probably right there. I had been prancing around like a proud peacock for much of today. I just could not help myself with Bella though. I wanted so much for her to know everything about me, that I allowed my silly ego get in the way.

As the moments passed, I continued to move in closer, looking at her face, and watching the colour of her skin slowly return to normal. The delectable pink shade had returned to her lips once again and her cheeks pulsated with fresh blood. My thoughts came full circle, and arrived once again at my desire, and Alice's vision.

"Open your eyes Bella," I said quietly, the need for her bubbling beneath the surface, my face now inches from hers. She opened her eyes as sat there, stunned, my only hope that it was in a good way.

I needed to let her know what was on my mind. "I was thinking while I was running...." I said, pausing, unable to think of a way to tell her my deepest desires without frightening her away, or alluding to the fact that Alice had seen what was to occur.

"About not hitting the trees, I hope." There she was, surprising me again.

"Silly Bella," I responded, chuckling. "Running is second nature to me, it's not something I have to think about."

"Show off," she muttered once again, reminding me that my ego was getting in the way again. I smiled, realising that though it were true, if it were not for my ego and sense of bravado we would not have come as far as we had today. Desire once again filled me to the brim, and I could no longer resist what I was feeling.

"No," I said, my mind now back on the task at hand. "I was thinking that I wanted to try something."

I took her face in my hands gently, and as I did so Bella's breathing stopped. I hesitated at her response, unsure of what this reaction was, but I only needed to look into her eyes, her pupils once again dilating, giving me an indication that she did not want me to stop what I was doing. My hesitation made me feel more human than ever, for I knew that if I was human and was about to experience kissing the woman I loved for the first time, this would be my exact reaction.

I also needed to show great restraint, and I was concerned that even if I lost one speck of control that I would crush Bella's beautiful face within my hands. I continued to lean into her gently pulling her face up to meet mine, her eyes deeper than ever under the shade of the ferns, filled with want. Want for me. I saw my eyes reflected in hers and knew that I returned those feelings with multiplicity.

The seconds passed until our lips finally met. Her lips were giving, soft, and wet. They were unlike anything I had ever felt in my hundred years! Every fantasy, thought and curious question could not compare to actually FEELING her lips against mine. It was as if her lips were designed especially for me, every part of her soft velveteen skin molding perfectly around the hardness of mine.

Though I was finally kissing Bella, I knew I needed to show restraint. Before I could muster any further thought whatsoever, Bella did something that took me completely by surprise, shocking me to the core.

Her breath rushed out of her lungs and entered my mouth, scorching down my throat like someone had poured liquid lava into my body, burning me from the inside out. But, not in a bad way. In an uncontrollable, unhinged and lustful way, the burning not painful but something I craved, wanted more than ANYTHING! Though I had inhaled her scent many times up until now, this was the first time that it overtook every bone, muscle, vein and organ within my body. I was enraptured, my self control at the weakest possible point ever. Her hands ran through my hair, clutching herself to me. Her lips parted, and she inhaled, inviting me to explore her as her scent surrounded me so much that there was nowhere to hide. The monster growled within me, along with my lust, desire, fear, want and every other emotion all rolled into a frightening ball within the pit of my stomach, causing me to shiver and react in a way that I could not have predicted. I froze. Froze! My body became statue-like as the overwhelming sensations pulsated through me.

I pushed Bella's face back instinctively, slowly, to release her hold on me. I mourned at the loss of her lips on mine, but knew I needed to gather myself and push the monster way down deep once again. She opened her eyes in response to my withdrawal, gazing at me with a combination of desire tinged with a little guilt.

"Oops," she gasped, her breathing still uneven and her lips bright red. Oh how I wanted to take those lips onto mine again!

"That's an understatement," I replied, my jaw clenching as I held her face in my hands, her tempting lips and delicious skin still inches away, the fire within me continuing to burn relentlessly.

She must have sensed my inner battle. "Should I.....?" she said selflessly as she tried to move. Even though I knew it was the responsible thing to do, I could not let her go. I needed to get through this, to have her near when I did.

"No, it's tolerable," I responded, still unable to let her go. "Wait for a moment please," I added as the fire, though still within me, started to ebb away and in its place was a warm, floating feeling. A feeling of release, of contentment and of......victory!

I smiled at Bella releasing my hold, and said, "There."

"Tolerable?" Bella asked, repeating the word I had said earlier. She was more than tolerable. She was totally and utterly desirable. Too much for her own good.

I laughed loudly at her question and said proudly, "I'm stronger than I thought. It's nice to know."

"I wish I could say the same. I'm sorry," Bella replied apologetically, her human weakness though life-threatening, was more than delightful.

"You ARE only human after all," I responded, humour still in my eyes.

"Thanks so much," she replied as if I had insulted her. If only she knew how much I desired to be just as she was. Human – filled with frailty, weakness, love and unbridled passion for life. I, along with the rest of my family, valued human life over anything else and would give up anything to be human once again.

I stood, taking her hand into mine, and a look of surprise crossed Bella's face. We had now arrived at a point where I was able to touch Bella without so much fear, and she was still getting used to that very concept. She stood, though still seemed unsteady on her feet.

"Are you still faint from the run? Or was it my kissing expertise?" I asked, and as I said it I realised that if I were human, I would be blushing. I knew now more than ever that Bella had brought all of my human frailties out and that leaving her now would bring about physical pain.

"I can't be sure. I'm still woozy," she replied lazily, her speech slow. "I think it's some of both, though," she added.

I needed to get her home and for the next few moments we argued about who would be driving her truck back to town. As Bella stubbornly headed to the driver's side of the truck, I looped my arms around her to stop her. Ah, I was holding my love once again!

I looked into her eyes as I embraced her. "Bella. I've already expended a great deal of personal effort at this point to keep you alive. I'm not about to let you behind the wheel of a vehicle when you can't even walk straight. Besides, friends don't let friends drive drunk," I quoted, chuckling, as Bella drew in a deep breath. If I did not know better I would say that she was smelling me. I shivered.

"Drunk?" she objected.

"You're intoxicated by my presence," I stated, smirking evilly at her.

"I can't argue with that," she said in concession, taking the key out of her pocket and holding it above me, suddenly dropping it. My hand, of course, caught it in an instant.

"Take it easy. My truck's a senior citizen," Bella warned, nearly scowling at me.

"Very sensible," I assured her as I stared lovingly at her.

"And you are not affected at all by my presence?" she queried, completely changing the course of our conversation. Was she KIDDING?

Without a word, I bent my face into hers, brushing my lips against her jaw, from her ear to her chin, causing her to tremble. I smiled onto her skin, loving that I had that effect on her, all the while knowing I needed to keep control, save me taking her into my arms and covering her body with mine. Achieving that goal would have to wait.

"Regardless, I have better reflexes," I whispered onto her delicate, pale and wonderful skin.

Suddenly, I heard Alice's laughter echo through the forest, and I looked up and stared into the distance. I caught sight of Alice and Jasper, their smiles of approval and childish behaviour evident on their faces. They turned and ran, arm in arm, into the darkness. I was going to have more than a few terse words with those two when I got home......


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This is torture you know....I truly only wanted to write a one shot...yet here I am...tapping away at a fourth chapter. I'm not sure how many more I will write...I'm working on another secret project...hehehe, but I will endeavour to keep this going as long as I can....however only for as long as I get some more reviews. After all, it's of no use to write this chapter if no-one's reading the darn thing! So keep em rolling in! Thanks so far to Totteacher, Jia225, FYInichole, vsmith, dazzleglo, bubblehearts, renee and mommygirl for reviewing my story. Aww you guys are just great!!!!**

**This is of course the chapter that leads up to where Edward officially sleeps over...well as much as a vampire can sleep anyways!**

**Jen...you know you've twisted my arm for this one....and I hope your arm is feeling better too! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters – not fair is it? (I said as I stamped my foot)**

EPOV

We travelled at the trucks limited speed, and whilst I easily managed to keep the wheels perfectly aligned with the white lines of the bitumen, the main focus of my attention was directed toward one thing. My Bella. My hand reached across the seat and took hers, her warmth never doing anything less than shocking me, as I welcomed the setting sun which had never looked more perfect. My ever-still heart was soaring. I could not have imagined a more apt way to end this most perfect of all days. I watched her as she opened the window, her flaming tendrils of hair sweeping behind her and her scent swirling around the small cabin in which we sat, harmony and peace being the emotion at the forefront, overruling every other temptation. Never in my existence had I ever imagined that I could feel such a sense of contentment.

As she stared out the window, I took my hand briefly off the wheel to turn the radio on, not wanting for one second to take my hand from hers. I wanted to fill my ears with a romantic song to reflect my feelings, so I tuned it in to a station which specialised in playing songs from the 1950's. The knob from the radio fell off in my hand as I did so, and before Bella could notice anything amiss, I quickly reattached it using as little force as possible, save it falling apart in my hand. I was quite surprised that the radio worked at all, considering the dilapidated state of the truck. Perhaps both were in need of replacement. All in good time.

'Little Bitty Pretty One' by Thurston Harris way playing, a song which I knew word for word, its title somewhat apt for the company I was keeping at this moment. Though, Bella was more than merely pretty. I could not even think of any word in the English language that described her unique beauty, and every adjective I thought of did not seem to do her justice. That, I realised, was because her beauty was more than one dimensional. It was not only external, but everything about Bella's beauty exuded from within, radiated outwardly and touched all who surrounded her. From her selflessness to her wisdom, to her shyness and even her clumsiness...all of these wondrous things added up to one foregone conclusion in my mind.....unparalleled perfection.

I quietly sang along to the song as Bella looked at me and smiled, finally opening her beautiful mouth that, I was happy to admit, had been on mine this very day. I smiled in exultation at that very thought as she spoke.

"You like fifties music?" she asked. I loved the questions she asked of me. They never seemed to be what I expect, and her curiosity to discover more never seemed to waver. That, so it would seem, would be something else we shared in common. I would neither tire of asking her questions, nor be anything but fascinated by her surprising answers. Ever.

"Music in the fifties was good. Much better than the sixties or the seventies, ugh!" I exclaimed as I shuddered, remembering how ridiculous Emmett looked when he tried to sport hippy clothing to fit in with the humans, though I knew that it was more than a matter of merely wanting to fit in. I sometimes thought that he still longed to live in that time, his easy going nature in keeping with the 'free love' movement of that era, unlike his conservative partner.

I shook my head, slightly smiling as I recalled seeing Rosalie dressed for Prom in a tight sequinned red dress with huge shoulder pads, her blond hair teased and lacquered to within an inch of its life. "The eighties were bearable," I added. Of course, if it were not for Rosalie's outrageous fashion sense at that time, the eighties would have been yet another forgettable decade, blurring into the nineties. My smiled widened, as my thoughts scattered to another time and place and replayed the memories of Emmett and Rosalie's ridiculous looking outfits worn over that time period. Even Alice was somewhat offended by their garb, her fashion sense being as chic as it was.

Bella's surprising question suddenly brought me back to the glorious reality that I found myself in once again.

"Are you ever going to tell me how old you are?" she asked, curiosity burning in the depths of those chocolate brown eyes. Now, that was the million dollar question. I continued to smile at her warmly, though I was at a loss as to how to broach the subject of my real age. After all, I was by all definitions still seventeen, my body frozen in a state of suspended animation, forever a teenager, just as she was presently. Then, of course, there was the other side of the argument. The fact that I had gained ninety years of experience and wisdom to compliment my age could never be overlooked. How could I answer this truthfully, without peril? Without somehow making Bella feel less than she truly was? Without sending her running for the hills?

"Does it matter much?" I replied casually, hoping she would let the matter go. Of course, knowing Bella as I did, that was a highly unlikely probability.

"No, but I still wonder..." she replied hesitantly, grimacing. Then, she appeared to make light of the subject. "There's nothing like an unsolved mystery to keep you up at night."

My thoughts were suddenly spoken out loud, my mouth moving without my mind thinking about the consequences. "I wonder if it will upset you," I said reflectively as I gazed into the perfection of the sunset. It was one of a plethora of sunsets that I had seen, five times more than Bella had witnessed, or ever will, in her lifetime. That issue was at the crux of my argument, one which would prove difficult to circumvent.

Impatience getting the better of her no doubt, Bella said challengingly, "Try me."

I sighed, staring off into the road as I pondered, trying to find an answer within the painted white lines and blackness of the bitumen. I knew I had to be honest. Of course, Bella would understand. She had, as with everything else on this momentous day, been more than able to cope with each and every thing about me thus far. How could this be any different? In the grand scheme of things, I mused, was my age any more troublesome than the fact that I was a vampire? With these thoughts, it put me immediately at ease and I took a deep breath and finally opened up to her, albeit slightly.

"I was born in Chicago in 1901," I said, hesitating to gauge her reaction. Her response was unsurprised, and this encouraged me to continue. Oh, how accepting she was of me! "Carlisle found me in a hospital in the summer of 1918. I was seventeen, and dying of Spanish influenza," I continued, watching Bella for any signs of distress.

Of course, as could be expected, Bella gasped. Her intake of air, though barely audible to human ears, was as clear as a bell to mine. The actuality of how I came to be the monster that I am today was obviously going to be a problem for Bella. I needed to be very careful of what to say next. I stared searchingly into her eyes, though they did not provide me with any easy answers. Her heart still beat in a steady rhythm, somewhat reassuring me to continue, yet once again I desperately wished that I could read her mind.

"I don't remember it well – it was a very long time ago, and human memories fade," I explained, hoping that my recount of my vague memories may incite her to redirect our conversation. Then again, I argued, why was I holding on to secrets after already revealing so much to her already? I decided on a compromise. I would tell her that Carlisle had changed me, but would not reveal the gruesome details of how that change came about.

"I do remember how it felt, when Carlisle saved me. It's not an easy thing, not something you could forget." Up until now, I had never reasoned that Carlisle had actually saved me. For many years after I had been changed, I resented the fact that everything that I cared about in my human life had been cruelly taken away from me and though it was not Carlisle's fault, I nonetheless felt regretful that I had not died on that fateful day alongside my parents. For my family, above all else, being human was the most highly valued commodity.

"Your parents?" she questioned, as if just having read my mind.

"They had already died from the disease. I was alone. That was why he chose me. In the chaos of the epidemic, no-one would ever realise I was gone."

Then, the question I feared most slipped from Bella's lips, her words contradicting the sweetness of them. "How did he....save you?"

Once again, I knew I needed to leave out details of my transformation, the reality of which would be too much for any human to bear.

"It was difficult. Not many of us have the restraint necessary to accomplish it. But Carlisle has always been the most humane, the most compassionate of us.....I don't think you could find his equal throughout all of history." I paused, not wanting to continue but her eyes were clearly waiting for more. "For me, it was merely very, very painful," I explained vaguely. I hoped that statement would bring the subject to a close. My lips clamped shut, as if an invisible zipper had been dragged across them, involuntarily refusing to elaborate.

With that, her mind seemed to go into a freefall, all thoughts seemingly crashing through her curious eyes in one fell swoop. Though I was not privy to the inner workings of Bella's mind, I knew in an instant what she was thinking. Panic began to set in as I realised that she was starting to grasp the reality of how I came to be. How I still exist. And how, I do not belong in this time. Her time. I was a walking anachronism, my time gone long ago.

I decided to attempt to justify Carlisle's motives, hoping to allay her fear and confusion. I, after all, was eternally grateful to Carlisle, for if he had not chosen to change me, Bella would never be part of my existence.

"He acted from loneliness. That's usually the reason behind the choice. I was the first in Carlisle's family, though he found Esme soon after. She fell from a cliff. They brought her to the hospital morgue, though, somehow, her heart was still beating." I hoped that I had not revealed too much about how Esme came to be in this life. I loved her dearly and respected her more than any other. She was the closest thing I had to a mother, after all. Her tragedy was not something I felt I could share with Bella as I hoped that Esme, perhaps sometime soon, may have the courage to share her story with Bella herself.

"So you must be dying, then, to become...." Bella said, unable to admit what I was. I, for that matter, had trouble with it every day of my existence.

"No, that's just Carlisle," I replied quickly, hoping to relieve the awkwardness she must now feel. "He would never do that to someone who had a choice. It's easier he says, though, if the blood is weak." I did not know how much more of this I could stand. I was discussing gruesome facts with Bella, and that did not sit well with me. The sun now set, I stared into the black depths of the road once again, looking for answers to no avail, as I switched on the headlights. Bella, on the other hand, chose to continue relentlessly with her curious line of questioning.

"And Emmett and Rosalie?"

"Carlisle brought Rosalie to our family next. I didn't realise till much later that he was hoping she would be to me what Esme was to him – he was careful with his thoughts around me," I said, rolling my eyes.

Of course, I NEVER saw Rosalie in that light. As beautiful as she was, her soul lacked depth and her heart remained forever bitter after the trauma of her transformation. That in itself precluded her from ever being any more than a family member to me, but of course on top of that, I had no response to her. No chemistry. Nothing. And I knew her thoughts on the matter as well. She was never interested in me either, much to Carlisle's disappointment. The only reaction from her was a bruised ego due to my lack of desire for her. She had, after all, attracted every human within a ten mile radius when she was human and was unused to rejection.

"But she was never more than a sister. It was only two years later that she found Emmett. She was hunting – we were in Appalachia at the time – and found a bear about to finish him off. She carried him back to Carlisle, more than a hundred miles, afraid she wouldn't be able to do it herself. I'm only beginning to guess how difficult that journey was for her," I elaborated as I stared intently at Bella, raising our intertwined hands to brush the back of mine against her fragile, wonderful skin.

Of course, I understood more than anyone the pain that Rosalie would have endured to resist the call of Emmett's blood. And even though it did not hold a scrap of appeal in comparison to what Bella's blood did for me, I respected Rosalie for her strength of character to overcome the temptation that, no doubt, would have been unsurmountable to overcome for most other vampires. Rosalie was the strongest, most doggedly determined person that I knew and for that one act, the only selfless one that I recalled her ever committing, I admired her immensely.

"But she made it," Bella replied encouragingly, looking away from my thoughtful eyes as she spoke.

"Yes," I murmured. "She saw something in his face that made her strong enough. And they've been together ever since. Sometimes they live separately from us, as a married couple. But the younger we pretend to be, the longer we can stay in any given place. Forks seemed perfect, so we all enrolled in high school," I said as I laughed, having lost count of all the times we had matriculated, and how many wedding ceremonies and destroyed cottages we had endured over the decades. "I suppose we'll have to go to their wedding in a few years, AGAIN." I added. With that thought, my mind wandered briefly and I fantasised about Bella being on my arm as I escorted her to their wedding, my family as loving and accepting of her as I. Oh, how I wished that could be a reality, or even a faint possibility!

"Alice and Jasper?" Bella questioned, her eyes warm and inviting, causing me to draw a small gasp. I needed to focus once again, and though her scent was washing out the window, her mesmerising eyes somehow had the ability to hypnotise me within their gaze, their depths calling to me whenever I stared into them.

I regained my train of thought, and focused on her question. "Alice and Jasper are two very rare creatures. They both developed a conscience, as we refer to it, with no outside guidance. Jasper belonged to another....family, a VERY different kind of family. He became depressed, and he wandered on his own. Alice found him. Like me, she has certain gifts above and beyond the norm for our kind," I said, realising that I had possibly revealed too much regarding Alice. Ah, Bella had a way about her....my human instincts being brought to the fore once again by her gently seductive eyes.

"Really?" she said, interrupting, her eyes filled with fascination. "But you said you were the only one who could hear people's thoughts," she argued, misunderstanding what I had said. I had a decision to make. Do I tell Bella about Alice's visions? If I do tell her, then will she ask me about Alice's visions of her? Of course, Bella would not be satisfied without an explanation, so I decided to tell her the truth in a way to circumvent those probabilities.

"That's true. She knows other things. She SEES things – things that might happen, things that are coming. But it's very subjective. The future isn't set in stone. Things change." My jaw tightened, the instinct to clam up about this subject at the forefront. My eyes darted away from her face and back, her eyes drawing me in once again.

"What kind of things does she see?"

Oh, I don't know. Visions of me holding and kissing you??? I decided to elaborate on Alice and Jasper's meeting to avoid discussing the delicate subject of Alice's visions of Bella.

"She saw Jasper and knew that he was looking for her before he knew it himself. She saw Carlisle and our family, and they came together to find us. She's the most sensitive to non-humans. She always sees, for example, when another group of our kind is coming near. And any threat they may pose." I hoped that my alluding to Alice being sensitive to vampires would stop Bella making further query regarding anything that Alice had seen about her.

"Are there a lot....of your kind?" Bella questioned, a surprised look on her face, no doubt still trying to absorb what I had revealed about Alice's special talents.

I was thankful of the fact that there were so few of us in existence and that we had not, thanks in part to the Volturi wiping many of us out during the newborn wars, spread across each continent like some sort of cursed plague. Our numbers meant that, even for those who still hunted humans, we did not affect the populous to a great extent. Even when hunting animals, as my family chose to do, we were ever mindful of the impact on the environment and always ensured we did not hunt in the one place for extended periods, widely varying the species that we killed.

"No, not many. But most won't settle in any one place. Only those like us, who have given up hunting you people," I paused and shot Bella a sly glance, studying her response, "Can live together with humans for any length of time. We've only found one other family like ours, in a small village in Alaska. We lived together for a time, but there were so many of us that we became too noticeable. Those of us who live....differently, tend to band together."

Of course, staying in Alaska was also not a viable option for reasons other than us being noticed by the humans. Whenever we visited Alaska, Tanya had, in the past, attempted to seduce me on more than one occasion. The last time that I spurned her advances, it became very uncomfortable to live around Tanya and her family and in turn, my attempts to eke out a life in Alaska became more difficult to negotiate. Eventually, in frustration, I told her in a less than gentlemanly way to back off, which in turn caused a dramatic chain of events that would forever change my destiny. I was now grateful to Tanya in a way. If my family had not supported me and taken the decision to move to Forks, I would not be sitting here, talking to this goddess.

"And the others?" she asked as I pulled over to park outside her home.

"Nomads, for the most part. We've all lived that way at times. It gets tedious, like anything else. But we run across the others now and then, because most of us prefer the north."

I stopped the engine, turned off the lights and we sat in total darkness, not even the moon to light the way for Bella's beautiful human eyes. There was neither a patrol car in the driveway, nor a sound emanating from the house. We were alone. Here. Outside the one place that I knew better than the back of my granite-like hand. The crickets played their gentle song in unison, interrupting the quiet.

"Why is that?" she asked unexpectedly, bringing me back to her. I smiled. That question was so HUMAN.

"Did you have your eyes open this afternoon?" I teased. "Do you think I could walk down the street without causing traffic accidents? There's a reason why we chose the Olympic Peninsula, one of the most sunless places in the world. It's nice to be able to go outside in the day. You wouldn't believe how tired you can get of night time in eighty-odd years." Though, more recently, I had every reason to enjoy the night just as much as the day. Night times were when I watched Bella sleep, and that meant more to me than a thousand sun drenched days, which I would gladly sacrifice to hear her whisper my name as she slept. Her slumber was, after all, the only way I could in any way see into Bella's confounding mind.

She smiled in realisation of her obvious question already have been answered and asked, "So that's where the legends come from?"

"Probably," I answered, nodding slowly.

"And Alice came from another family, like Jasper?"

Ah, poor Alice. "No, and that IS a mystery. Alice doesn't remember her human life at all. And she doesn't know who created her. She awoke alone. Whoever made her walked away, and none of us understand why, or how, he could. If she hadn't had that other sense, if she hadn't seen Jasper and Carlisle and known that she would someday become one of us, she probably would have turned into a total savage."

Bella hesitated, her face appearing deep in thought and sympathetic. I sensed that she had a special curiosity and heartfelt concern for Alice, as Alice did for her. Perhaps there was more truth to Alice's visions than I had ever envisaged and though I knew it could be fraught with peril, I conceded that these two women were more than capable of developing some sort of special relationship. Besides Jasper, I had never seen Alice respond to anyone, human or vampire, like she had to Bella. Of course, I understood the forceful feeling and magnetism that Bella exuded more than anyone, but was ever-mindful of the possibly dark consequences that their friendship could invite.

Suddenly, as if to signal her departure, Bella's stomach growled in hunger.

"I'm sorry, I'm keeping you from dinner," I said apologetically.

"I'm fine, really," she replied as her stomach defied her words once again.

"I've never spent much time around anyone who eats food. I forget."

Then Bella said something that made my body jolt with excitement. "I want to stay with you," she whispered quietly, no doubt hoping that her blush would not be noticeable in the darkness. Of course, that was not the case, and as I thought about her statement, I did not want Bella to go either. I needed her to stay with me, talk to me and touch me. Since the beginning of this day, I had noticed that the more I inhaled her scent, the more I began to overcome its power. I was frightened to leave her. Frightened because if I went twenty four hours without seeing her, I wondered if her scent would be overwhelming to me once again, bringing me back to square one.

"Can't I come in?" I asked casually, carefully masking my desperation.

Then, she answered my question with a question of her own. "Would you like to?" WAS SHE KIDDING?

I cleared my throat quietly, the lump that had formed in it somehow becoming difficult to dislodge. "Yes, if it's alright," I whispered, my body defying my words of serenity as I opened the truck door, closed it quickly behind me and stood at the passenger side of the truck before she could blink, waiting for her as she wound up the window.

As I gallantly opened her door she said complimentarily, "Very human."

"It's definitely resurfacing," I responded as she alighted from the truck. We walked side by side towards the porch in silence, Bella occasionally glancing at me and smiling, her mere presence lighting up the moonless night in her wake.

My anxiety and curiosity piqued, we approached the porch and before she could notice that I had done it, in a blur I retrieved the key under the eave and unlocked the door, put the key back in its home and opened the door. As I waited for Bella to enter, she stepped through and hesitated in the doorway. "The door was unlocked?" she asked of me, confused.

Before I could stop myself I blurted out, "No, I used the key from under the eave." I hoped that she did not think ill of me for using the key, or of having an unexplained knowledge of its existence.

As if I could see her in no other way, she reached inside the door and flicked on the porch light, her beautiful eyebrows raised at me in question under its glow.

Before she could threaten to have her father arrest me for breaking and entering, I explained lamely, "I was curious about you."

"You spied on me?" she asked weakly, her voice not using the force of accusation. She nearly seemed....flattered by the attention. Once again, this woman had surprised me with her reaction. No matter what I seemed to do, she was accepting of it. Remarkable. She was truly....remarkable!

"What else is there to do at night?" I replied, unrepentant of my behaviour. She headed for the kitchen, turning the lights on as she walked, and in my excitement to explore her home with her for the first time, I got there before her and sat in one of the kitchen chairs. Somewhat surprised, Bella stood in the kitchen and set about her task of satisfying her hunger. My mind digressed as I thought about other hungers I yearned to help her satisfy, while at the same time my heart ached mournfully at the notion that those hungers could never be sated. Not by me, anyway.

Bringing my mind back to the present, I watched Bella, fascinated by everything she did. She walked to the refrigerator and retrieved some food, which looked like some sort of congealed red vegetable and cheese lump, and placed it in the microwave. The scent that permeated from the food began to make me gag, but I used every ounce of control I had to control that reflex. I surmised that it would be just as disgusting to her if she saw what I ate.

As she watched the food rotating, she spoke once again, her question pulling me out of my train of thought which was rapidly descending to the darker issue of my feeding habits.

"How often?"

"Hmmm?" I replied vaguely, the smell of the food overpowering the kitchen as I wondered what Bella would think of me if she saw me drink the blood of another living thing.

"How often did you come here?" she elaborated, still unable to turn to face me, her anxiety forcing my mind to focus on the question at hand. I knew I had to answer honestly. She had already noted my familiarity with her home so it was of no use to backtrack on my statement.

"Almost every night," I replied, readying myself for her response.

Her heartbeat escalated slightly as she whirled around to face me, her scent briefly overpowering the smell of the food, and asked, stunned, "Why?" How was I going to explain this without seeming like a crazed stalker? Though my curiosity was nothing but innocent was I, after all, any different from a lowly peeping Tom?

"You're interesting when you sleep. You talk," I replied, being more honest than was probably necessary, immediately regretting my statement.

"No!" she gasped, gripping the kitchen counter for support. Her face was on fire, her anger and embarrassment combined making her blush extend to the farther reaches of her face and down her neck. I swallowed thickly, that sight making her thoroughly desirable, all the while knowing that I needed to apologise and help her calm down.

"Are you very angry with me?" I asked with chagrin.

"That depends!" she replied, gasping each word out, no force behind her voice. I waited for her to elaborate, but she seemed to be struggling to find the words.

"On?" I prompted.

Then, her voice returned with a vengeance as she wailed, "On what you heard!"

I was immediately by her side, taking her warm hands in mine. My stupid, selfish curiosity had caused Bella to become distressed. Her blush was overwhelming, however this time it was not so enticing to me, as it was.....upsetting.

"Don't be upset," I pleaded with her, trying to lock my gaze into hers. She tried to turn away from me, embarrassed no doubt by what I may have heard, but was helpless but to do anything than look into my eyes. Just as helpless as I was. I decided that the only way to allay her fear was to tell her what I had heard. After all, the coherent words that she had spoken whilst asleep were mostly innocent, and should not give her cause to be upset.

"You miss your mother," I whispered. Her eyes widened at my statement, and filled with moisture. "You worry about her. And when it rains, the sound makes you restless. You used to talk about home a lot, but it's less often now. Once you said, 'It's too GREEN.'" I laughed softly, trying not to offend or upset her further, by showing her that her inconsequential mutterings were nothing but harmless, innocent words.

Seemingly dissatisfied with my confession, she prodded me for more information. "Anything else?" she demanded. I knew what she wanted to know, and though my heart soared whenever I heard her speak my name in her sleep, I was somehow nervous about telling her considering her current state.

"You did say my name," I admitted.

She sighed heavily, her suspicions no doubt confirmed, and asked, "A lot?"

"How much do you mean by 'a lot' exactly?" I asked. I had not put an exact count on the number of times she had spoken my name, but it seemed common that during each night I visited, I was mentioned on more than one occasion.

Instead of giving me a number, she hung her head shamefully and said, "Oh no!"

Instinctively, I pulled her against my chest closely, her head naturally fitting into the hollow of my neck. It felt so right, so natural, so NORMAL to hold her that way.

"Don't be self-conscious," I whispered, my cool breath brushing against her ear as the hot apple of her cheek seared into my skin. "If I could dream at all, it would be about you. And I'm not ashamed of it," I admitted. As I held her, I closed my eyes briefly and fantasised. Ah, to be able to sleep on this very night, for even just one night out of the rest of eternity, and join Bella within that dreamlike state....now that would be something I would trade my very soul for...if I had one to give!

Our blissful embrace was broken by Charlie Swan's car approaching the driveway, the headlights shining upon us like a wake-up call as the car came to a stop, the door slamming. Bella stiffened in my arms, and I immediately knew that she had a problem with me being here when her father returned. I sighed lightly, realising that our day was now officially over, as her father approached the door, his emotional tenor being that of non-descript contentment. If only his thoughts were clearer! I stared at Bella and smiled, realising that she was her father's daughter, her father's mind being nearly as much of a mystery to me as hers.

"Should your father know I'm here?" I asked, knowing what her answer would be, but still hoping for the best.

Bella's eyes darted around the room, appearing to be panicked without the luxury of time to think. "I'm not sure...."

With that statement, I knew I needed to take my leave. Bella was obviously not ready to formally introduce me to her father. Not with that reaction.

"Another time then....." I whispered as I ghosted past Bella and made a hasty exit through the back door, avoiding any chance of running into Chief Swan.

"Edward!" she hissed, now beckoning me to return. Of course, I had no intention of returning whilst her father was in her company....but I wondered.....if her call would continue into the night....when she was alone and had time to think. Oh, dare I dream!

I chuckled at that very notion as I left, the noise of my laughter the last to leave the house as it reverberated and disappeared just in time for Chief Swan to turn the key and make his entrance through the front door.

As I exited the yard and made my way to the shadows, I decided in that instant that I could not leave Bella. Not yet. Not after all we had been through. With her scent gone, and only hints of it whispering around the perimeter of the property, I already began to feel a sense of loss in its absence. I now realised that my craving and addiction to Bella's scent was not only primal, but emotional, for if Bella's scent surrounded me, I knew that she was close by. Always. Ever. A sense of peace and tranquillity overwhelmed me at my realisation, the anxiety of being away from her following close behind.

As I stood in the shadows, the muffled thoughts of Chief Swan came to me, their tenor confused as Bella prepared his food and ate with him, talking about her day with such an obviously rushed fashion, that it would ensure that she would never become an actress. I smiled, suppressing a laugh as I realised Bella was flustered and in a hurry to be somewhere else....with me, I hoped more than anything.

I tried not to eavesdrop on their private moment, but something Chief Swan said alerted me. "In a hurry?"

"Yeah, I'm tired. I'm going to bed early," Bella responded as I heard her gulp her drink. Was she TRYING to make Chief Swan lock her up and throw away the key?

"You look kinda keyed up," he noted, an air of suspicion now at the forefront of his thoughts. Now it would be impossible for Bella to do anything but be patient, civil and NORMAL toward her father.

"Do I?" she replied in a high pitched, anxious voice as I heard the dishes clatter in the sink as she hurriedly washed them in order to make a hasty exit.

"It's Saturday. No plans for tonight?" Ah, this man was good. He knew that Bella tripped up easily when forced to lie, and now he was backing her slowly but surely into a corner.

"No Dad, I just want to get some sleep," she responded, her heart rate slowly rising with every word she spoke. I smiled at the thought of Chief Swan hooking Bella up to a lie detector test and how that test would fail miserably. Then, Chief Swan said something that made my fists clench and teeth grind.

"So, none of the boys in town your type eh?" he enquired, his tenor not of curiosity but still of suspicion.

"No, none of the boys have caught my eye yet," she responded, her heart indicating that she was on the verge of lying. Was she that ashamed of me? Or was this a ploy on her behalf to have me never revealed to her father as her love?

"I thought maybe that Mike Newton....you said he was friendly." Jealousy overwhelmed me for a brief moment, as the thought of THAT boy ever becoming part of Bella's world ate through me. If only Chief Swan knew of the vulgar thoughts that Mike had of his daughter! He would NEVER approve of him if he knew what I knew.

"He's JUST a friend, Dad," Bella argued quickly, to my relief. Though I knew she only cared for me, even her very mention of Mike made me feel frail. Weak. Human. Threatened.

Then the Chief said something that made me smile. "Well, you're too good for them all, anyway. Wait till you get into college to start looking."

"Sounds like a good idea to me," she agreed as I heard her footsteps head up the stairs.

"Night, honey," he called after her, his emotional tenor being one of pride, protection and unabated love. My heart swelled as each step brought her closer to me.

I deftly climbed the tree outside Bella's room and waited in my usual place. This time, though, tonight would be anything but the usual routine that I had come to know over these past weeks. On this night, there loomed the promise of something more. So much more. For now that Bella knew of my nightly visitations, and as I had no hope of them ever stopping, of course her nights of wakefulness in my company would become a significant part of my world. I wondered if her sleep talking would change now that she knew I would be there. My mind pondered as I waited for the sirens call....impatient as always....

**A/N: Had to end the chapter here.....it would have been too long if I continued to Edward's actual sleep over. That will follow in the next chapter! (That is if you review and let me know you want me to write it). Thanks!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Wow people! 24 reviews and an unbelievable response! Aww...you guys!! (She says, blushing). One more chappie just for you!! I don't know how many more I can write as I'm going insane with lack of time...three stories at once is just too many! I need to do more chapters in my novel! Boy, could I use a doppelganger to do all the boring stuff while I write and spend time with my family!**

**Once again my sincerest thanks go to my friend Totteacher (and my co-writer in arms hehehe). Watch out for our collaboration! I know, I'm such a tease! Edge of seat time peeps!**

**Disclaimer: As per usual I don't claim to own the Twilight characters. But I just can't stop myself from wondering what it would be like!**

EPOV

I sat in amongst the branches of the tree, the strength of them supporting me in my quest, Mother Nature cradling me in her arms as I gathered the fortitude to do what I was about to do. The leaves, partially obscuring my view into the window, rustled underneath me as I peered through the darkness, searching for my one safe haven. The safe haven of her soft, gentle arms.

"See you in the morning, Dad," she said, her steps torturing me with their laborious approach. As always, time dragged when I was apart from Bella Swan, and even though she was within a hairsbreadth of my grasp, my anxiety at the very thought of this ate away at me as I my body coiled with tension. I knew that it was an impossibility to be with her every moment of every day, though at the same time I feared to be apart from her now. I waited for the siren's call for what seemed an agonising amount of time, praying to the gods that the call would come. As I waited for Bella to reach the top of the stairs, I pondered as I tried to distract myself from leaping into the window uninvited, bereft of patience as I thought.

She was, without doubt in my mind now, my drug of choice. And, not just for the obvious reason. Her scent, though strong, was competing in my affections with her touch, her lips and her body. I loved everything about her completely and unwaveringly. I knew that I was beyond help to do anything about it, except cherish her for every waking moment, each and every day of my existence. The notes of my composition that had been forming in my mind all afternoon suddenly became sweet, so very tender and filled with emotion at the very thought of the goddess that waited beyond the fragile piece of glass. I sighed, trying to exhale the tension that I felt, leaving in its wake the elation of her increasing closeness to overwhelm me as I awaited my fate.

Without turning the light on, Bella entered her room and shut the door loudly, deliberately. If I had a heart it would be racing, as every step I heard her take, causing the floorboards beneath her to creak, made me gasp in exquisite but torturous anticipation. I held my breath as her steps finally brought her to her destination.

She opened the window with ease, no doubt aided by my recent escapades into her room. I finally heard the sweet call of my love, the one that I had been waiting my entire existence to hear. "Edward!" she whispered into the darkness, her restrained voice music to my ears as she leant out the window, her human vision unable to see what I was to do next.

Without hesitation I leapt through the window, blurring past her in an instant, the unencumbered anxiety rendering me unable to enter at human pace. I lay there on her welcoming bed, laughing as I did so in realisation that she had no idea that I was behind her, my joy at being in her company unabated. For a brief moment she stood staring out the window, her silhouette still in its glory, her pearly white skin angelically haunting in appearance.

"Yes?" I replied, my voice quietly alluring as I gazed at her beauty, causing Bella to whirl around to face me, her hand to her throat. Ah, that beautiful, soft, warm, tender throat, once the bane of my existence, was now at the very centre of my universe! I lazed on the bed's softness, her scent surrounding me from the covers enveloping me, with my hands behind my head and legs dangling over the edge.

"Oh," she breathed, her body sinking unsteadily to the floor. There was my Bella, her sense of unbalance once again charming me to the point of amusement.

"Sorry," I said, trying to stop myself from smirking.

Her breathing became rapid as her heart increased its pace in unison, drawing me in for a brief moment. "Just give me a minute to restart my heart," she gasped, her voice a forceless whisper.

So as not to startle her and elevate her thumping heart further, I sat up slowly, using incredible restraint as I leaned towards her. I reached out and took her upper arms in my hands, picking her up as carefully as if I were holding a child, and sat her on the bed beside me.

"Why don't you sit with me," I suggested caringly, as I took her incredibly warm hand in mine. The heat from her skin once again tingled through mine, the electricity nearly magnetic in its intensity. "How's the heart?" I asked, knowing full well that its pace had not slowed.

She looked at me with those knowing eyes as we sat there in the darkness. "You tell me – I'm sure you hear it better than I do."

I laughed quietly, my body shaking the bed as I did so. She knew me so well, and saw through everything like it was a clear, bottomless ocean. We sat there, our hands interlaced, waiting for her elevated heart rate to nestle back into its natural pace, her breathing soothing to my ears, turning my laughter silent.

"Can I have a minute to be human?" Bella asked of me, breaking the rhythm of her sweet breath.

"Certainly," I replied calmly, releasing my hand from hers and gesturing towards the door, knowing that the quicker she left, the quicker she would be in my company once again.

My thoughts became anxious at the idea of us parting briefly, but before I could linger on them, her eyes narrowed and she said, "Stay."

Did she honestly THINK that I was going anywhere? Wild horses were not going drag me away from my position! "Yes ma'am," I replied, tempted to salute her. Instead, I sat on the edge of the bed, still as a statue, following her order to the letter as I waited for her to leave the room.

She rose off the bed confidently, picking up some clothing off the floor and toiletries along the way and slipped outside the door, closing it gently behind her. I smiled. Why she would want to hide her perfect scent underneath that agglomeration of manmade products was beyond me. Of course, there was one exception. The scent of her strawberry shampoo seemed to compliment her natural scent beautifully, and the familiarity of it comforted me to no end.

I listened for movements, the bathroom door closing abruptly, causing Charlie Swan to gasp as he shifted in his familiar chair. His thoughts had returned to their previous tenor of suspicion, but yet he was comforted by the knowledge that Bella was close by. Though Bella had never expressed her affection toward him, nor he to her in so many words, Charlie's unwavering love for his daughter was interwoven with every thought process that his confounding mind mustered. It never ceased to amaze me. In his muffled dreams, when I would listen out for him on my visitations, thoughts of his daughter were never far away, even in the depths of slumber.

My mind wandered as I contemplated the depth of feeling that Charlie exuded and the special relationship that only existed between parent and child. I wondered what it would be like to selflessly give something back to the world that was uniquely part of oneself and the person one loved. For one to experience the unique love between father and child. To nurture that love and watch one's child grow, change and evolve. To hold a baby in one's arms for the very first time and never let go. All of those special gifts would be something to behold! My brows creased at the thought that I would never realise that dream. As my mind continued down its disturbing path, I realised that if Bella were to remain with me, that would be another in a very long list of sacrifices that she would have to make. Oh, how selfish I was!

Suddenly, Charlie's movement made me wary. I listened carefully, ready to make my hasty escape, as he headed for the front door. He exited the house, closing the door quietly behind him and crossed the yard hastily toward Bella's truck. I rose and peered through the window, his eyes darting around the yard as he walked. Of course, I immediately knew what he had planned. He opened the door, already unlocked due to my enthusiastic exit from the truck earlier, and opened the hood of the truck and leant in, detaching the battery cable. I shook my head and chuckled under my breath at his actions of futility as he gingerly tried to close the hood without calling attention to himself, crossing the yard back toward the house. If only he knew that the source of his concern was already waiting for his beautiful daughter in her room!

Just as I made this realisation, the bathroom door opened in synchronicity with Charlie Swan's arrival back into the house, where he rushed across the living room and sat in his familiar chair once again. I laughed silently at the theatrics taking place as I took my position back on the bed, mirroring the exact posture that I had held previously.

"Night, Dad," she called down the stairs towards her father, her steps taking her to the bottom of the staircase. I wondered why she was going to all the effort to make her father believe that she wasn't going anywhere. Her actions only seemed to make him more suspicious. Ah, if only he knew how close to the truth he was!

"Night, Bells," Charlie answered, a light panic in his tone, his breathing laboured, as Bella bounded up the stairs quickly and opened the bedroom door.

Then, she was there, in the darkness with me once again. She closed the door behind her, my stillness as part of her request still being played out. I could not help but break into a smile, relief washing over me upon her arrival, as my eyes took her in from the top of her freshly washed, damp hair to her flushed red face from the hot water that had bathed her beautiful skin. Then, my eyes arrived at the tattered shirt that graced her curves. She could have been wearing a potato sack and still would have embodied perfection. I raised my eyebrow at the very sight of her and said in approval, "Nice." Obviously taking my words and expression to be sarcastic, she grimaced. "No, it looks good on you," I added reassuringly, staring through the holes in the fabric that revealed unseen glimpses of her glorious skin.

Though I was uncertain as to whether or not she believed me, she whispered nervously, "Thanks." She immediately returned to my side and sat on the bed, her legs crossed, as she stared at the floor.

"What was all that about?" I asked of her, suppressing a smile at the cloak and dagger theatrics being orchestrated before me.

"Charlie thinks I'm sneaking out," she confirmed, perceptive as always.

I decided to play along, my curiosity of her thoughts always there. "Oh," I said. "Why?"

"Apparently I look a little overexcited," she answered, leaning in slightly, her heart rate increasing with her statement. Her words made my stomach burn as her scent hit my throat, the shampoo that she had used accentuating its flavour. I, too, was becoming somewhat overexcited. I studied the heat that was barely beneath her skin, the flush within each inch of what I could see enticing me to move closer. Not only did I have the reaction to her scent with my throat burning now, but my stomach also joined in, confusing me, much the same as it did when we kissed, but to a lesser degree. I did not understand what was happening, but, I was willing to go with it as long as it did not threaten her existence. She had, I reasoned, after all, survived our first kiss.

I took her chin in my hand and lifted her face to meet mine. "You look very warm, actually," I murmured, keeping my statement simple and non-threatening, the aching burn in my stomach increasing with each word I spoke. I bent my face into hers and placed my cheek on the heat of her face. Her skin felt so hot that it threatened to meld with mine. Bella held perfectly still, trying no doubt to assist me with the temptations that were surrounding me for the umpteenth time today.

"Mmmmm," I breathed, unable to put into words the feelings coursing through me.

"It seems to be....much easier for you, now, to be close to me," she muttered, her words nervously vibrating up through her throat and expelling from her sweet lips.

"Does it seem that way to you?" I murmured, gliding my nose to the corner of her jaw, my mouth and body craving more. My hand reached up and took her hair, gently brushing it aside to gain access to the soft hollow just below her ear. My lips touched there gently, her pulse and source of my battle just beneath the surface. I was slowly but surely losing myself in her intoxication, all the while the monster laughing at my weakness. In that moment I had decided. He was NEVER going to win, and though I knew this with certainty, I also knew that my other desires would need to be curbed to keep Bella safe, as much as I wanted more than anything to express them unhindered.

"Much much easier," she responded as she exhaled, her sweet breath enveloping me, once again rendering me speechless.

"Hmm," I agreed, somewhat moaning in response.

"So I was wondering," she continued as my fingers traced her collarbone, wanting more than anything for them to explore her further.

"Yes?" I breathed, waiting in anticipation as I tried to focus on her words, all the while her desirable skin calling to me.

"Why is that, do you think," she queried, her voice shaking, the burn in my stomach responding to her reaction of me.

I felt myself being swept away, and helpless to do anything about it, and laughed nervously and silently into her skin in response. "Mind over matter," I said logically, all the while fighting every urge, old and new, that now pulsated through my body.

Then it stopped. Just like that. Bella pulled back suddenly, and I froze once again, holding my breath, wondering if I had pushed things too far. I was, after all, exploring unchartered territory without a compass to guide me home.

"Did I do something wrong?" I questioned, gazing into her darkened eyes, hopeful that I had not overstepped her boundaries, still holding my breath.

"No - the opposite. You're driving me crazy," she explained, her heart reflecting her words. I exhaled as elation and surprise washed through me simultaneously at the very thought that I could cause that sort of response from Bella. And though her heart was always truthful, even when her words would not admit it, I was still chuffed to hear it nonetheless.

"Really?" I asked, wanting to hear her positive answer. Patience lacking, without waiting for her response I smiled triumphantly, realising that I had achieved yet another first in my life. I had elicited another VERY primal, human response from her, when I myself was anything but human.

Realising that my ego was becoming somewhat inflated yet again, Bella said sarcastically, "Would you like a round of applause?" I loved her so much. She was always finding new ways to amuse me.

Unable to wipe the widening grin off my face I clarified, teasingly, "I'm just pleasantly surprised. In the last hundred years or so, I never imagined anything like this. I never dreamed I would want to be with someone....in another way than my brothers and sisters." And that was yet another understatement. "And then to find, even though it's all new to me, that I'm good at it....at being with you...." The lustful feelings that had coursed through my body, fresh and new, made my heart soar, but at the same time scared me at their potential. If I was to lose control with Bella in any way, what then?

Bella brought me from my worrisome thoughts and interjected, pointing out, "You're good at everything."

I shrugged, ignoring her comment and laughed instead. This woman always brought out the best in me, even when I had no idea what that was.

"But how can it be so easy now? This afternoon...."

I sighed heavily, interrupting her. "It's not EASY." I knew I had to make her see how serious this was. How close I was to ending her. How potentially, that was still a possibility even after all we'd been through. I decided that honesty was best. "But this afternoon, I was still....undecided. I am very sorry about that, it was unforgiveable for me to behave so," I said apologetically, regretfully, my weakness laid bare once again.

"Not unforgiveable," Bella disagreed. Ah, I do not deserve this woman!

"Thank you," I said humbly, lowering my undeserving face. "You see, I wasn't sure if I was strong enough..." I hesitated and picked up one of her hands and pressed it to my face, my eyes rolling slightly in the process. "And while there was still that possibility that I might be – overcome..." I continued as my nose touched her wrist and I inhaled deeply, "I was susceptible."

I stared at her, releasing her hand and dropping it in her lap as I did so, trying to discern her thoughts as the burning within me continued. She seemed amazingly calm, considering the circumstances, her heart steady and true. I took the opportunity to clarify further. "Until I made up my mind that I WAS strong enough, that there was no possibility that I would....that I ever could....." I could not bring myself to tell her any more. The very thought of her blood on my hands, of her still lifeless body being an actuality, and me being the cause of it, was an unbearable concept. And, no longer an option.

"So there's no possibility now?" she asked.

"Mind over matter," I repeated, smiling so much that I bared my teeth at Bella.

Once again, Bella did not respond to my actions and said casually, "Well that was easy."

Was she KIDDING? In response, I threw my head back and laughed quietly but exuberantly, her words so comical that I had no choice but to respond in that way.

"Easy for you!" I exclaimed correcting her statement, touching my ice cold finger to the tip of her nose to accentuate my point, my face suddenly serious. "I'm trying," I whispered, the pain of admitting that I may not be able to endure her company overwhelming me. "If it gets to be...too much, I'm fairly sure I will be able to leave."

Bella scowled at me, no doubt upset by the fact that I was conceding defeat somewhat. I felt the same way. The very thought of me leaving her, even for one day, let alone an eternity would be heart shattering.

"And it would be harder tomorrow," I continued. "I've had your scent in my head all day, and I've grown amazingly desensitised. If I'm away from you for any length of time, I'll have to start over again. Not quite from scratch, though, I think."

Then, Bella said something that I longed for. "Don't go away then," she said seductively, her voice liquid in its tenor, each word bringing me immediate relief.

I smiled and said, "That suits me fine. Bring on the shackles – I'm your prisoner," I joked, my unabated laughter threatening to alert Charlie of my presence, my hands forming manacles around her slender wrists as my body shook.

"You seem more...optimistic than usual," Bella stated. "I haven't seen you like this before," she added.

SHE hadn't seen me like this? NEITHER HAD I! I smiled, my body thrumming with electricity at the thought of what I was to say next.

"Isn't it supposed to be like this? The glory of first love, and all that. It's incredible, isn't it, the difference between reading about something, seeing it in pictures, and experiencing it?" I had once again indirectly declared my love for Bella. I waited for her response, which was casual and accepting.

"Very different," Bella agreed. "More forceful than I'd imagined." I wondered if I would ever be privileged enough to hear those three simple words escape her lips. That, I mused, would obviously have to wait for another time.

Just like that, my stomach suddenly tied itself in knots momentarily as Charlie's thoughts pulled me in another direction. He was thinking of Mike Newton once again, and though I could not make out the detail, he was curious about Mike. I wondered if Charlie would ever be curious about me and whether he would ever know and accept me as part of his daughter's life. This was another among the thousands of reasons I wished I were human. My mind wandered back to the very first time I had these unfamiliar, unpleasant feelings, my voice articulating my emotions as I spoke.

"For example, the emotion of jealousy. I've read about it a hundred thousand times, seen actors portray it in a thousand different plays and movies. I believed I understood that one pretty clearly. But it shocked me," I admitted as I grimaced, the pain in my voice obvious. "Do you remember the day that Mike asked you to the dance?"

Bella nodded and said, "The day you started talking to me again."

I was pleased that my talking to her was what she remembered about that day, rather than the fact that that BOY had asked her out on a date. "I was surprised by the flare of resentment, almost fury, that I felt – I didn't recognise what it was at first. I was even more aggravated than usual that I couldn't know what you were thinking, why you refused him. Was it simply for your friend's sake? Was there someone else? I knew I had no right to care either way. I TRIED not to care," I conceded.

"And then, the line started to form," I added, chuckling at the thought of Bella's seductive impact on the male population of Forks High School. And, in turn, the impact she had on me.

In response, Bella scowled. Of course she did not appreciate the fact that I was trying to tell her how very desirable she was to the opposite sex. I, on the other hand, felt nothing but privileged that she chose me to be in her esteemed company out of all the other human boys that she could have, and probably SHOULD have, selected.

"I waited, unreasonably anxious to hear what you would say to them, to watch your expressions. I couldn't deny the relief I felt, watching the annoyance on your face. But I couldn't be sure." Nothing relieved me more than watching her diplomatically turn each boy down as they asked, but I still wondered why.

I remembered the uncertainty and frustration I felt, not knowing Bella's thoughts, and how I needed more than anything to figure them out. "That was the first night I came here. I wrestled all night while watching you sleep, with the chasm between what I knew was RIGHT, moral, ethical, and what I WANTED. I knew that if I continued to ignore you as I should, or if I left for a few years, till you were gone, that someday you would say yes to Mike, or someone like him. It made me angry," I said reflectively, the tug-of-war that was going on within me between my selfishness and doing the right thing, raw within my heart. Then, it all disappeared when I recalled why I was still here. Why I had not abandoned Bella, and why she had not chosen Mike.

"And then," I whispered, "As you were sleeping, you said my name. You spoke so clearly, at first I thought you'd woken. But you rolled over restlessly and mumbled my name once more, and sighed. The feeling that coursed through me then was unnerving, staggering. And I knew I couldn't ignore you any longer."

At my cathartic words of admission, telling Bella about her sleep talking caused her heart to pick up its pace unevenly again. I surmised that she may have felt awkward or embarrassed. I, on the other hand, felt elated that her thoughts had finally broken through to me in her slumber, and if I had a beating heart, it too would be thudding in this moment.

"But jealousy....it's a strange thing. So much more powerful than I would have thought. And irrational!" I added, feeling somewhat irrational at my words, as thoughts of Mike entered my mind once again. "Just now, when Charlie asked you about that vile Mike Newton..." I said in anger, unable to finish my words without seething, my teeth clenching as I gripped her hands infinitesimally tighter.

"I should have known you'd be listening," Bella groaned accusingly.

"Of course," I replied matter-of-factly. Most times I had no choice BUT to hear distant conversations, blended with thoughts, and though I was quite proficient at blocking them out, Bella's conversations were the exception to my rule.

"THAT made you feel jealous, though, really?" she asked, confusion and amusement in her eyes.

I loved the fact that we were both experiencing a wide gamut of feelings all at once. It seemed that way between us always, and though it was unpredictable, I loved the fact that many of these feelings which were buried deep within, were brought to the surface by Bella Swan.

"I'm new at this, you're resurrecting the human in me, and everything feels strong because it's fresh."

"But honestly," Bella teased, "For that to bother you, after I have to hear that Rosalie – Rosalie, the incarnation of pure beauty, ROSALIE was meant for you. Emmett or no Emmett, how can I compete with that?"

"There's no competition," I stated factually, as I smiled and took her hands and pulled them behind my back and held them there, showing Bella how true my words were as I drew her to my chest. In response, Bella remained still again, her breaths shallow and cautious. She was, once again, thinking of me in her reaction. Selfless through and through.

Her hot, sweet breath enveloped the hard skin of my chest as she mumbled, "I KNOW there's no competition. That's the problem!"

She did not see herself clearly. THAT was obvious. I needed to make her see herself as I did. Oh how I wish there were a mirror that I could place before her, which somehow revealed her true beauty to her, inner and outer! I, instead, would just have to settle for being very convincing.

I gazed into her eyes, serious, and said, "Of course Rosalie is beautiful in her way, but even if she wasn't like a sister to me, even if Emmett didn't belong with her, she could never have one tenth, no, one hundredth of the attraction you hold for me." I needed to let Bella know in no uncertain terms that NO-ONE could hold a candle to her. Nor, in a hundred years of my existence had there ever been nor would ever be, anyone that would take my heart so. "For almost ninety years I've walked among my kind, and yours....all the time thinking I was complete in myself," I said. Oh, how wrong I was! "Not realising what I was seeking. And not finding anything, because you weren't alive yet," I finished. Though I was not a believer in kismet in the past, once Bella came into my existence, everything changed. My life finally began. I squeezed her hands gently in mine, which were still behind my back, immersing myself in the comforting arms of my safe haven as I did so.

"It hardly seems fair," she whispered against my skin, her face pressing further against the bare skin of my chest near the opening of my shirt, her burning ear making the most contact. I shivered, my breaths heaving cautiously as her words seeped from her tongue. My thoughts digressed once again as I felt her skin on mine, my fantasies of more skin on skin contact at the forefront. Then, she added, "I haven't had to wait at all. Why should I get off so easily?"

"You're right," I agreed with amusement, trying to suppress my lustful feelings, "I should definitely make this harder for you," I continued as I smiled, taking both of her hands into one of mine, running the free one through her strawberry scented, damp hair, down her spine and to her waist, wanting nothing more than to forcefully clutch her to me. I felt goose bumps lift beneath her clothing as my hand gently stroked her, longing for more contact. The electricity flowed between us relentlessly as her scent entered my nostrils. The risk was there once again, joining in with the lust, making her breakable in so many more ways.

"You only have to risk your life every second you spend with me, that's surely not much. You only have to turn your back on nature, on humanity.....what's that worth?" I questioned.

"Very little. I don't feel deprived of anything," she responded predictably.

"Not yet," I responded, disgusted with myself for once again thinking selfishly. For denying Bella human experiences that I could never offer her. WHY could she not see that? Bella tried to withdraw from me, but I held her wrists in my hand still, gripping them tightly as I tried to silently will her to agree with me. Just as I did that, I heard movement from the chair downstairs, its springs squeaking slowly as Charlie got up and switched off the television, approaching the bottom of the stairs.

"What..." Bella began to say, my mind on full alert, trying to read Charlie's muffled thoughts. The tenor of them led me to one conclusion. He was still suspicious of Bella, but also tired and wanted to go to bed. I knew he would head for her room to check on her before he retired, to ensure that she had not already made her escape.

As he took the first step up, I released my hold of her and in a blur, headed to the darkest corner behind the bedroom door. "Lie down," I hissed. I was surprised as I watched Bella, suddenly confused that I wasn't there, immediately comply and cover herself with her quilt, rolling over to her familiar favourite sleeping position. The door opened slowly and he peered through at her, watching his daughter silently as she lay in her bed. Once again, the love poured out of him as he watched her breathe in an over-exaggerated manner, not picking up on the fact that she was pretending to be asleep. Guilt and relief overwhelmed him for a brief moment as he thought about his jumping to the wrong conclusion. After over two minutes, he retreated and closed the door quietly, heading toward his room, his steps slow and weary as his feet dragged on the floor. I knew that he was moments away from falling asleep.

Being careful to be as silent as possible so as not to draw Charlie back to her room, I spirited myself over to the bed and slipped underneath the covers, draping my arm over the warmth of her waist. I placed my cool lips to her ear and finally said, "You are a terrible actress – I'd say that career path is out for you."

"Darn it," Bella muttered, causing me to smile as her heart began to race once again. I felt cocooned by her as her scent permeated from her skin, pillow and quilt. I was surrounded, and could not be more content, causing my composition to involuntarily escape my lips, Bella hearing it for the first time. I knew immediately what it was. Its sweetness only led me conclude that it was a lullaby. A lullaby made just for her. Only her. It was apt, considering that some of my most insightful moments with Bella occurred whilst she slept. And now, I had something that was a tangible celebration of that fact.

I paused and asked, "Should I sing you to sleep?"

Bella laughed and replied, "Right. Like I could sleep with you here!"

"You do it all the time," I reminded her, thinking about how many nights I had watched her in slumber, her beauty not quelled by the darkness as small parts of her mind were revealed to me.

"But I didn't KNOW you were here," she replied abruptly.

"So if you don't want to sleep..." I queried innocently, her breath catching as I spoke. I swallowed quietly, trying to clear my throat without her noticing my jangling nerves.

"If I don't want to sleep?" she mimicked, her anticipation tangible as she waited for my answer.

I chuckled nervously and asked, "What do you want to do then?"

Suddenly I felt awkward as I waited for her answer, as awkward as a seventeen year old boy would be in the company of a girl, wondering what we could do together safely. As much as I didn't want to admit it, my long forgotten human frailties and urges were driving my thoughts. Thoughts that any hormonal boy would have, but with one significant difference. I could kill her with one errant and poorly controlled touch.

Bella hesitated, and I NEEDED TO KNOW HER THOUGHTS AND NEEDED TO KNOW THEM NOW!!

"I'm not sure," she finally replied. Perhaps, I surmised, she was feeling the same teen awkwardness that I was, and even though I had more to consider, she was seemingly, once again, in synch with my feelings.

"Tell me when you decide," I responded, giving her the power, within reasonable boundaries, as to what we could be doing. With those words easing me somewhat, I leant in to her neck, slid my nose along her jaw, imbibing her completely, the burn relentless within my throat, stomach and bones.

"I thought you were desensitised," Bella commented, as she felt my intake of her. Of course, I was to some extent, but as she was my drug of choice, I could not help but sample her whenever the opportunity arose.

"Just because I'm resisting the wine doesn't mean I can't appreciate the bouquet," I whispered as I immersed myself once again. "You have a very floral smell, like lavender.....or freesia. It's mouth-watering," I commented, knowing that Bella's scent would put any flower to shame in comparison.

"Yeah, it's an off day when I don't get SOMEONE telling me how edible I smell," she responded with humour.

I chuckled in response, then sighed. It's not exactly common for a person to have to worry about how edible they smell, I mused.

"I've decided what I want to do," she said as my stomach tightened in anticipation. "I want to hear more about you," she added, my relief of her innocent question palpable.

"Ask me anything," I replied automatically.

"Why do you do it? I still don't understand how you can work so hard to resist what you....ARE." I was relieved now more than ever that I did choose my lifestyle in that moment, for if I was like most of the vampire population, we would not be having this conversation. As if Bella could read my mind, she explained, "Please don't misunderstand, of course I'm glad that you do. I just don't see why you bother in the first place."

I hesitated, trying to articulate an answer that would not frighten her. "That's a good question, and you are not the first one to ask it." The Volturi were synonymous with asking it of Carlisle each and every chance they could once he had chosen his lifestyle. Other vampires, mere nomads and many of them no better than feral animals, also had the gall to question it of us when we came across them. "The others – the majority of our kind who are quite content with their lot – they, too, wonder at how we live. But you see....just because we have been....dealt a certain hand, it doesn't mean we can't choose to rise above – to conquer the boundaries of a destiny that none of us wanted. To try to retain whatever essential humanity we can."

Bella lay there in my embrace, her breathing even and sweet, as I sensed her taking in everything I had said. She, more than any other human in existence, understood and accepted my struggles. I loved her so much for that.

Her breathing deepened, and as her eyes closed, her body began to relax. "Did you fall asleep?" I whispered after a few minutes of silence, of me listening to her heart, her breaths.

"No," she replied quietly, surprising me as her eyes opened, her mind fighting her weariness.

"Is that all you were curious about?" I asked of Bella, trying to keep the conversation flowing in an innocent direction.

"Why can you read minds – why only you? And Alice seeing the future.....why does that happen?"

Ah, yes, the question that had been plaguing the minds of my family for a century. I shrugged my shoulders as I replied, "We don't really know. Carlisle has a theory....he believes that we all bring something of our strongest human traits with us into the next life, where they are intensified – like our minds, and our senses. He thinks that I must have already been very sensitive to the thoughts of those around me. And that Alice had some precognition, wherever she was."

"What did he bring into this life, and the others?"

"Carlisle brought his compassion. Esme brought her ability to love passionately. Emmett brought his strength, Rosalie her....tenacity. Or you could call me pigheadedness," I added, chuckling at the very thought of my, shall we say, dominating, overbearing sister. "Jasper was very interesting. He was quite charismatic in his first life, able to influence those around him to see things his way. Now he able to manipulate the emotions of those around him – calm down a room full of angry people for example, or excite a lethargic crowd, conversely. It's a very subtle gift," I said smiling, thinking back to the fact that Jasper had already used his gift on Bella without her knowledge.

Bella thought for a moment, and as she did I wondered if she knew about Jasper already having an influence on her, and if its intensity impacted a human any differently than a vampire.

"So where did it all start? I mean Carlisle changed you, and then someone must have changed him, and so on..." her voice curious. Now we were getting into the sensitive subject of human religious beliefs, versus scientific fact, versus little known vampire legend, the latter challenging so much of the former.

"Well, where did you come from? Evolution? Creation? Couldn't we have evolved the same as other species, predator and prey? Or, if you don't believe that all of this world could have just happened on its own, which is hard for me to accept myself, is it so hard to believe that the same force that created the delicate angelfish with the shark, the baby seal with the killer whale, could create both our kinds together?"

Rather than argue about science versus religion, Bella surprised me once again. "So I'm the baby seal right?" she asked of me, her acceptance of being prey to the very real vampire predator nearly comical.

"Right," I agreed as I pressed my lips to her hair, kissing her lightly, wishing nothing more than to touch my lips to hers once again. Her silence made me wonder what she was thinking, and if it was the same as me.

"Are you ready to sleep? Or do you have any more questions?" I asked, trying to either get Bella to sleep, or to keep her conversing civilly.

"Only a million or two," she responded as she suppressed a yawn.

"We have tomorrow, and the next day and the next...." I reminded Bella, overjoyed at the very prospect of being in her company each and every day. She smiled in response, her euphoria contagious.

"Are you sure you won't vanish in the morning?" Bella asked. Was she KIDDING? "I mean, you are mythical after all," she added.

"I won't leave you," I promised with solemnity, realising Bella needed me as much as I did her. I had to make her feel secure in that I would always be there for her, save me living in some sort of endless, pointless purgatory.

Her heart fluttered as she responded, "One more then..." as she blushed red, her cheeks black in their appearance in the darkness, their heat exquisite, the burning igniting in me once again.

"What is it?" I asked, needing to know what thoughts she would have to entice such a reaction in her body, and for that matter in mine.

"No forget it. I changed my mind," she replied flippantly, dismissively. Was she TRYING to drive me crazy?

Attempting to keep calm enough to extract her thoughts from her, I offered, "Bella, you can ask me anything."

She did not answer, causing me to groan in frustration. "I keep thinking it will get less frustrating, not hearing your thoughts. But it just gets worse and WORSE," I complained.

She sighed in what seemed relief and said, "I'm glad you can't read my thoughts. It's bad enough that you eavesdrop on my sleep talking." I wondered if my invasion of her privacy had a negative effect on her. I was so used to unavoidably invading everyone's privacy, vampire and human alike, that I sometimes forgot what it must be like for those around me to want to keep some things private. However, my situation being unavoidable, I still needed to know her question.

"If you don't tell me, I'll just assume it's something much worse than it is," I threatened. "Please?" I begged.

Bella shook her head emphatically, the redness in her cheeks not fading.

"Well," she began nervously. This was going to be like extracting teeth.

My impatience getting the better of me I pressed, "Yes?"

"You said that Rosalie and Emmett will get married soon...." she hesitated. "Is that...marriage....the same as it is for humans?" Oh, for the love of....!

My laughter, though soft so as not to disturb the now snoring Charlie Swan, was exuberant once again. "Is THAT what you're getting at?"

Bella fidgeted, not answering me, no doubt due to embarrassment.

"Yes, I suppose it is much the same. I told you, most of those human desires are there, just hidden behind more powerful desires," I explained as if I were a teacher in a health class, trying not to embarrass students on the subject matter, trying to make Bella feel more at ease. Trying to make me feel more at ease just as much.

"Oh," she responded.

"Was there a purpose behind your curiosity?" I asked before thinking, my teenage feelings once again kicking in.

"Well, I did wonder....about you and me....someday...." she said, her voice trailing off, waiting for me to fill in the blanks. Now we had finally arrived at the toughest of questions. The question of how far our physical relationship could go. Ever. Reflexively, my body froze once again as I remembered the feelings coursing through me when we kissed. If THAT was my reaction with a mere kiss, how could I be certain of anything but disaster occurring if we were to express our feelings further than that? In the throes of passion, how could I guarantee anything?

"I don't think that....that....would be possible for us," I conceded, my mind scattering in a thousand different directions at the same time. One thing became crystal clear though, rising to the surface above my selfish desires being unfulfilled. This was yet another sacrifice Bella would have to make to be with me!

"Because it would be too hard for you, if I were that....close?" she asked, her curiosity unabated.

"That's certainly a problem. But that's not what I was thinking of. It's just that you are so soft, so fragile. I have to mind my actions every moment that we're together so that I don't hurt you. I could kill you quite easily, Bella, simply by accident," I murmured softly, seriously, mournfully. I moved my hand to the softness of her cheek, caressing it gently within my fingers and said, "If I was too hasty, if for one second I wasn't paying enough attention, I could reach out, meaning to touch your face, and crush your skull by mistake. You don't realise how incredibly BREAKABLE you are. I can never, never afford to lose any kind of control when I'm with you."

The silence was there for a moment, all the while my patience wearing thin. "Are you scared?" I asked, wondering if she feared any of what I had told her, the anxiety balling into the pit of my stomach.

I waited for Bella to respond, no doubt she was thinking of what sacrifices she would have to make to be with me. Nothing.

"No, I'm fine," she finally replied, somewhat truthfully, though I wondered what her hesitation meant. She was hiding her feelings from me yet again, and yet again I knew it was for my sake. After all, she was a normal, hormonal human girl with feelings just as anyone her age would have. Did I have the right to expect her to forgo EVERYTHING about being human? Forsaking her instincts just because mine were more sinister? I was no better than a schoolyard bully, frightening everyone around me into submission. Ah, how unbelievably selfish I was! How undeserving Bella was of this!! Then, my mind digressed. I wondered EXACTLY selfish I was being. Was I denying her of experiences that she had already had with another?

"I'm curious now though. Have you ever...." I asked suggestively, trying to find out how much more experienced Bella was than I was.

I knew the answer was truthful the moment it left her lips, preceded by a blush. "Of course not. I told you I've never felt like this about anyone before, not even close."

"I know," I responded, feeling the same way as she did. "It's just that I know other people's thoughts. I know love and lust don't always keep the same company."

Before I could blink, she responded, "They do for me. Now anyway, that they exist for me at all." Bella sighed in response, her sweet breath reaching for me like flames gathering in the nearest moth.

I replied in satisfaction, "That's nice. We have that one thing in common, at least." Then, Bella pressed the issue further, trying to eke out my inner most thoughts.

"Your human instincts...." she began, as I waited for her to finish. "Well, do you find me attractive, in THAT way, at all?" WAS. SHE. KIDDING...??????

I burst out laughing, and at that moment Charlie snorted in his sleep as I lightly ruffled her flaming hair, strawberry fumes filling the warm air underneath the quilt.

"I may not be human, but I am a man," I replied calmly, wearing my heart on my sleeve as much as I would allow it.

Bella yawned at the moment, comforted somewhat by my response. It was time for my love to get her rest, and for me to watch her. The anxiety of finding out what she would say as she slept tonight made my stomach flip and burn in unison, the nerves and desire for her just beneath the surface.

"I'm not sure if I can," she replied lazily.

"Do you want me to leave?" I offered weakly, not wanting to BUDGE from here.

"No!" she cried loudly as Charlie stopped breathing momentarily and stirred, his mind entering a muffled dream about water.

I laughed, and then set about the task at hand. Giving my Bella her rest, her slumber, her peace and, for that matter, mine. I hummed Bella's Lullaby sweetly, my notes perfect in their tone and volume, her breathing becoming relaxed and even as she sighed into me. Thoughts of comfort and assurance surrounded me as finally, my angel drifted to sleep in my cold, lifeless arms, and I waited for her to reveal herself to me once again........

**A/N: Oh well, it seems that the chapter would be too long if I added in what she says in this chapter...oh and when Edward sneaks off home to get changed...heheh...you may have to wait. However, if you don't ask for another chapter people, you don't get...get my drift? LOL.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I'm very humbled by your responses to my story. It keeps me going folks! Please don't forget to let me know how this chapter is, as this one is the most imaginative so far, and has taken the most time to write (because I kept changing my mind!) So do me a favour and put me out of my misery LOL!**

****STORY ALERT** Ever wondered how Alice was changed and want to know the real story behind her mysterious background and what led her to being a part the Cullen family? Totteacher and I are co-writing this very story and have posted 2 chapters already! Look out for the title "Within These Walls". We'd love to know what you think!! REMEMBER – REVIEWS KEEP US WRITING THE NEXT CHAPTER!**

**Disclaimer: Ho hum! I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. That honour belongs to Stephenie Meyer. WAAAAAHHH!**

EPOV

I stared at Bella closely, examining every intake of breath as her chest rose and fell, her heart thudding slowly and evenly, beating truly for me and only me. I pondered the last twenty four hours. In my near century of existence this one day and night had a more profound effect on my world than all of my witnessed sunsets combined. I was one lucky man. And now? Now I was experiencing the first night of the rest of my life, fresh and new, with the promise of a better tomorrow. This night was the first night of many that I would spend in this familiar home, holding her in her bed, finally an invited guest. I was a man in love and could not be happier.

As Bella lay in my arms, her sweet even breaths hypnotic in their wake, I felt her shiver under the covers. I knew that I was the cause of her reaction and wondered what it felt like on her behalf to hold something so cold, hard and inanimate, when I, on the other hand, experienced nothing but the best of everything that this unique human had to offer. Her warmth and the softness of her giving, velvet skin against my cold hard outer shell felt like nothing on earth. Fire against ice, one somehow nullifying the other, bringing together a once in a lifetime uniqueness in its polarity - every opposing element fighting to dominate the other, yet somehow when united, creating the perfect symphony. A symphony that had swirled its way through my mind which, in turn, had inspired Bella's Lullaby. I sighed as I realised that Bella had certainly gotten the wrong end of the bargain in this transaction!

My mind wandered back to the feeling of her lips against mine. The softness, the taste, the warm, slick wetness all served to drive this vampire beyond the realms of rational thought! And her exquisite reaction! I could never have predicted, nor wished for anything beyond how she responded to me on this most auspicious day. There would have to be some way of celebrating our newly established bond, though nothing I considered seemed to be enough. This one day out of thousands so insignificant would forever be burned into my psyche.

She shivered once more. Ever so reluctantly, I released my arm from her waist and pulled the covers away, creating a barrier between us as I rolled on top of the quilt and wrapped the covers around her relaxed body, embracing her once again. As I did this, she moaned and moved her head to the edge of the goose down pillow, her body edging towards mine as she did so, until I felt her snuggle into me, like a satellite needing the earth's gravitational pull to function. I knew how she felt. I was constantly being drawn to this woman. Her movements served to run small shocks through my skin, even through the quilt that divided us, yet again stirring the burning sensation in my stomach. I would have to discuss these new feelings with Carlisle. They confounded me to no end! I smiled as I grazed my eyes over every part of her face, watching, waiting for her to fall into the level of sleep that I craved. The level that opened up her mysterious mind to me ever so slightly, allowing me glimpses of her mind's inner workings.

I thought about our time together. How things can change to such a degree still filled me with awe. For this fragile, human woman to understand the very essence of me, to accept me without hesitation or doubt even when every other human on this planet would shy away to the point of being petrified, left me unable to think coherently at times. I wondered if the fact that her mind was shrouded in mystery as far as my reading her thoughts was concerned had anything to do with it. Perhaps this same anomaly clouded her mind from my very horrific and dark nature as well. I didn't care. The whys and wherefores mattered not. All that mattered was the here and now. She belonged with me. SHE. WAS. MINE. My heart burst at the prospect of a possible future with this most delicate of creatures, my possessive, nearly animalistic nature running amuck.

The darkness fell upon us even deeper as the clouds in the inked sky began to thicken, though no human eyes could ever discern the difference. The moonless night, already pitch black, seemed to cover us like a thick blanket and my exceptional visual abilities barely discerned the difference as it was. I smiled at the thought of a cloudy day tomorrow. I hoped that it would be so, giving me more freedom to take Bella wherever I pleased. Then again, it mattered not where we went, as long as I was in her company.

As my eyes took in her plump lips, I wondered when I would be brave enough to kiss Bella again. Our first kiss had been earth shattering, her reaction fragmenting every part of my resolve until there was nothing left but pure, unadulterated emotion and need. I knew that any physical contact would be of risk, but I was curious as to what we could achieve. We had achieved far more than I ever imagined possible up until now, and this thought gave me hope to dream.

As I cocooned her in my arms, Bella's even breathing was intermingled with Charlie's, as if they were in concert together, each breath in harmony with the other. Then, her body stiffened. I released my grasp to allow her to move unhindered, not wanting to disturb her slumber. Her head shook from side to side, tousling her hair as she moved, her brows creasing in concentration. I wondered what she was dreaming about as the tension in her body seemed to increase with every shake of her head. I also wondered what adventures her mind was taking her on as I watched and listened.

"Edward, where are you?" she muttered. "Come back, I can't keep up. The forest is too green," she continued, her voice mumbling as her legs twitched. Ah, she was dreaming about our day together. Then, she laughed. "You stop that Edward!" I wondered what I had done to make her laugh so heartily, her body shaking with laughter one she muttered the words. I listened for sounds of Charlie stirring. His breaths did not lose the rhythm for one second. I grinned. This was getting interesting.

"No hunting rabbits!" she exclaimed. I chuckled, trying to stop myself from laughing loudly, afraid I would disturb her during this most interesting, senseless dream. "Let's just hunt for flowers. They love you Edward. Edward...I love you Edward. The flowers love you too." I lay there still, shocked, elated and gobsmacked. She had said she loved me!! Then again, she had also said the flowers loved me. I waited, holding my breath, for what she was to say next.

"Mmmm.....Edward," she said in a throaty almost lyrical voice, her desire trickling from her mouth as she spoke. She moved in closer, so close that her scent surrounded me, my stomach and throat burning in celebration as her hot breath hit the skin at the nape of my neck. I bent my head down studied her face intently to ascertain that she was still asleep. She was. My eyes rolled in ecstasy, as I threw my head back, her declaration and her scent all too much to withstand. "I love you so much, my Edward," she said, her voice low and punctuated with rich tones, like liquid amber, every word melting off her tongue and blazing into my mind, forever trapped within its confines.

My body began to tremble in reaction, the burning intensifying and increasing as her heart began to thud out of control, the sheen of her sweat glistening across her brow, her panting breaths shallow and rapid. I wanted more than anything to tear off the covers and clasp her body to mine, kissing her like it was our last day alive. "Kiss me," she moaned silkily, her voice enough to tip me over a very precarious edge.

Without thought of the consequences, I leant in closely and closed my eyes, touching her sweet lips to mine. Her restful slumber meant that she did not respond as she had in the meadow. My lips touched her warmth like a moth lightly beating its wings against a delicate rose petal, the burning within me there to a lesser degree as she inhaled. "Mmmm," I moaned quietly as I breathed between her slightly parted lips, enraptured in the moment as she sighed, her breath invading me along with the burning.

I felt exultant, yet at the same time guilty for taking advantage of her while she slept. As I withdrew from her reluctantly but deliberately, I immediately knew that this kiss would have to be my guarded secret. Then again, I mused, this was the safest way to allow myself to see how much control I could muster without a certain Miss Swan losing hers. I decided that I had passed with flying colours, all the while the slow burn eating through me, partnered with the guilt. A secret it would remain.

Her words blurred into incoherency as she breathed heavily and smiled, her reaction in keeping with our unique kiss. Wave after wave of unleashed excitement now coursed through me. Once again, Bella's mind had revealed itself to me uncensored, and what I had uncovered on this most glorious of evenings was more than I would or ever could fantasise about. I stared at my love, the adoration pouring out of me like an untapped resource that had suddenly found release. I had never felt so truly and completely alive! I was alive! I did not just exist any longer!! I had a meaningful reason to LIVE, Bella giving me such a plethora of wonderful gifts today that it exceeded anything which could be gained monetarily.

I listened to her delicious heart, its rhythm slowing as she fell deeper, her eyes moving rapidly underneath her near translucent eyelids. Her breathing deepened in kind, and I knew that her sleep talking was ended, for now. Though at this juncture, I didn't care. No other words spoken in a thousand dreams on a thousand nights could improve upon what I had heard within this one fragment of time tonight. I smiled and reflected on the cathartic experience that I had been through today. I was so curious about everything, questions racing through my mind one after the other, never finding an answer, and so round and round they went. I needed to talk to Carlisle about today and try to gain insight into my feelings. That, I hoped, would then assist me with keeping Bella alive. If I set ground rules, following them to the letter, and kept to them no matter the temptation, that would keep my Bella's heart beating for years to come.

Reluctantly, I released my embrace of Bella and left her bed, knowing that it was important to talk to Carlisle about today's events so that tomorrow we could establish with no uncertainty what would be allowable for every day beyond. For what I knew now more than ever was that I needed to tread this path that I had chosen with care, love and a thorough knowledge of what possible consequences our continued relationship could produce.

I stood and stared at Bella, reluctant to leave her as her scent surrounded me. It had surrounded me all day and into this evening, with no spring breeze to temper its effects. Her scent though still mouth-wateringly appealing like no other, had somehow changed in its appeal, my animalistic urges changing with it. As much as my body desired to taste her blood, it was now more attuned to tasting her skin, her lips, and THAT desire overrode the thirst. This gave me a sense of relief on one hand, however on the other I still needed to talk to Carlisle about my ever-evolving feelings. I did not want to become arrogant about the very real risk that my being with Bella Swan posed every moment that I was in her company. Ever.

"I love you Bella," I said sweetly below my breath as I climbed out the window and jumped to the ground, the soft thud under my feet barely audible. As I walked past Bella's truck, I smiled, remembering what Charlie had done, his actions of futility amusing me so. I made my way to the edge of the forest and looked back once more towards the home, understated and small, its outward appearance belying its majesty and significance in my mind.

I approached the edge of the forest and began to run. The freedom and release that I felt on this particular run was to exceed any other run I had felt to this day. I instantaneously corrected myself. This was the best run I had experienced ALONE. Of course, there was one other run that could never be improved upon. When I had carried Bella on my back for the first time, her body heat cocooning me, thousands of feelings had raced through my dormant body. I smiled, my breathing even as my legs blurred over the long grass, the ground beneath butter under my tread. The forest touched my skin, caressing it, Mother Nature my only solace as I ran, her nurturing arms rocking me in her arms like a new born child. I was truly blessed.

As I slowed to a leisurely pace when I approached my home, every light seemed to be switched on within it, like a welcoming beacon that lay beyond a stormy sea. I hoped that I would be greeted by the occupants just as welcomingly. Doubt raced through my mind as to the broad range of feelings that each member of my family had expressed over my pursuit of Bella Swan. Everything from the suggestion of killing her and getting it over with, to disgust, to embattled acceptance and finally love for the decisions I had taken had torn into me, making my actions though unchangeable, still torturous in their accomplishment.

I needed my family to be a united front regarding Bella more than ever. And though I did not require everyone's blessing, I wanted Bella to be a part of my world. Every part. It was more for Bella that I wanted this, and not so much for me. She came from a broken home. Her father, her only soft place to fall at this time, was all she had. Her mother, though seemingly kind and loving, had a life to lead, and though it was Bella's decision to put distance between herself and Renee, I knew that it still had a profound effect on her. Her dreams and sleep talking on my early visitations had only served to prove my theory correct. I hoped that somehow Esme might help fill a need in Bella's heart that I suspected she had upon becoming separated from Renee. I also wondered about the absence of siblings in Bella's life. Though my doubts remained regarding Rosalie, I knew that the others would serve well in this role. Or hoped, that is.

I walked at human pace towards the porch steps, not wanting to rush the inevitable conversation that I would now need to have with my family. Of course, they knew I was there. And, through their thoughts, I was readying myself to run the gamut of all possibilities. I hesitated at the door, Alice greeting me as she opened it impatiently. "Well it's about time Edward!" she exclaimed, Jasper suddenly by her side. "I've been waiting ALL day to talk to you about what happened!" she added, her smile covering her underlying frustration. _What the hell have you been up to Edward? _I smiled, trying to avoid discussion on any possible visions that Alice may have experienced about tonight's visitation as images of a sleeping Bella flickered through my mind.

Jasper waggled his eyebrows and said, "My my Edward, you've certainly been on an emotional roller coaster ride now haven't you?" He snickered at me, and though I knew it was impossible, his face showed the expression of one blushing. I stared at the floor for a moment, trying to rationalise my current emotions. As they had been all day, they were indecipherable. "Need a hand?" he offered, wanting to use his gift on me to rid me of my apparently incongruous behaviour.

"No Jasper," I replied sarcastically, rolling my eyes at him in irritation. I needed to feel what I was feeling in this moment, so that I could somehow express my feelings with Carlisle as I was feeling them. I pushed past the two of them, and made my way to the bottom of the stairs, the pull of Carlisle's concern driving me there. They both turned to each other and smirked as I stared at them incredulously and strode speedily up the stairs. _Aww Edward quit it! You're embarrassing me!_

"Well, I can't help that now can I Jasper!" I replied scathingly, as I turned and glared at them from the top of the stairs, sick and tired of being read like an open book. Was nothing sacred? Alice burst into fits of laughter until Jasper distracted her, staring lustfully into her eyes, my feelings rubbing off on him.

"Hey Edward!" shrieked Emmett, grinning widely as he sat on the lounge surfing the channels on the television as his thoughts continued, "You just cost me fifty bucks!" _You stud! Didn't think you had it in you, man! Still think you're crazy though!! _

"Yep and you'd better pay up!" Alice interjected as she poked her tongue out at Emmett. "There's a sucker born every minute," she added under her breath. Though it gladdened me to see my siblings behaving so positively in light of my successful day with Bella, I did not appreciate anyone betting on whether or not I would bring her back alive. Did they value Bella's life so little? Emmett rolled his eyes at Alice, rose off the couch and reached into his pocket, handing her a fifty dollar note. My fists clenched.

Rosalie walked out of the kitchen and stood next to Emmet and Alice, growling gutturally at the goings on, her venomous eyes fixated on me. As much as I did not appreciate her reaction, she, of all people, knew the serious nature of this situation. _How could you DO this Edward? Don't you know the DANGER you've put us all in? _

"Ease up on the man Rose!" Emmett said as he put his arm on Rosalie's shoulder in comfort. She pushed his hand from her shoulder, stormed toward the door, and hissed, "I have to get out of here!"

Emmett stared at me apologetically as he followed behind Rosalie, "Wait up Rose I'll come with you!" _Sorry Edward. Guess it's gonna take a little more convincing. I'll try to cool her down before we go hunting._

Esme emerged from the kitchen, surprised and embarrassed by Rosalie's outburst and walked over and stood at the bottom of the staircase. Her smile of reassurance was the only tonic I needed. _I'm so pleased that you and Bella made it through this Edward. I could not be happier for you, dear. _I smiled warmly at Esme in reply and muttered, "Thank you."

Pushing the rest of my family's irritating behaviour aside, I inhaled deeply, turned and approached Carlisle's office, knocking lightly on the door. "Come in," he replied gently, sighing as he spoke. I knew that he was dreading THIS conversation just as much as I was.

I walked through the door and closed it behind me softly. Carlisle was standing at the bookshelves, scanning his eyes over the various leather bound volumes that were part of his library. "Good morning son," he said softly as he turned and headed towards his favourite mahogany desk. "Why don't you sit down, Edward," he requested, gesturing his hand toward the leather chair as he sat on the edge of the desk to face me.

I sat there, my back ramrod straight in the chair, every muscle tensed as I stared up at my father. He of all people understood my suffering, my torment. He had watched me for near a century live an existence without true love, so desperate for me to find it that he sought it where it did not exist with the introduction of Rosalie into the family. I opened my mouth to speak, but no sound came from my lips. _It's alright son. You can tell me anything._

"Carlisle," I said hesitantly, not knowing where to start. "Things went well with Bella," I said, smiling nervously at him.

"So Alice told me, Edward. That's good to hear. So why do you need to see me? Is there a problem?" he asked, his eyes warily taking in my expression.

"Not so much a problem, but a few unexpected occurrences that have, well, surprised me," I answered awkwardly.

He smiled at me knowingly and said, "Of course there was, son. That's perfectly understandable under such unique circumstances. Tell me about these......occurrences."

I thought I would start the conversation out simply. "Well, Bella's scent somehow changed for me during the day. I was around her for so long that my initial reaction to her scent seemed to alter to a degree."

"Alter?" he asked.

"Yes. I seemed to be able to handle my reaction to it a little better," I clarified, leaving out a few minor details.

"And, that is a bad thing?" he asked, his eyebrow raised in question.

"No, of course not. I just wanted to know if you could shed some light on whether or not it is normal," I requested.

"I can't tell you much more than you already know, Edward. So much of what you have been expecting to experience is the result of conjecture and theory, but very little fact. There have not been many vampire/human relationships that have lasted longer than a few moments, especially when it comes to a human's scent as appealing as Bella's is to you." I cringed at his statement, and his eyes softened as he added, "But, if you were to look at it from a human standpoint, it would not be much different than a doctor treating a person for allergies, giving them small doses of the source of their allergy over an extended period, and thus eventually relieving, and sometimes curing, their sensitivity."

"Of course, that does seem feasible," I agreed, Carlisle confirming my theory.

Just as I was about to lead into my other more worrisome reactions, he interjected. "Don't let what I've said give you a false sense of security, Edward. I don't think you will ever be cured of your exceptional thirst for Bella's blood. You must always be on your guard with Bella if you wish to pursue this. And you must also consider the serious situation that your relationship puts our family in," he cautioned.

Of course he was right. So much of my family's future was riding on the outcome of my time with Bella Swan and now that I knew that she returned my feelings, I needed to know if I had Carlisle's support. "And, if I choose to pursue this beyond today, would you be amenable to that?"

Instead of answering, Carlisle asked me a question of his own. "Do you have the strength to show discretion and impeccable restraint for every moment beyond today son? If you don't, then I suggest you end things with her now and we make arrangements to leave," he stated flatly.

"No!" I shrieked in anguish. "It's too late. I love her Carlisle!"

Carlisle sighed heavily, his face pained. "Ah, my poor dear Edward. Your behaviour is so very human at the moment. Your emotions are guiding your every decision and though that is quite acceptable in a human relationship, yours is anything but. You must think rationally, Edward, for all our sakes. The stakes are higher than they have ever been before," he said protectively, thinking of the greater good. Of course, I understood his reasoning.

My eyes filled with ancient sadness, the gravity of risks I had been taking hitting me with brute force. I could not show my feelings towards Bella unhindered any longer, as I knew that the consequences could not only be dire for Bella, but every member of my family. I needed to stop being so selfish, so human. I could not risk losing Bella, so would have to show great restraint on my behalf. Forever. I would not be able to express myself freely as long as she was human.

"My human side has been dormant for so long that the feelings that I am experiencing are amplifying my reaction," I explained feebly, fighting back unspent tears.

He stood and put his hand on my shoulder soothingly, gently. "Edward, I'm not trying to force you two apart. I know how much you've changed for the positive since meeting Bella. I'm just trying to make you see the consequences if you fail," he explained. "You saw Alice's visions. They kept changing, forever on a knife's edge, son. That will be your constant companion if you choose this," he added rationally.

"I do not have a choice any more Carlisle, can you not see that?" I begged, my eyes filled with torment.

He smiled reassuringly and said, "Well then Edward, if that is your decision then so be it. As long as you have considered every alternative rationally, that is all anyone can ask. I cannot speak for the others, but I would be more than amenable to supporting you beyond today, if that is what you truly wish."

"Thank you Carlisle," I said humbly. "I promise I won't let you down," I added determinedly.

Carlisle released his hand from my shoulder and strode over to the huge floor to ceiling window, gazing out into the forest distractedly, thoughtfully. "Was there anything else you needed to talk about Edward?" he pressed.

I sighed, my brows creasing with thoughts of what to say, the worry within Carlisle's mind ever-present.

"What is it?" he asked, curiosity burning in his golden eyes as he turned to look at me.

"How do I deal with human feelings when I'm NOT human?" I asked, a sadness sweeping through my body, the ache to be human for Bella prevalent now more than ever.

"Son, I know how much you suffer, but I cannot give you a simple answer. This is just as new to me as it is to you," he responded, confused.

"I don't know what I'm doing Carlisle and am concerned...that...my lustful feelings may harm her. I NEED to be with her physically Carlisle, but I'm not sure how to go about it safely." And, as confident as I was on leaving Bella in her bed tonight, I knew that it was more sheer luck than any careful planning that I had not ended her life or at least gravely injured Bella. I had tested the waters without the use of a safety net. Anyone who thought rationally would see that THAT was sheer lunacy.

"Ah, yes of course that would be a difficulty," he agreed. "You must always remember who and what you are Edward and do the right thing."

"I've not had feelings like this before Carlisle. They are so intense that I worry that I will lose control."

Carlisle put his hand to his chin in thought, his scientific curiosity kicking in, and asked, "Can you describe what you felt?"

I nodded once and said, "When I kissed Bella in the meadow yesterday, she responded with great....enthusiasm in return. Once that happened, I felt a burning through every part of my body, but as if it was from the inside out. I have read what lustful feelings are supposed to be like, but this feeling is not like that. It's...." I stopped speaking mid-sentence, unable to put into words what I had felt. "It's everything all at once," I finally said.

"Curious!" he replied, his mind working overtime. _I've not heard of such a thing. _

"If I don't know what I'm dealing with, how will I know how to handle it?" I asked, reading his mind all too clearly, now discovering that it was not a normal reaction from a vampire. Well, a vampire that had physical contact with another vampire, anyway.

"The only thing I can think of son is that your response is linked to the fact that Bella's scent is so appealing to you. Being with her, more than with anyone else, means that you are fighting against some very deep-seated instincts. Perhaps your heart and mind are at war with one another and this is your body's way of dealing with it."

"Oh," I responded, frowning, considering his theory.

"Is it an unpleasant sensation?" he asked, his curiosity piqued.

"Far from it Carlisle, that's the problem," I replied, trying to smile at him to lighten the mood.

"I'm surprised that Bella has come through this unscathed under the circumstances," he whispered, nearly to himself.

I shook my head emphatically and said, "I have already decided that I WILL NOT harm her. I love her so much Carlisle. If anything happened to her...I....well.... that would be the end of my life," I finished.

"Well I admire your resolve Edward. No vampire in the history of our existence has ever been able to resist the call. No-one. And, on top of that, you not only resist, but put yourself in its way every chance you get, inviting peril wherever you turn. I will tell you one thing. I have heard the saying 'love conquers all' but this...this takes the meaning behind it beyond what I ever thought possible."

I nodded, silently agreeing with his statement as I pondered. Love does conquer all. Without love, after all, what do we have to live for? Nothing but a lonely, cruel, never-ending existence. That would NEVER be me again. I had found eternal love, and was not about to let it go. Selfish nature be damned! I NEEDED Bella Swan. There was no other choice to be made.

"Perhaps you should speak with Emmett before he goes out hunting with Rosalie. As you will recall, he has had a few experiences with human blood that calls to him. Maybe he could offer some advice on your feelings," he suggested.

"I will," I answered, relieved at the outcome of our conversation. I felt as though a weight had been lifted off my shoulders with his acceptance of my pursuit of Bella. Carlisle had also confirmed much of what I had suspected and offered some new insights into my feelings.

With this new discovery, I instantly decided that I wanted to invite Bella to meet my family. I needed to share my life with her and if my family accepted her, then that would only serve well for all concerned. If my family knew Bella as I did, they would then understand why I cannot, no, WILL NOT, live without her. They would in turn trust Bella and eventually love her. I knew this unequivocally. Miss Bella Swan invited love from everyone that she met.

"Carlisle, could I ask something of you?"

"Of course son, ask me anything."

"Could I bring Bella home to meet the family?"

"Certainly Edward. Have her come visit any time. _Might I suggest later today?_ _I think that it would be wise to do this whilst Rosalie is away hunting_," he thought lastly, in case Rosalie was within hearing distance of the house.

"That may be prudent, yes," I responded. "I will return to Bella's home and ask her when she wakes," I added, my excitement unable to be curbed.

_Yes, we don't want Rosalie to frighten the poor girl away._

I chuckled at Carlisle's thoughts and said, "Thank you Carlisle for being so forthright and understanding. I truly appreciate it."

"Not a problem son. Now if you will excuse me I have some reading to catch up on," he said, relieved that our conversation was over.

I nodded once and took my leave, elated by our conversation as I made my way my bedroom to clean up and change. I sat on my couch for a moment, staring out into the starless night, a brief moment of solitude a welcome relief after today's events. I spotted Emmett as he walked out of the garage and headed toward the house, leaving Rosalie to wallow in her spiteful thoughts, which on this day seemed to be sapping my energy. I did not see how things could be changed regarding Rosalie's feelings about Bella. My only hope was that if the rest of my family gave our relationship their blessing, she may come around eventually.

As I pondered this, I realised that I neither had the time nor the energy to focus on the negative, even though every thought and feeling of my family was so varied it made my head spin. I left my room in haste, heading down the stairs in a blur and out the door before anyone could stop me for an interrogation. "EDWARD!" shrieked Alice excitedly as I passed, Jasper holding her arm in restraint as I left. _You'd better make a break for it Edward. I won't be able to hold her back for long._

"Emmett," I said in a whisper as I ran to meet him near the fringe of the forest. _What's up Edward? _

"Can I talk to you?"

"Sure can Edward. Everything alright?" he asked.

"Let's go for a run," I suggested, not wanting prying ears to hear our conversation.

"Sure thing bro. I'm always up for a race," he said, challengingly, clapping his hands together loudly and wringing them together gleefully. Of course, I could outrun Emmett any day of the week.

"Well how about I give you a head start?" I offered, smirking. Before I could say another word, he'd disappeared into the forest. I immediately followed, tracing his scent north, passing the dilapidated cottage along the way that I had passed numerous times before. I took more notice of it this time. I noted that this place would have been quite quaint before it had fallen to ruin and wondered if Esme would be interested in renovating it. Distracting my train of thought, I heard Emmett's booming laughter echo through the primordial cedars that sat majestically atop a nearby mountain. I continued to run, his scent all over the place as I attempted to track him. Though I had speed, I was more than annoyed that tracking was not my strong suit. Suddenly, his scent disappeared as I reached a small clearing, and I stopped and listened for him.

_Think you're losing your touch Edward. Has this girl turned you soft?_

"Very funny Emmett!" I shouted as he leapt from a branch from one of the cedars, hanging like a monkey from the lowest branch, swinging his body out to do a flip and land surely on his feet. "Perhaps next time we race, you may want to consider NOT CHEATING!" I continued, laughing at my brother. He always found ways to make me smile. He was the only person that did not hesitate to voice his thoughts openly, putting anything he thought into action without hesitation. Emmett was innocent in so many ways, yet honest, loyal and brave at the same time. His humour always brought me undone. I knew that if we met as humans, we would have become fast friends, his devil-may-care nature counterbalancing my normally stoic, careful nature. A nature which had slowly become an unrecognisable human version of itself in these past weeks.

He walked past me and climbed up onto a fallen log, bending his knees up to his chest as he sat. "So. What's up Edward? Why all the secrecy?" he asked as he looked up at me.

"Well, Emmett. I just wanted to ask your advice on something. I don't suppose you overhead my conversation with Carlisle just then did you?" I asked as I sat at the edge of the log, nervously picking at pieces of bark, dissolving them between my fingers.

"Nah, I was out in the garage with Rosalie helping her tune up the Jeep. What's this all about?" he pressed.

"I was talking to Carlisle about the draw of Bella's blood. He suggested I talk to you because you've experienced it," I stated awkwardly.

"Err, Edward. I don't know how much HELP I can be. My situations didn't exactly turn out well, remember?" he said, confused and embarrassed.

"Yes, I know the OUTCOME of your experience. I wanted to know if you felt anything different when you...made....contact with those humans in particular."

"I don't get what you're trying to ask bro. You know more than anyone what THAT scent does to you!" he exclaimed, looking uncomfortable. _Why are you asking me about this? You know how much I've been trying to live those mistakes down!_

"I apologise Emmett. Forget that I asked," I said, standing to take my leave.

Emmett stared at me and frowned briefly, an expression that rarely crossed his features. He jumped from the log and faced me, blocking my way back home. "Why are you asking?" he said softly, his eyebrow cocked.

"I was overcome by some unexpected feelings when...I...kissed Bella yesterday," I replied, embarrassed. Discussing feelings with Emmett was not something that I was accustomed to.

"Oh man!" he exclaimed, his widening grin nullifying any anger or embarrassment felt by him. "Did Alice miss something? What happened?" he said excitedly. _Did you get to second base?_

I stared down at the ground, kicking the dirt under my leather shoe as I hesitated for a moment. "No Emmett. When I kissed Bella, it was as if an unstoppable fire had been lit which burned me everywhere, inside and out!" I said finally in frustration. "Did anything like that happen with you?"

"Can't say that I had that experience. But I didn't exactly KISS any of them either Edward," he said almost mournfully. Then, his eyes widened in realisation as he added, "Come to think of it though, I do remember the burning in my throat being worse than before when the one of them exhaled for the last time," he replied, shuddering. "Doesn't sound as bad as what you're describing though Edward." _Wow that's rough man._

"No it does not, Emmett," I replied. "It appears as though my experience was quite unique. I apologise for bringing it up." I could not carry on this conversation further, seeing what it did to Emmett. For many years after, he felt nothing but contempt and disgust for himself after killing those humans. I had managed to bring those long-forgotten feelings to the surface once again.

_You know Edward. I've been waiting to talk to you and you've done nothing but avoid me. Don't move!_

As usual, her timing was impeccable. "Alice!" I exclaimed, her scent crossing our path in the gentle evening breeze just as I heard her thoughts.

"Look out Edward, the pixie's on the warpath!" Emmett said, laughing as if nothing had happened, his thoughts relieved by Alice's intrusion.

No sooner had Emmett spoken, than Alice and Jasper had appeared in the clearing, hand in hand. "Oh Edward I'm so excited! Bella's coming to visit!" she said, her vision replaying through her mind on a continuous loop. "We've got to get ready!"

"Calm down Alice," I replied sarcastically. "You don't want to frighten her off do you?"

"How could my best friend be frightened of me?" Alice queried innocently.

Emmett shivered mockingly, and said, "You're evil scary Alice and you know it!" And then Emmett turned to me and said, "So. Bringing the human home for lunch eh?"

"Very funny Emmett!" I scowled, punching him in the arm.

"Yep, she's DEFINITELY made you soft Edward!" he added, his booming laughter nearly shaking the nearby trees. Before I could make further comment in rebuttal, Emmett said seriously, "If you're bringing Bella home I'd better get going. I'll keep Rose away hunting until Bella leaves." he added. "You coming Alice?" he asked.

"Hmmm...no thanks Emmett. I'm trying to stay away from Rosalie, with the mood she's in," she answered.

"Fair enough," Emmett replied diplomatically, disappointed. "Hope it goes well bro!" Emmett exclaimed as he took off in a blur through the forest back towards the house. _Still think you're crazy Edward!_

Ignoring Emmett's last thought, I turned to speak to my siblings. "Jasper, I take it you are going to be present for Bella's visit," I stated.

"Is there a problem with that Edward?" he asked.

"You still have difficulty being around humans Jasper, and I don't want anything to go wrong," I clarified.

"Jasper won't do anything Edward. I've seen it," Alice interjected, irritated that I was questioning the accuracy of her ever-changing predictions, ever-changing being the key factor.

"It's okay Alice, I understand. I would do the same if it was you darlin'," Jasper replied, squeezing her hand. "I will keep my distance, Edward. You have my word as a Southern gentleman," he stated, bowing as he spoke.

"Oh, give the southern charm a rest Jasper!" Alice scowled as she turned to me. "He's going to come with me to meet Bella and I won't hear any argument!"

"I'm not asking that Jasper stay out of the house. I am just requesting that you avoid having any close contact with Bella," I explained. "And that you hunt before we return," I added.

"Sure thing Edward," Jasper replied.

"Tell Esme that I hope to bring Bella by sometime this morning," I requested of Alice, and added, fixing my gaze on Jasper, "Are you two sure about this?"

"YES Edward!" Alice responded, her eyes suddenly vacant as she stared over my shoulder.

"Alice?" asked Jasper, still holding her hand.

Another vision began to play its way through her mind. I stood there, motionless, taking in every image and thought.

It was a vision of three vampires, two men and one woman, who were dressed in dishevelled and torn clothes, their hair wild and unkempt, their feet bare as they ran through the familiar forest. Nomads. Nomads passing through the forests fringing Forks! The woman had long flaming red hair, her crimson eyes dulled by its brilliance. One man had long black hair and darkened skin while the other had long light brown hair, his sinister crimson eyes belying the innocence of his face. "They know we're here, but I think they're just curious," Alice finally said as her lucidity returned. "I'm sure that if we run across them and let them know of our permanently claimed territory, they will go."

"Nonetheless, I will not be taking my eyes off Bella until they leave. When do you expect them to arrive?" I asked.

"Two days maybe, a few weeks tops," Alice replied casually.

"Want to let the mentally deaf guy in on the news?" Jasper asked, feeling rather put out by our fragmented conversation.

"Three nomads are going to be paying us a visit Jasper. Be on your guard, just in case," Alice explained.

"Yes ma'am!" he replied, saluting at Alice as he winked.

"And don't worry Edward. I'm sure everything will be fine," Alice said reassuringly as she stared skyward. "You'd better get back there Edward. You need to get my best friend over for a visit before Rosalie gets back!" she exclaimed, her eyes gleaming like a child on Christmas morning. "Get going Edward or you'll be late!" she added impatiently.

The sky had begun to lighten, I conceded, giving me my cue to return to Bella's comforting arms. I felt somehow conflicted. I wanted more than anything to be in Bella's company once again, but at the same time I worried about her meeting my family for the first time. I hoped with all that I was that my family would not only accept Bella, but grow to love her. After my conversation with Carlisle today, I also felt as though a little bit of my freedom had been taken away, his reaffirmation of my constant battle, and the consequences of failing, festering within me.

I nodded at them silently and took off into the forest in a blur, leaving Alice and Jasper, and the worries of the world, behind. "Don't forget to tell Esme about Bella's visit. And don't forget to hunt...oh, and Alice? Behave yourself!" I screamed, my voice booming through the forest, all the while the burning need to see my love driving me to run even faster.

_Sheesh Edward! Take a chill pill!!_

As I left my family behind, my mood lightened. I was within reach of my safe haven once again and could not be happier, the fast running near therapeutic in its effects. Every fear and doubt fell by the wayside, leaving in its wake one thing. The love that I held locked in my heart for the beautiful woman that lay sleeping in her bed. I pressed on.

As I noiselessly climbed through the window, it was as if I had never left, my feelings emerging raw and strong. She was still there, suspended in time, her dreams still holding her, her body and scent still drawing me in. I closed my eyes and inhaled her deeply, but hesitated at the end of the bed, her scent infinitesimally stronger. I decided to keep my distance until I could become used to it once more. This was going to be a great challenge, but a challenge I would relish and meet head on. Nothing was going to stop me from being with the love of my life.

I listened for Charlie, his dreams complete for the night as he stirred. I finally heard him rise from his bed, holding my breath as he visited the bathroom, on alert as he moved within the house. His thoughts conveyed agitation as he hurriedly completed his morning routine.

As the front door closed I watched Charlie cross the yard once again, his visitation to Bella's truck repeated from the night before as he reconnected the battery cable and hastened to his car. I shook my head in amusement once again as I watched his car reverse out of the driveway and pull away.

I sat in the familiar rocking chair, my thoughts turning to Charlie Swan. I longed to be formally introduced to Charlie. I wanted to be part of his life, and to be accepted by him. Of course, Charlie Swan could never be as involved in my life as I would like, but I craved his acceptance of me just the same. To my dismay, I also realised that jealousy played a part in my feelings on this subject. I knew that if Charlie was aware of my relationship with Bella, this would serve to quell his wayward thoughts of Mike Newton being a potential suitor for his daughter. I was her suitor now. I wanted him to know that.

As I pondered, Bella's sweet breaths my soothing symphony, I stared out the window to the cloud filled sky, the morning light greeting the new day in all its glory. Her breathing was slow and even and as I watched her from the comfort of the rocking chair, the light of dawn threatened to bring in the next chapter of our relationship. This was going to be another day of firsts. A day I feared, but welcomed at the same time. It was time to take our relationship to the next level. I was ready. I just hoped that my family was as well.....

**A/N: zzzzzzzz......zzzzzzzzzz....Oops! Fell asleep at the laptop! PLEASE REVIEW (she says as she yawns)**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I can't believe this! 48 reviews! Thank you to each and every one of you! I've tried to PM you all to thank you, but if I've missed responding: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU SO VERY, VERY MUCH! It means a great deal to me that you take the time to respond to my story and I'm so very pleased that you are continuing to enjoy reading it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't claim to own the Twilight characters or any such subsidiaries or franchises. Ah, but a girl can dream can't she? Surely??? Please??????**

*******DON' T FORGET TO READ "WITHIN THESE WALLS". JUST POSTED CHAPTER 3!*******

EPOV

The light filtered through the window of the familiar room and Bella stirred within her bed, her position on her back as she covered her eyes with her arm, no doubt to keep the increased light away from them. She moaned and rolled onto her side, facing her glorious form away from the light's invasion. I continued to patiently sit in my position on the rocking chair, her face full of surprise and confusion as she suddenly sat up.

"Oh!" she moaned, her voice cracking as she spoke her first word for the morning, her soulful eyes searching the bed as she spoke.

I sat casually and stared at Bella, her hair the evidence of her restless and most momentous dream the night before. She had never looked more beautiful! "Your hair looks like a haystack....but I like it," I said, admiring her beauty whilst trying to keep a civil distance between us. What I really wanted to do was scoop her up into my arms and hold her there forever. Of course, Bella's thoughts once again seemed to be aligned with mine, though what she did next took even me by surprise.

"Edward!" she croaked. "You stayed!" With the speed that any vampire would be pressed to challenge, Bella leapt from her bed and was in my lap before I was able to think. Reflexively, I wrapped my arms around Bella, her scent swamping me momentarily, causing the burning to return in the process. Within a split second of time I was in control once again, proud of myself for being able to adjust to her actions so quickly as the burning eased to a tolerable level. Just as suddenly, her thoughts seemed to catch up with her body's movements, causing Bella to freeze in my arms as she had done so many times before.

My nervous reaction of laughter was instant. "Of course," I confirmed as my hands that clutched her began to absent-mindedly rub her back soothingly. I felt every curve of her spine under my touch, which reminded me of a beautiful string of pearls. The ever-present electricity passed through the thin material of her tattered shirt, my finger briefly touching her skin through a small tear within it. Bella sat comfortably on my lap, her head leaning on my shoulder as she inhaled deeply.

"I was sure it was a dream," she whispered, her body working its way closer to mine.

"You're not that creative," I answered. Of course, I knew better, her dream of last night being one example that would refute my statement.

Just like that, she was out of my arms. "Charlie!" she exclaimed as she jumped from my lap and ran towards the door, her absence filling me with an immediate feeling of loss. Sensing her panic, I brushed aside my feelings and instead sought to reassure Bella.

"He left an hour ago – after reattaching your battery cables, I might add. I have to admit I was disappointed. Is that really all it would take to stop you, if you were determined to go?" I said, still amused by Charlie's behaviour on one hand, while on the other wanting to hold Bella in my arms once again. She stood near the door, giving me the impression that she had no intention of returning to my lap, no doubt her consideration of my response foremost in her mind. "You're not usually this confused in the morning," I stated, holding my arms out for Bella to return to them, needing her skin on mine desperately.

"I need another human minute," Bella said, her face expressing regret as she hesitated at the door.

"I'll wait," I replied, elated at the fact that she had not rejected me, her blush crossing her cheeks as she opened the door and headed for the bathroom. Everything she did was so charming, and I was more than delighted that the heat in her cheeks elicited such a different response in me than it did when we first met.

As I heard her hurriedly complete her morning routine, I walked over to the bed, taking Bella's pillow in my hands and inhaling deeply, fearful that her scent would become stronger once she returned. I could not, would not, leave anything to chance. As I returned to the chair I listened for movement. Her heart was thudding once again in her haste. I closed my eyes and listened, smiling as I did so.

Bella finished and opened the bathroom door, her footsteps back to her room fast for any human, let alone Bella Swan.

I opened my arms widely as she entered, reaching for my love as my need increased at the very sight of her. Her hair was brushed, its sheen making her appear to glow and her face was bright with excitement as her heart called to me. The blush was still there, and in concert with her hair and face, it made her appear almost cherubic.

"Welcome back," I murmured, taking Bella into my arms as relief washed through me. I began to rock her in my arms, the movement comforting as the chair moved us rhythmically as one, my ears taking in the soothing rhythm of her heart as the scent of her shampoo and toothpaste surrounded me.

"You left?" she finally asked as she touched the collar of my shirt.

What was I to tell her? I did not relish confessing to Bella the events, good and bad, of last night. I decided to give Bella a humorous answer, evading the real reason behind my absence. "I could hardly leave in the clothes I came in – what would the neighbours think?"

Of course, Bella did not respond well to my attempt at humour, instead pouting.

"You were very deeply asleep; I didn't miss anything," I explained, adding with a smile, "The talking came earlier." I was, once again, wrapped up in a moment of pure bliss as I recalled her words of declaration.

She stared at me alarmingly and asked, "What did you hear?"

"You said you loved me," I whispered, leaving out the details of the words that she spoke either side of her declaration, hoping that she had no recollection of my indiscretion.

"You knew that already," she stated, lowering her head, taking her gaze away from mine.

"It was nice to hear just the same," I replied, stopping myself from kissing her roughly in gratitude.

She dug her face into my shoulder, her face completely hidden from view as she spoke the three most significant words in my world. Words that I had waited near a century to hear. "I love you," she whispered, the heat from her breath fanning across my skin as she spoke, the warmth of her skin and words enveloping my senses.

My stomach tightened at her utterance, a combination of elation and insecurity suddenly overwhelming me. "You are my life now," I responded automatically, as I recalled that I had not, in so many words, returned my declaration. I wondered why I was such a coward, every opportune moment that had come my way frittered away as I danced around the words that she had spoken not only in her sleep, but also in the splendour of her wakeful hours. I suddenly realised that Miss Bella Swan was a braver soul than I, both consciously and subconsciously while I, on the other hand, was a poor excuse of a man, human or otherwise.

Too late to correct my statement, I silently rocked her in my arms once again as the morning light brightened her room, the heavens blessing our embrace as I tried to reason with my emotions. I loved her more than anything of course, but I just could not articulate it in so many words. I was afraid of the repercussions, her words not competing in any way with mine if eventually spoken. My previously made declarations, though lesser in their combination when said, had more meaning behind them than she would ever know. I feared more than anything that she would reject me eventually, breaking my heart in the process as she made the realisation that I was not worthy of her. I continued to rock her, trying to soothe myself as I did so. As the moments passed, I realised that I should press Bella to ready herself for the day ahead, my focus returning to the task at hand and away from my insecure feelings.

"Breakfast time," I stated, remembering her need for sustenance. Her constant need for food was going to be something that I would have to adapt to, and its preparation was something that I knew would be expected of me at some juncture. This, I realised, would be another human ritual to learn and master, and as I considered that, Bella did something that shocked me yet again.

She sat back and stared at me with widened eyes, suddenly clutching her hands to her throat as if to offer herself to me, and not in a good way, her scent once again pervading my senses.

I stared at her dumbfounded, unable to think of what to say in response as I tried to regain my composure. What was she DOING?

She said, snickering, "Just kidding! And you said I couldn't act!"

I did NOT find her attempt at humour amusing. "That wasn't funny," I said, my heart lurching at the very thought of her offer.

"It was very funny and you know it," she responded, her face searching mine for forgiveness. It did not take me long to recover. How could I remain angry at the woman I loved?

I rolled my eyes in response and finally said, "Shall I rephrase? Breakfast time for the human," I corrected in haste.

"Oh okay," she agreed.

Not wanting to let her go, and still somewhat annoyed at her antics, I picked Bella up and threw her body over my shoulder, her heart resting against my back as I took her from her room.

"Edward!" she gasped in response, but I chose to ignore her protests, wanting more than anything to have Bella in my arms forever as her heat surrounded me once again. Ah! I was knocking on heaven's door yet again! I carried her down the stairs and entered the kitchen, reluctantly placing her in the kitchen chair.

"What's for breakfast?" she asked, staring at me as she smiled. What indeed.

"Err, I'm not sure. What would you like?" I asked, knowing that I was incapable of preparing any sort of human food, as I scanned the kitchen, searching for an answer.

Bella grinned in response, confidently rising from the chair and said, "That's alright. I fend for myself pretty well. Watch me hunt."

Not taking my eyes off her for one moment, I watched Bella reach into a cupboard and retrieve a box of cereal and a bowl, then go to the refrigerator and retrieve a fresh carton of milk. As she poured the contents of the box and milk into the bowl, she retrieved a spoon from the nearby drawer and took her seat once again. The food was a bland shade of brown with no logical shape, looking much the same as shredded pieces of cardboard. Its smell was sweet, though with no substance other than, I concluded, pure sugar. Even as a human, I could not have imagined that I would have found this food appealing.

"Can I get you anything?" she offered. Not likely.

"Just eat," I replied, rolling my eyes as I spoke.

I watched her, fascinated, as she ingested the food. I was amazed at how every little movement of Bella, even when eating cardboard, seemed to take me in, each new action allowing me to experience a little more of her, the draw of her never for one moment diminishing. I was, in no uncertain terms, hooked.

"What's on the agenda for today?" Bella questioned as she swallowed another portion of food.

"Hmmm," I replied as I steeled myself for my request of her. Having no idea of what her reaction would be, the fear of her response played heavily on my mind, and I baulked at elaborating for a moment. "What would you say to meeting my family?" I finally asked of her.

With no food to speak of in her mouth, she gulped, her eyes widening infinitesimally. Was she finally afraid? Was the prospect of meeting my family too daunting even for her? Perhaps this was what was required to make Bella realise the gravity of associating with my kind, giving her a reason to run for the hills.

"Are you afraid now?" I asked, seeing in her eyes the fear which no doubt she tried to hide.

"Yes," she finally admitted. Relief and disappointment washed through me in unison; however I replied to her admission with a smirk, trying to be the knight in shining armour for my Bella. I NEEDED her to meet my family and had to allay her fear. "Don't worry, I'll protect you."

Then, as was her way, she surprised me yet again. "I'm not afraid of THEM," she explained. "I'm afraid they won't....like me. Won't they be, well, surprised that you would bring someone....like me....home to meet them? Do they know that I know about them?"

Of course! Would nothing scare this woman? Did her insecurities and charming character flaws need to always win over her logic and fear? Bah!

I calmed myself and said casually, "Oh they already know everything." Then I smiled, whilst at the same time trying to hide my frustration at my family's flagrant disrespect of the serious nature of my situation. "They'd taken bets yesterday, you know, on whether I'd bring you back. Though why anyone would bet against Alice, I can't imagine." Then, I explained further, "At any rate, we don't have any secrets in the family. It's not really feasible, what with my mind reading and Alice seeing the future and all that."

"And Jasper making you feel all warm and fuzzy about spilling your guts, don't forget about that," Bella added, surprising me.

"You paid attention," I said approvingly, smiling at my Bella. Ah....if only she knew Jasper had already cast his spell on her.....

"I've been known to do that every now and again," she replied, grimacing as she spoke further, "So, did Alice see me coming?"

My stomach tied itself in knots at the very thought of her probing question. Alice not only saw Bella coming, but saw her come to grief in a thousand different visions, each vision having one thing in common. Me. Ever since the first day I saw her, the predictions had flooded Alice's mind, and in turn mine, each new vision as deeply disturbing as the last. And though her visions of Bella were often indistinct, with flickers of images being all that were able to be seen, there was no mistaking their meaning. Through these visions, I knew that I had saved her life on more than one occasion. However my presence in Bella's life had changed her fate so radically that I still blamed myself for her life hanging by such a thin thread in the first place. The anger and frustration began to well within me at the very thought of my irresponsible behaviour.

I was unable to keep up with our playful banter and said, looking away from her, "Something like that." Bella stared at me curiously, her eyes searching for the reason behind my reaction. She was not going to get an answer from me regarding this subject, which I then attempted to change.

"Is that any good?" I asked, my eyes glancing back to her food, still unable to make eye contact with her. "Honestly it doesn't look very appetising," I added, focusing on her food, distracting myself in an attempt to keep a lid on my anger. How could I expect to make this work when thoughts of Alice's visions kept bringing me back to the grimmest of realities?

"Well, it's no irritable grizzly," she replied, seemingly choosing to ignore my angered expression as she picked up her spoon and began to inhale her food. I stood there motionless, still unable to take in her gaze as I directed my vision out the window and pondered. Irritable grizzly indeed! Was she mocking me? Then I realised what she was trying to do. She was trying to bring me out of my terrible mood, and I should be grateful that she was, instead of silently accusing her of doing something that she was incapable of. I should be pleased that she recalled Emmett's favourite, and that she also seemed so accepting of it. Once again, I envisioned Bella Swan fitting very well into my family and realised that I longed for the very same thing. That thought brought me back to what I really wanted.

I stared into her eyes again and smiled. "And you should introduce me to your father, too, I think," I requested.

"He already knows you," she reminded me.

Of course he already knew OF me, however I wanted to develop a bond with Charlie Swan, while at the same time leave no doubt in his mind that I was his daughter's love. Her only love. Of course, using love and such terms of reference on Charlie Swan could cause him to reach for his gun, so I simply said, "As your boyfriend, I mean," I clarified, though that description hardly had the depth of meaning behind it that I was going for.

Bella stared at me with suspicion in her chocolate brown eyes and asked, "Why?"

"Isn't that customary?" I answered, my knowledge of such human traditions only ever read about in books.

"I don't know," she admitted. I watched her as her mind seemed to tick over, her consideration of my question seemingly confounding her. And then, she once again said something selfless, trying to no doubt let me off the hook unnecessarily. "That's not necessary, you know. I don't expect you to...I mean, you don't have to pretend for me," she said, her insecurities seemingly laid bare.

When would this woman EVER realise the depth of feeling that I had for her? "I'm not pretending," I replied slowly, unusually patient as I realised her personal experience regarding this matter was as limited as mine. Either that or she did not want me to be officially known as her boyfriend. I decided that the former theory was the least worrisome and chose to ignore the latter.

Bella pushed the food around the bowl, biting her lip in the process. She was, once again, bringing me undone without realising it. Finally, my patience ran out, my desire to know her thoughts swiftly pushing the patience away. "Are you going to tell Charlie I'm your boyfriend or not?" I demanded somewhat childishly.

Her eyes took in mine for a moment as she replied, "Is that what you are?"

"It's a loose interpretation of the word 'boy' I'll admit," I replied, hoping that the word, and not the connotation of its meaning, was what had bothered her.

Then she said something that made my heart sing. "I was under the impression that you were something more," she said, suddenly staring at the table as she spoke.

A surge of relief washed through me, her statement reflecting my exact feelings. We WERE something more than just boyfriend and girlfriend, though I was at a loss to find the exact words. Of course, for Charlie's sake and mine, boyfriend would just have to suffice. For now.

"Well, I don't know if we need to give him all the gory details," I replied as I reached across the table and placed my finger under Bella's chin briefly, lifting her eyes to meet mine, the heat there once again. "But he will need some explanation for why I'm around here so much. I don't want Chief Swan getting a restraining order put on me," I added, fully aware of the overprotective nature of Bella's father, withdrawing my hand at that thought.

"Will you be?" Bella asked, the anxiety crossing her beautiful face. "Will you really be here?" Was she that doubtful?

"As long as you want me," I reassured her, leaving that decision completely in her hands. Forever had an entirely different connotation for me than for a seventeen year old human whose life was just beginning. Bella needed to be given the option that was humanly possible for her, and not have to concede to some ridiculous eternal dream of mine.

"I'll always want you. Forever," she confessed, her statement drawing me to her as I slowly walked around the table toward her, pondering her words. They made me feel...selfish, yet elated, and sad all at the same time. Selfish for expecting her to give up everything for me, elated because of what that selfishness had thus far achieved, and sad because though I knew that at this time we could be together, she was human and her life would end one day. And so, in turn, would mine.

My emotions raw and stirring within, I reached out and touched my fingers to the warmth and softness of her cheek, staring into the depths of her eyes. "Does that make you sad?" she asked of me, my heart obviously on my sleeve. I could not answer her. Not without upsetting her. I continued to stare, trying to gain strength and comfort from the deep caramel flecks that existed within her eyes. The eyes that were my window to the one and only soul in this world that I felt connected to. My Bella. As much as I felt tortured by her statement, I needed to press on, and press on so I would.

"Are you finished?" I finally asked.

Bella jumped to her feet quickly and replied, "Yes."

"Get dressed – I'll wait here," I said, realising that she was still in her bedroom attire. Not that I would not like to see her remain in that, just as she was. My desire began to well within me once again as I watched her pass me and head for the stairs.

Bella bounded up the stairs two by two and slammed the door behind her. I chuckled. Her enthusiasm was so very delightful! I cleared the dishes and placed them into the sink, all the while my thoughts remaining with her and the day I had planned. I smiled. Though I did have doubts and fears about today, they all seemed to disappear into insignificance. I knew that this would work, and Alice's enthusiasm about her visit only served to increase my confidence.

At the sound of Bella opening her door, I left the kitchen and stood at the bottom of the stairs, anxiously waiting for her once again. My eyes took in everything about her as she stood there at the top of the stairs, the dark blue blouse she wore enhancing her beauty, if that were even possible. She was, in a word, breathtaking. "Okay, I'm decent," she said as she bounded down the stairs and collided with me. I immediately steadied her in response and pulled her closer after I knew her feet had caught up with her body, unable to resist the temptation that was uniquely Bella Swan.

I leaned into her, resting my cheek against hers for a moment and whispered into her ear, "Wrong again. You are utterly indecent – no-one should look so tempting, it's not fair."

As was usual, her response to my words was misconstrued. "Tempting how?" she asked. "I can change....." she added, completely missing my point. Had I lost my touch?

I sighed heavily and shook my head and said, "You are SO absurd." I pressed my lips to her forehead, the searing burn, coupled with a little sweat from her rushing, once again making me ache for her. She seemed momentarily incoherent as her heart's pace increased invitingly, and though no words escaped her lips, I knew what she was thinking.

"Shall I explain how you are tempting me?" I asked, tracing my fingers down the string of pearls of her spine, my breathing quickening against her alabaster skin with every touch. Her hands softly caressed my chest and she still did not speak. I had no choice but to do what I did next.

I tilted my head down towards her, her pulsating heart only encouraging me to do so. I touched my lips to hers once again, gently parting them as I did so, using every restraint possible not to attack her wildly. Her scent once again burned down my throat, but to a lesser degree as she was not exhaling. My stomach tightned as the familiar burn continued on relentlessly. And then, just like that, she collapsed in my arms, my sudden concern stopping the burn in its tracks.

"Bella?" I said, panicked, my alarm immediate as I held her limp body up.

"You.....made....me.....faint," she breathed.

"WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH YOU?" I groaned in exasperation. "Yesterday I kiss you, and you attack me! Today you pass out on me!"

She laughed weakly, with no real force behind it to speak of. Her eyes rolled briefly as I watched her, the concern never leaving me as I waited anxiously for her to recover.

"So much for being good at everything," I said, sighing heavily at the very thought of killing her with my kissing expertise, or lack thereof.

"That's the problem. You're TOO good. Far too good," she said, her face having lost its colour.

"Do you feel sick?" I asked.

"No – that wasn't the same kind fainting at all. I don't know what happened," she said, shaking her head. "I think I forgot to breathe," she added vaguely.

"I can't take you anywhere like this," I conceded.

"I'm fine," she insisted. "Your family is going to think I'm insane anyway, what's the difference?" she added. I chose to ignore her self-deprecating comment, and instead focused on ensuring that she was indeed fine. I stared at her face, and watched as the colour slowly began to return, and waited for heart to beat steadily once again. No sooner had she recovered, than my eyes wandered over her, admiring her beauty once again. Obviously, I had not recovered from our kiss as quickly as Bella.

Still holding her closely I said, "I'm very partial to that colour with your skin."

My complimentary statement caused her to blush once again and avert her eyes from my gaze. "Look, I'm trying really hard not to think about what I'm about to do, so can we go already?" she asked impatiently. She confounded me to no end. And distracted me. I wanted nothing more than to kiss her again, but that would have to wait as I realised that kissing Bella was still fraught with unpredictable consequences.

"And you're worried, not because you're headed to meet a houseful of vampires, but because you think those vampires won't approve of you, correct?" I asked her, wanting her assurance once again as to her ill-directed fear.

"That's right," she clarified immediately.

"You're incredible," I said, shaking my head as I spoke. Incredible, I realised, in more ways than one. I released my grasp on her, watching her every move to ensure that she had control of her balance as she walked from the kitchen. We headed towards the door in silence and onto our new adventure as I took my place at the driver's side of the truck.

Bella watched the outside world meander by as I drove, her mind seemingly taking in every twist and turn of the unfamiliar road that led to the Cullen house. As the road narrowed and we were surrounded by the familiar ferns, she gasped as the drive ended and opened into the place that was the family's only sanctuary, and my only other safe haven.

I cut the engine and turned to her, watching her intently as her mouth gaped in amazement. As we sat in the cab of the truck, I watched her take in everything of the house from its rectangular shape to its three story size and its large porch which wrapped around the first storey. It was indeed a spectacular house, aged more than a hundred years, and Esme had lovingly renovated it to the splendour that it was today. But of course, its beauty paled into insignificance now that Bella was gracing it with her presence. This place finally felt like more than a house. It felt like a home. A home that welcomed the both of us with open arms.

"Wow," she finally said in approval, seemingly overwhelmed.

"You like it?" I asked, smiling widely, chuckling as I pulled the end of her ponytail. Her scent once again left her and surrounded me, momentarily bringing me undone within the confines of the truck. I needed to focus.

"Ready?" I asked after immediately alighting from the truck and opening her door.

"Not even a little bit – let's go," she said, contradicting herself as she smoothed her hair nervously.

"You look lovely," I responded in assurance, gazing at my beauty as I took her warm hand in mine and helped her out of the truck.

Sensing the tension building in her body as we approached the porch, I soothingly rubbed the back of her hand with my thumb as I tried to convey a wordless sense of comfort.

I opened the door for Bella and she stood there, surprised, at the very sight of what was inside. I watched her eyes gaze at the south wall and beyond the glass, taking in the vast lawn and river beyond. She then turned her eyes toward the curving staircase which effaced the western wall. I waited momentarily for her to absorb the home and lastly to fix her eyes on my waiting parents, who stood silently to the left of the door in front of my piano, which she glanced at and let out a small gasp as she did so.

_My my, what a beautiful young lady. _Esme thought as she smiled warmly at Bella.

Carlisle glanced at me quickly. _We won't approach her Edward. Let's just take things slowly, son. _He then turned his gaze towards Bella and smiled at her in welcome.

"Carlisle, Esme, this is Bella," I said, breaking the brief silence. I nodded towards Carlisle to approach, though not so Bella would notice.

"You're very welcome Bella," Carlisle said as he motioned slowly towards Bella, tentatively reaching his hand out to greet her.

She surprised Carlisle by stepping forward and taking his hand in her free one and shaking it confidently. His eyes darted towards me, the confusion there for only a brief moment, as she said, "It's nice to see you again, Dr. Cullen."

_Well, Miss Swan has certainly taken me by surprise Edward. She did not even flinch! What a delightful, well adjusted young lady!_

I smiled inwardly at Carlisle's thoughts. Bella was always surprising me, so I knew that she would obviously continue to do this with the rest of my family. They'd better get used to it.

"Please call me Carlisle," he finally replied, Bella's confidence taking him aback for a brief moment as he released her hand.

"Carlisle," she repeated, grinning at him. I watched her carefully, taking in every response to him. She was incredible! I breathed a huge sigh of relief. I now knew that all would be well.

_Oh my goodness! She touched Carlisle without hesitation! Edward, she's....she's.....just amazing! May I?_

I nodded once again to Esme, giving her permission to approach Bella, while fending off Alice's impatient thoughts from her room. Alice would have to wait her turn, but patience wasn't exactly her strong suit either.

Esme stepped forward and shook Bella's hand, surprised once again by her absence of reaction. She could not help but smile affectionately at Bella. "It's very nice to know you," she said sincerely, the love pouring out of her as though she had found a lost daughter. Ah, Bella had cast her spell on yet another unsuspecting victim!

"Thank you, I'm glad to meet you too," Bella replied as she released Esme's grasp and stepped back.

_Please Edward! Let me come meet her!! PLEASE!!!_

Unable to cope with Alice's incessant nagging for another moment, I said innocently, "Where are Alice and Jasper?" I clutched Bella's hand in mine and readied myself for the onslaught that was Alice.

_Hooray! Thanks Edward! Oh, and it's about time!!_

They were both suddenly at the top of the stairs. "Hey Edward!" she called with unbridled enthusiasm, flying down the stairs in her haste to meet Bella. Jasper followed slowly behind and stared at me, shrugging his shoulders as he waited at the bottom of the stairs. Carlisle and Esme shot Alice a warning stare, but nothing was going to stop her. Bella was a little surprised, but at the same time was so used to my fast movements that she seemed to take Alice's burst of enthusiasm in her stride. She looked at me, no doubt trying to work out what I was thinking, whilst in turn I was trying to figure out the exact same thing.

_Sorry Edward, I tried to reign her in. But how do you control a pixie-sized hurricane?_

I glanced at Jasper knowingly and shot him a warning glare.

_I know Edward. I'll keep my distance._

Then, what Alice did next took EVERYONE by surprise. "Hi Bella!" Alice shrieked as she leant in and kissed Bella on the cheek. My body immediately stiffened as I watched Bella's look of shock, alongside my parents who were aghast, as Alice inhaled Bella's scent. Everyone's shocked thoughts invaded my mind at the very same moment, all of the same tenor except for Alice's. _She's so pretty Edward! I love her! We're going to be such good friends!! _

"You do smell nice, I hadn't noticed before," Alice commented further, so casually that it seemed ridiculous. Her comment only served to make things worse, causing Bella to blush. I watched Jasper with caution as his eyes honed in on the blood that had rushed to Bella's cheeks.

_What the hell Alice! _Jasper thought, his eyes begging her to stop.

My eyes narrowed as I waited for Jasper to lose control. To my surprise, he seemed rather shocked that I had assumed the worst. _Stop it Edward! I'm under control and I don't appreciate you accusing me of something I have not done! _

With everyone's emotions on a razors edge, Jasper strode forward a few steps closer and used his gift on us all, a feeling of ease and comfort overcoming the entire family, including Bella. "Hello Bella," Jasper said politely, not offering his hand. I stared at him in accusation. _Well I'm not going to risk you killing me Edward! Sorry I had to use my gift. And don't worry, I'm in control, though that blush sure did knock me for a loop for a moment!_

"Hello Jasper," she said in response, smiling at him, her eyes full of serenity. All was well once again, which was probably a good thing in retrospect. "It's nice to meet you all. You have a very beautiful home," Bella said, smiling at the rest of the family, the tension in the atmosphere gone in a puff of smoke.

"Thank you. We're so glad that you came," Esme said, returning Bella's smile. Carlisle glanced toward me in the same motion.

_Son, Alice told me about three visitors coming our way. Did you know about this? Are you going to warn Bella about them?_

I stared at Carlisle and nodded once. After all, I was going to be on twenty four hour watch for Bella and would need to explain exactly why that was the case, save her thinking I was some crazed stalker. I had an obligation to protect Bella, and would stop at nothing to meet that obligation. I decided that I also had an obligation to tell her about them, but that I would tell her when the time was right.

Bella noted our silent conversation, but seemingly thought better of asking me what it was about. For now, anyway. She looked away and her eyes once again took in the sight of my perfectly polished black grand piano that sat on the platform adjacent to the doorway. Her thoughts seemed to wander as she took in every curve, every key and every line of the majestic instrument before her.

"Do you play?" Esme finally asked, noting Bella's fascination.

"Not at all," Bella replied, shaking her head. "But it's beautiful. Is it yours?"

_You didn't tell her Edward?_

"No," Esme replied, laughing at my apparent missed opportunity to impress Bella Swan. "Edward didn't tell you he was musical?" she asked.

"No," she replied, her eyes narrowing at me as I tried to give her my best look of innocence. I was pleased that I could still manage to surprise her, and it made a welcoming change that the surprise was a pleasant one. "I should have known, I guess," she added as Esme's confusion only served to annoy Bella further.

"Edward can do everything, right?" she finally said as though conceding defeat.

_Oh this one's a pill Edward! _Jasper thought as he snickered and reached out to take Alice's hand in his. There was one thing that was of benefit when Jasper used his gift. It seemed to shut Alice up for a while.

_Edward can't teach Bella how to dress! I can do that! _Alice finally thought as she looked at Bella's attire. _Though the colour blue does suit her well_. I smiled as I realised that it didn't last as long as I'd hoped. I glanced toward Alice, pleading with her to keep her thoughts to herself. _Fine!_

Esme looked at me reprovingly. _Edward I hope you have been behaving like a gentleman!_

"I hope you haven't been showing off Edward, it's rude," Esme finally said out loud, scolding me both mentally and verbally.

I couldn't help but laugh in reply. "Just a bit."

_Well if it helped you gain the love of this wonderful girl, then I guess I can forgive you Edward. _Esme shot me a smug stare, silently approving of my behaviour.

"He's been too modest actually," Bella corrected, defending me to my mother. I loved her so much.

"Well, play for her," Esme responded, staring at me with encouragement. _Please play my song Edward....it's been far too long._

I could not help but tease Esme as I retorted, "But I thought you said showing off was rude."

"There are exceptions to every rule," she replied immediately. _Stop teasing Edward!_

"I'd like to hear you play," Bella interjected, forever the peacemaker. Of course, there was no way that I could refuse her.

"It's settled then," added Esme for good measure as she pushed me towards the piano. With Bella's hand already in mine, I dragged her with me involuntarily, Esme's push stronger than the average human's. Bella and I sat together at the piano and I gave her a look of exasperation, not wanting to release her hand from mine.

_Edward, she's wonderful! Play for her Edward – please?_

I reluctantly released my hand from Bella's warmth and rested my fingers on the keys, as I finally began to play the song that I had composed for Esme. _Oh Edward! _I smiled. Esme loved it when I played this song, though until recently I didn't have the desire to play anything. Not until a certain Miss Bella Swan came into my life. As my fingers danced across the keys and the notes echoed through the large room, Bella moved in closer and her mouth opened in astonishment.

_Aww, innit cute? _Jasper thought as he chuckled.

_Edward, just so you know. I won't be silenced like this whenever you decide to bring Bella here. Next time, it's my turn! _Alice thought childishly.

_Son, we will leave you be. You need time to let her adjust to all of this. We will be upstairs if you need us._

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Carlisle signal to the family to leave us, to my welcome relief. Alice folded her arms in frustration, but reluctantly did as she was asked and quietly followed the family upstairs. We were finally alone. Well, as alone as two people can be with a houseful of vampires who can hear every word could be.

I looked at Bella and casually winked at her, as Esme's song surrounded us, its surging power ringing through every corner of the house. "Do you like it?" I asked.

"You wrote this?" she gasped with a look of understanding on her face.

"It's Esme's favourite," I added, watching Bella closely as she closed her eyes and shook her head.

"What's wrong?" I asked, concerned about her response, my hands never missing a key as I played.

"I'm feeling extremely insignificant," she answered. SHE was feeling insignificant? I was awestruck by this woman! She never ceased to amaze me. From the time I had met her up until this very moment, Bella had done nothing but love and accept me. And now, she had not only accepted me, but had lovingly embraced my entire family! Words could not describe how I felt in that moment....and then it hit me.

I slowed my tempo and began to play Bella's Lullaby, its tone so sweet that the song in my head could not compare. "You inspired this one," I said sweetly, my hands gracefully touching each key in respect of who this composition was dedicated to.

Bella sat there, silent, as she watched my hands tell her what my words could not say, what my heart could not describe.

"They like you, you know," I said, trying to get Bella to speak. "Esme especially," I added. Bella looked around and seemingly made the realisation that we were alone.

"Where did they go?" she asked finally.

"Very subtly giving us some privacy, I suppose."

Bella sighed and said, "THEY like me. But Rosalie and Emmett...." she said, stopping mid sentence, causing me to frown.

"Don't worry about Rosalie. She'll come around," I assured, trying to be all too persuasive as my fingers danced across the keys.

Bella pursed her lips in response, no doubt sceptical of my statement. She was, as always, very perceptive. "Emmett?" she asked.

"Well, he thinks I'M a lunatic, it's true, but he doesn't have a problem with you. He's trying to reason with Rosalie."

"What is it that upsets her?" she asked. What indeed. I could write volumes.

I sighed deeply in response, frustrated by Rosalie's ridiculous behaviour which appeared to be the one thorn in my side that was not so easy to rid myself of. "Rosalie struggles the most with....with what we are. It's hard for her to have someone on the outside know the truth. And she's a little jealous," I added candidly.

"Rosalie is jealous of me?" Bella asked as she looked at me incredulously, her stunned face making me feel a little annoyed by Rosalie's antics. Ah there it was. It seemed that Rosalie's arrogance had made Bella feel inferior to her. Of course, she had things completely wrong.

"You're human," I stated simply, shrugging. "She wishes that she were too," I added.

"Oh," she muttered, though still stunned. "Even Jasper though...."

"That's really my fault," I interjected, my hands still playing as I spoke. "I told you he was the most recent to try our way of life. I warned him to keep his distance." With that statement, Bella shuddered, but continued her line of questioning.

"Esme and Carlisle.....?"

"Are happy to see me happy. Actually, Esme wouldn't care if you had a third eye and webbed feet. All this time she's been worried about me, afraid that there was something missing from my essential makeup, that I was too young when Carlisle changed me....She's ecstatic. Every time I touch you, she just about chokes with satisfaction," I finished.

"Alice seems very....enthusiastic," she said diplomatically. Ah yes, Alice. Enthusiastic indeed. Of course, I would not, could not reveal everything about what Alice knew.

"Alice has her own way of looking at things," I said as my lips tightened in refusal to elaborate.

"And you're not going to explain that, are you?" she replied, perceptive as usual.

We stared at each other in silence for a moment, the only sounds coming from the sweet notes of her special lullaby. I pondered whether this was the right time to tell Bella of our impending visitors. After all, I didn't want to tempt fate. If I told her, then at least she would try to keep herself safe by not going into the woods alone, or some such other disastrous thing. And, of course, it would allow me a perfectly good reason to be with Bella at all times, and THAT thought was an appealing bonus. Then, of course as if she were reading my mind, Bella surprised me yet again.

"So what was Carlisle telling you before?"

I frowned, the realisation of her perceptive ways making it more and more difficult to keep anything from her. "You noticed that, did you?"

She shrugged casually and replied, "Of course."

I considered what I needed to say without frightening her, whilst at the same time to convey the serious nature of the situation. "He wanted to tell me some news – he didn't know if it was something I would share with you."

"Will you?" she asked.

"I have to, because I'm going to be a little....overbearingly protective over the next few days – or weeks – and I wouldn't want you to think I'm naturally a tyrant."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, exactly. Alice just sees some visitors coming soon. They know we're here, and they're curious." I hoped that was the case, anyway.

"Visitors?" she gasped.

"Yes....well they aren't like us of course – in their hunting habits I mean. They probably won't come into town at all, but I'm certainly not going to let you out of my sight until they're gone," I said protectively.

Bella responded with a shiver as I spoke. "Finally, a rational response!" I exclaimed, relieved at her realisation as to the gravity of the matter. "I was beginning to think you had no sense of self-preservation at all."

She responded by looking away and surveying the room as I continued to play, not missing a beat during our entire conversation as I followed her gaze. "Not what you expected is it?" I asked, changing the subject to make her feel at ease once again.

"No," she responded.

"No coffins, no piled skulls in the corners, I don't even think we have cobwebs....what a disappointment this must be for you," I added with humour, teasingly.

Ignoring my jibes, she said, "It's so light...so open." That it was. It was the one open, light place that we could be ourselves without worrying about anyone's reaction.

"It's the one place we never have to hide," I replied in a more serious tone, realising that my having to hide from the world would become part of Bella's life as well. I had discovered yet another reason to admit that I was one very selfish vampire who did not deserve this woman.

Bella's Lullaby began to drift to its natural end, just as our relationship would one day. As the last note echoed through the room, my mind turned to her mortality. As I pondered these morose thoughts, I noticed tears appearing in Bella's eyes. It was amazing just how synchronised our feelings were. If I had tears to shed, I would be crying in her arms at this very moment. I watched as each tear flowed from her beautiful eyes, her emotions unable to be hidden. "Thank you," she whispered, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

Just as one final tear threatened to escape the corner of her eye, I involuntarily reached out and trapped it onto my finger and studied it thoughtfully, broodingly. Before Bella could blink, I quickly placed my finger in my mouth, tasting her sadness. It was a salty version of heaven!

Bella looked at me questioningly, silently, and I stared into her eyes longingly for a few moments, waiting for her response to my somewhat unusual behaviour. As usual, she seemed to be accepting of my behaviour yet again. I smiled and said, "Do you want to see the rest of the house?"

"No coffins?" she asked sarcastically, trying to hide her underlying anxiety.

I laughed lightly and took her hand in mine. "No coffins," I promised as I led her away from the piano.

I continued to grasp her hand, and walked her up the stairs, taking her down the hallway and showing her each room as we passed. Suddenly, Bella paused at the most significant piece in this house. Bella's bewildered expression at this particular piece caused me to chuckle heartily. It was ironic that we kept a large wooden cross in this house, when our very existence defied any religious teachings. It was on the verge of blasphemous, all things considered.

"You can laugh," I encouraged. "It IS sort of ironic," I added.

Bella did not laugh, but instead reached her hand towards the ancient cross, and though it was out of her reach, she seemed to somehow want to ensure it was real. After all, she was in the home of beings that defied every reality that she had been taught, as if she were stuck in the middle of a dark fairy tale.

"It must be very old," she mused, her eyes scanning every detail of the timber.

"Early sixteen-thirties, more or less," I replied automatically as I casually shrugged.

She stared at me with intent and asked, "Why do you keep this here?"

"Nostalgia. It belonged to Carlisle's father," I responded, which I knew would open up a whole new line of questioning from my curious love. Of course, it's meaning ran far deeper than pure nostalgia.

"He collected antiques?" she asked innocently.

"No. He carved this himself. It hung on the wall above the pulpit where he preached," I finished.

The look of shock that crossed her face was obvious. She stopped and began to think, and once again I needed to know what was going on in that mind of hers, the shock never leaving her features as she found herself unable to speak for a moment. She stared up at the cross, as if mesmerised. My impatient nature finally won out.

"Are you alright?" I asked, worried.

"How old is Carlisle?" she whispered, seemingly ignoring my question.

Of course! The age issue again. Well there was no denying Carlisle's age now that I had mentioned the age of the cross. "He just celebrated his three hundred and sixty-second birthday," I blurted. She finally tore her eyes away from the cross and looked at me, her beautiful eyes burning with curiosity as I watched her carefully. I decided that I may as well tell Bella everything and finally get things out in the open. Thus far, I mused, she had been accepting of everything else.

"Carlisle was born in London, in the sixteen-forties, he believes. Time wasn't marked as accurately then, for the common people anyway. It was just before Cromwell's rule, though."

I studied Bella's face carefully as I spoke, and her outward appearance of composure seemed to be hiding an underlying discomfort, however I felt the need to continue.

"He was the only son of an Anglican pastor. His mother died giving birth to him. His father was an intolerant man. As the Protestants came into power, he was enthusiastic in his persecution of Roman Catholics and other religions. He also believed very strongly in the reality of evil. He led hunts for witches, werewolves.....and vampires," I said as I watched for her reaction of that final word. Though her body grew still, she was still as composed as ever. I pressed on.

"They burned a lot of innocent people – of course the real creatures that he sought were not so easy to catch. When the pastor grew old, he placed his obedient son in charge of the raids. At first Carlisle was a disappointment; he was not quick to accuse, to see demons where they did not exist. But he was persistent, and more clever than his father. He actually discovered a coven of true vampires that lived hidden in the sewers of the city, only coming out by night to hunt. In those days, when monsters were not just myths and legends, that was the way many lived."

"The people gathered their pitchforks and torches, of course," I said as I laughed, though it was not lightly by any means. I could not fathom what the creatures of that day endured, nor the poor humans that surrounded them, "and waited where Carlisle had seen the monsters exit into the street. Eventually one emerged," I said, my voice becoming quiet as I spoke, realising that I was telling a story that I possibly had no right to tell.

_It's alright son, go ahead and tell her the whole story. _Though reluctant, Carlisle's thoughts encouraged me to continue.

"He must have been ancient, and weak with hunger. Carlisle heard him call out in Latin to the others when he caught the scent of the mob. He ran through the streets, and Carlisle – he was twenty-three and very fast – was in the lead of the pursuit. The creature could have easily outrun them, but Carlisle thinks he was too hungry, so he turned and attacked. He fell on Carlisle first, but the others were close behind, and he turned to defend himself. He killed two men, and made off with a third, leaving Carlisle bleeding on the street."

I paused once again, the horror of what had happened to my father overwhelming me for a moment. After all, if his horror had never happened, then I would not be standing here telling Bella this story. I did not belong in this time, yet for the first time was glad that I was here, my very existence mocking the natural laws of nature. I now realised that this cross was not only a symbol of Carlisle's human life, but a representation of each one of us and how we all came to be. And now? Now it meant more to me than ever before, for it's existence meant that I lived in the here and now, with the love of my life. Natural laws be damned!

"Carlisle knew what his father would do. The bodies would be burned – anything infected by the monster must be destroyed. Carlisle acted instinctively to save his own life. He crawled away from the alley while the mob followed the fiend and his victim. He hid in a cellar, buried himself in rotting potatoes for three days. It's a miracle he was able to keep silent, to stay undiscovered. It was over then, and he realised what he had become," I finished, staring at her face, her expression unfathomable as she tore her gaze away from the cross. Perhaps the thought of Carlisle's grisly arrival into his current state had upset her.

"How are you feeling?" I asked.

"I'm fine," she replied reassuringly, biting her lip at the same time in hesitation. I stared into the depths of those curious eyes once again, nearly losing myself in them in the process. I smiled and said "I expect you have a few more questions for me."

"A few," she answered, returning my smile.

This caused my smile to widen to an uninhibited level, and I was unable to do anything but show my teeth to Bella in all their glory. I pulled her back down the hall and said encouragingly, "Come on then, I'll show you."

As we walked towards Carlisle's office, I felt elated. Every little bit of information that I had shared with Bella today made me feel lighter, relieved, and above all, accepted. In my hundred years of existence, I had never felt this way before, for all the time that we existed, we needed to be careful of what we did, said, and thought around humans. My confessions had made me feel, in a word, liberated. And this? This was only the beginning.....

**A/N: Please also don't forget to read and review Within These Walls folks! Thanks!! (Oh, and this too - I need to know if you'd like me to continue - I REALLY need to be writing chapter 12 of my novel you know!)**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Well this may be the last chapter I write for a while as I'm due to move house in the next few weeks and have to pack and clean! Fun stuff! Please read and review because for me to continue I want to reach the magical figure of at least 70 in total when I get my internet access back once again. Thank you Totteacher for encouraging me so much lately – I'm not exactly a fan of my own writing! Maybe I will find time to do one more chappie before I go offline for a few days – it's up to you guys to encourage me to do so with a review!**

**STORY ALERT: Chapter 4 of Within These Walls has been posted - please read and review our collaboration!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. Darn it all to heck!**

EPOV

We stood outside Carlisle's office hand-in-hand, and before I need knock, Carlisle said, "Come in."

Bella smiled as I opened the door to let her in, her eyes roaming the room with its vast collection of books as its focal point. Her mouth dropped open as she stared in wonder at the volumes gracing each shelf until she finally cast her gaze towards Carlisle, who was seated at his usual position behind his desk.

"What can I do for you?" he asked as he rose from his chair, placing a bookmark in a medical book on allergies. I smiled. Carlisle was forever trying to solve the problems of the world, mine included.

"I wanted to show Bella some of our history," I replied, then added, "Well your history actually."

"We didn't mean to disturb you," Bella said apologetically.

"Not at all," replied Carlisle. "Where are you going to start?"_ I would not be too specific about the Volturi Edward. You do not want to frighten the poor girl. Remember, we have broken a rule here and must protect our family._

I nodded in acknowledgement of his thoughts and said, "The Waggoner," as I placed my hand on Bella's shoulder and turned her around to look back toward the door we had just come through. Her heart reacted to my touch, so much so that I was concerned if she was alright. Her blush was lovely and as she glanced sheepishly towards Carlisle, I realised that she was concerned that Carlisle could hear her heart just as well as I could. Ah, if only we were alone!

_Oh my goodness son, is she alright? Does this happen every time you touch her?_

I nodded once in his direction as I took Bella's hand in mine, directing her toward the first painting. I watched as Bella took it in, and she seemed confused as to what this depicted.

"London in the sixteen-fifties," I explained, the painting showing examples of typical English buildings of the time, many of which still exist to this day, surrounded by the Thames in the foreground, over which sat London Bridge, with the northern end damaged by fire in 1633.

"The London of my youth," Carlisle added, knowing that Bella was already aware of his age. In reaction Bella flinched, and, squeezing her hand in assurance, I realised that this still must be a lot for her to comprehend.

"Will YOU tell the story?" I asked of Carlisle. Bella turned to wait for his answer. _Oh, no, you're not roping me in on this one Edward. I don't want to be responsible for her having heart failure. She's all yours!_

Carlisle smiled at Bella and said, "I would, but I'm actually running a bit late. The hospital called this morning – Dr. Snow is taking a sick day. Besides you know the stories as well as I do," he added, grinning at me defiantly, his embellishment though irritating, was understandable. He turned his gaze towards Bella, whose thoughts seemed to be racing through her mind, evident in her eyes' distraction and her elevated heartbeat, and bid her farewell, leaving me with the responsibility of telling Bella about our history.

"What happened then? When he realised what had happened to him?" she asked. I glanced at the paintings, feeling her gaze follow mine as I fixed my eyes on the landscape painting which had a cliff face in the distance. Carlisle had kept this painting, as a reminder of his own death wish when he was first created.

Thoughts raced through my mind of Carlisle's suffering, and his torment once he had realised what he had become. I felt so sad for him. Unlike the rest of us, Carlisle had no-one to comfort him, no-one to inform him of what to expect. He only had the fear. Fear that he would be tracked down and slaughtered just as he had tried to do to the monsters in his human life. He was alone and had to deal with his new self without a scrap of insight, and later he would use that same insight to make it easier for the rest of us when we became newborns. Carlisle was and always will be the most compassionate man I had ever known. And the most resilient of us all.

"When he knew what he had become, he rebelled against it," I said in quiet reverence as I gazed at the painting. "He tried to destroy himself. But that's not easily done." And I knew that more than anyone. Since knowing Bella Swan, I knew that my life would not be worth living if she were to die, and I had made concerted efforts to find out everything I could about how one such as I could in fact kill himself. In my research, I had arrived at the unfortunate conclusion that killing oneself was impossible, and would require the assistance of others.

"How?" Bella asked, reading my train of thought yet again. I could not believe how Bella's intuitive nature seemed to be in line with what I was thinking. An errant thought crossed my mind as to how this seemingly unique talent, along with her ability to repel my mind reading abilities, would reveal itself were she to become a vampire. My throat tightened at that very thought, for if Bella were to ever adopt the life of a vampire, I knew that I would be directly responsible for destroying the very soul of this angel. A soul that I myself would die to protect. I brought my thoughts back to the here and now as I realised that Bella was waiting for my answer.

"He jumped from great heights. He tried to drown himself in the ocean....but he was young to the new life, and very strong. It is amazing that he was able to resist....feeding....while he was still so new. The instinct is more powerful then, it takes over everything. But he was so repelled by himself that he had the strength to try to kill himself with starvation."

"Is that possible?" Bella asked, her voice faint without a hint of strength behind it.

"No," I answered regretfully. "There are very few ways we can be killed."

Bella opened her mouth to no doubt ask how in fact we can be killed, but I stopped her before she could speak by pressing on with the story. "So he grew very hungry, and eventually weak. He strayed as far as he could from the human populace, recognising that his willpower was weakening, too. For months he wandered by night, seeking the loneliest places, loathing himself," I said, hoping that Bella would not press for further explanation. I needed to change the direction of this conversation, so I began to tell her of how Carlisle came to feed from animals.

"One night a herd of deer passed his hiding place. He was so wild with thirst that he attacked without a thought. His strength returned and he realised there was an alternative to being the vile monster he feared. Had he not eaten venison in his former life? Over the next months his new philosophy was born. He could exist without being a demon. He found himself again."

I watched as Bella smiled in relief as she stared at the painting, her thoughts miles away once again, her fascination with this story ever-present. I continued, feeding her fascination.

"He began to make better use of his time. He'd always been intelligent, eager to learn. Now he had unlimited time before him. He studied by night, planned by day. He swam to France and...."

Bella gasped, her scent surrounding me as she whirled around and said, "He SWAM to France?"

I took a moment to compose myself, my desires once again welling up within me. I wanted to take her in my arms and hold her, press her to the desk, have her then and there. My mind digressing as it did made me feel shameful, but at the same time more human than ever.

"People swim the Channel all the time Bella," I reminded her gently, my animal inside waiting to pounce with every word I spoke.

"That's true, I guess. It just sounded funny in that context. Go on," she said, her apparent realisation of vampires being better swimmers never having occurred to her before this moment.

"Swimming is easy for us...." I said, Bella's face changing from a look of curiosity to one of annoyance.

"Everything is easy for YOU," she whined, rudely interrupting my sentence, her statement amusing me to the point of distraction. A distraction that I welcomed, to detract from my desirous thoughts. I waited for her to see if she needed to vent further, but apparently my expression had stopped her in her tracks.

"I won't interrupt again, I promise," she said finally.

I chuckled at her words, knowing that she would not be able to keep her promise, and finished my sentence. "Because technically, we don't need to breathe," I stated, waiting for the next onslaught of questions. She didn't fail in her duty.

"You....."

"No, no," I interrupted, "You promised," I added, laughing heartily at her as I put my finger to her mouth. A mouth I wanted to take in mine once again, to feel its warmth, to be surrounded by yet again. "Do you want to hear the story or not," I added, trying to distract myself from my desires as always. Of course, I knew that the male population of Forks High School often thought about the opposite sex, but I wondered if human males always thought this way for the rest of their lives? Though I had read about male desires in books, to experience these feelings was yet another thing entirely. I constantly thought about how I could hold her, kiss her, touch her, and more. My feelings within seemed to burst at the seams at times, confusion and excitement seemingly part of my every thought, every wish, and the relentless burning seemed to further accentuate my desires.

"You can't expect to spring something like that on me, and then expect me not to say anything," she argued, her sweet breath surrounding my finger as she spoke. I could not help but to bring my hand to rest on her soft throat, to the centre of my world. Of course, her racing heart once again told me what her voice would not, but her expression was one of determination.

"You don't have to BREATHE?" she asked demandingly.

"No, it's not necessary. Just a habit," I replied, nonchalantly shrugging as if it were an insignificant part of being a vampire. Of course, as far as Bella Swan was concerned, how could ANYTHING about a vampire be insignificant?

Her heart picked up its pace as she asked, "How long can you go.....without BREATHING?"

How long indeed. How long was a piece of string? "Indefinitely, I suppose; I don't know. It gets a bit uncomfortable – being without a sense of smell," I replied, watching for her response as I felt her heart thudding under my touch, and the rushing blood causing my fingers to tingle as it pulsated through her veins.

"A bit uncomfortable," she repeated, her expression unfathomable. Was Bella realising at last that she was not dating the average pimply faced teenage boy? I dropped my hand to my side as I pondered. My mind wandered to Mike Newton, and what a boy such as him could offer her that I could not. For one, a pulse, and secondly a warm embrace. And thirdly a future......oh the list could just go on. I suddenly became still and unmoving, the stress of her sacrifice to be with me rearing its ugly head for the umpteenth time, the fear of her running away screaming prevalent.

"What is it?" she whispered, reaching out and touching my face with tender care.

I sighed, her soothing touch softening my stance, and said, "I keep waiting for it to happen."

She stared at me, her eyes longing to give comfort, and said, "For what to happen?"

I returned my gaze, trying to decipher her thoughts yet again and said, "I know that at some point, something I tell you or something you see is going to be too much. And then you'll run away from me, screaming as you go," I said, the insecure thoughts flooding my mind as I spoke. I tried to smile at Bella, but knew that it fell short of being genuine. "I won't stop you. I want this to happen, because I want you to be safe," I said, then added, conflicted, "And yet, I want to be with you. The two desires are impossible to reconcile...." I said, trailing off as I took her expression in once again, waiting in desperation for her response.

"I'm not running anywhere," she said genuinely, and though I believed that was she said was the truth, I kept waiting for the moment when the truth would be overruled by her justifiable fear.

"We'll see," I replied, smiling knowingly at her.

Her response was a frown, and seemingly wanting to evade the subject of her running for the hills, she said, "So go on – Carlisle was swimming to France...."

I paused, considering Carlisle's request as to how much EXACTLY I should divulge to Bella about the Volturi, their elaborate gold framed portrait drawing my gaze in as Bella watched me with intent. Her eyes once again followed mine and she let out a small gasp, one which she herself would be pressed to notice.

"Carlisle swam to France, and continued on through Europe, to the universities there. By night he studied music, science, medicine – and found his calling, his penance, in that, in saving human lives."

I studied the painting with intent, the images of the good that Carlisle had achieved flashing through my mind. No-one more than Carlisle deserved to be canonised, if that were at all possible. "I can't adequately describe the struggle; it took Carlisle centuries of torturous effort to perfect his self-control. Now he is all but immune to the scent of human blood, and he is able to do the work he loves without agony. He finds a great deal of peace there, at the hospital...." I said, trailing off as I thought about Carlisle overcoming a struggle that I could not ever imagine achieving, and though I had managed to become desensitised to Bella's scent somewhat, I could not ever fathom reaching the pinnacle that Carlisle had...to be so immune that you could tolerate spilled blood on a daily basis. I pondered for a while, then realised that Bella was waiting for me to continue.

I pointed at the painting, tapping my finger on the portrait of those who professed to lead our kind...the Volturi. "He was studying in Italy when he discovered the others there. They were much more civilised and educated that the wraiths of the London sewers." Of course, their civilised exterior did not detract from the fact that they were power hungry monsters of the very worst kind. Ones who decreed unto themselves the power to rule and dictate over every vampire in existence.

Bella let out a nervous laugh in recognition as my fingers pointed out the Volturi who stood in dominance on the balcony in the portrait. "Solimena was greatly inspired by Carlisle's friends. He often painted them as gods," I said, chuckling at the very thought of these self-obsessed vampires thinking of themselves in that light. "Aro, Marcus, Caius," I said, pointing each one out individually as I spoke. "Nighttime patrons of the arts," I deciphered loosely for Bella's benefit, failing to tell her what they really were, what they truly professed to be, and what real danger they posed if they became aware of Bella's knowledge of our existence.

"What happened to them?" Bella asked as she reached her hand out to touch the portrait, only to falter at touching it at the very last moment. Perhaps she sensed that there was more to this bunch than what I had revealed, and once again had seen through my deceit.

"They're still there," I answered honestly, shrugging casually. "As they have been for who knows how many millennia. Carlisle stayed with them for only a short time, just a few decades. He greatly admired their civility, their refinement, but they persisted on trying to cure his aversion to 'his natural food source' as they called it. They tried to persuade him, and he tried to persuade them, to no avail. At that point, Carlisle decided to try the New World. He dreamed of finding others like himself. He was very lonely, you see," I said, trying to justify what Carlisle was to do next. The decision that he made that would change the destiny of Bella and I.

"He didn't find anyone for a long time. But, as monsters became the stuff of fairy tales, he found that he could interact with unsuspecting humans as if he were one of them. He began practicing medicine. But the companionship he craved evaded him; he couldn't risk familiarity," I said finally, considering taking the opportunity to tell Bella further details of my change. As I watched her response, I was still amazed how she exuded peace and tranquillity, as if I was telling her something of a mundane nature. She was incredible!

"When the influenza epidemic hit, he was working nights in a hospital in Chicago. He'd been turning over an idea in his mind for several years, and he had almost decided to act – since he couldn't find a companion, he would create one," I said, cringing as I spoke. Still, she emitted an aura of calm, her eyes urging me to continue. "He wasn't absolutely sure how his own transformation had occurred, so he was hesitant. And he was loath to steal anyone's life the way his life had been stolen. It was in that frame of mind that he found me. There was no hope for me; I was left in a ward with the dying. He had nursed my parents, and knew I was alone. He decided to try...." I whispered, my voice trailing off as thoughts once again invaded my mind of the outcome of Carlisle's decisions at that time. I stared out of the window and remembered. The horror of the pain I felt. The mourning that I knew I had experienced at the loss of my parents, memories that were now a mere whisper that lay within the far reaches of my mind. The incessant longing for the blood of a human. The rebellion against this lifestyle that drove me away from the comfort of my family. And finally, the moment when Bella walked into the Forks High School cafeteria, nullifying all the other pain and loss that I had experienced up until that one pivotal moment.

"And so we've come full circle," I concluded finally as I turned toward my love once again. The one reason that made Carlisle's choices so very right.

And just like that, Bella once again appeared to have read my mind. "Have you always stayed with Carlisle, then?" she asked, her eyes burning with curiosity.

"Almost always," I replied, placing my hand on Bella's waist, taking her along with me through the door. Bella glanced back to the paintings, the longing in her eyes still there, the curiosity seemingly elevated by my actions.

We walked in silence down the hall for a moment, before Bella could no longer hold her tongue. "Almost?" she asked finally.

I sighed, conceding that she was not going to stop until I had given her a complete answer. I needed her to know me, no doubt, but for Bella to know my very darkest side? That frightened me more than anything. "Well I had a typical bout of rebellious adolescence – about ten years after I was....born....created, whatever you want to call it. I wasn't sold on his life of abstinence, and I resented him for curbing my appetite. So I went off on my own for a time," I said, hoping that my answer would suffice. Of course, Bella would not rest until she heard the story in its entirety.

"Really?" she said, intrigued. Why she was not frightened was beyond me! We headed up the next flight of stairs toward the other place I wanted to share with Bella.....my room.

"That doesn't repulse you?" I asked, waiting for her answer with a tinge of anxiety.

"No," she replied evenly.

"Why not?" I asked, unable to understand her candour.

"I guess....it sounds reasonable," she finished.

I could not help but laugh at her response, so loudly that she appeared somewhat taken aback. Would this woman ever cease to amaze me? We were at the top of the stairs and I watched her as she hesitated, staring down the hallway as I felt shameful of my actions of the past, and wanted Bella to know my thinking behind them.

"From the time of my new birth," I murmured, "I had the advantage of knowing what everyone around me was thinking, both human and non-human alike. That's why it took me ten years to defy Carlisle – I could read his perfect sincerity, understand exactly why he lived the way he did." I recalled the torture that I endured after tearing myself away from his side, and how when I was gone, I mourned for the loss of him, and for the loss of my innocence, for I was then unleashed on the world as a predator of the worst kind.

"It took me only a few years to return to Carlisle and recommit to his vision. I thought I would be exempt from the....depression....that accompanies a conscience. Because I knew the thoughts of my prey, I could pass over the innocent and pursue only the evil. If I followed a murderer down a dark alley where he stalked a young girl – if I saved her, then surely I wasn't so terrible," I added, trying to justify my errant behaviour to Bella when I myself was far from convinced.

Bella shivered, no doubt imagining the monster that I truly was. I wanted to comfort her, but also felt compelled to continue to the conclusion.

"But as time went on, I began to see the monster in my eyes. I couldn't escape the debt of so much human life taken, no matter how justified. And I went back to Carlisle and Esme. They welcomed me back like the prodigal. It was more than I deserved," I whispered, grateful that they had in fact accepted me despite my behaviour. It was at that moment that I felt a strange sense of relief wash through me and as though it were fate, we stopped at the door of the place I needed to share with Bella. "My room," I said as I opened the door and pulled her through, my hand still upon her waist.

I watched her in silence as she walked away from me and gazed through the ceiling high windows that faced the river and through to the mountains. I waited as she absorbed the surrounds of my room, her eyes scanning over every detail of its contents. I smiled inwardly as the relief continued to find its way through every part of my body. She was still here, and had accepted every part of me!

As she stared at the couch and the floor, she queried, "Good acoustics?" My smile widened and I nodded yes to her as I chuckled, unable to control my pleasure at the sight of her within this room. I picked up the remote to the sound system and pressed play, the soft notes of Nat King Cole's music echoing through the room.

"How do you have these organised?" she asked, her eyes averted from mine as she scanned the collection of CD's as my thoughts of this woman's acceptance still rang through my mind.

"Umm...by year and by personal preference within that frame," I replied vaguely, barely interested in the subject of my CD cataloguing system as my eyes stared at her in wonderment. I was happy. Truly happy!

Realising that I was somewhat distracted, she turned to face me and said, "What?" What indeed.

"I was prepared to feel....relieved. Having you know about everything, not needing to keep secrets from you. But I didn't expect to feel more than that. I LIKE it. It makes me....happy," I said, shrugging my shoulders, and smiling at the woman I loved.

"I'm glad," she replied, returning a beautiful smile that would make any man fall to his knees.

And then I wondered. Had she really seen all of me? After all, my human facade was all that I had shown her, except for the running. My brows creased in response to my realisation. There were still layers to be removed, that were still beneath surface waiting to be unveiled in their entirety. Would she, could she, endure that?

"You're still waiting for the running and screaming, aren't you?" she said, reading me like a book.

I nodded at her, trying to smile at the same time.

"I hate to burst your bubble, but you're not really as scary as you think you are. I don't find you scary at all actually," she said. Was she KIDDING? What would make her realise just what sort of monster I was? My brows now raised in response to her challenge, I smiled at her wickedly and far too broadly. This was going to be good.

"You REALLY shouldn't have said that," I chuckled. If a first-hand demonstration was the only way to convince her, then that was what she would get.

I growled in response to the challenge laid before me and shifted my stance and crouched, ready to pounce, showing her my teeth in all their glory, which sat beneath my snarling lips. Instead of fear, Bella showed defiance as she backed away, glaring at me as she said, "You wouldn't."

With lightning speed I leapt at her, taking her in my arms along the way, our bodies crashing into the sofa. All the while I held her tightly, protecting her from harm.

_Edward! What the hell are you doing?_

Ignoring Alice's thoughts, I instead gripped a gasping Bella in my arms tightly, never wanting to let her go. She continued to glare at me alarmingly, so I smiled at her to allay her response.

"You were saying?" I growled at her.

"That you are a very, very terrifying monster," Bella said sarcastically, still trying to catch her breath.

"Much better," I replied approvingly, the warmth of her body nearly bringing me undone once again.

_I'm coming up Edward! Don't try to stop me!! _Well that put a stop to that thought!

"Um, can I get up now?" Bella asked as she struggled against my hold. I laughed in response, waiting for the onslaught that was Alice to appear at the door.

"Can we come in?" Alice said softly.

Unable to let her go, I moved Bella so that she sat on my lap, her warmth flowing along with the electricity once again, and if there weren't a houseful of vampires I would be acting on my raw feelings.

Still chuckling, I said, "Go ahead."

Alice walked through the door and sat on the floor in the middle of the room, while Jasper hesitated at the doorway, glancing once again at Bella's blushing face as a look of shock ran across his.

_You feeling alright Edward? You scared me for a bit there _Jasper thought as he stared at me.

"It sounded like you were having Bella for lunch and we came to see if you would share," Alice said.

Oh I was more than intending to have her for lunch! Bella stiffened in my arms in response and I grinned at the very thought of what I would like to do if we were alone. Yet again, my animalistic thoughts began to take over everything else. "Sorry, I don't believe I have enough to spare," I said possessively, my arms holding Bella tighter as I spoke.

"Actually," Jasper said, smiling as I watching him with intent as he walked into the room. "Alice says there's going to be a real storm tonight, and Emmett wants to play ball. Are you game?" he challenged.

Bella stared at me, confusion etched in her features.

_Please say yes. There's going to be a storm and I want Bella to come play! Jasper and Rosalie will just have to put up with it! _Alice shouted within her mind.

I hesitated, not wanting to leave Bella. In fact I did not want to leave from this very spot. "Of course you should bring Bella," Alice said happily, trying to nudge me to move. I noted that Jasper glanced at Alice. _If you settle down there Edward, I don't mind if she comes._

"Do you want to go?" I asked Bella excitedly, once again overwhelmed by the prospect of sharing something with her that I enjoyed.

"Sure," she replied. "Um, where are we going?" she asked further.

"We have to wait for thunder to play ball – you'll see why," I promised, marvelling at the very thought of Bella witnessing another of my unique abilities. I wanted her to see us play. That would reinforce her acceptance of me further.

"Will I need an umbrella?" she asked. _Oh, how cute! _Alice's thoughts and Bella's statement suddenly brought me undone. We all laughed out loud in unison, our amusement at Bella's human frailties endearing to each one of us.

_Don't worry Edward, I'll reassure her. _Ah Jasper! Always wanting to even things out.

"Will she?" Jasper asked Alice, playing along with enthusiasm.

_Bella seems a little anxious. I'll help her a little... _Jasper insisted.

"No," Alice replied positively. "The storm will hit over town. It should be dry enough in the clearing."

"Good then," Jasper said out loud as he used his gift a little on us, making Bella appear eager rather than petrified.

"Let's go see if Carlisle will come," Alice said as she danced towards the door.

"Like you don't know," Jasper teased, somewhat pleased with himself as he walked out the door and closed it behind him.

"What will we be playing?" Bella demanded.

"YOU will be watching," I clarified. "We will be playing baseball."

Bella rolled her eyes in response, charming me once again with her reaction. "Vampires like baseball?"

"It's the American pastime," I replied simply, somewhat mockingly as I continued to hold her tightly in my grasp. I never wanted this moment to end, but at the same time looked forward to what we were to do next. I was going to take my Bella to her home and I was going to meet her father, and that was something I needed more in this moment than anything. I needed his approval, wanted him to like me, and moreover, craved to be a part of Bella's family.

*****

As I drove the truck, which was lurching as we approached the top of the street, I turned on the wipers to repel the drizzle that had begun to fall. I smiled to myself as I recalled Bella's question regarding the need for an umbrella. Then, it happened.

_Who the hell does he think he is? Coming into town like he owns the place! Filthy bloodsucker!_

_I wonder if Bella's going to be here soon. I hope she doesn't realise why I'm here. She's so...._

I recognised who these voices belonged to immediately. As we approached Bella's home, in an instant I knew who was there, the black truck taking up the room in the driveway in arrogance of that knowledge. "What the hell are the Blacks doing here?" I muttered under my breath, my words too low for Bella to hear.

I parked the truck on the curb and waited, wondering what to do next. The older man in the wheelchair, who I knew would surely be Billy, though appearing frail, had a strong almost regal appearance. His expression was stone-like, a reflection no doubt of mine, and the younger boy who I ascertained as being Jacob Black stood behind him, mortification rife across his child-like features. Of course, both of these men were direct descendants of the chief of the Quileutes, Ephraim Black, with whom we had made a truce many years before, and though I knew that they were friends of Bella's family, I suspected that this visit was far from social. What were they going to do about me? Would they defy the treaty and have me hunted down, or worse still, start a war? This part of town was not within their boundaries, and yet, here they were, challenging me as if I had breached the treaty nonetheless.

"This is crossing the line," I said through clenched teeth, the fury within threatening to be unleashed upon these men.

_Who is THAT? Bella didn't tell me that was why she wanted to know about the Cullens!_

_How DARE he think that he can corrupt the innocence of this unsuspecting child! The tribe will hear of this...and so will Charlie! I have to warn Bella. She can't possibly be thinking rationally. Either that, or she has no idea...._

"He came to warn Charlie?" Bella guessed, correctly as was her way. The look on her face was one of horror as she realised the precarious situation that we had found ourselves in. I nodded once as I glared at Billy, never taking my eyes off him, the gauntlet well and truly being thrown down by their mere presence. I was seething.

"Let me deal with this," Bella suggested gently, no doubt sensing my unbridled anger. I did not take my eyes off the man. I was so wild with fury that I worried I may do something I would regret, that would hurt Bella or Charlie.

"That's probably best," I conceded. "Be careful, though. The child has no idea." He did have one idea though. He was smitten with Bella, his thoughts crystal clear on that matter.

Bella reacted to what I said, her expression indignant as she reminded me, "Jacob is not that much younger than I am." Of course, she was correct. The boy was just that. A boy. A young man who was much closer in age to Bella than I. A young man who could offer a young girl like Bella the world. I also knew that she cared for him, and so I would be civil. For her. For now.

"Oh, I know," I replied, grinning at Bella, trying, for her, to suppress my anger as best I could. Bella sighed and put her hand on the door handle. I did not want her to leave, but knew that this mess had to be handled, and handled before Charlie's return. Meeting Charlie would have to wait. And then it occurred to me. What exactly COULD Billy warn Charlie about? Revealing us to him would break the treaty. Was the tribe looking for a war? I needed to be away from this situation to think rationally, for I did not trust myself to meet these men here without doing something that would damage everything that Bella and I, and for that matter my family, had built together.

"Get them inside so I can leave," I instructed. "I'll be back around dusk," I added, those words near breaking my heart. I hoped that Bella would remain safe, and that she would somehow manage to be rid of these two interlopers as quickly and painlessly as possible.

"Do you want my truck?" she offered selflessly, impractically, causing me to roll my eyes.

"I could WALK home faster than this truck moves," I groaned in frustration.

"You don't have to leave," Bella said wistfully, her face appearing glum. Of course I had a choice. Doing the right thing was never easy. Leaving Bella alone was even harder.

I smiled at her, giving every effort I could to keep her happy. "Actually I do. After you get rid of them," I said as I glanced at Billy once again, "You still have to prepare Charlie to meet your new boyfriend." I grinned widely at Bella, my happiness at this prospect making me forget about the present company for a brief moment.

"Thanks a lot," she groaned in protest, no doubt annoyed at the responsibility that now sat squarely on her shoulders. Not only would she need to be rid of Billy and Jacob, she would now have to broach the subject of introducing me to Charlie Swan as her boyfriend. Ah, poor Bella!

I smiled at her yet again, which seemed to melt her resolve somewhat. "I'll be back soon," I promised reassuringly. And with that, I decided to let Billy and his child know in no uncertain terms that Bella was mine. I glanced toward them, making sure I had an audience, and leant in and kissed Bella under the edge of her jaw, stopping myself short of kissing her passionately on the lips. In response, Bella's heart raced yet again as she glanced towards the porch. I smiled evilly as I saw Billy's hands clutch the armrests of his wheelchair to such a point that it would not have surprised me if he had torn them off.

_He won't have her for long! Charlie and I will see to that! _

_Oh man! _Jacob appeared embarrassed, not only from the kiss he just witnessed, but from the behaviour of his father. I was pleased that he did not believe the stories of his forefathers. I hoped that his mindset would not falter, and prayed that Bella would be safe in my absence.

"SOON," Bella stressed as she finally opened the door and stepped out into the rain. I clutched the door handle, stopping myself to within an inch of my life from following her into the rain. The pull of her tugged at my heartstrings, but I had no choice but to wait patiently until she got them inside. My eyes followed her every move as I watched her approach the porch, the rain though stifling my vision, could not mask Billy's displeasure.

"Hey Billy. Hi Jacob," Bella said, cheerfully greeting them as if it were a social visit, nothing more. "Charlie's gone for the day – I hope you haven't been waiting long," she added, smiling genuinely.

"Not long," Billy said, subdued, defying his angered features. "I just wanted to bring this up," he said, his expression seemingly taking Bella by surprise as he indicated a brown paper sack resting on his lap.

"Thanks," she replied. "Why don't you come in for a minute and dry off?" she added hurriedly as she waved them in ahead of her. Oh, she was good. And I said she couldn't act. I laughed momentarily, though in defiance of my outward demeanour, my heart ached in her absence.

"Here, let me take that," she offered kindly, turning to the door as she spoke. Just before she shut the door, she took one last longing look at me, the love pouring out of me in response unhindered. My eyes closed in unison with the door, the pain flowing through my every muscle as I felt the loss of her overwhelm me, drown me.

"_You'll want to put that in the fridge," _Billy said, their conversation within the house still audible. _"It's some of Harry Clearwater's homemade fish fry – Charlie's favourite. The fridge keeps it drier."_

"_Thanks," _Bella replied. _"I was running out of new ways to fix fish, and he's bound to bring home more tonight."_

As I listened, I got out of the truck slowly, waiting for the inevitable tough questions as the rain trickled down my neck and soaked through my shirt. Instead, I overhead them discussing where Charlie fished and how he had changed locations. Bella was good. She had told Billy that Charlie was trying a new fishing spot after he had threatened to call by and see him. Very good.

_How am I going to tell her? Jake need not hear this._

"_Jake, why don't you go get that new picture of Rebecca out of the car? I'll leave that for Charlie too," _Billy said all too casually.

_Sheesh – I have to get wet again? Is he trying to keep me away from Bella?_

I smiled as I heard the innocent thoughts of Jacob. He had such an innocent timbre to him, yet I could picture him being very corruptible in the wrong company. Poor boy. I recalled just how he could be manipulated when Bella had informed me of how she came to find out the truth about my family.

"_Where is it?" _Jacob asked, his voice sounding morose.

"_I think I saw it in the trunk. You may have to dig for it," _Billy said, my suspicions that he was trying to be rid of his son to talk to Bella becoming clearer. As soon as Jacob took steps to the door, I ran to the safety of the bushes, watching him as he searched the car in vain, of course, never to find the photograph he sought.

I listened. Bella's heart rate seemed to be increasing, as she said curtly, _"Charlie won't be back for a long time."_

Once again, a silent pause. _"Thanks again for the fish fry," _Bella said, no doubt trying to wind things up and be rid of Billy.

_Well, sitting here is getting me nowhere. Here goes nothing._

"_Bella. Charlie is one of my best friends," _he started.

"_Yes,"_ Bella replied, her tone unwavering.

"_I noticed you've been spending time with one of the Cullens."_

"_Yes," _she repeated, her voice almost monotone.

"_Maybe it's none of my business, but I don't think that is such a good idea."_

"_You're right. It IS none of your business," _Bella said as her voice came to life, championing our cause. I loved her so much.

_How do I tell her this without revealing them for who they are? How much does she know?_

"_You probably don't know this, but the Cullen family has an unpleasant reputation on the reservation," _Billy said, his voice hesitative.

And then, Bella's open defiance once again surprised me. _"Actually, I did know that. But that reputation couldn't be deserved, could it? Because the Cullens never set foot on the reservation do they?" _There it was. My brave Bella reminding the Quileutes of their obligations in regards to the treaty. I could not have done a better job of this if I tried.

_Oh, no. She knows? How is this possible? _I could just imagine the look of surprise and shock on Billy's face. Oh how I wished I was a fly on the wall! I smiled widely, admiring Bella's calm, well thought out and knowledgeable reasoning. I was sure that he would not have expected this from her, no doubt thinking that Bella was as oblivious to everything around her as Jacob Black was. That could not be further from the truth. I continued to observe Jacob as he rifled through the car, his thoughts becoming more and more frustrated as he the rain continued to drench him. I cupped my hand over my mouth, trying to stop myself from laughing, though quite a loud smirk did escape my lips. Just as I did this, Jacob immediately stopped what he was doing and turned towards me, staring into the bushes that I was certain camouflaged me, yet his eyes told me otherwise. I needed to get out of there fast.

_What was that? _He shut the trunk and walked towards where I stood, causing me to flee in an instant. "Anyone there?" he asked, his voice now in the distance as I ran swiftly away from him. I decided to wait until they were gone before I returned, and would take the opportunity to change for our baseball game. I knew in my heart that Bella had things under control, and trusted that she would handle the infamous Billy Black, and his hormonally-charged and somewhat perceptive son.

As I entered my room, there was a note stuck on the door. The family were already headed to the clearing when I arrived home, their enthusiasm to start the game causing me to chuckle.

_Take my Jeep Edward. We'll be waiting. Oh and by the way, don't forget, Rose will be here too. Alice told me Bella's coming - just giving you a heads up bro! Em._

I balled the note up in my hand and threw it in waste paper basket, all known emotions suddenly flooding through me as I went to the bathroom to clean up and change. I stared at my face in the mirror and noted my expression, which was one of happiness. I was to meet Charlie Swan and therefore commence a hopefully fruitful relationship with him. I was to take Bella Swan on our first official date, with her father's permission, no less. And, I was to share my family's favourite game with her and my ENTIRE family. Thoughts of Rosalie's anger invaded my happy disposition, only to disappear in a fleeting moment, for I knew one thing in my heart. No matter who objected, I was forever bound to Miss Bella Swan, and no-one, whether they be of human, vampire or Quileute origin, would ever take her away from me. I took one last glance at my smiling face before I left my room, hopeful that today would be just as I anticipated.

**A/N: Remember....reviews please! **


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Well, I'm trying to squeeze one more chapter in before I start a-packin! To my dedicated reviewers – I REALLY appreciate you taking the time to let me know what you think. You guys are AWESOME!**

**Totteacher: as always – thanks a million for your wonderful words of encouragement, including the review of the century! Chapter 5 of our story Within These Walls has been posted and it's getting exciting folks! So if you want a good read....please go to the story through one of our profiles. Go on...you know you want to!**

**Disclaimer: **

**There was a young girl from Oz,**

**Who wanted to write Twilight because,**

**She got hooked on the book,**

**Then took a good look,**

**And realised she was not all that soz!**

**Basically this limerick means that I don't own Twilight or its characters even though I love to write it! Heheheh...**

EPOV

As I drove Emmett's Jeep through town, my anticipation palpable, I could do nothing but smile. I was on the precipice of getting more than I could ever want in a hundred lifetimes. Ah, yes, I was truly blessed. All obstacles that had been in the way of Bella and I being together were slowly but surely being circumvented, as if aided by a higher power. This gave me pause to think. Bella was a good person, and though I was not religious by any means and knew that my soul was beyond salvation and, as a matter of fact, long gone, I wondered if somehow being part of her life had allowed me to be privy to something that I otherwise would not have dared dream. I wondered if the right of Bella's existence somehow nullified the wrong of mine. It was certainly something to consider.

As I approached the top of the familiar street, my stomach tightened as I recalled the most recent guests who had visited the Swan household. Recent uninvited guests, more to the point. Suddenly I was on full alert, watching and listening for signs of the Blacks' presence. My body relaxed as I realised they were long gone, and I was thankful that I only heard the combined sounds of voices and thoughts belonging to those who lived in this street. Voices that I had become so familiar with over these past weeks that I felt I personally knew the people behind them. I expertly filtered out the din, and honed in on the sounds that had become most important to me.

"_What did you do with yourself today?" _Charlie asked. As I heard his question, I decided to pull over to the curb to ensure that Bella had told her father about me and about our proposed date. Arriving prior to her explanation would not do. I listened intently...

"_Well, this afternoon I just hung around the house....and this morning I was over at the Cullens',"_ Bella replied nervously as Charlie dropped a fork onto his dinner plate. I could sense that he was a tightened spring ready to uncoil, the tension in his thoughts though muffled, rang loud and clear to me. I cringed. This was not exactly the reaction I had hoped for, but was not entirely unexpected either.

"_Dr Cullen's place?" _Charlie asked, his voice surprised and filled with the tension that ran through his mind. I could picture that fork being bent in half if it were still in Charlie's hand.

"_Yeah," _Bella replied quickly as though she were quickly tearing a bandage off her tender skin.

"_What were you doing there?" _he asked anxiously, filtering his building anger to a more controlled level for the benefit of his daughter.

"_Well I sort of have a date with Edward Cullen tonight and he wanted to introduce me to his parents," _she blurted. For a moment, there was no response from him. _"Dad?"_ she said, waiting for his reaction. Still, he did not speak, but I did not need to hear his words to know how truly upset he was. _"Dad, are you alright?"_ Bella said alarmingly.

My hands gripped the steering wheel, and I had to stop myself from breaking it off its mounting as I waited for the oncoming tirade. _"You are going out with Edward Cullen?" _he screamed angrily. I huffed and clenched the steering wheel tighter in frustration, threatening to crush it in my hands. Of course, how could I think that this man would want to accept me into his daughter's life? As soon as Bella had mentioned my family's name, his thoughts had turned to anger. It appeared as though my dream of becoming close to this man may have been within the realms of fantasy after all. How could I expect otherwise? Any human would react in the same way to the Cullens, even in just meeting us, let alone if a daughter of theirs ever wished to date one of us.

"_I thought you liked the Cullens," _Bella argued with futility. It mattered not what the local Police Chief thought of the town Doctor, and though I was certain that their working relationship was courteous and professional, Charlie Swan did not want me, Edward Cullen, dating his daughter. That was another prospect entirely. Agonised by his reaction, I dropped my head onto the steering wheel in despair. If I could cry, my tears would be flowing as his words of anger tore into me, leaving an indelible mark in their wake.

"_He's too old for you!" _he raged, his anger now unhindered. I raised my head in an instant, confused by his response. How much did he know? Outward appearances put me at the same age as Bella - I was forever seventeen to those who remained oblivious to the truth. Perhaps there was more to this, I mused. And then, it hit me. Surely Billy didn't tell him.......

"_We're both juniors," _Bella corrected.

"_Wait," _Charlie said, pausing, to my relief.

And just like that, the anger within Charlie seemed to abate, to trickle away ever so slightly. There was a long pause before he spoke further, his muted thoughts changing to confusion as he no doubt tried to grasp what Bella has just told him. Now the tenor of his thoughts returned to the familiar, to the comforting even. Thoughts of a protective father trying to keep his daughter away from a hormonal teenage boy. This brought me some sense of relief, for even if Mike Newton were to come calling on this very day, I had no doubt in my mind that Charlie would react in the exact same manner.

"_Which one is Edwin?" _he asked finally. I chuckled at his response. That was a normal, fatherly reply if ever I heard one.

"_EDWARD is the youngest, the one with the reddish brown hair," _she clarified, correcting her father's apparent mistake. My chuckle petered out with each word she spoke, and awe welled within me in its place at the very thought of Bella forever defending my honour. God I loved this woman!

"_Oh, well, that's.....better, I guess. I don't like the look of that big one. I'm sure he's a nice boy and all, but he looks too....mature for you. Is this Edwin your boyfriend?" _Charlie asked, the anxiety level in his thoughts elevated but normal, under the circumstances. My laughter ramped up in response to his error in saying my name incorrectly yet again, and I became hysterical at the very notion of Bella dating the hulking Emmett as I pictured Rosalie's reaction to THAT very frightening scenario. Yet again, she corrected him.

"_It's Edward, Dad."_

"_Is he?" _he asked, completely ignoring Bella's correction again.

"_Sort of, I guess," _she answered casually, instantaneously stopping my laughter. Sort of indeed. Of course, we had to take things slowly with Charlie, and though I knew what she was trying to do, it still irked me to think that Bella would ever speak of our love so offhandedly. I hoped that this would be a once only statement and as I pondered, her elevated heart rate revealed her true feelings. Her reaction to her embellishment could not be hidden from me, and I sighed, revelling in the truth that her heart spoke in defiance of her words. Of course she cared deeply for me, and did not like lying about this any more than I liked hearing it. I could not believe how much my long forgotten human emotions ruled my every thought.

"_You said last night that you weren't interested in any of the boys in town," _he argued childishly, his tone much less threatening as his arguments began to sink to a refutable level. To my relief, Charlie's anxiety was also dissipating and his thoughts appeared to be on a more even keel. I exhaled deeply, knowing that the worst was over, and stared out of the window skywards, thanking the rain filled heavens that Bella had gotten through this relatively unscathed.

"_Well Edward doesn't live in town, Dad," _she replied truthfully on a technicality.

Then I heard the dropped fork scrape against the dinner plate as Charlie relaxed enough to continue eating his meal. That was a good sign.

"_And anyways, it's kind of at an early stage you know. Don't embarrass me with all the boyfriend talk, okay?"_ I could just picture Bella blushing at this very moment, and I growled in response to my wayward thoughts and desires.

"_When is he coming over?" _Charlie asked, appearing to concede to the inevitable as I returned to focus on what I needed to do next.

"_He'll be here in a few moments," _Bella replied, relief in her tone.

I was relieved as well. Not only relieved that this conversation had turned from angered to civil, but also relieved that I would be in Bella Swan's company within a matter of moments. I inhaled deeply, steeling myself for what was to come as I pulled out from the curb and drove slowly to my destination, still listening in on their conversation as I drove.

"_Where is he taking you?"_

Bella groaned loudly, her obvious reluctance to answer apparent. I smiled. She knew how her father would react. So did I. "_I hope you're getting the Spanish Inquisition out of your system now. We're going to play baseball with his family." _

As expected, Charlie chuckled, causing me to mirror his response. He knew of Bella's dubious sense of balance, resulting in her reluctance to participate in sports of any kind, just as I did.

"_Well, I'll probably watch most of the time," _she clarified. I laughed loudly once again, remembering that I had suggested she watch ALL of the time. For her own safety, of course.

"_You must really like this guy," _Charlie said, suspicion and a little annoyance once again prevalent in his thoughts.

Bella sighed loudly in response, Charlie's inquisitive behaviour seemingly irritating her.

I pulled into the driveway and parked behind Bella's truck as I heard her place the dishes in the sink, and a strange sensation suddenly overwhelmed me. I felt as if I was going on a job interview and if my palms could possibly sweat, they would be soaked at this very moment. I checked the rear view mirror briefly and stared at my now strained expression, took a few deep breaths to calm myself and opened the door, stepping with trepidation into the unknown. Right on cue, the rain poured down, soaking my hair and somehow giving me the courage to proceed. The rain and sunless sky always comforted me, and once again it had served its purpose. I was nonetheless pleased that I also brought a jacket and was still going to be relatively presentable for this most important occasion. I was desperate to make a good impression, whatever it took.

"_Leave the dishes, I can do them tonight. You baby me too much," _Charlie offered as I stepped onto the porch and rang the doorbell, trying to fidget and seem human. I did not think that Charlie would respond well to a statue standing on his porch.

Once again I took a few deep breaths as I heard two sets of footsteps approach the door, the closest being of the heaviest and slowest gait. The porch light came on at the same time that Charlie opened the door, and he stared at me challengingly before he said, "Come on in, Edward." Bella sighed as I gasped in surprise at his use of my correct name, while both of their scents overwhelmed me for a brief moment. Of course, Bella's scent overpowered everything else, and was the one that drew me in, as always. Being apart from her for even a few hours seemed to set me back ever so slightly, though on this occasion, the man standing in front of me distracted me so much that it was easily dealt with. For that small mercy, I was strangely grateful.

Charlie's outward appearance was serene, no doubt due to his years of experience as a police officer, but just beneath the surface, his thoughts revealed his protective nature which was on the verge of possessive. I wondered where he kept his gun....

"Thanks, Chief Swan," I said respectfully, masking my overwhelming feelings well, using all of my energies to project my human facade, and to convince Charlie that I was a regular seventeen year old boy here to meet the father of his girlfriend. Just like any other human. I swallowed thickly, knowing that everything I was trying to project was farcical.

"Go ahead and call me Charlie," he replied in a friendly voice, somewhat surprising me. "Here, I'll take your jacket," he offered further. Well, this man WAS good. I had now discovered where Bella got her acting skills from.

"Thanks, sir," I replied, still not comfortable with calling him Charlie, knowing his true feelings, but nonetheless removing my rain soaked jacket for him to hang on the hook in the hallway.

"Have a seat there Edward," he continued, glancing at the single chair in the living room. I did not dare take the couch, as I was more than aware of Charlie's mood and suspected that he wanted me to be as far away from his daughter as was humanly possible. I walked slowly to the chair and sat, and Bella followed closely behind me, taking her seat on the sofa and shooting me a look of annoyance. As Charlie walked past and headed to the couch, I winked at her behind his back as I tried to convey my assurance to her, however I was unable to change the situation I now found myself in.

After taking his seat, he leant forward, his body language and thoughts once again of a protective nature, and I prepared myself for the Spanish Inquisition, as Bella so aptly put it. Bella grimaced, apparently preparing herself for the onslaught as well.

"So, I hear you're getting my girl to watch baseball," he stated.

"Yes, sir, that's the plan," I answered immediately, my casual response causing Bella to glance at me quizzically. She knew I'd been listening. She didn't miss a thing.

"Well, more power to you," Charlie replied sarcastically, his thoughts finally beginning to relax to a more humoured tenor. And then, he laughed, causing me to laugh reflexively in response, Bella's endearing clumsiness uniting us for a brief moment. This was the moment I had craved. All of a sudden, Charlie seemed to be accepting of me, and I could not hide my joy.

"Okay," Bella said, annoyed, "Enough humour at my expense. Let's go," she huffed as she walked to the hall and retrieved her jacket. Our laughter had abated, but I still exuded joy, my smile unable to be curbed in light of Charlie's acceptance.

Charlie and I followed closely behind and as I grabbed my jacket and put it on, he said, "Not too late, Bell."

"Don't worry, Charlie," I assured him, smiling wider at the realisation that I had finally called him by his first name. "I'll have her home early," I promised.

He leant towards me and said, "You take care of my girl, all right?" Though Bella was unlike Charlie in so many ways, they certainly had their similarities. I was surprised that Charlie was not one bit repelled by me, and had only reacted in a way that any human father would when his daughter brought a boy home for the first time. From the day we met, Bella had never been repelled by me, and in hindsight I should not have been surprised by Charlie's response. I only hoped that Charlie was not as perceptive as Bella in detecting a vampire....

Bella groaned in protest at her father's archaic comment, but I acquiesced with Charlie. I wanted to take care of Bella. NEEDED to, in point of fact.

"She'll be safe with me, I promise, sir," I said sincerely, formally, to accentuate my point.

Bella stalked out, her walk that of a spoiled child that had not gotten her way. Both Charlie and I laughed in unison, united once again by Bella's antics, as I followed her outside. Bella paused on the porch as she took in the sight of the large red Jeep parked in the driveway, and I sensed that she felt overwhelmed by its size, and was probably wondering why I was using it instead of the Volvo.

Charlie let out a low whistle, and choked out, "Wear your seat belts." His concern for his daughter immediately forced me to act to assist her, as the rain beat down heavily upon us.

I immediately followed Bella around to her side of the Jeep and opened the door, trying to keep Bella as dry as possible. She hesitated, her eyes darting between the door and the seat, seemingly preparing herself to jump for it. As the rain continued to soak her beautiful tresses, which were drawn back into a ponytail, I decided to intervene. Not wanting to risk her slipping on the wet ground and injuring herself, and fearing that her sense of balance would fail her yet again, I sighed knowingly and effortlessly lifted Bella into the car. Her eyes darted toward Charlie in alarm, my movements probably bordering on non-human, but I didn't care. I needed to ensure that she was safely in the car.

As I walked around the front of the Jeep, I glanced through the windshield and noticed that Bella was struggling to comply with her father's request.

"What's all this?" she asked as I opened the door and got in.

"It's an off-road harness," I replied, smiling inwardly as I watched her try to figure out which buckle went where.

"Uh-oh," she said, her fruitless efforts to put on the harness unsuccessful as I closed the door. She was so delightful!

Suddenly, the scent of her, mixed in with the rain, bombarded my senses as if I had been run over by a stampeding herd of wild buffalo. I needed her so much, my every desire filled to the brim as my eyes closed for a moment. Trying to regain my self-control, I sighed in frustration and tried with every ounce of strength to assist Bella in putting the harness on without attacking her, but it was just too tempting to hold back completely. After I buckled her in, and without being able to control myself, my hands lingered at Bella's neck and brushed along her collarbone, her scent everywhere all at once! In response, her heart began to race, only increasing my need further. I was pleased that we were under the camouflage of the heavy rain, my actions out of Charlie's view, the rain once again rescuing me but at the same time accentuating my need. My frightening, confounding, frustrating, exciting need. I gulped, every muscle in my body aching for her.

Knowing I could not very well leave Bella sitting in the car, I managed to compose myself enough to start the Jeep, backing out of the driveway and pulling away from the house. We left Charlie standing on the porch alone, his thoughts of loss crossing my mind as we drove to the end of the street. Poor Charlie.

"This is a....um....BIG Jeep you have," Bella said, thankfully speaking about something that would serve to distract me from my lustful thoughts.

"It's Emmett's. I didn't think you'd want to run the whole way," I said, waiting for her response.

"Where do you keep this thing?" she asked.

"We remodelled one of the outbuildings into a garage," I responded, wondering why Bella had not responded at all to my statement regarding running. How odd.

Then, I felt her eyes stare at me up and down as she said, "Aren't you going to put your seatbelt on?"

I stared at her disbelievingly, wondering if she had forgotten that I was in fact immortal. Then, something in her eyes made her come to a realisation.

"Run the WHOLE way?" she asked finally. Ah, there was the reaction I was expecting.

I grinned and said truthfully, "You're not going to run."

"I'M going to be sick," she stated.

"Keep your eyes closed, you'll be fine," I answered, once again relieved by this distracting conversation as her scent continued to invade me. I knew how much I loved Bella's scent. I also knew how much I enjoyed the rain. These two forces in combination were incredibly irresistible!

Bella bit her lip enticingly, though I sensed panic just beneath the surface. I leaned over to her and kissed the top of her head, my thoughts and feelings let loose as I groaned, though I was proud of my restraint, all things considered.

Bella looked at me, seemingly puzzled by my reaction.

"You smell so good in the rain," I explained, letting Bella know my feelings and hopeful that telling her would somehow improve my ability to control them.

"In a good way, or in a bad way?" she asked cautiously.

I sighed heavily and continued to be open with my feelings and confessed, "Both, always both." I knew in my heart which emotions were stronger, however, the tug-of-war still raged within.

The road ended and we were finally at the path that led to our destination; the reason why I had Bella wear the harness in the first place. I drove over the uneven path in silence, knowing that conversation would be more difficult as I watched Bella bounce up and down on the seat and hang on for dear life. This only served to send her scent throughout the confines of the enclosed space yet again, but she amused me so much, that all I could do was smile broadly and continue to fight my constant battle in silence. As Alice had predicted, the rain began to slow to a drizzle as we approached the end of the undulating path, the surrounding trees stopping us from progressing further in the Jeep.

"Sorry Bella, we have to go on foot from here," I said apologetically.

"You know what? I'll just wait here," she replied stubbornly.

"What happened to all your courage? You were extraordinary this morning," I reminded her, proud of Bella's performance under duress. She had certainly had, I realised, a day filled with firsts. A day that was still far from over. I day that I could only envisage getting better.

I opened the door and blurred to her side of the car in an instant, and before she could argue, I had the door open and was unbuckling the harness that had kept her safe. "I'll get those. You go on ahead," she said in protest, trying to brush my hands away.

It appeared that I was going to have to call her bluff to get her to alight from the car. "Hmmm..." I said thoughtfully. "It seems I'm going to have to tamper with your memory," I finished quickly. Before she could react to my theatrics, I had pulled Bella from the Jeep and set her on her feet.

"Tamper with my memory?" she asked nervously. Surely she could not think I had that ability? Then again....

"Something like that," I replied as I stared at Bella intently, faintly amused by her response, but at the same time in such close proximity to her that my desires began to well within me once again. Without a thought, I placed my hands against the Jeep on either side of her beautiful face and leaned in further, her body pressed against the door of the Jeep as my body encircled her, trapped her. Unable to resist, I leaned in closer, the burning within me starting to take control of my heightened senses, and oh how I loved it! "Now," I breathed, "what exactly are you worrying about?" Perhaps she was worried about an out of control vampire ravaging her. One could only hope!

"Well, um, hitting a tree," she said distractedly, seemingly just as affected by our close proximity as I. "And dying. And then getting sick," she breathed, her heart fluttering with every word she spoke.

Yet again, two sides of me warred within. What I truly wanted, needed, ached for in that moment was to have my skin on hers, in any way I possibly could. That desire overshadowed the deeply buried monster, and though I knew I had control of that side of me, I still needed to be wary of its existence. On the other hand, I also needed her to agree to accompany me to the clearing. I wondered that if I distracted her enough, enticed her enough, she would agree to come. And, then, an idea struck. I could kill two birds with one stone, as it were. I fought back a sly smile about my rather manipulative idea, my selfish desires fighting with guilt, and my need for her to be with me overruling all others. I conceded to the need, and bent my head down and touched my lips to the hollow at the base of her throat, her soft skin tempting me like no other, the burning down my throat ever-present as I inhaled her, welcoming the pain with open arms.

"Are you still worried now?" I murmured against her skin.

"Yes," she replied, struggling to speak. "About hitting trees and getting sick."

My nose skimmed up her throat and as I reached the point of her chin I exhaled, washing her with my breath.

"And now?" I whispered against her jaw.

"Trees," she gasped incoherently. "Motion sickness," she added. I sensed that victory was within my sights and pressed on relentlessly.

I lifted my face to kiss Bella's eyelids and purred seductively, "Bella, you don't really think I would hit a tree, do you?"

Her voice lacked conviction as she replied, "No, but I might."

Now that I had what I wanted, I wanted to get what I needed. What I most craved. I kissed her slowly down her cheek, stopping at the corner of her beautiful mouth. "Would I let a tree hurt you?" I said softly as my lips brushed against her trembling lower lip. I loved that I could elicit that response from her. Loved it.

"No," she breathed, her sweet breath gushing forth and enveloping me, enhancing the burn to fever pitch.

"You see," I said, my lips moving against the softness of hers. "There's nothing to be afraid of, is there?"

"No," she sighed, bringing me undone with her breath and scent completely surrounding me, tempting me to kiss her with feeling, with force. I took her glorious face in my hands, a little less carefully than I had before, and kissed Bella, her wet, soft velveteen lips covering mine, and once again, I was swept away. I was lost in her sweetness, her scent, everything about her, and the burning that spread from my stomach all the way out to each limb told me this in no uncertain terms. I was already on the edge of completely losing control, when Bella pushed things beyond my limitations. Suddenly, her arms were wrapped around my neck and her body was pressed against mine. As if the bittersweet burn was not torture enough, she sighed heavily into my mouth, the burning increasing a hundred fold and tempting this vampire beyond rational thought! As much as I wanted to go with the moment more than anything, I could not, would not, risk her very life. I somehow found the fortitude to break free of Bella, staggering back as I tried to regain some semblance of self-control, before I did something I would regret forever.

"Damn it, Bella!" I cursed, gasping. "You'll be the death of me, I swear you will!" Of course, I had it all wrong. I would always be the death of her. Always. Then again, because of that, I realised that she would be the death of me, as I would of course follow closely behind her, my argument with myself coming full circle.

Bella leaned over, bracing her hands against her knees. "You're indestructible," she mumbled, agreeing with my thoughts, trying to catch her breath.

"I might have believed that before I met YOU!" I said irrationally. "Now let's get out of here before I do something really stupid," I growled. I was so angry with myself for allowing this to happen that it took all of my self control to gently lift Bella onto my back. She silently locked her legs around my waist and put her arms around my neck. Once again, I struggled to focus as the warmth of her penetrated me.

"Don't forget to close your eyes," I warned severely, still overwrought with emotion.

Unable to speak, Bella complied and tucked her head beneath my shoulder blade. Then, I felt her thudding heart surround me yet again, and the anger began to ebb away as quickly as it had arrived. Instinctually, I took off and ran. Running always gave me a sense of release, and boy did I need release at this very moment! Every emotion was running amuck within me and I needed to exorcise them. As I flew, I began to feel lighter and more in control with every single stride I took. Finally, we had arrived near the clearing. "It's over Bella," I said as I reached back and touched her damp, sweet smelling hair.

I felt her face move from my shoulder, and her body relax as she disentangled herself from me. Then, she did something that made the pendulum swing yet again on my emotions. She slid to the ground, landing on her glorious backside as she tried to remove herself from her grip on me.

"Oh!" she gasped as she hit the wet ground, her face bewildered as she stared up at me.

That did it. I burst into a roar of laughter, any remaining anger within me disappearing in an instant.

Too busy laughing to offer Bella my hand, she picked herself up and brushed the mud and bracken off her jacket and her jeans. Unable to control myself, that then sent me into hysterics, my booming laughter penetrating the surrounding trees and echoing through the forest.

No doubt annoyed with my laughing at her expense once again, she stomped away from me towards the forest, though in the wrong direction. In reaction, I grabbed her hastily and placed my arm around her waist. "Where are you going?" I asked, trying with all my strength to stop from laughing again.

"To watch a baseball game. You don't seem to be interested in playing anymore, but I'm sure the others will have fun without you," she replied with venom in her voice. Averting her eyes, she turned away from me and tried to go in the wrong direction again. I could envision Bella becoming lost in the woods very easily. I caught her in my arms again, her warm body blazing against my skin this time, her temperature seemingly rising in line with her indignation.

"Don't be mad, I couldn't help myself. You should have seen your face," I said, chuckling uncontrollably.

"Oh, you're the only one who's allowed to get mad?" she challenged, raising her eyebrows.

Silly Bella. "I wasn't mad at you," I explained.

"Bella, you'll be the death of me?" she quoted, her face hard.

"THAT was simply a statement of fact," I assured as I held Bella in my grasp before she could escape.

"You were mad," she insisted.

"Yes," I agreed.

"But you just said....."

"That I wasn't mad at YOU. Can't you see that, Bella? Don't you understand?" I asked of her, staring at her intensely, trying to convey what I was feeling. What I knew to be the plain, simple truth.

"See what?" she demanded, confusion crossing her beautiful face.

"I'm never angry with you – how could I be? Brave, trusting....warm as you are," I stated honestly.

"Then why?" she whispered, still seemingly unable to understand that NONE of this was her fault.

I would need to make her see that it was me. All me. I placed my hands on her face with care and said gently, "I infuriate myself. The way I can't seem to keep from putting you in danger. My very existence puts you at risk. Sometimes I truly hate myself. I should be stronger, I should be able to...."

Before I could continue with what I was going to say, Bella saw to it that the words 'walk away' never escaped my lips, instead placing her warm hand over my mouth, interrupting my statement. "Don't," she murmured, causing my heart to burst. I loved her so much. I knew how it would break her heart to hear those words, for mine would too. If Bella was trying to say those words, I would do everything I could to stop her uttering them as well. The thought of parting ways was just too painful...too unbearable to ever contemplate. As I pondered, I realised that no matter how accurately Alice could predict the future, I did not know how many tomorrows I would have with Bella Swan. Not really. Though I knew that this was a cross for all humans to bear, Bella's life was constantly hanging in the balance because of me, which begged me to consider things from her perspective. What had I really given up? Nothing. What had she given up? Everything. Who stood to lose from this relationship? Bella. I only stood to gain from us being together. I was selfish. So very selfish.

In that moment, things became crystal clear, and all of my insignificant fears and insecurities fell away, washing through me as if they were never there to begin with. No matter what uncertainties or doubts I had harboured up until now, she needed to know, needed to be told those three words that had not yet escaped my lips in her presence before it was too late. Before I lost her. Before the sun had set on yet another day.

I took her hand and moved it from my lips, pressing its warmth to my face, her touch giving me the courage I needed to tell her how I felt. How I always felt. How I would feel forevermore. "I love you," I confessed, gazing into the depths of her beautiful brown eyes as I held her. "It's a poor excuse for what I'm doing, but it's still true." And just like that, I felt lighter than I had ever felt in my entire existence, the unburdening of my feelings giving me the release I had always wanted, but had never experienced until this very moment.

She stared at me silently, her eyes a reflection of my own heart, seemingly taking the time to allow my words of declaration to soak through to her bones. "Now, please try to behave yourself," I said as I bent my face into her and softly brushed my lips against hers, taking in the moment. The moment I had waited for my entire existence. She held still, and then sighed, the burning once again reaching within me, but this time I knew. I knew that even though the battle raged on within me, I was too overjoyed by my declaration to think of anything else in this moment. I was a man in love and Bella finally knew how I felt!

After several moments, Bella broke the spell that surrounded us, and finally said, "You promised Chief Swan that you would have me home early, remember? We'd better get going."

"Yes, ma'am," I agreed, smiling wistfully as I pulled her hand from my face and led her through the ferns and around the familiar hemlock tree, toward the clearing and yet another chapter in our relationship. We had finally reached our desired destination, in more ways than one, made all the sweeter by our most recent conversation. As my heart sang truly for the first time in my hundred years, my smile would not, could not, be wiped from my face as we walked forth....

**A/N: Just got it in under the wire. The hubby is starting to glare at me to leave off with the writing (plus I've GOT to add to Within These Walls), so I have to leave this chapter here and do the next exciting instalment in another chappie. Sorry folks but the baseball game will have to wait!**

**PS Totteacher and I are writing the 7****th**** chapter and I've got to tell you....it's brilliant! So do yourselves a favour and give it a looksee. PLEASE?**

**REVIEW FOLKS AND I'LL LOVE YOU 4EVER!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thank you so much for giving my story a read and for continuing to review! Just remember....I will keep writing if you keep reviewing. Or I will run away faster than a vampire going for home plate...it's up to you lol! I am packing madly but going mad packing, so am writing this chappie to give myself some respite.....moving this weekend! AARGH! Plus I have to wait over a week from 22 March before I'm back online!! DOUBLE AARGH!!!! My novel is called Heart of Darkness. I wonder if it will ever see the light of day? Oh, I hope so!**

**To Totteacher: Thanks for all your support! It's been so wonderful writing with you! I just wish we could write a novel together!!**

**STORY ALERT: We have posted chapter 6 and will be posting chapter 7 of Within These Walls soon! There are not enough reviews.....I know you guys can do better! Please review!!! OUR STORY IS WELL WORTH A READ!**

**Disclaimer: As per usual, I don't claim to own Twilight or any said characters. Not even the action figures! (I would much rather the real thing anyway!)**

EPOV

We walked into the clearing and my mind was immediately filled with the thoughts of everyone there. Everything from disgust on the part of Rosalie, which I had more than expected, to the absolute thrilled excitement from Alice flooded my mind, causing me to flinch as I walked hand in hand with the love of my life.

There was no doubt that I loved my family, but had found it draining to face this bombardment each and every time I found myself in their company lately, their thoughts invading me, their curiosity about Bella on the verge of becoming obsessive. I, however, exceeded them all in that department. I smiled wickedly, my thoughts turning to the woman whose warm touch covered my hand, wanting nothing more than to be with her every moment of every day. I was beyond obsessed. Beyond help. And I loved every moment of it. Loved that my feelings so raw and fresh seemed to not only invade my every nerve, every cell, but that it somehow had a flow-on effect on those around me. Loving Bella Swan had become as natural as breathing.

Esme, Emmett and Rosalie sat on the rocky outcrop, a mere hundred yards away, while Jasper and Alice were in the outfield, throwing the ball to each other, their impatience revealed in their thoughts. Carlisle was counting out the distance between bases as he meticulously measured out our custom sized field, one that was many times the size of a standard baseball diamond, his thoughts focused on pacing out each base with extreme accuracy, making the field so huge that a human would struggle to hear the calls or see the signals.

_About time, Edward. What on EARTH is she wearing? What's with the hair? Oh well, I guess it IS a ball game and not a fashion show, _Alice thought without missing a beat as she threw the ball to Jasper, whose thoughts followed closely behind.

_Hey Edward, I hope you two can stay calm today. I'm not in the mood for keeping watch on your emotions. I wanna play ball, and now! _

I chose to ignore their incessant mental chatter and instead focused on one vampire who showed some semblance of grace and normalcy. I smiled as Esme stood slowly and immediately headed towards us, her thoughts filled with nothing but love and acceptance. _Oh Edward, I'm so glad you brought her. Just a warning though, Rosalie's still not being very.....understanding.....so just give her a little space, dear._

And as I heard Esme's thoughts, Rosalie's came through loud and clear over the top of them. _Ugh! You just HAD to bring her didn't you Edward? Isn't it enough that you can't be away from her for more than five minutes that you have to force her on all of us? I will tell you something now Edward Cullen. I'm NOT staying away from the house when you decide she is to visit. She will just have to put up with me! _Considering Rosalie's demeanour prior to this, her reaction today was a marginal improvement. At least she accepted that Bella would be coming to the house, and no longer felt compelled to make herself scarce every time Bella visited. Perhaps her determination to despise Bella was beginning to waver. One could only hope.

In a way, I felt sympathy for Rosalie. For all that venom and immature behaviour that she unleashed upon the world, mainly directed towards me, I knew that somewhere deep within her lay the heart of an honest, brave and fiercely loyal woman. A heart that was still fragile, still mourning the loss of its own demise. Rosalie stood and walked out to the field without a backward glance, causing Bella's heart to stutter momentarily. Bella need not be a mind reader to know Rosalie's true feelings, and that made my heart yearn more than anything. I yearned for EVERY member of my family to accept Bella. Charlie was so accepting of me, considering what he had to contend with, even when he didn't know the reality of what he was actually accepting. He just did it on blind faith, at least until I was to prove him otherwise. Until I was to show myself to be unworthy of his daughter's love. I hoped with all my heart that THAT would never eventuate, though I felt unworthy of her love each and every day just the same.

Emmett was momentarily torn. He watched as Rosalie walked away from him but instead chose to follow Esme, his curiosity about Bella taking front seat to Rosalie's obvious aggravation. _Sheesh Edward. If looks could kill! Sorry bro....hey Bella's scent sure smells strong! Must be all that rain._

"Was that you we heard, Edward?" Esme queried innocently as though she had regular, human hearing. I was so relieved by her conventional conversation. It made it easier to ignore Emmett's thoughts.

"It sounded like a bear choking," Emmett joked as I rolled my eyes. _And not one that I'd like to hunt! Hahah!_

Bella smiled hesitantly at Esme and said, "That was him." She seemed rather tense, no doubt Rosalie giving her the silent treatment being the primary cause of her worry.

"Bella was being unintentionally funny," I explained, using our amusing moment to help put Bella at ease.

Just as I spoke, a vision flickered through my mind of Alice's prediction. Though it was hazy, it indicated that it was time to get the game going. Alice ran towards us, dancing poetically between her strides, her thoughts joyful. _I'm so happy that you brought my best friend Edward. This is going to be fun!_

"It's time," Alice announced, just as the crashing thunder confirmed her statement, causing Bella to flinch in response. Ah, that Alice was good!

"Eerie isn't it?"Emmett commented, mirroring my thoughts. Emmett winked at Bella assuredly, trying with all his might to make Bella feel as comfortable as possible. Emmett had an innocent charm about him, and his exuberant nature always seemed to rub off on those around him. I was pleased that he had the same effect on Bella, and his thoughts were of nothing but genuine affection for her, one of a protective older brother. I was pleased that Emmett formed part of the majority of my family who had welcomed Bella's presence with open arms.

Alice was at times uncanny, but at other times found it difficult to predict exactly when things would occur. This concerned me when it came to our visitors, and had become more frequent since Bella had walked into the picture, her visions somewhat muffled and lacking clarity of late. Alice had always insisted that her visions were clearer regarding vampires, especially those of us who were closest to her. I just hoped that she was correct about our visitors. The longer they took to show themselves, the more anxious I knew I would become.

Rosalie's thoughts poured like acid through my mind. _Is Emmett TRYING to end up in the doghouse tonight? _Poor Emmett. Rosalie brought me back to the reality of why we were here and my heartfelt sympathy went out to her lovable beau. Emmett took Alice's hand and they ran towards the field. I hoped that Rosalie's stubborn behaviour would not cause Emmett to avoid speaking with Bella. I knew that he was loyal to Rosalie above all others. They had a connection that ran deeper than many would realise, but Emmett's sunny disposition and enthusiasm about Bella's presence was irritating her somewhat. I felt sorry for Emmett. All he wanted was a harmonious family life, whilst still wanting more than anything to foster the bond that he had with his Rose.

"Are you ready for some ball?" I asked Bella eagerly, unable to curb my enthusiasm. She just always seemed to bring out the best in me. The human side. The side that I wished were a true reflection of who I was, instead of a poor imitation.

"Go team!" Bella replied, her enthusiasm a reflection of mine, her chocolate eyes bright as they gazed at me.

I reluctantly released my hold on the one lifeline that I had in my existence and snickered, mussing Bella's damp hair affectionately as I turned and ran out towards the outfield, her glorious scent trying to drag me back in. I pressed on, my speed enabling me to pass Alice and Emmett easily, and though I knew I was showing off, I just could not help myself. I could feel Bella's eyes on me, and wanted to show myself to her in full flight. Yet again, I was displaying my very flawed human side, and I loved it. I had never felt more alive, more vital.

I stopped and waited for the others to join me. "Alright, I'll bat first," Emmett said. "I'll show Bella how a real man hits a ball!" he boasted, staring at me with a wide grin. I returned his smile, knowing what Carlisle had in mind.

"Okay, then Edward you'd better take left field first, and you pitch Alice," Carlisle said. Emmett grunted in complaint, annoyed by the fact that the fastest vampire was to be fielding exactly where he liked to hit the ball most. "And I'll cover the bases," he added, winking at Emmett.

_Aww, that's not fair! _I laughed at Emmett's thoughts.

"Well, Miss Alice, may I be so honoured as to catch for you darlin'?" Jasper gushed in his southern drawl.

"Of course you may!" she replied, batting her eyes at him.

"Mind on the game you two. You can bat next Jasper, then Rosalie," I instructed as we separated and prepared to take our positions. I chuckled at their thoughts, which had digressed to wanton desire. I was pleased that Rosalie found our banter faintly amusing. It was distracting me from Jasper's inappropriate mindset. Of course, sometimes when I thought of Bella I felt like an animal, but would never have the freedom to act on my desires. For that reason, I would always envy those in my family who had partners who were more, shall we say, durable.

_Let's get this over with, _Rosalie thought as she gave me a slight smile.

Out of the corner of my eye I watched as Bella walked slowly with Esme towards the field, Esme inviting Bella to come watch. I knew that it was probably inappropriate, but I could not help but listen in on their distant conversation. Of course it was unavoidable that everyone would hear what they had to say, but my ears pricked with every word spoken, unlike the others who were trying but failing to give Bella some sort of privacy.

"_You don't play with them?" _Bella asked Esme.

"_No. I prefer to referee – I like keeping them honest," _Esme replied. _Edward, make sure you keep an eye on them for a moment. I'm talking to Bella._

I smiled. I knew how many arguments we got into over who was right and wrong when playing our favourite of all games. Funnily enough, I always knew who was being honest and who was embellishing, and their unwavering determination to win bordered on comical in their transparency. Alice's predictions and my mind reading ability made it impossible for anyone to get away with lying, though it did not stop any of them from doing it just the same.

"_Do they like to cheat then?"_

"_Oh yes – you should hear the arguments they get into!" _Esme exclaimed and added, _"Actually I hope you don't, you would think they were raised by a pack of wolves."_

"_You sound like my mom," _Bella said, laughing in surprise, causing me to smirk in response.

_Oh, I remind her of her mother! _

"_Well, I do think of them as my children," _Esme said, laughing, belying her internal monologue. That's when Esme poured her heart out, turning my expression serious. _"I never could get over my mothering instincts – did Edward tell you I had lost a child?" _she asked, Bella seemingly taken aback as she spoke, as I would have expected.

"_No,"_ she murmured, stunned by Esme's confession.

I knew that if Esme were able to shed a tear she would be crying a torrent at the moment. Though my vague recollections of my parents whispered through my memory, I could not imagine the pain that one would be forced to endure after having lost a child. And, I never would. A tinge of sadness crossed my face. A sadness that I felt for Esme, and for the life I could not offer Bella.

"_Yes, my first and only baby. He died just a few days after he was born, the poor tiny thing," _Esme sighed. _"It broke my heart – that's why I jumped off the cliff, you know." _My heart broke for Esme. She was so matter-of-fact about the whole thing, yet I knew that if she were still human, her demeanour would be something yet entirely.

_Oh dear, perhaps I should not have been so blunt with poor Bella. _

"_Edward just said you f-fell," _Bella stammered, causing me to cringe, my concern for both of these women immediate. _I have upset the poor girl, I must reassure her. And Edward, you are so very kind. You are such a gentleman._

"_Always the gentleman," _Esme repeated out loud, a smile in her voice. _"Edward was the first of my new sons. I've always thought of him that way, even though he's older than I, in one way at least. That's why I'm so happy that he's found you, dear. He's been the odd man out for far too long; it's hurt me to see him alone," _she gushed with endearment, making me even happier if that were even possible. I knew how lucky I was. As a rule, vampires did not have bonds as close as our family did, our selfish, nomadic natures getting in the way of forming any long lasting relationships. On top of us all being close, I had a mother figure that cared deeply for me. As deeply as any human mother who gave birth to their very own child. I will never forget the look of love on Esme's face after Carlisle had changed her and brought her home. It was something that would always remain with me, that kind face of hers somehow lessening my grief for my own mother, even as a newborn. I knew why Carlisle had brought her home. It was just as much for me as it was for him, his selflessness once again causing him to do things that other vampires would never consider contemplating.

"_You don't mind then?" _Bella asked her hesitantly. "_That I'm....all wrong for him?" _When would Bella realise that she was RIGHT for me? It was ME that was wrong for HER! Of course, my selfish vampiric nature did not allow me to do the right thing, and I knew that it never would.

_Oh my, of course I don't mind. I just wonder, with all that you have to contend with, if things will work out for the both of you._

"_No. You're what he wants. It will work out somehow," _she replied, her thoughts not as confident as her words, the thunder bringing an abrupt halt to their conversation. They had finally reached their destination at the edge of the field and Bella's eyes scanned the perimeter of the clearing, taking note of where each of us stood, her widened eyes lingering on me. A jolt pierced through me, my thoughts of her once again distracting me as I wondered if she realised I'd been listening. At the same time I also wondered what I would do right now if I were alone with her, and what I had ever done to deserve her. It was amazing how much Bella's presence scrambled my emotions, making me feel all things painful and pleasurable in the same instance.

Emmett stood at home plate waiting for Esme's call, swinging the bat in mock practice. _Hey Edward. Watch me hit this one out of the park!_

"All right," Esme called, signalling that the game was about to commence. "Batter up." I rolled my eyes and spread my stance in a half crouch, readying myself for anything that Emmett wished to throw at me.

Jasper signalled to Alice to pitch the first ball as a curve ball, which deviated perfectly and caused Emmett to miss it completely, the bat hardly moving as it flew into Jasper's hand. Alice knew that her curve ball would surprise Emmett. He preferred to use the speed of her fast ball to gain the most distance. _Hmmm....I see! Bring it pixie!_

"Was that a strike?" Bella whispered, trying to be kind to Emmett no doubt.

"If they don't hit it, it's a strike," Esme answered, explaining our modified rules.

_Well that was the last free ride you'll get from me! _Emmett narrowed his eyes in concentration and glared at me. _Beat this Edward!_

Alice pitched the second ball and Emmett took a huge swing, the ball making contact with the bat with a loud crack, its sound echoing circularly around the field and permeating through the surrounding forest. As Emmett took off to run to first base, I immediately saw the ball sail past me and took off like the wind in pursuit, Emmett's challenge making me more determined than ever to catch the ball as I raced through the forest. I judged its velocity perfectly, dodging and weaving through trees and brush, my concentration unwavering, my legs flying and arms pumping as I watched the ball fly through the canopy above.

"_Home run,"_ I heard Bella murmur as I pursued the ball with determination.

"_Wait," _Esme cautioned Bella at the very same time I dove and caught the ball mere feet from the ground as it flew between two trees, the ball smacking loudly into my palm. _"Out!"_ she confirmed as I ran back to the edge of the field wearing a huge grin on my face.

"Emmett hits the hardest, while Edward runs the fastest," Esme explained as Emmett lurched back to take his place in the field and gave me a mocking glare. I winked at him in return. _Next time bro! Just you wait!_

The inning continued before Bella's incredulous eyes as she watched everything in amazement, as if she'd never seen me run before, her eyes darting all over the place as she tried to keep up with the frantic pace of the game. I realised that it was probably overwhelming for her to see all of us in full flight. Bella had yet to witness any vampire-like behaviour from anyone in my family except myself, and seeing all of us at the same time had to be confusing to her human eyes. The thing that surprised her more than anything was when Jasper hit a ground ball that came up short and Carlisle and I raced to track the ball, our unforgiving bodies colliding and cracking louder than the thunder. Bella jumped, her face filled with concern as Jasper headed for first base.

"Safe," Esme confirmed, Emmett's team up by one as Rosalie managed to flit around the bases after tagging up one of Emmett's long flies, to which he roared with satisfaction, until I caught the third out. I immediately raced to Bella's side, brimming with excitement.

"What do you think?" I asked, my eyes wide.

"One thing's for sure. I'll never be able to sit through dull old Major League Baseball again," Bella replied sarcastically.

I laughed at her humorous response, knowing that Bella had very little interest in anything sports, and said, "And it sounds like you did so much of that before."

"I am a little disappointed," she teased.

"Why?" I asked, puzzled.

"Well, it would be nice if I could find just one thing you didn't do better than everyone else on the planet," she observed. Oh, how I loved her! She saw nothing but the best in me, even though I was in many ways, the worst possible version of myself. She made me believe that I could become a better person than I had ever envisioned, and I loved her so much for that. Bella just kept giving me gifts that surprised me, and was undeserving of, her generosity of spirit unwavering.

I smiled at my Bella, causing her breathing to become laboured. I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and crush her lips to mine, but that would have to wait. I hoped, though, that I would not have to wait too long for that eventuality.

"I'm up," I said, trying my best to focus on the fact that there were six sets of eyes and ears hanging on every word spoken between Bella and I.

Jasper pitched a slider and I bunted the ball out of the reach of Rosalie's hands, and gained two bases before Emmett could get the ball back into play. Carlisle was up next and hit a cracking shot out of the field and beyond anyone's reach for a catch, allowing both of us to make home plate. Alice gave us both high fives, congratulating us on our achievement.

The score constantly changed as the game continued, and we tried to outdo and psych each other out, everyone trying to lie once again and bend the rules to their advantage. Poor Esme had to mediate each argument, and with each one worse than the last, an affable conclusion was becoming a near impossibility.

Carlisle was up to bat, with me catching, when my world was suddenly turned upside down. Just like that, in the blink of an eye, everything I had strived for threatened to disintigrate in a puff of smoke, becoming no more than a distant memory. A vision played through Alice's mind of the visitors that we were expecting, and they were headed this way! As I felt Bella's eyes bore into mine, my head snapped up and I stared at Alice, whose expression was one of horror. _Oh no! Edward I'm so sorry! I didn't know...please you must know....I had no way of knowing....! _In a flash I was at Bella's side, my mind racing, as panic overwhelmed me. The vision was becoming clearer and I recognised the areas of forest that they travelled through as being the ones north of the clearing, behind second base. They were approaching, and approaching fast.

"Alice?" Esme asked, her voice tense as the others joined us.

"I didn't see – I couldn't tell," Alice whispered, her eyes agonised.

"What is it Alice?" Carlisle asked with a calm voice of authority. If he only knew what was to come, he would not be so calm.

"They were travelling much quicker than I thought. I can see I had the perspective wrong before," Alice murmured, her body going into shock, along with mine.

Jasper leaned over Alice protectively and asked, "What changed?"

"They heard us playing, and it changed their path," Alice answered, still mentally apologising to me repeatedly.

We all turned to Bella to ascertain that she was coping, and then averted our gaze towards the perimeter of the clearing.

_Edward, you need to get Bella out of here! It's all my fault and if something happened to my best friend......please Edward! _Alice was panicked, the vision become clearer and stronger with each thought.

"How soon?" Carlisle said as he turned toward me. I focused on their thoughts, though they were still too far out to hear except for a whisper, the gentle breeze bringing hints of their scent along with it like some sort of sick joke. They were close, no more than five minutes' run away. It was too late to run, and it was possible that they had already caught our scents, including that of Bella's.

"Less than five minutes," I conceded, trying to keep an even tone while inside my stomach tightened, a huge knot forming within my gullet. What was to happen now? Alice's vision began to flicker, and depending on what we did now would decide what was to come. We would have to tread warily. Alice had said that they were merely curious. I hoped that she was right and that somehow we could protect Bella from them. "They're running – they want to play," I scowled, their thoughts high on finding those of our kind, and on top of that those of our kind playing baseball. I wanted nothing more than to tear them apart and use home plate as a pyre. I had to keep calm, to focus. Every decision made when they arrived would impact on the future.

"Can you make it?" Carlisle asked with futility, his sympathetic and panicked eyes flicking to Bella momentarily and back toward me.

"No – not carrying," I said, cutting short my sentence, trying to make efforts to get inside their minds. Finally their voices became clearer as they approached with stealth.

_I love baseball! I hope they don't mind us playing. It will be good to talk to someone other than these two, _thought one of them, a male with a slight French accent.

_I need to clean up, _thought the woman, her mental voice smooth and calm.

_That human wasn't enough, no challenge at all. How boring! I need to find a way to have some fun, _thought the other male. His voice somehow worried me, its tone void of feeling. It also concerned me that he may still be thirsty, or at least bored enough to want to feed for something to do. This was not good. These were nomads that appeared to have not had any contact with others of our kind for some time, if they were in need of conversation and a place to clean up. That concerned me in that they were probably closer to feral animals than to civilised beings. One thing that I was relieved of was that they had not caught Bella's scent. Not yet, anyway.

"Besides, the last thing we need is for them to catch the scent and start hunting," I said rather unfeelingly, causing Bella to flinch as she involuntarily leant towards me.

"How many?" Emmett asked Alice.

"Three," Alice answered tersely, her vision still flickering through her mind, the future still to be determined on whatever we decided to do now.

_Bring it on! I'll teach them if they hurt my brother's girl! _"Three!" Emmett scoffed. "Let them come," he challenged as he flexed his muscles.

All eyes were anxiously on Carlisle as he contemplated what to do next, Emmett the only one who was unperturbed by the potential danger. He never was.

_Son I don't think we can get Bella out of here, so I suggest that we try to keep as much distance between them and Bella as we can. Alice said they were curious. Let's satisfy their curiosity as quickly as possible and send them on their way. _I nodded once towards Carlisle in agreement as I formed strategies within my mind, my anger threatening to burst forth as I contemplated.

"Let's just continue the game," Carlisle finally said, his voice cool and level. How could he remain so calm? "Alice said they were simply curious," he added, reinforcing his reasoning to keep Bella here. Bella's expression was unfathomable, her reaction to this terrible situation however understandable, must be curbed. She must remain calm.

_No problem, Edward. I'll use my gift to keep her from losing it. _I was relieved that Jasper had read Bella and had decided to take decisive action.

"Edward, are they thirsty?" Esme asked in a low voice, too quickly and quietly for Bella to hear. I shook my head, causing Esme to sigh in relief. Of course, I had no idea if that would make any difference once they caught Bella's scent. We needed to behave as normally as possible. I hoped that if I called the game and stood near Bella, it would not seem obvious that I was trying to protect her, and hoped that they would field a few balls and become bored, leaving before Bella was revealed to them as a human.

"You catch, Esme. I'll call it now," I said calmly as I stood as closely to Bella without it looking like a protective stance. What my instincts were telling me to do was crouch, and be ready to attack at the slightest movement.

The others returned to the field, each one of us warily sweeping the darkening forest, readying ourselves for what was to come.

"Take your hair down," I said to Bella in an even voice, Jasper's gift rubbing off on me as well. Bella complied, sliding the rubber band out of her hair and shook it around her, her scent briefly overwhelming me. My stomach and throat burned, but I continued to keep a calm facade.

"The others are coming now," Bella stated in a monotone voice.

"Yes, stay very still, keep quiet, and don't move from my side, please," I begged, my voice straining somewhat as I pulled Bella's tresses forward to surround her beautiful face.

"That won't help," Alice said softly, stating the obvious. "I could smell her across the field."

"I know," I replied, a hint of frustration breaking through Jasper's gift.

Carlisle stood at the plate and the others joined in half-heartedly. I could not believe that this scenario had come into play, the waves of shock and anger penetrating every cell of my body.

"What did Esme ask you?" Bella whispered.

I hesitated before I decided to answer. As much as I wanted to protect Bella, she had a right to know the very precarious nature of the situation, especially since it all pertained to her, and whether or not she would live to see another day. "Whether they were thirsty," I answered unwillingly, Bella cringing at my answer, my fists clenching in frustration.

Alice continued to concentrate, trying to see the result of our visitors' arrival. Still, nothing was clear, no doubt because the outcome involved a human, and Alice's visions were always clearer with vampires. The game continued on in apathy, Rosalie and Emmett hovering in the infield, everyone bunting the ball as we waited for their arrival, and in turn our destiny. For now I knew something that was the simple but terrifying truth. If Bella was lost on this day, I would not only mourn for her loss. I would also seek revenge, never resting until my goal was achieved.

I paid no attention to the game, my eyes and mind focused on the forest and Alice's flickering visions. I was so stupid. If I had not selfishly wanted to have Bella with me every minute of every day in order to protect her, this situation would not have eventuated. If I had stayed away from her today, she would be safely at home with her father. How ironic. My desire to protect Bella had once again put her in danger. It was my fault. All my fault. To make matters worse, Rosalie's hatred for Bella seemed to well within her once again as she glared at Bella, nullifying any progress that I may have thought she made. _Of course this would happen! Don't you see the danger you invite when you associate with a human? _In that moment I felt like ripping her throat out. Of course, I had more worrisome issues to deal with at present, luckily for Rosalie.

"I'm sorry Bella," I muttered fiercely, my frustration palpable in light of today's turn of events. "It was stupid, irresponsible, to expose you like this. I'm so sorry."

_I'm sorry too, Edward. I should have been able to see this coming. What use am I if I can't get it right! _Alice's thoughts were as self-deprecating as mine, yet she was not to blame. There was only one person to hold responsible for this entire mess. Me. I had gotten everyone here into this mess, and I was going to have to find a way to get us out with as little bloodshed as possible.

As Alice's thoughts of guilt and disturbing but incomplete visions raced through my mind, my breathing stopped as I realised they had arrived, my eyes honing in on the area beyond right field, the others turning their gaze in the same direction. This was it. Time had run out. They had arrived. And no-one more than I knew what that would bring. It would bring the fires of hell down upon this place and all who stood here within it, as I had no intention of allowing them near Bella and would fight with every last drop of strength I had to save her.

**A/N: I know this chapter was a little shorter, but I had to leave you guys hanging for more! Review folks to keep me wanting to write when I get back online again! Please?**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: If you'd like it continued let me know. Thanks for all your kind words and wonderful reviews. I really and truly appreciate it. I have felt a little despondant regarding this and my other stories lately....so please do your best to encourage me! **

**This chapter and the entire story is dedicated to Jennifer – your kind words and offerings of help from half way around the world were very much appreciated, especially since I was let down by others who had offered their help, only to disappoint me when I needed them. You are a true friend my dear Jennifer! We will be posting chapter 8 soon (which is already written) of Within These Walls. Please do us the honour by reading and reviewing (and give Totteacher credit where it is due – it's her talents that truly shine in our story...ah if only I had a hundredth of your talent my dear)!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Deal with it. (I could imagine James saying this very thing).**

EPOV

The imminent danger hung heavily in the moistened air, magnified by the scents that increased in strength and the claps of thunder that heralded their arrival. How apt. Mother Nature seemed to realise that this was going to turn ugly, unleashing her anger upon this place in preparation for the looming war, the air zinging with electricity in anticipation. My nose wrinkled as the breeze brought forth their scent, surrounding us all, reminding us of their imminent approach. I hated the smell of human feeding vampires. Nothing but pure death swirled around us now, their stench only serving to anger me. How dare they do this? How dare they invade my world and threaten to ruin everything? How DARE they think they could be anything but our enemy? Arrogant. They were nothing but arrogant. The unabated hatred welled within me as I waited, my family and I encircling Bella, the seconds dragging as Alice's silence due to her concentration on her unreadable visions made me want to scream. Time had stood still, giving me far too many moments to ponder.

Of course, they had no idea what they were dealing with. A family of bonded vampires that would stop at nothing to protect not only each other, but would also fight tooth and nail to save the one soul that stood in this clearing. My family's thoughts were united in a closed circle of fierce protectiveness, all directed toward one person. My Bella. My beautiful girl, who had been entangled in a web of danger through no fault of her own, her innocence, acceptance and humanity being her only downfall. Try as I had thus far to be careful of everything I did so as to not put her in danger, here I stood, once again preparing for battle. I always considered myself an intelligent creature, but it seemed to me that I had not learned by my errors, repeating the same grievous mistakes again and again. The constant peril that I threw Bella in a result of my inability to see things as they truly were, were proof of my apparent ignorance and lack of common sense. My character flaws always irritated me, but my lack of foresight, even with the assistance of Alice's clairvoyance, was more than just a flaw. It served to be the catalyst behind Bella's demise. How foolish I was!

Why, oh why did I think that anything less than this could happen? Was I insane? Was I so blind that I could not see the potential danger every time I was with Bella? I knew it was my fault, but this....this situation was going beyond what I thought I could confidently correct without tragedy befalling us. The real possibility of losing her invaded my mind. I had never felt more vulnerable. I had never cared about anything enough before to warrant the fear I felt now, for now I stood to lose the one person here who needed saving more than any other. And it was not because she was human, nor even because I loved her. It was more specifically because she had a soul. A soul that I would sacrifice anything I could to protect. A soul that I felt so connected to, that if it were to become non-existent, so would I.

Bella's face was filled with a panicked expression as she silently stood among her protectors. Mine wasn't. Mine was filled with anger, and Emmett's mirrored mine, his expression coupled with harsh arrogance.

_Let's see them TRY to get to her, Edward, _his thoughts snarled angrily. I loved Emmett's bravado. It never ceased to amaze me. He placed his arm around Rosalie's waist, her brow wrinkled with worry even with her mate's unwavering confidence.

_I will fight if need be Edward. But only to save OUR skin. It's got nothing to do with Bella, just remember that, _Rosalie thought. I nodded at her once, acknowledging that I was grateful that she had yielded somewhat. I did not care about the whys and wherefores, only that she would in fact fight to protect us. All of us. As much as it pained Rosalie, she could see the greater good in doing the right thing here. Her personal issues with Bella would have to be set aside for the moment, and her thoughts reflected her concession to do this very thing.

Alice stared blankly, looking for what was to come, her searches turning up nothing. Jasper watched her, worried for his mate. Images continued to flicker in and out of her mind, thoughts seeping out randomly and without rhyme or reason. _I can't see what's going to happen, _she thought in frustration as her blankly staring eyes searched for answers. I decided then and there that I would have to rely on instinct and reading the minds of these nomads. Alice's predictions were proving to be too unreliable to formulate a concrete plan of action based on them alone.

My eyes darted around the clearing, taking my family in, and I took half a step in front of Bella protectively and braced myself for their approach. Carlisle's inner voice was filled with sorrow as he twined his arm around his wife's waist and squeezed her, watching for the oncoming visitors as he left his wife and stood at the front of the gathering. _Let's try to resolve this peaceably son. If we stay calm things might work out. _

I was not going to bank Bella's life on 'might'. Not that it mattered now. We were out of time. Whatever was fated to be, would be, but as long as I had a body and mind to offer, I would not stop until I made Bella safe. I listened and as I heard their soft footfalls approach the edge of the forest, I steeled myself for the inevitable.

Though I stood upright, my body coiled with tension in readiness as they appeared, their crimson eyes darting everywhere, a few metres between each of them as they attempted to display their dominance. Their gaits were cat-like. They had spent too many months without the contact of others, their manner bordering on feral, evidenced of their self imposed isolation and their threadbare and torn clothing. The dark skinned male led his coven toward us, his thoughts dripping with cautious optimism. He seemed pleased to see us, but at the same time, wary of the fact that he was outnumbered. _Hmmm...I don't know what to make of this. So many of them all together? Oh well, perhaps we can still play. At least there will be plenty of us to make the game more interesting.... _

The dark haired one appeared to be genuine, and none of them seemed to realise that they were in the presence of a human....yet. I sighed, exhaling with relief as I took in the second one, who flanked the dark skinned male as they closed ranks, trying to give off an air of unity. I, of course, knew better. They were no more united than sharks would be in a shared frenzy, and it would not take much for them to turn on each other if threatened. I sensed that their ties were weak at best, and that if things were to go awry, they would be easily divided and conquered. In light of this knowledge, I could not see how they could challenge us and effectively claim victory. It mattered not. I still prepared myself for the worst.

The red haired woman was wild, the leaves that entangled her tresses evidentiary of my theory. She gave off the appearance of a feline, slinking forward, in constant readiness to pounce. Her eyes darted from person to person, her scattered thoughts reflecting her confusion and suspicion of us. She had no idea how to respond to the vampires that stood before her, so instead stood in silence, a nervous, half smile crossing her lips. _So many vampires, but what is it with the eyes? Oh, the girl looks thirsty. Who cares? If they have a place nearby I want to clean up. _I suppressed a growl, unappreciative of this woman singling out Bella, yet at the same time relieved that she had been mistaken for a vampire. These vampires obviously had very little intelligence between them. Of that fact, I was more than relieved.

The dark haired one smiled easily as they stopped and stood some distance away from us. I watched him carefully, but my focus seemed to be drawn towards the unassuming male who stood to his rear, his brown hair tied back revealing his unfeeling eyes in all their glory. He was bored, and looking for a little action. I hoped that playing baseball would suffice, but I did not think that it would. He stared at me for a moment and inhaled infinitesimally, trying to work me out, his thoughts suddenly pouring out of him. _Well, I've never seen eyes like THAT before....what the hell do they eat? They look strange. Oh....now I remember! I have seen this once before....years ago. These ones feed off animals. How disgusting! But there have been some humans here....I can smell them. Hmmm...there is one of them who seems different...she's nice that one. I'd like to.....get my teeth into her. _His thoughts disturbed me to the point of wanting to attack then and there, but I managed to control myself, all the while on high alert as I tried to decipher the tenor behind this particular vampire's inner-workings.

His eyes were upon Bella, and then just as quickly darted to mine, then to the rest of my family and back. Though I wasn't sure how, I immediately knew that he sensed that there was a connection between us all, and his head tilted to the side as he tried to work out exactly what that connection entailed. Though I was thankful that he wasn't thirsty, I was more than aggravated that his thoughts of Bella were so lustful. Even though I hated how he thought of Bella, I conceded that it was better he thought of her in that way rather than in a way that would make her become his next meal. _Well, now I'd like to track HER! She'd make for an amusing plaything, but since HE has such a connection with her, I might leave her be. But I wish she were alone. I'm so bored with everything lately. I wonder what he'd do if I......_

His thoughts had quickly descended into the gutter, his eyes vigilant, his face emotionless which contradicted his mind's inner thoughts. I immediately knew he was a tracker, and was thankful that I had not run with Bella, but at the same time disgusted by his thoughts of her. My fists clenched and a growl threatened to escape my lungs as I used all of my will and strength to stop myself from attacking. I had to distract myself. I could not risk a fight here. It was too dangerous for Bella. I had to focus and consider the implications of this new information. Knowing that he was a tracker, I realised that we would have had no chance of escaping this particular vampire's grasp. His thoughts dripped with lust and determination and his nature was one of impatience, but he also relished a challenge above anything. That could serve to complicate matters, for I knew one thing. No matter what the challenge, I was not going to back down, and now I suspected that he wouldn't either.

Still smiling, the dark haired vampire took a step towards Carlisle, though there was still great distance between us. "We thought we heard a game," he said, his French accent more subtle than his mind's voice. "I'm Laurent, these are Victoria and James," he said softly, gesturing his arms towards the other two in introduction.

"I'm Carlisle. This is my family, Emmett and Jasper, Rosalie, Esme and Alice, Edward and Bella," Carlisle said, pointing towards us, introducing us in groups. I felt a wave of shock course through Bella's body as her heart began to stutter. Still, they had no idea she was human, Bella's pounding heart, I realised, was more attuned to me than any other vampire. They were obviously still far enough away to be out of range of hearing it. Either that, or they were more stupid than I originally ascertained. Poor Bella. This must be so overwhelming for her. She stood her ground, though, and I was most impressed that her human instinct to flee had not kicked in. I was more than grateful that my Bella was unlike any other human in that regard.

_A family? Well that's unheard of! Still, I need some decent conversation, and I want to play. _"Do you have room for a few more players?" Laurent asked sociably. If he didn't feed on humans or keep such dubious company, I could almost envisage this Laurent fitting in quite well here with us, or at least in Denali. I wondered to myself what Tanya would make of him.

_I will try to get them to leave Edward. _"Actually, we were just finishing up. But we'd certainly be interested another time. Are you planning to stay in the area for long?" Carlisle asked, keeping his tone friendly, while his thoughts were begging them to leave. I realised that Jasper had used his gift on us, the conversation now turning casual and friendly, and Bella's now-steady heart evidence of that. I searched Alice's thoughts. Nothing made sense.

"We're headed north, in fact, but we were curious to see who was in the neighbourhood. We haven't run into any company in a long time," Laurent replied, his thoughts approaching desperate to remain in our company. We were not going to be rid of these nomads easily.

"No, this region is usually empty except for us and the occasional visitor, like yourselves."

"What's your hunting range?" Laurent asked casually.

"The Olympic range here, up and down the Coast Ranges on occasion. We keep a permanent residence nearby. There's another permanent settlement like ours up near Denali," Carlisle replied calmly, ignoring the assumption behind Laurent's enquiry.

Laurent rocked back on his heels, shocked by Carlisle's statement. "Permanent? How do you manage that?" he asked, curiosity and excitement overtaking his every thought.

"Why don't you come back to our house and we can talk comfortably?" Carlisle offered, trying to create an opportunity for me to get Bella out of here. "It's rather a long story."

James and Victoria exchanged a surprised look at each other. _Oh, I want a nice long bath. I need to wash my hair, _Victoria thought with vanity.

_Hmmm...that might be nice. At least I'd get the chance to know that dark eyed one. She's so.....mouth watering! _I was really beginning to hate this James.

"That sounds very interesting, and welcome," Laurent said, smiling genially. "We've been on the hunt all the way down from Ontario, and we haven't had the chance to clean up in a while." _If living in a permanent home makes me look like that, perhaps I should investigate this further.... _Laurent thought as he stared at Carlisle, noting his clean appearance and refined stance, which was a far cry from the animals he currently kept company with.

"Please don't take offense, but we'd appreciate it if you'd refrain from hunting in this immediate area. We have to stay inconspicuous, you understand."

"Of course," Laurent nodded. "We certainly won't encroach on your territory. We just ate outside of Seattle anyway," he added, laughing.

_NOBODY tells me where I can and can't hunt! Who do these poor excuses for vampires think they are? _James thought as I sensed Bella's body tense up in response to Laurent's casual remark. I knew we had to get out of here, and Jasper's gift appeared to be waning as James' angry thoughts made their way to the forefront of his mind. I wanted to put as much distance between Bella and this James as was possible. This situation was on a knife's edge at best and as much as I appreciated Carlisle's efforts, my patience was wearing thin. It was of no use to try to be diplomatic when dealing with such primitive beings.

_I think we'd best be out of here. _Carlisle did not need to read minds to sense that something was wrong. His eyes darted towards James and returned to Laurent. "We'll show you the way if you'd like to run with us – Emmett and Alice, you can go with Edward and Bella to get the Jeep."

Just when things appeared to be worsening, Mother Nature took her revenge on us to add to the insult. The breeze blew across the field, ruffling Bella's tresses, causing my body to stiffen. Her scent blew directly towards James. All realising what had happened, the entire family took a defensive stance. I stepped forward and crouched in front of Bella protectively, ready to pounce, letting my pent up anger escape my lungs with a feral snarl.

James mirrored my position, crouching before me, his eyes fixated on Bella as he inhaled her hypnotic scent. _And to think I desired...this...human? Bah! Though she might make for a nice meal..._

"What's this?" Laurent exclaimed in surprise, finally inhaling Bella's scent and making the same realisation as James. James feinted to the side, trying to get to Bella, and I moved to block him, never taking my eyes off him. Victoria's eyes darted everywhere, her thoughts confused by this situation, readying herself to run.

"She's with us," Carlisle said firmly, his eyes fixed on James.

"You brought a snack?" James asked incredulously as he took a step forward, his eyes never wavering from his prey. In response I threw my head high, my lips curling above my bared teeth as I let go with another more guttural snarl which echoed around the open field. Laurent, feeling threatened, took a step back. James did not.

_Well, well. HE thinks he can keep her away from ME? Well now I want her more than anything! Who does he think he is? Does he honestly think he can deny me? This hunt is going to be more fun than I've had in decades! Look at the challenge! A large coven of vampires protecting her! And to top it off, a vampire who sees this human as more than a pet. Surely he doesn't.....Yes he does! He cares for her! Well NOW THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST GAME EVER! I can't wait to start the hunt tonight! _What had I done?

"I said she's with us," Carlisle reiterated with force.

"But she's HUMAN," Laurent protested, obviously astounded at the notion of us keeping company with their source of food.

"Yes," Carlisle said, Emmett at his side, flexing his muscles in intimidation. _Just try it James. Go on! I dare you! _Realising he was outnumbered, James rose slowly from his crouch, but his eyes never left Bella. His nostrils were flared, no doubt to take in all of our scents and commit them to memory in readiness for the hunt, as his body straightened. Things could not possibly get any worse.

"It appears we have a lot to learn about each other," Laurent said in a soothing tone, trying to diffuse the situation, his thoughts of concern and of embarrassment. At least one of them had the sense to consider the real danger here, and the scruples to realise that James was crossing the line. I hoped that he could influence James to reconsider his plans, but knew in my heart that James was not one to take advice easily, unless it suited his selfish desires. And when it came to the hunt, I knew he would be unstoppable, never listening to reason, and only acting on his primal instincts.

"Indeed," Carlisle said coolly.

"But we'd like to accept your invitation," Laurent said, his eyes glancing towards Bella and the back to Carlisle. "And of course, we will not harm the human girl. We won't hunt in your range, as I said."

_Won't hunt in their range? That's what HE thinks! How dare he speak for me! _James glared at Laurent, his thoughts protesting Laurent's statement. Victoria just watched and waited for someone to make the next move, her eyes darting between those who spoke. I sensed that she felt more attached to James than Laurent, but knew that she was the sort of vampire who would go wherever the strength lay. I also sensed that I was wrong. James was this coven's leader. Laurent was just the mouthpiece, his way with words being put to good use by James to get what he wanted.

Carlisle measured Laurent's open expression. _Perhaps this Laurent may assist us with this situation Edward. _"We'll show you the way. Jasper, Rosalie, Esme?" he called. We gathered together, converging around Bella protectively, blocking their view of her. Alice stood by Bella's side and Emmett backed away from them towards us, neither of us taking our eyes off James.

"Let's go Bella," I said in a low, bleak voice, the horror of this situation hitting me from all sides. Bella was stunned with fear, I realised, frozen where she stood as if she were a stressed vampire. I took her by the elbow, dragging her away from his hypnotic stare as we headed towards the edge of the forest. Alice and Emmett remained close to us, hiding Bella from the hunter's glare. Bella stumbled as we walked at human pace towards our destination, my patience now non-existent. I was fighting every urge to pick her up and run, but knew that would only provoke James to begin the hunt immediately. We needed to get away from here so that we could formulate a plan and hopefully prevent the hunt from commencing in the first place.

_I still can't see anything clearly Edward, but I don't think it's a good idea to run alone with Bella. _Alice's thoughts flickered through my mind as I saw James hunting us in her prediction, relentless in his search of Bella and I. I continued to focus on remaining calm. They watched us as we slowly approached the fringe of the forest.

_I can't wait to taste that one! See you soon BELLA!! _The murderous fury welled within me as we left their sights, James' vile thoughts of how he would hunt and kill Bella lingering in my mind. I knew that whatever Carlisle had planned to do was an exercise in futility. James was not going to stop, no matter how articulate and logical Carlisle's arguments were, or how convincing Laurent tried to be. I picked Bella up, the anger burning within me, waiting to find release. I began to run, Alice and Emmett trailing behind as the unabated rage pushed my body to a speed that I had never experienced before. Bella clasped onto me, this run probably making her fearful instead of ill, her heart pounding against my back a living breathing reminder of the peril that she now faced.

We reached the Jeep in a matter of moments, and I quickly opened the door and threw Bella into the backseat as the anger burned me through to my bones. "Strap her in," I ordered as Emmett slid into the seat next to Bella and grasped the harness and quickly strapped Bella in. Alice got into the front seat next to me and I started the engine, immediately planting my foot on the accelerator as we swerved backwards and spun around to face the winding road. I glanced into the rear view mirror. Bella's face was fearful. She had never seen me like this, poor girl. Now was not the time for comfort. It was the time to take evasive action. There was no time to waste. I had to get her out of here.

I growled a string of profanities in frustration, directed at the man who stood to take everything away from me, my mind getting ahead of itself as I made the agonising decision that would change Bella's life forever. I could not take her home now. Not ever. He would track her down and kill her if I did. The thing that I always feared most was finally happening. My family and Bella were being ripped away from everything they cared about. I knew that the sacrifice was worth it, but I also knew that it would have a profound, long lasting effect on us all when all was said and done. But now, there was no other choice. Alice sensed my anger.

_Focus Edward. We need to figure out what to do. Perhaps we need to get her away from town at least until we figure things out, _Alice thought, agreeing with me to some extent, as she stared out the window, looking for any signs of the hunter. Of course, my idea of leaving was of a more permanent nature. Did she not understand that James was NEVER going to stop? Emmett covered the back, his eyes searching for any signs of movement within the darkened forest, his sympathies with Bella, but his thoughts regretful that he didn't tear James limb from limb.

We hit the main road and I made a left, turning away from the direction of Forks. Bella immediately noticed that we were going the wrong way. "Where are we going?" she asked. I could not answer her. Not without upsetting her. Not without frightening her. Emmett and Alice's thoughts reflected mine, and the silence seemed to cover us like a wet blanket, the only noise of comfort being the Jeep's engine.

"Dammit, Edward! Where are you taking me?" Bella shrieked.

"We have to get you away from here – far away – now," I replied coldly, my anger hidden just beneath the surface as I focused on the road. I could not look at her, the shame and anger I felt exposing my every flaw. I felt as though I was kidnapping the poor girl. I knew that she would hate me for this. I was taking her away from her only family, but what else could I do?

"Turn around! You have to take me home!" she screamed in protest as her hands tore at the straps. Of course I could not allow her to break free. She would be hunted and killed in an instant. I needed to push aside my human frailties and bring forth the cold-hearted analytical vampire that lurked within me.

"Emmett," I said, catching his gaze in the mirror. He nodded once and secured Bella's hands, stopping her from releasing herself from the harness. Then the words that I dreaded most of all left her lips, her realisation of what was happening finally dawning on her.

"No! Edward! No, you can't do this!" she cried, tearing my heart out of my chest with every angry word.

"I have to Bella, now please be quiet," I said, my voice devoid of emotion, the vampire in my heart ringing loudly as I pushed my human side way down into the depths.

"I won't! You have to take me back – Charlie will call the FBI! They'll be all over your family – Carlisle and Esme! They'll have to leave, hide forever!" she shouted. Of course, she would not think of the danger she was in, only the danger this posed for my family. I had to ignore her emotional protests. I had to remain on task. I had to be cold, hard and unfeeling if I wanted to keep Bella alive. I had to become the worst version of myself....

**A/N: Thank you for the honour and privilege of writing this for you. I am unsure if I can continue and for that I do apologise. SEE THE NEXT PAGE....PS: IF YOU LIKE READING JAMES READ CHAPTER 8 OF WITHIN THESE WALLS! HE'S TRULY EVIL!!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: I am so very humbled by your response, so much so that I'm tapping at one more chapter for this. You know, you guys are just great! You got me to 100 reviews! Wow!**

**I am setting you another challenge....I'd love 120 reviews by the end of this chapter to inspire me to write further! (She says as she digs her heels into the ground stubbornly). I need your ongoing support! **

**STORY ALERT: *WITHIN THESE WALLS* IS HEADING TOWARDS ITS CLIMACTIC ENDING! WE WILL BE POSTING CHAPTER 9 SOON SO PLEASE GIVE IT A READ AND REVIEW! I WOULD LIKE TO REACH AT LEAST 30 FOR THIS STORY (ONLY 17 AT THE MOMENT FOR 8 CHAPTERS??? – OH C'MON!! I KNOW YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT FOLKS!!! TOTTEACHER AND I HAVE POURED OUR HEARTS AND SOULS INTO IT SO GET TAPPING! PWEASE?????)**

EPOV

My cold analytical side dominated every nerve and fibre of my body. It had to. If it wasn't there, I would be falling apart before her very eyes. There was no room for that now. No room for error. I had to remain on task. I could not let my emotions get away from me. Not now. Not now that I stood to lose her.

Poor Bella. Once again, thanks to me, the ire of my world had been brought down upon her, but this....this was not going to be as easy to escape from. Up until this day, it was all to do with my battles with self control, or lack thereof, and nothing to do with anyone else. This was another beast entirely. This was another vampire threatening her very existence. A vampire that I was no match for, I feared. A vampire who did not care about anything but the hunt, and who saw Bella as nothing more than his latest source of amusement.

If it were just for his amusement, I knew I had a chance to convince him to stop. However, there was one significant difference in this situation, which had driven him to rise to this particular occasion with unmitigated fervour. After I had inadvertently thrown down the gauntlet, my anger had served to give this tracker what he relished above anything else. The challenge of hunting Bella and taking her life, DESPITE the fact that a coven of vampires protected her. He held nothing but contempt for me because of my choices, and wished for me to pay dearly, making this kill all the more satisfying. As I pondered, I knew one thing over everything else. I knew that he would never stop until he had succeeded in his quest and satisfied his unquenchable thirst for her blood, and reap all the rewards that killing Bella would bring. He craved this victory more than anything. His thoughts were beyond obsessed by it. He wanted to fly in the face of danger to achieve his goal. It's what he existed for.

Why had I not killed him then and there, when I had the chance? Why had I not at least tried to run to protect the rest of my family? Why did I have to drag everything I loved down with me to hell itself, behaving as selfishly as I possibly could for my own self-gratification? My hands gripped the steering wheel, my rage threatening to tear it off as I drove like a madman.

"Calm down Bella. We've been there before," I lied coldly, mechanically as my steely gaze focused on my mission. I could not look at her, lying as I was. Ashamed as I was. Angry at myself as I was. Of course we had never been there. No vampire in existence ever had.

"Not over me you don't! You're not ruining everything over me!" Bella shrieked with futility, thrashing violently with all her might against the iron grasp of Emmett. It got her nowhere. I knew I was ruining everything, and need not be reminded of that fact. After all, my very existence had guaranteed her ruination.

_You stop this Edward, and stop it now! You're scaring her!_

"Edward, pull over," Alice suggested, her voice smooth in comparison to her thoughts as she undoubtedly tried to keep calm for Bella.

I shot her an icy stare, at the same time planting my foot on the accelerator, silently conveying to her that I had no intentions of doing as she had requested. She was not helping this situation by asking me to stop driving Bella away from the danger that lurked back in Forks. What the hell did she think that would achieve?

_Edward, you need to stop and think about this. You're not thinking rationally. Think about Charlie!_

"Edward, let's just talk this through," she added, her voice unshakably serene. This only served to anger me further, my blood beginning to boil within me at her utter contempt for this situation. Did no-one else here understand what was at stake?

_Listen to Alice. You need to think about what you're doing, man. _Emmett was NOT helping matters.

My body shook, the anger swirling within me, imbibing my senses, and I was unable to hold my tongue any longer. "You don't understand!" I roared, spitting venom at the window, my heart breaking as I caught Bella wincing in the rear view mirror. "He's a tracker, Alice, did you SEE that? He's a tracker!" I hissed through clenched teeth, my knuckles straining against the soft steering wheel as I tried but failed to keep control of my burning rage.

_WHAT THE HELL! A TRACKER? _Emmett shouted in his thoughts, his body stiffening as I glanced at him in the mirror.

_I'm sorry Edward, but it doesn't change the fact that you're kidnapping Bella! _ "Pull over Edward," she said, trying to use her best authoritative tone. I didn't care about Alice's opinion or her futile attempts to get her way. My mind was made up. I pressed my foot further down on the accelerator, taking our speed up past one-twenty, determined to get Bella out of this place as quickly as possible.

"Do it Edward," she reiterated. Why was Alice torturing me so? Was she that ignorant? It was obvious that I was going to have to spell it out for her.

"Listen to me Alice. I saw his mind. Tracking is his passion, his obsession – and he wants her, Alice – HER, specifically. He begins the hunt tonight."

_Oh no! Why couldn't I see it? _

_Not if I can help it! He won't get to her Edward. I'll see to that. _As much as I appreciated his determination, his confidence was misguided at best, or at worst could get him killed. Emmett did not have the wiles that I knew James possessed in abundance.

"He doesn't know where..."

I interrupted Alice and seethed, "How long do you think it will take him to cross her scent in town? His plan was already set before the words were out of Laurent's mouth," I left out the fact that his initial plan was to have Bella in a completely different way, and I was not sure what disgusted me more. Bella gasped, once again catching my attention. I glanced into the mirror, the horror on Bella's face unable to bear, the rage within me companioning itself with a searing, blistering pain.

"Charlie! You can't leave him there! You can't leave him!" Bella shouted, her body thrashing against Emmett so much this time that I could feel her heat and anger radiate from her every pore. It was horrible. I despised myself. I could not believe that I was putting her through this trauma, and yet...there it was. My selfishness causing Bella immeasurable pain once again. What the hell was wrong with me?

_She won't get over this bro._

I shook my head, pushing Emmett's thoughts away. "She's right," Alice agreed. I took my foot off the accelerator, my anger still raw, but Alice took it as a sign that my resolve was weakening. That could not have been further from the truth. Alice was merely provoking me to pull over and shake her to within an inch of her existence. "Let's look at our options for a moment," she said, attempting to coax me to agree with her. I wanted nothing more than to make her understand exactly why I was doing this, so I took my foot off the accelerator and screeched to a halt on the side of the highway, killing the engine. Bella's body made a thud against the seat as my sudden stop caused her to rattle around in the harness.

"There are no options!" I hissed angrily.

"I'm not leaving Charlie!" Bella yelled, her words fighting ones. As much as I empathised with her, it didn't matter. I ignored her protests, my hardened heart easily able to resist her outcries.

_C'mon Edward. We don't have to run. We can take him down so easily! _"We have to take her back," Emmett said, voicing his thoughts. I knew how much Emmett relished a challenge, but this was beyond ridiculous.

"No," I said coldly, my determination absolute.

"He's no match for us, Edward. He won't be able to touch her," he voiced further.

"He'll wait," I explained, knowing that to be the awful truth. He would wait for an eternity to take Bella.

"I can wait too," he said, smiling into the rearview mirror.

"You didn't see – you don't understand. Once he commits to a hunt he's unshakable," I said, my words giving me an idea, and providing me with the only possible way of getting out of this situation. "We'd have to kill him."

_Who cares? I'll be damned if I'm gonna let James break up our family. _"That's an option," Emmett said unfeelingly. It wasn't as if he hadn't killed before, but our life choices had made it necessary for us to change what was part of normal, natural instinct to most vampires. Emmett knew there was no alternative, just as I knew. After all, it was no contest. The world would be a better place without the existence of likes of James and alternatively, the world, at least MY world, would crumble if Bella were ever taken away from it.

"And the female. She's with him. If it turns into a fight, the leader will go with them too," I warned, knowing that we would be up against not one, but a guaranteed two feral vampires, with Laurent a distinct possibility to follow.

"There are enough of us," Emmett replied with confidence. _Bring it on!_

"There's another option," Alice said quietly, a flicker of thought racing through her mind. It was an image of us back at the Swan household, though this prediction seemed to change shape and the outcome was unclear. I would NOT allow that unpredictable scenario to come into play, my resolve to get us as far enough away from home as possible unwavering.

I turned on Alice in fury, and snarled, "There – is – no – other – option!"

I felt Emmett and Bella's eyes bore into me. Bella's heartbeat sped up, my anger and this situation no doubt overwhelming her. Alice remained calm, her unsurprised demeanour not only challenging me, but further angering me. Like animals wanting to assert their dominance, Alice and I stared each other down, neither of us wanting to concede defeat to the other.

As the air inside the confines of the Jeep grew thick with tension, the only sound was of Bella's rapid breaths and her pounding heart. Her scent was there as well, reminding me why I was doing this. As the moments passed, the image of Alice's prediction became clearer as if someone had suddenly made a decision.

"Does anyone want to hear my plan?" Bella asked, breaking the silence, her heart practically pounding out of her chest. Now I knew why the prediction was there. Bella had been formulating a plan in her mind and was steeling herself to convince us of its validity. I knew that for it to succeed I would need to agree and though I was suddenly curious as to how she would achieve it, my mindset was still unable to shift from my original plan of fleeing to keep her safe.

"No," I growled, unable to concede.

"Listen," Bella pleaded. "You take me back." Was she INSANE?

"No," I repeated, interrupting, my voice monotone. I turned away from Alice and to Bella, her jaw set, her face flushed with the determination that I sensed was rising in her.

_For heaven's sake Edward, listen to her! Stop being so stubborn and give in! _ Alice thought, then added further, _Don't you see Edward? We need to go back to Forks._

Bella glared at me and took a deep breath before speaking. "You take me back. I tell my dad that I want to go home to Phoenix. I pack my bags. We wait till this tracker is watching, and then we run. He'll follow us and leave Charlie alone. Charlie won't call the FBI on your family. Then you can take me any damned place you want," Bella said, challenging my reasoning more than Alice ever could, her assurances giving me pause to think. I stared at my love, stunned by her surprising calmness in the face of adversity. Her determination to break through my anger and reach into me further than anyone could never ceased to amaze me.

_That's my girl! _Alice thought as she stared at Bella, equally stunned.

_Well, what do you know...the human outthinks the hundred year old vampire! Hah! _"It's not a bad idea, really," Emmett said, his surprise by Bella's clear and concise idea causing her to glare at him. It appeared that she thought she had been insulted, his look of surprise overly done.

"It might work – and we simply can't leave her father unprotected," Alice said, three sets of eyes suddenly boring into mine, willing me to change my mind.

"It's too dangerous – I don't want him within a hundred miles of her," I argued a little less convincingly, fearing I was fighting a losing battle.

"He's not getting though us," Emmett said confidently.

Alice thought for a moment, her prediction showing James watching but not attacking, and said finally, "I don't see him attacking. He'll try to wait for us to leave her alone."

"It won't take long for him to realise that's not going to happen," I said, knowing that he would eventually be driven to attack to get what he wanted.

"I DEMAND that you take me home," Bella said firmly, trying to ram home the argument being made by Alice and Emmett.

I pressed my fingers to my temples and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to control my anger, and trying to think rationally. Was I just being too pig-headed to see that they were right? Was there another way?

"Please," she begged, the liquidity of her voice beginning to melt my resolve away, threatening to crumble my hardened heart.

I considered my options. Though I knew that Bella was doing this for the wrong reasons in that she was trying to protect a coven of vampires from being hunted by the FBI, I realised that her idea would, at least, give us a chance of keeping Charlie safe.

I didn't look up, my voice worn as I spoke. "You're leaving tonight, whether the tracker sees or not. You tell Charlie that you can't stand another minute in Forks. Tell him whatever story works. Pack the first things your hands touch, and then get in your truck. I don't care what he says to you. You have fifteen minutes. Do you hear me? Fifteen minutes from the time you cross the doorstep."

How she did it, I don't know. She never ceased to amaze me. Once I was on a path, especially angered as I was, my usual stubborn nature prevented me from being swayed from it, yet Bella Swan had once again achieved the impossible by getting this determined vampire to reconsider his decision. Though I was willing to concede, it would be under my terms. I would not, could not risk anything to chance.

I started the engine and pressed down hard on the accelerator, spinning the wheels as I turned the Jeep back towards the danger that, up until now, I had been trying as mightily as possible to keep Bella away from. I must have been crazy.

"Emmett?" Bella asked.

"Oh sorry," he said, releasing his grasp from her. There was a silent pause between us, and even the thoughts of Alice and Emmett were mute. It gave me a sense of relief, and further time to fine tune our plan.

"This is how it's going to happen. When we get to the house, if the tracker is not there, I will walk her to the door. Then she has fifteen minutes," I said as I glared at Bella in the rearview mirror to make it known that I would not budge further. "Emmett, you take the outside of the house. Alice, you get the truck. I'll be inside as long as she is. After she's out, you two can take the Jeep home and tell Carlisle."

_Like I'm gonna miss all the fun? _"No way, I'm with you," Emmett interjected.

"Think it through, Emmett. I don't know how long I'll be gone." I was prepared to stay away for as long as it took. It was my fault after all, and I had to make things right. I did not want anyone else caught in the crosshairs.

"Until we know how far this is going to go, I'm with you," he pressed.

I sighed. Did he not understand that I was trying to save him from himself? "If the tracker IS there," I continued grimly, "we keep driving."

"We're going to make it there before him," Alice said with confidence as she saw James arrive outside the house just in time before we left. It seemed I had little choice but to believe that she was right.

"What are we going to do with the Jeep?" she asked.

"You're driving it home," I said, perplexed by Alice's question.

"No I'm not," she replied, her voice calm once again. This pixie would be the death of me! Why was she always saying black when I said white? I directed another stream of profanities under my breath towards my sister as I tried to restrain myself, and retain some form of civility. It wasn't working too well. Her thoughts clammed up, as did her mouth, as I attacked her verbally.

"We can't all fit into my truck," Bella whispered. I continued my foray directed towards Alice, not really absorbing what Bella was trying to say.

"I think you should let me go alone," she added, her voice barely a whisper this time. This time though, I needed to respond.

"Just do things my way, just this once," I said, clenching my teeth so much that I felt my entire jaw ache. Why was Bella always trying to think of ways to put herself in further danger?

"Listen, Charlie's not an imbecile," Bella protested. I was, however, beginning to worry about Bella's faculties. "If you're not in town tomorrow, he's going to get suspicious." As was expected, Bella was still trying to protect my family above everything, including her own life. I had to make her see that it did not matter.

"That's irrelevant. We'll make sure he's safe, and that's all that matters," I said with logic. Then, Bella made a very relevant point, though one that I was pained to agree with.

"Then what about this tracker? He saw the way you acted tonight. He's going to think you're with me, wherever you are."

_Man, this girl's on a roll. _Emmett stared at Bella again, surprised by her comments yet again. Yet again, Bella shot him a disapproving stare, no doubt taking his astonishment as an insult to her intelligence. "Edward, listen to her," he urged. "I think she's right." I didn't care if she was right. I could not fathom the thought of being apart from her, not protecting her. Not being near the one thing I cared about more than myself. Leaving her open, vulnerable, to James' advances.

"Yes she is," Alice said, finally breaking her silence. _And Edward, I know what the tracker wants. He wants to see you suffer. If you leave together, he will get what he wants._

"I can't do that," I said icily.

"Emmett should stay, too," Bella continued, seemingly ignoring my protests. "He definitely got an eyeful of Emmett."

"What?" Emmett said as he turned towards Bella. _What, so now you've got Bella in cahoots with you Edward?_

"You'll get a better crack at him if you stay," Alice said. So NOW they wanted me to leave Bella to fend for herself? Now I knew something to be fact. They were even crazier than I.

"I can't do that," I repeated, but I knew that I was going to lose this argument. Even though I feared to leave Bella, their logic was beginning to wear me down. I gazed into the rearview mirror at Bella, her brow raised at me in challenge, whilst at the same time a half-smile caused her mouth to curl up on one side of her face. She knew she was beginning to penetrate my resolve.

"Hang out here for a week..." Bella said as my eyes widened in the reflection of the mirror, and she immediately knew that a week was not a feasible proposition. A DAY without her would be torture, particularly under these circumstances. "...a few days," she corrected. "Let Charlie see you haven't kidnapped me, and lead this James on a wild-goose chase. Make sure he's completely off my trail. Then come and meet me. Take a roundabout route, of course, and then Jasper and Alice can go home."

"Meet you where?" I asked, curious now as to what idea she could be concocting in that confounding mind of hers.

"Phoenix," she replied matter-of-factly. Why on earth would I agree to that? Of course, we were going to make James think that she was headed there....but to...actually go to Phoenix?

"No. He'll hear that's where you're going," I said, becoming impatient.

"And you'll make it look like that's a ruse, obviously. He'll know that we'll know that he's listening. He'll never believe I'm actually going where I say I am going."

"She's diabolical," Emmett chuckled. Diabolical was an understatement.

It was still a risk. I knew that James somehow possessed a feeling about his prey. After all, he had already detected that I had feelings for Bella, and all without the assistance of being a mind-reader. "And if that doesn't work?" I questioned.

"There are several million people in Phoenix," she informed me. When would Bella realise that there were ways and means around finding people? Even humans could easily track others of their kind down.

"It's not that hard to find a phone book," I argued. And in turn, her delicious scent.

"I won't go home," she said absolutely. Where on earth would she go then?

"Oh?" I inquired, beginning to become anxious about the direction this was headed.

"I'm quite old enough to get my own place."

_Yay! This is going to be great! I've always wanted to see Phoenix!_

"Edward, we will be with her," Alice reminded me.

"What are YOU going to do in PHOENIX?" I asked scathingly. It was in the middle of a desert, for heavens' sake.

"Stay indoors," Alice replied. _I'm not going to argue with you about this further Edward. You know she's right._

_And we can hunt this James and corner him. Then I'll have the pleasure of taking him out. _"I kind of like it," Emmett said, hiding his excitement about hunting the hunter.

"Shut up Emmett," I said.

_Just hear me out, Edward. _"Look, if we try to take him down while she's still around, there's a much better chance that someone will get hurt – she'll get hurt, or you will, trying to protect her. Now if we get him alone...." Emmett trailed off, smiling evilly as he continued idea within his mind. _I can tear him limb from limb and burn his sorry bones. The end._

With Emmett's lingering thoughts of burning James and dancing around his ashes, I realised we were approaching our destination. My thoughts now wandered towards Bella, and how I would now have to leave her in the hands of my siblings. The agony I felt at the very thought of leaving her burned relentlessly through my body. I knew that if anything happened to her, I would have to ask my family to destroy me. I refused to live in a world where Bella Swan did not exist.

"Bella," I said softly, as Alice and Emmett stared out the windows, their eyes scanning the territory. "If you let anything happen to yourself – anything at all – I'm holding you personally responsible. Do you understand that?" Of course, what I was saying was ridiculous, for if anything did happen to Bella, she would not be alive to be remonstrated with.

"Yes," she gulped.

I turned to Alice and said, "Can Jasper handle this?" I did not need the worry of Jasper's erratic control issues to be added to this situation.

"Give him some credit, Edward. He's been doing very, very well, all things considered. I had to agree with her to a point, though I knew Jasper's thinking more than Alice did.

"Can YOU handle this," I asked, staring at Alice, seeking some sort of assurance.

_Edward Cullen! If you weren't under so much stress with this, I'd be offended!_

And with that, my sister pulled back her lips in a horrific grimace and let go with a guttural snarl so loud, that it caused Bella's heart to skip a beat. I smiled at her briefly, but then chose to remind her of her responsibilities. "But keep your opinions to yourself," I muttered. I did not need Alice filling Bella's head with the frightening consequences of her ever-changing predictions.

We drove slowly down the streets of Forks. I took in every street lamp, every curve of road and every tree that lined the outskirts of this place. I wondered if we would ever have a happy life here now, or whether that ideal was gone forever. Then my thoughts turned to Bella. I listened to her heart, which had now calmed into a rapid, but steady beat, and allowed its sound to envelop my senses, committing that sound to my memory. I closed my eyes and inhaled her beautiful scent, and once again committed it to memory, allowing it to invade my lungs, the burn as ever, pleasure mixed with pain. I listened to her breathing, which was too rapid for it to be normal, and fantasised about her hot breath against my skin. I longed for Bella. I loved her more than my life. And now, I was preparing to leave the woman I loved to hunt for this monster. We turned the corner to the top of her street.....

**A/N: I had to stop it here, as the Goodbyes chapter would make it too long. So, how about a review? 120 is the target! Then I will write the soppy bye-bye chappie! **


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Well here it is...a little Easter present just for you! Thanks to you guys I've now written the next chapter and, as ever, I am truly amazed by your responses. This chapter also interconnects with the chapter Totteacher and I wrote about James picking up Alice's scent in Within These Walls (Jaspers little rose of Texas lol). It's also got a lot of emotion in it and many hidden thoughts. ENJOY!**

**To my friend Jennifer: Without your support, I wouldn't be doing this. Remember that you have changed my life for the better my friend. And that is a gift that keeps on giving. **

**Disclaimer: I promise with all my heart that I don't own Twilight, Edward, Bella or any other characters or stories. Life's not fair, is it?**

EPOV

Like a beacon in a stormy ocean, Charlie had left the lights in the Swan home blazing as he waited for his daughter to return home. Without him realising it, he could be waiting for her to come home for the last time, and would remain, I hoped, as oblivious to the oncoming tempest as was possible. As we pulled up slowly, I purposely stayed away from Bella's truck, giving us wide berth to scan the perimeter of the truck and the house.

My eyes darted around the yard and towards the house as I cut the engine, my ears pricking for any signs of James. There was nothing but an eerie quiet. I could not even hear crickets chirping. Perhaps they sensed the looming danger. Perhaps nature was warning me of what was to come. Alice and Emmett were on high alert as was I, but their thoughts and the surrounding scents indicated that James wasn't here. I was more than pleased that Alice was correct. We had beaten him home.

"He's not here," I said tensely, glancing towards Bella's beautiful face which glowed under the hue of the night as it shone through the window of the Jeep. She was, as always, breathtaking. I knew we had little time left together, and though it broke my heart, I knew we had to press on. "Let's go," I said, the tension never leaving my voice as I opened the door, my eyes and ears listening and watching for any signs of danger. I had to fight my every instinct and stick to our plan. Oh, how I longed to take her in my arms and run!

Emmett reached over and undid the harness with ease and said cheerfully, "Don't worry Bella. We'll take care of things quickly here." And then, my heart wrenched as I studied her face closely and saw a tear running down her beautiful cheek. After all, she was preparing herself to say goodbye to each and every one of us, sooner or later. I shuddered to think how she would respond to bidding Charlie farewell if she was this upset about saying goodbye to Emmett. Then I wondered how she would react when saying goodbye to me. This was going to be a torrid time for her.

_Aww, poor Bella. She's....so....human! _Emmett wasn't used to showing his emotions, but with Bella, he seemed to take exception, even if only in his thoughts. _Edward, you make sure she gets out of there safely. She's...she's just great. _I knew that both of them had genuine feelings for one other. This only further served to steel my determination to get through this alive. Bella had become just as much a part of my family as any of the others now. I knew that without doubt. There was much more at stake than I ever imagined possible.

"Alice, Emmett," I commanded as we all got out of the car, trying to focus on what needed to be done, once again trying to push my emotions away. As if she could read my mind as well, Alice left me with one final thought before she left.

_It's going to be fine Edward. I know this is going to be hard for Bella, but I also know that you can get her through this. _

I nodded towards Alice in thanks, and they both glanced at me briefly in acknowledgement and silently disappeared into the darkness to scout the familiar area of forest that surrounded this place. A forest that I knew so well, every undulating rock formation, leaf, tree and blade of grass committed to my memory forever. It was, after all, the place that led me to paradise, and to the closest thing I would ever get to heaven.

I opened Bella's door for her and took her hand, and wrapped my arm around her shoulder protectively as she alighted from the Jeep. There was no doubt about it. I could not, no, WOULD not ever be without Bella and once this was over. I planned to never leave her side. The electricity that I had almost become immune to with constant contact with her seemed to be more prevalent than ever, no doubt due to the high emotions emanating from Bella and the fact that she hadn't been in my arms for some hours now. My eyes darted everywhere as I swiftly led her away from the Jeep, my ears listening for any signs from Alice or Emmett that James was close. So far, he had not graced us with his presence.

_Nothing so far, Edward._

_All clear to the north, bro. _

"Fifteen minutes," I warned under my breath. I didn't even care if James turned up now. Either way, we were running. Either way, I was keeping her safe. Either way, I was leaving her in the hands of others. My stomach twisted at that very worrisome thought. The thought of being apart from my Bella. I watched her carefully and her tears continued to flow as we approached our destination, wanting more than anything to cut and run, even if it was just to be with her for a minute longer, or to comfort her, and to hold her in my arms.

"I can do this," Bella said, her eyes suddenly showing thought and steely determination behind them, which in turn rubbed off on me. I still wondered, though, what was going on in that beautiful head of hers.

We walked up to the porch and stood under its welcoming light, and I stared at her face, trying to read the unreadable. Bella reached up and placed her hands either side of my face, her eyes looking fiercely into mine. I stopped breathing for a moment, her glorious beauty too much to bear, as if I were staring directly into the sun. And then, she said the words I always longed to hear, no matter how often I heard them.

"I love you," she said in a low, intense voice, her eyes melting as if on fire. "I will always love you, no matter what happens now." I realised that she was worried. As worried about what was to come as I was. This plan HAD to work. Had to.

"Nothing is going to happen to you, Bella," I assured her, wanting to be right more than anything. Wanting to take her in my arms and hold her forever. Hoping that this would not be the last time she touched me.

"Just follow the plan okay? Keep Charlie safe for me. He's not going to like me very much after this, and I want to have the chance to apologise later," she said. What WAS she going to say to Charlie? My mind started to wander, just as Emmett's thoughts came through.

_He's approaching from the north bro. Just caught a whiff of his scent, but I can't see or hear him. Sheesh I'd like a shot at him now....oh well we will just stick to the plan I guess. I'm no good at this damned tracking! Anyways Edward I think you've got about a six minute window before he reaches the house._

Just then, Alice was within range as well, her thoughts permeating my head in a near echo. _He's going to take the bait Edward, I've just seen it. Get Bella into the house and have her give us the acting performance of her life! I'll come in closer and find Emmett and take the Jeep and follow, and Emmett will join you when she's on the road. Good luck guys!_

"Get inside, Bella. We have to hurry," I said, my voice urgent as I heard that the tracker was on his way. I heard Charlie pacing the floor in the living room, his thoughts of an impatient and worried tenor while he waited for his one and only daughter, his only family, to return to him. This was going to be horrible. I was directly responsible for tearing this man's heart out by taking away the one person he cared about and held dear in his life. I knew now that even if I had a soul, it mattered not. I would still be damned to eternal hell for my behaviour.

She had not taken her hands off me. Her pupils dilated and her heart raced as her eyes glued themselves to mine, as if she were trying to convey something unspoken to me with them. The mere presence of her warm, inviting skin on mine automatically drew me in as I leaned in to her without realising, my face inches from hers. She was magnificent! She held me there, hypnotically trapping me in a cocoon that was uniquely hers, her scent driving me to the point of madness before she spoke. "One more thing," she whispered, her voice smooth and liquid, her passion flowing through me along with her glorious scent and the familiar electricity. The slow burn began its path through my body once again, a burn that I craved more than anything, as I waited for her to continue, her tears still flowing. "Don't listen to another word I say tonight!"

Before I could articulate a question to ask her what she meant, she stood on her toes and leant up to kiss me, her lips pressing against mine in a most wonderful way, taking me completely by surprise. I knew she was trying to kiss me with as much force as possible as her lips met mine, yet they felt nothing but soft, warm and oh so inviting! No sooner had her lips met mine, than they were gone once again.

She turned and kicked the door open violently. I was frozen in my place, still trying to recover from our unexpected kiss, when she yelled, "Go away Edward!" before running into the house and facing me for a split second. I stared at her with shock at what she was doing, the anger crossing her beautiful face. What WAS she doing? What had I said? As I contemplated what could possibly have happened, she slammed the door in my face.

"Bella?" Charlie said as he stopped pacing.

_Nice performance Bella! Edward, you'd better focus. Get her out of there as quickly as you can. James is closing in on us._

_Oh...nice burn Bella! That's harsh bro! I've just found Alice. We'll fall back so he thinks he's got a way in._

I shook my head, trying to regain my senses. Of course, Bella had decided that adding our fallen relationship would convince Charlie further of her determination to leave, but it did not stop me feeling hurt. I also wished that she had let me in on her plans. As I stood there for a second longer, the cutting voice of James' mind permeated my thoughts, triggering me to move.

_Hmmm....I can smell roses. Where have I smelt that before? Oh that little vampire in the clearing. She thinks she can stop me? She's nothing but a child....though something seems familiar. Wait! There's the smell I want! Edward....and.....BELLA! Mmmm....tasty! Oh, she's going to be SO delicious. I'm so going to enjoy killing her. I might keep him alive just enough to make him watch as I do whatever I want to her. I might play with her a little to make it last longer....I'm going to have such fun with this one. SUCH FUN!_

A deep growl threatened to find release from my chest as I heard him. HE. WAS. MINE. Never since I had embraced this way of life had I ever felt so compelled to take another life. Not only was I compelled, but I suddenly could not wait for him to be in my sights! I stopped myself from releasing my pent up rage, realising that I might be heard, and focused on the task at hand. There was no room for error. Not now. I needed to get to her room and get her the hell out of here and draw James away from Charlie, and towards his inevitable doom.

"Leave me alone!" Bella screamed at her father as she sobbed loudly. My heart was breaking, tiny shards of it falling away piece by agonising piece. I was in mourning for Bella and the loss that she would now have to endure, and the loss that her father would also have to face now. And it was ALL MY FAULT.

I heard her determined footsteps as she made her way upstairs where she slammed the door shut and locked it. On high alert, I made my way to the familiar tree and waited, scanning the perimeter of the forest briefly before I watched as Bella leant under the bed to retrieve her duffel bag. She then reached between the mattresses to retrieve a pair of socks, throwing them into the bag that she held. What was she doing? She was going to take all night at this rate! I needed to help get her packed or we would not get away in time. I opened the window silently, smoothly, and entered, my feet feather light as they landed on the floor of her room, just as Charlie's fist pounded on the door.

"Bella are you okay? What's going on?" he said in a frightened voice. It was about to get much, much worse for poor Charlie. I stood back, Bella still unaware that I was there, as Bella's tirade towards her unsuspecting father continued. I took the opportunity to grab the keys to the truck and put them in my pocket. There was no time to lose.

"I'm going HOME!" she shouted, her voice breaking under the strain of her words as she faced the door, no doubt longing to comfort her father. I was glad I could not see her expression.

"Did he hurt you?" he asked, his voice verging on anger, the tenor of his mind near psychotic. I was also more than glad I had more than human strength and speed, and could therefore not be killed so easily, knowing how much Charlie must hate me at this very moment. He wasn't the only one. I hated myself for putting Bella and her father through such emotional turmoil.

"No!" she shrieked in a high pitched, almost desperate voice. She turned away from the door, and headed towards her dresser. I was there immediately, yanking the drawer out and grabbing at random clothing and throwing handfuls of them at Bella. The pain etched across her face would forever be burned into my psyche as she looked at me momentarily before focusing on packing her things.

"Did he break up with you?" Charlie asked, his voice perplexed, his thoughts changing to ones of love and protectiveness, though the anger still bubbled beneath, waiting to be unleashed.

"No!" she yelled again, stuffing all of the clothes I handed her into the bag. I emptied another drawer and threw its contents at Bella, which she swiftly stuffed into the bag as well, filling it to the brim. I hoped that she had everything she needed, not having time to really take note of what she was packing.

"What happened, Bella?" he shouted, pounding on the door, the anger returning with interest.

"I broke up with HIM," she shouted in return, struggling as she tugged on the zipper of her bag in her attempts to close it. Her heart was racing so much, that it gave me cause for concern. I calmly pushed her warm hand away and smoothly zipped the bag shut, watching her tear-streaked face as I carefully placed the strap of the bag over her shoulder. I wanted nothing more than to take the pain away for her, but felt helpless to do anything more except to help her pack. This was a pain that she would have to work through alone, as would Charlie. And for Charlie, things were about to get a whole lot worse.

"I'll be in the truck – go!" I whispered as I quickly pushed her towards the door, sending her on her way to do one of the most difficult things I could ever imagine anyone would have to do. I stared at her longingly as she opened the door before quickly turning and ghosting through the window.

I paused for a moment in the tree and listened for any signs of James or his coven. Only four minutes had passed, yet it felt like an eternity. The only sounds I heard came from the house as Bella ran down the stairs and began the inevitable argument with Charlie.

I leapt from the tree and landed on the ground with a soft thud as I headed towards the truck, my eyes darting around as I opened the door quietly and got in. I removed the key from my pocket and put it in the ingnition, trying to save as much time as possible, then ducked my body down within the cab, my eyes just above the level of the window as I watched, waited, and listened.

"What happened? I thought you liked him," Charlie said, as I caught sight of them through the kitchen window. Charlie had a firm grip on Bella's elbow, and though his face was bewildered, his grasp appeared to stop her in her tracks. I hoped more than anything that she would be able to find a way out of the house without me having to ruin everything and assist her.

_Where the hell is this place? Oh, there's the scent. Mmmm. Delicious. I wonder if Bella is a virgin? It might be fun to find out! _My teeth clenched as I fought back the urge to hunt down James right now and kill him, his thoughts so disgusting, so deplorable, that I felt my vampiric side rise within me, pushing down the human side as if it were a small blip on the radar. The taste of revenge dripped from my venom-coated tongue, flooding my mouth, my body readying itself for battle as every muscle within me tensed. I was more than willing to kill this particular creature. I smiled evilly at the very thought of tearing his body apart limb from limb and burning the jagged pieces.

_He's not far Edward. Is Bella out yet? We're following James' scent in now. I don't smell the others now, but I caught the woman's scent further out a minute ago. Be careful what you say Edward and watch out for him and Victoria. He'll probably be able to hear what you say now, so Bella had better make it good! _Alice's thoughts brought me back from my reverie, and I knew that Bella needed to get out of there as quickly as possible. I did not want James too close. I was happy for him to track us from a distance, and as much as I relished the idea of getting this over with now, fighting him here would risk too many lives and raise far too many questions.

I saw Charlie spin Bella around to face him, his face filled with determination as he tried to prevent her from leaving. Then, a sadness crossed Bella's face for a brief moment before she glared at her father in challenge. I was certain that she had NEVER looked at him that way before. She was preparing herself to deliver the final blow.

"I DO like him – that's the problem. I can't do this anymore! I can't put down any more roots here! I don't want to end up trapped in this stupid, boring town like Mom! I'm not going to make the same dumb mistake she did. I hate it – I can't stay here another minute!" she spat, every word flying out of her mouth like a dagger through the Charlie's fragile heart.

His hand dropped from Bella's arm as if he had been electrocuted, his face filled with shock and unadulterated pain.

"Bells, you can't leave now. It's nighttime," he whispered, trying to beg Bella to see logic and reason.

Without turning she replied steadily, "I'll sleep in the truck if I get tired." This exchange was so heartbreaking to watch, that I felt I had to turn away. Of course, turning away would not block their conversation from my all-hearing ears.

"Just wait another week," he pled. "Renee will be back by then."

_What's this then? Bella and...who else can I hear? Fighting? Well I wonder what that's all about. Well this just adds to the intrigue VERY nicely._

James was listening now, so I knew he was close. Bella needed to hurry, but at the same time let James hear where she was going. My eyes darted everywhere, searching for any signs of movement, before I fixed my gaze on the love of my life once again.

"What?" she said, her voice faltering, her body hesitating at the kitchen door.

I mouthed the words 'come on Bella' to myself, willing her to turn the knob and walk out the door. This was cutting things way too close, and she needed to get out of there within the next thirty seconds.

"She called while you were out. Things aren't going so well in Florida, and if Phil doesn't get signed by the end of the week, they're going back to Arizona. The assistant coach of the Sidewinders said they might have a spot for another shortstop."

I watched as Bella shook her head, undoubtedly trying to regain her composure after hearing this unexpected news of her mother. "I have a key," she muttered, turning the knob of the door. Charlie extended his hand towards Bella, his expression unfathomable. Bella looked at his hand and then turned her gaze to his face and added in anger, "Just let me go, Charlie." She finally opened the door and said, driving the final nail in the coffin, "It didn't work out okay? I really, really HATE Forks!"

With her words cutting through Charlie like a scythe, he stood there in the doorway, motionless, unable to move a muscle to pursue his daughter. The pain, confusion and sadness was so clearly written on his face that I thought he would remain that way forever. His fragile heart had been broken by the only one he cared about, the only one he loved. A sense of loss and sorrow overwhelmed me for a moment as I felt his pain, his anguish.

Bella ran towards the truck and threw her bag into the bed of the truck, and wrenched the door open, the waiting key in the ignition enabling her to start the truck immediately. "I'll call you tomorrow!" she yelled, her voice filled with pain and anguish as she got in the truck and started the engine.

_Where IS she going? Looks like I will have to follow her. Hmmm...she said something about Florida? No...it was Arizona. Surely she would know I would be listening. Well, well, well. This IS getting interesting._

Bella pressed the accelerator as far as it would go and lurched away from the curb, momentarily oblivious to my presence as her thoughts of Charlie's pain enveloped her.

_Edward, I'm nearly there. Emmett's going to following Bella's truck and will catch up shortly. James has changed his course and is following you to the west of the roadway, a minute or so behind you. Be careful, Edward!_

I reached for Bella's hand, her skin hotter than ever under my touch, her heart pounding out of her chest as I touched her. "Pull over," I said calmly as she checked the rearview mirror. I followed her gaze, her father still standing there in the doorway as he watched her leave, the image of him disappearing as we reached the end of the street thoroughly heartrending.

"I can drive," she said through a torrent of tears, her anguish palpable. I needed to take matters into my own hands. Bella was in no fit state to drive.

I placed my hands around her waist and pushed her foot off the accelerator with my own. I pulled Bella across my lap, pulling her hands free from the wheel and moved into the driver's seat.

"You won't be able to find the house," I explained rationally. Poor Bella. I could literally hear her heart breaking.

_I'm right behind you! _Alice thought as she flashed the Jeep's headlights, signalling me that she was following. In response, Bella stared out the back window, a look of terror on her face as her poor heart picked up its pace once again. _Emmett's running between us. He'll catch up any second._

"It's just Alice," I explained quickly, taking her hand in mine, trying to alleviate her heightened emotions any way I could.

"The tracker?" she asked anxiously.

"He heard the end of your performance," I said grimly, knowing the pain that she had put herself through, all because of me.

"Charlie?" she asked, her face filled with dread.

"The tracker followed us. He's running behind us now."

_Hmmm...so that CHILD is following her....and the big one! Well let's just see where they lead me. THIS is going to be even MORE fun now!_

Bella's body tensed, undoubtedly feeling frightened by the thought of James actually pursuing us now. Upon hearing James' thoughts, I knew that with the added presence of Alice and Emmett, he would not risk attacking here and now.

"Can we outrun him?" she asked with futility.

"No," I replied softly as I pressed on the accelerator as far as it would go, causing the engine to whine in protest as Bella turned back to stare at the Jeep.

_It's just me bro! _I heard as Emmett jumped onto the back of the truck, causing Bella to emit a bloodcurdling scream. I immediately placed my hand over her trembling mouth and said, loudly but without threat, "It's Emmett!" She immediately stopped her scream, but her heart told me that she was not coping.

I sensed every nerve jangling within her fragile body, and immediately took my hand away from her mouth and wound my arm around her waist. "It's okay, Bella. You're going to be safe," I promised. I hoped I would be able to honour THAT particular promise. Everything was riding on it to be true.

We drove through the town to the north highway, James' thoughts silent for a moment. _I saw him briefly as we turned onto the highway Edward. He's hanging back. He's not going to do anything but follow. _Images of Alice's prediction flowed through my mind. We were going to make it to the house without incident.

Bella's body was beginning to relax, but I felt I needed to distract her from the terror of this situation. "I didn't realise you were still so bored with small-town life," I said, trying to make idle conversation. "It seemed like you were adjusting fairly well – especially recently. Maybe I was just flattering myself that I was making life more interesting for you."

"I wasn't being nice," she confessed, looking down at her knees. "That was the same thing my mom said when she left him. You could say I was hitting below the belt."

Poor Bella. The hurt she felt she had caused Charlie was written all over her. "Don't worry. He'll forgive you," I said as she turned to face me, watching as I attempted a smile. I wasn't even sure if I WAS smiling, knowing how she felt. Her face turned desperate, the panic brimming from within her as she searched my face for some assurance.

"Bella, it's going to be all right," I murmured, trying to convince myself just as much as I was her.

"But it won't be all right when I'm not with you," she whispered in return, her words echoing through my mind, tearing at my resolve. I felt the pain she was feeling now, my realisation of parting from Bella becoming all too real for my liking. In abstract, our plan was simple, yet logical. In reality, I knew that once we parted, it would tear a hole in me so deep that I knew it would never heal until she was safely in my arms once again. And that moment was looming all too quickly.

"We'll be together again in a few days," I said, tightening my grasp around her. "Don't forget it was your idea."

"It was the best idea. Of course it was mine," she replied quickly, causing me to smile bleakly at her for just a second. Once again, my smile did not hit the mark, my sadness and fear interfering with any genuine expression of happiness as James' thoughts interrupted mine.

_What the hell? Their scents are everywhere! I'd better circle back and meet Victoria until they move. Victoria's scent was out by the river back there...... _His thoughts began to fade, and right away I knew that he was headed in the other direction. It would give us time to leave without risking challenge. I knew he hadn't given up, though, and was just biding his time until the opportune moment arrived.

"Why did this happen?" she asked, her voice catching in her throat. "Why me?"

That was the million dollar question. Why Bella indeed. Because I was an egotistical fool, perhaps?

I stared at the road ahead, trying to think of a way to make her blameless in this matter, the hatred for myself raging within me. "It was my fault. I was a fool to expose you like that," I said, my self-loathing unable to be suppressed.

"That's not what I meant," she insisted, once again trying to let me off the hook. "I was there, big deal. It didn't bother the other two. Why did this James decide to kill ME? There're people all over the place, why me?"

As much as Bella was trying to find answers to relevant questions that did not point the finger of blame directly at me, I could only point the blame at myself yet again in answer to this question. I hesitated, trying to find a way of telling her the truth without tipping her over the edge. I knew I had to tread warily, to try to remain as close to the truth as possible without frightening her further. She had already endured so much tonight.

"I got a good look at his mind tonight," I began in a whisper. "I'm not sure that there's anything I could have done to avoid this, once he saw you. It IS partially your fault," I said wryly. "If you didn't smell so appallingly luscious, he may not have bothered. But when I defended you....well that made it a lot worse. He's not used to being thwarted, no matter how insignificant the object. He thinks of himself as a hunter and nothing else. His existence is consumed with tracking, and a challenge is all he asks of life. Suddenly we've presented him with a beautiful challenge – a large clan of fighters all bent on protecting the one vulnerable element. You wouldn't believe how euphoric he is now. It's his favourite game, and we've just made it the most exciting game ever," I said finally, quoting his thoughts.

I paused for a moment, the grim reality of the situation causing me to feel helpless. "But if I had stood by, he would have killed you right then," I said with frustration.

"I thought....I didn't smell the same to the others....as I did to you," she said hesitantly. She was still more appealing than most. I knew this in no uncertain terms. Even Alice had commented on the appeal of Bella's scent.

"You don't. But that doesn't mean that you aren't still a temptation to every one of them. If you HAD appealed to the tracker – or any of them – the same way you appeal to me, it would have meant a fight right there."

Bella shuddered, my embrace trying to offer her comfort as I squeezed her body gently.

"I don't think I have any choice but to kill him now," I muttered, suddenly thinking of Carlisle's reaction. "Carlisle won't like it."

_It doesn't matter bro, we HAVE to do it. Carlisle's just gonna have to understand. _I had nearly forgotten that Emmett was there. Our conversation had taken on a life of its own, and I knew that I craved to talk to Bella now any way I could, so much so that I did not even care that our intimate moment had been overheard by Emmett.

We crossed the bridge, and were nearly home. I felt torn. I knew that the plan was working well, but with that, I also knew that I would be parted from Bella all too soon. Alice's prediction had panned out as she had said. We would now be able to enter the house without fear of being attacked, and to continue with the execution of Bella's plan. A bittersweet feeling of relief overtook my senses.

"How can you kill a vampire?" Bella asked, drawing my attention back to her with her predictable question.

I glanced at her, pained at responding to her question, but coming to the awful conclusion that she had a right to know. "The only way to be sure is to tear him to shreds and burn the pieces," I said, waiting for her reaction.

Without batting an eyelid, she asked, "And the other two will fight with him?"

I replied quickly, amazed at her resilience and apparent acceptance of what I had just said. "The woman will. I'm not sure about Laurent. They don't have a very strong bond – he's only with them for convenience. He was embarrassed by James in the meadow...."

And then she began to get upset once again. "But James and the woman – they'll try to kill you?" she asked, her voice raw with emotion.

It amazed me that Bella remained so calm when discussing her own demise, yet when it came to the subject of my family or myself getting hurt, she would get so upset. "Bella, don't you DARE waste time worrying about me. Your only concern is keeping yourself safe and – please, please – TRYING not to be reckless."

Ignoring my plea, she asked, "Is he still following?"

"Yes. He won't attack the house, though. Not tonight," I replied vaguely, leaving out the details of where exactly James was.

I turned off into the driveway that led to our safe haven, with Alice following closely behind.

_All clear around the perimeter Edward. _Emmett confirmed what I already knew, but it comforted me nonetheless. _I'll carry Bella into the house. _He added fiercely, protectively. I knew I had to allow him this small concession. He cared for Bella so much.

We drove up to the house, every light illuminating our way home. Emmett leapt off the back of the truck and opened Bella's door for her before I came to a complete stop. As I cut the engine, Emmett pulled Bella out of her seat swiftly and with ease, tucked her closely into his chest and ran her up the porch steps and through the front door.

I got out of the Jeep as fast as I could and Alice and I blurred to through the door a split second behind them. Before Carlisle and the rest the family could warn us of what was to come, we were already standing in the living room, gobsmacked at the sight of Laurent standing amongst my family. Emmett set Bella down carefully next to me as he growled, ready to pounce. My entire body tensed and I bristled at the presence of this vampire, my instinct to attack overwhelming.

_I've already told Carlisle I'm not going to harm anyone! James has done nothing but cause me problems! I hope they don't attack! _Laurent's mind was certainly not one of aggression, but of remorse mixed in with annoyance and fear.

_He's trying to help Edward. Just talk to him._

As much as I wanted to believe Carlisle, I knew I had to tread warily.

"He's tracking us," I said, glaring at Laurent menacingly.

Laurent's face turned serious as he replied, "I was afraid of that." _I'm so sick of James and his theatrics. _

Realising that Laurent posed no immediate threat, Alice went to Jasper's side and whispered in his ear, "We need to get ready. You and I are leaving." Jasper shot her a puzzled look before looking at me and turning to follow Alice. They flew up the stairs and disappeared, readying themselves for the long trip ahead.

Rosalie watched them leave and then turned to stand beside Emmett. _Where the hell are they going? Our family is being torn apart, and it's all because of her! _Rosalie glared hatefully at Bella as her thoughts seeped from her mind and invaded mine. I had no time for them, yet I knew that Bella was still hurt by her furious stare.

"What will he do?" Carlisle asked of Laurent.

"I'm sorry," he apologised. "I was afraid, when your boy there defended her, that it would set him off."

"Can you stop him?" Carlisle asked with futility. I already knew that there was no stopping James.

Predictably, Laurent shook his head and replied, "Nothing stops James when he gets started."

"We'll stop him," Emmett promised. _Well I can't WAIT to kill THIS guy!_

"You can't bring him down. I've never seen anything like him in my three hundred years. He's absolutely lethal. That's why I joined his coven," he confirmed.

Bella's expression was one of realisation. She had not, until this very moment, realised that James was the leader in this coven.

Laurent was shaking his head again, and he glanced at Bella, perplexed by her presence, then back to Carlisle. "Are you sure it's worth it?" he asked.

I suddenly saw red, my surge of rage unable to be held within me. I brought all the anger I had felt on this day and released it from my chest, roaring at him, letting him know in no uncertain terms that I did NOT appreciate his question. This caused him to cringe and immediately back away. He knew he was outnumbered, and knew he needed to behave impeccably to get out of here alive. Carlisle may have been willing to forgive Laurent for his comment, but I, on the other hand, was ready to have his head.

_Just keep calm Edward. I'll deal with this. _Carlisle looked gravely at Laurent and said, "I'm afraid you're going to have to make a choice." Laurent deliberated for a moment, his thoughts sure and steady as he scanned every face in the room. He was planning to sit on the fence, and not get involved. I made note of the fact that Laurent remained loyal to no-one, as was the case for most vampires. I had hoped that he would be different, somehow convincing myself that he would fit well in Denali. Now, I was not so certain.

"I'm intrigued by the life you've created here. But I won't get in the middle of this. I bear none of you any enmity, but I won't go up against James. I think I will head north – to that clan in Denali," he said, hesitating. It appeared that Carlisle had been singing the praises of life in Denali, and for that I was grateful, but I also hoped that he would do the right thing by them. As much as I did not see an immediate threat being posed by Laurent towards my family, I also felt that he changed to suit whatever situation he found himself in, and if he were so influenced, he could turn against anyone. That had the potential to create a very dangerous situation indeed.

Interrupting my thoughts, Laurent continued. "Don't underestimate James. He's got a brilliant mind and unparalleled senses. He's every bit as comfortable in the human world as you seem to be, and he won't come at you head on....I'm sorry for what's been unleashed here. Truly sorry," he said as he lowered his head, whilst at the same time glancing briefly at Bella with a look of puzzlement.

"Go in peace," Carlisle said. _He won't be any further assistance, Edward. As he has mentioned, I have suggested he move on to Denali. At least that will mean that there will be one less vampire to worry about. _Laurent took another long hard look at the family before him, united in purpose and unwavering in loyalty, and hurried out the door. I waited for him to be out of range, his thoughts now directing him towards the search for Denali, and I nodded towards Carlisle once they had faded, letting him know that we could speak freely.

"How close?" Carlisle asked of me as Esme moved to the keypad on the wall and pressed the buttons that would release the metal shutters on the glass wall, sealing the house securely. Bella's mouth gaped open as she watched Esme's every movement.

"About three miles out past the river; he's circling back to meet the female."

"What's the plan?" he asked further.

"We'll lead him off, then Jasper and Alice will run her south."

"And then?"

As much as I knew it was going to upset Carlisle, there was no alternative. I stared at him with a deadly expression and answered, "As soon as Bella is clear, we hunt him."

"I guess there's no other choice," he agreed grimly. I was relieved that I was to hear no argument from Carlisle on this matter. He had obviously been considering the options in my absence, and as Emmett and I had concluded, he also knew that there was no alternative. Things had become to serious to consider letting James out of our sights.

As I pondered, a thought suddenly occurred to me. If we wanted to be more certain that James would believe that Bella was leaving here, we would need to have her scent follow the truck out, convincing anyone who drew near that she was indeed in the truck and not back home. I turned my gaze to the bristling Rosalie, sizing her up and down and then locking my gaze on hers. "Get her upstairs and trade clothes," I commanded, causing Rosalie to stare back at me with livid disbelief.

"Why should I?" she hissed out loud in indignation, showing no cause for concern for Bella's feelings. "What is she to me? Except a menace – a danger that you have chosen to inflict on all of us."

Bella flinched as she stood beside me, reacting to the venom in Rosalie's words.

"Rose...." Emmett murmured as he placed a hand on her shoulder. Rosalie immediately shook him off. _Aww man, this is driving me crazy! _

I should have expected as much, and chose to ignore her childish behaviour. I did not even have the energy to become angry with her. It was easier to pretend that she did not exist. "Esme?" I asked calmly.

"Of course," Esme murmured, who was at Bella's side in a heartbeat, swinging Bella up into her arms and dashing up the stairs before Bella had time to react.

"What are we doing?" Bella asked breathlessly as they entered Carlisle and Esme's bedroom.

"Trying to confuse the smell. It won't work for long, but it might help get you out," Esme replied. I hoped that they would not take long.

"I don't think I'll fit....." Bella said, hesitating. And then there was silence as Esme, I was certain, was helping Bella get dressed.

Alice waited for Bella at the top of the stairs, while Jasper headed towards me, after Alice had filled him in on the plan. "Jasper, you WILL show restraint, won't you!" I warned, not even articulating it as a kind request.

His eyes narrowed at me as he replied, "Yes of course, Edward. Just trust me this once." I knew that his patience regarding our concern for his thirst had been wearing thin of late, and his thoughts reflected those feelings. _You know, Edward, I would have thought you would trust me, considering the circumstances. _

"Okay Jasper. Fine," I conceded, not having the time or the energy to argue with him. I needed to focus on sticking to the original plan. Emmett picked up the backpack that contained our supplies, some cash and spare clothes, and slung it over his shoulder.

"I'm coming with you Edward. We will need to outnumber them if the woman becomes involved," Carlisle insisted. I knew how much it would kill him to destroy another life, even that of one such as James.

I placed my hand on his shoulder and said genuinely, "Thank you, Carlisle."

"Esme, Rosalie, you take the truck and try to lead them away," I said, Rosalie shaking her head in defiance as I spoke.

"Carlisle, I think this is a mistake. We should not get involved in this," Rosalie said coldly, knowing that if she could get Carlisle to change his mind, he may be able to coax the others to follow. She turned her gaze to Emmett and then to me, her thoughts begging me to stop. _I don't want Emmett hunted down and killed Edward! You can't do this!!_

Carlisle's eyes followed Rosalie's and he immediately knew what she was thinking. "I know you're worried about Emmett, Rosalie, but Edward has chosen to be with Bella. Bella is just as much a part of this family as any of us, and we look after our family. ALL of our family," Carlisle scolded firmly.

Jasper stared at Rosalie, whose angry stare was directed toward Carlisle, trying to figure out if he should use his gift on her. _Sheesh, everyone's all worked up aren't they? _Jasper noted.

As much as she hated to admit it, Rosalie usually gave Carlisle what he wanted, even though it was, on many occasions, reluctantly. She nodded silently at Carlisle, but her expression remained unchanged.

Bella and Esme were now at the top of the stairs, having changed clothes, and both Esme and Alice took one of Bella's arms and raced her down to meet us. Carlisle looked at Esme longingly and handed her a brand new silver cell phone. Without a word, Carlisle also handed a phone to Alice, and she placed it into it the small leather bag that she carried, after which she joined Jasper. Bella watched everyone's movements carefully, and her heartbeat was steady and true, which was remarkable under the circumstances.

"Esme and Rosalie will be taking your truck, Bella," I said as I passed and headed towards Emmett, standing next to him in readiness to leave. Bella nodded in agreement, her eyes glancing at Rosalie, no doubt noting Rosalie's glowering, resentful stare directed squarely towards Carlisle.

"Alice, Jasper – take the Mercedes. You'll need the dark tint in the south," I said as both of them nodded in agreement.

_Don't worry Edward. We'll take care of Bella. I know how much you're going to miss her, but try to be strong for her sake Edward. _I knew that Alice was right, but logic wasn't exactly at the forefront of my mind when it came to Bella Swan. Never was, never will be. Otherwise we would not be standing here, going through what we were now.

"We're taking the Jeep," I said as Carlisle stood next to Emmett and me. Bella looked at the three of us as we stood together, and realised that Carlisle was also part of the hunting party, looking as shocked as I felt that he would want to go.

"Alice, will they take the bait?" Carlisle asked. We all watched as Alice closed her eyes and became still, her gifted mind searching for what was to come. I followed her mind's travels as she thought, her vision coming through clearly now. This plan was going to go like clockwork.

Alice opened her eyes and said, "He'll track you. The woman will follow the truck. We should be able to leave after that," she said with certainty. This was indeed good news. That was, until Carlisle's words made me realise that I had run out of time.

"Let's go," Carlisle said as he walked towards the kitchen.

My heart lurched. This was it. I was about to leave her, and could not stand the thought, yet there it was, looming just as large as the night would always turn to day. That, I feared more than anything, for by the time this particular night was over, so would be my close proximity to Bella. I had to say goodbye to her, and did not care that my family was watching. I was at Bella's side in an instant, and had her in my arms just as quickly, crushing her body to mine. Once again, I was sorely tempted to run away with her, but knew that I had to stay on the path that I had originally chosen. I pulled her soft, warm face, towards mine, lifting her feet off the floor. I kissed her sweetly, but necessarily briefly, her soft lips melting under the hardness of mine. As our lips released and I set her down, my heart began to break. Bella stared longingly into my eyes, the desolation I felt within me hitting me hard, even though she was still near. I was already mourning her loss and yet had not left her side.

_Edward, we have to go, _Carlisle reminded me gently as I saw the predictable tears forming in Bella's deep brown eyes. I turned and walked away, and did not look back, for fear I would not have the strength to do what was necessary. We left the house quickly, stealthily, and blurred to the Jeep within seconds.

We stopped at the Jeep, our eyes darting everywhere, searching for danger. "Come on, Edward. Let's get this done and then you can go get your girl," Emmett said as he slapped me on the shoulder and headed for the drivers' side. We got into the Jeep and as Emmett started the engine, and headed down the road, a flash of red blurred through the forest towards the direction of the house. My stomach tightened. As was predicted, Victoria was there to assist her leader.

As we approached the river, James' thoughts came through loud and clear.

_Ah, here they come. It's just as well I sent Victoria in to see what's going on at the house and follow the rest of them out. She's been so handy lately! _

"He's following us, running on the western side of the road about a minute or so back," I said to Carlisle. "And Victoria's definitely heading in," I added. He immediately took the phone from his pocket and dialled.

"Esme, you and Rosalie take the truck now. You'll probably come across the woman about a mile or two out, so do your best to draw her away from the house," he said, hanging the phone up immediately and handing it to me.

As the precious moments passed, my thoughts turned to Bella. I felt a terrible sensation as I tried to sob, mourning for the loss of Bella and for leaving the woman I loved behind. Of course nothing, no tears of any kind, escaped my eyes.

Finally, the phone rang and I answered immediately. "The woman's on our trail. It seems she has taken the bait," Esme said, her voice sounding relieved. "We're over three miles out now, so it's clear for Bella to leave."

Without as much as a goodbye, I hung up and called Alice, speaking coldly into the phone. "The woman's on Esme's trail. Time to go," I said, hanging up before I was tempted to ask to speak to Bella, my voice monotone, defying what I truly felt inside.

I wanted more than anything to not only speak to Bella, but to stay with her tonight. I craved her body, her mind, the softness of her skin, her warmth and her lips more than I had ever craved anything on earth, her intoxicating blood included. And now, it was gone. All gone. We drove on into the night, the unleashed monster stalking us ever closer, my heart continuing to break into millions of tiny pieces as the hole in my chest finally made itself known.....

**A/N: Happy Easter: I don't want chocolate eggs for Easter...just lots of review please!**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Thanks as always to my faithful readers for reviewing! You are the reason I'm so motivated to continue! This chapter is all me and has very little dialogue from the book, with Edward's hunt for the naughty James, so I would appreciate your feedback on this one in particular. There are going to be plenty of nasty words from James with his POV for good measure! I must say I enjoyed writing him...he's SO evil! **

**I would like to thank in particular the following readers for their unwavering support (and apologies for misspelling I'm doing this from memory): Totteacher, mouse555, Lisa12345, Twilight-BellaC, FYInichole, animal8, twilightprincess45, NCCullenlover0613, Unknowngirl, Wolfshadow31, twifantasyfan, fairusa, deanie, dazzleglo, secretlamour, and jia225 (where are you hun? I need your wonderful reviews!) lol. **

**AND TO JENNIFER AND MICHAELA: THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO YOU GUYS! YOU'VE GIVEN ME NOTHING BUT KIND WORDS AND TERRIFIC SUPPORT FOR THIS AND MY OTHER PROJECTS AND IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU I WOULD NOT BE TAKING THE LEAP I'M ABOUT TO TAKE WITH MY OTHER STORY, HEART OF DARKNESS! WISH ME LUCK GUYS AND HUGS ALL ROUND!!**

**Totteacher and I have posted chapter 9 of Within these Walls and are writing Chapter 10, the next exciting bit with Alice's vision of her lovely Jasper (hubba hubba) so....please read and review! You know you want to...!!**

**Disclaimer: I don't pretend to own Twilight, but could I just daydream for a little while?**

EPOV

Time had stood still. This particular night hung heavily, threatening to choke the very breath out of me, and more than anything I desperately needed the time to pass and for two more days to dawn. I could not believe that things had come to this. Of all things that could happen in my entire existence, no prediction from my all-seeing sister could have prepared me for the feelings that now had hold of my every nerve, which lay exposed and jangling for all the world to see. A pain that I had never experienced before was now deeply entrenched within my chest, like a spreading disease slowly eating away at me, radiating from the centre of my body and spreading outwards. Though I was an immortal, this pain now threatened to take me under forever, and I wondered if I would ever recover. Of course, there was only one thing that would heal my gaping wound now. Bella. I had to make this work or die trying. There was no other choice to be made any longer. I would not live with this pain or without my love for another moment longer.

I closed my eyes and remembered everything about her. Images of her heart-shaped face flooded my mind, causing me to sigh. She was everything to me, and she meant so much more to me than anyone else ever had or ever would. Then I searched my mind and drew out her scent from its depths, lifting my hand to my nose and inhaling, remnants of her unique perfume still on my unyielding skin as my sigh deepened further. My mind was clear, blocking out the thoughts of those around me, and was only focused on one thing. The love of my life. I longed to feel her sweet lips on mine and to bathe in the exquisite burn that her breath and kiss caused within me. I ached to touch her soft, warm skin and feel her pulsating blood beneath it. I pined for the sound of her heart, which spoke volumes to me when she was near and also comforted me as nothing else would. She was the essence of my life and the very core of my being now and I knew that would no longer survive in this cruel, unforgiving world without her. I smiled as I saw her face blush within my mind, and I was momentarily swept away in the fantasy that took hold of every part of me, leaving everything else behind to fade into the background. Fantasy was all I had left to hang on to now, however I knew that fantasising about her was nothing like the real thing, and that was the very thing that I was fighting for now.

"Edward!" Carlisle hissed as he prodded my arm, no doubt irritated that I was ignoring his thoughts. I opened my eyes and scowled at him in response, resenting him taking me away from my waking dream. "I think you need to focus," Carlisle said in a kinder, muted tone as he cleared his throat.

"Ha ha Edward. You're in deep trouble now!" Emmett howled. _This is gonna be so exciting! I love a bit of action! _I realised that Emmett was in his element now, the challenge of taking James down invading his every passing thought. I listened to his thoughts as he imagined various ways that he would kill James, some even of a torturous nature, as his anger at him over wanting to kill Bella spurred him on. As ever, I was glad that Emmett was on my side.

"Stay alert and keep it down, Emmett. Let us focus on what needs to be done please," Carlisle disciplined as his phone rang.

"We're out of range from the woman darling, so I thought I'd give you a quick call, but just listen if you can't speak," she whispered over the phone. Carlisle did not answer but allowed her to continue. "We've led her out of the area. We're going to spread Bella's scent around the forest to the west of the river and work our way west to keep her away, and buy them some time. If we lose her we'll head back to Charlie's," Esme said as I heard Rosalie hiss in protest in the background, "Her scent is everywhere in this godforsaken dinosaur!" Oh, how I wished I could spirit myself away to that truck and inhale that heavenly aroma once again!

"Alright. We won't be able to call you, but...." Carlisle said as I placed my hand on his shoulder and shook my head for him to be quiet as he reluctantly stopped speaking. "Bye," he whispered as he hung up. He was just about to remind Esme that we were drawing James north, as his thoughts continued to spill from his mind. _Edward, don't forget we need to continue north towards Canada, away from town and Bella, and then ambush him. Remember the clearing on that two day hunt we took where that mountain peak overlooked Vancouver? I think that will be the ideal place_. James was within range again after having dropped back to check on anyone's approach from behind, Emmett having slowed the Jeep to nearly a crawl to keep him on our trail and draw him away.

_Who's that talking? Ah...it's that stupid vampire who thinks he's so damned superior! I've NEVER seen such a weak coven leader! Must be all that filthy animal blood!! Hmmm...I'd better meet up with Victoria to find out what's happening with the others....._

"He's back now, but I think he's dropping back again," I mouthed, signalling for Emmett to stop, to which he nodded in understanding. "We need to keep our voices down," I continued. I knew that it was going to be difficult to communicate with the others without giving our plans away, this cat and mouse game beginning to grate on my nerves already.

_We may not be able to call anyone until we're sure that he's out of range. This is going to make things more difficult, but we can't risk it. He keeps backing away and closing in again._

I nodded towards Carlisle in agreement as Emmett's thoughts came through. _Well him listening is gonna make it harder, but hey, I like a challenge! Looks like we're on our own Edward! _

"I think he's out of range at the moment. I can't hear him, but he isn't far. We just need to keep him tracking us, then draw him north to the clearing near Vancouver," I whispered near silently, listening for any signs of James. Echoes of his thoughts were there, but I could not hear him speak. He was just out of reach of my range. "No phone calls until we know he can't hear us," I said, reiterating Carlisle's thoughts to Emmett.

JPOV

I could NOT believe the fun I was having! Today had turned into one surprise after another and I was absolutely buzzing! This was more than I could ever expect since I had been changed into the hunter I was now. And, that was a very long time ago. I couldn't even remember how old I was any more, having lost track of the years, the decades. I never celebrated such frivolous things as birthdays. I didn't even know the date of my change, but it didn't matter. The only milestones I celebrated were ones where my hunts were of their most challenging and most exhilarating. Ones that actually required careful planning and tactical manoeuvres. I didn't have memories of my human life, but I sometimes wondered what I was back then. Perhaps I was a commander in some sort of regiment, or maybe I was just someone who worked on the land and hunted for food. Who knows? What I do know is that I was and will always be the most superior hunter in the world, even better than that idiot Demetri. Well what else could they do? The Volturi had to settle for second best when I denied them my services. I hate working for anyone, being ordered around like some lackey, having always preferred to hunt alone.

I changed my track, the sight and sound of the water drawing me in as I crossed Victoria's familiar scent. I was leaving them for a moment, but I would be back soon enough. I needed to check on where she was and if she was tracking the others. I needed to make plans if this hunt here turned up empty. I only wished that I could split myself in two. Victoria was totally incapable of tracking, or anything much else for that matter.

As I ran, I continued to think about the past. There was only one other time I had this much fun. Well, it was fun right up to the moment I was denied the girl that had the most haunting scent that I had ever come across. My mind wandered back to that time and I smiled. So much had come about at that time that had changed my destiny. I had found a mate in Victoria after years wandering this planet on my own, but I now questioned whether or not being with her was right for me. Then I growled, realising that on that very same day I had been thwarted by some stupid old vampire who changed my quarry before I could get to her. Of course, I DID get to kill him in revenge, so all was not lost. And when I saw her in that meadow, surprised that I recognised anyone among the filthy animal feeders, I knew that I had seen her before, my recollections of the past triggering who she was.

"So THAT'S where I've smelt her before! Well....what a small world! What WAS her first name? Something.....Alice....that's it! Mary Alice! Well, now isn't that INTERESTING!" I hissed to myself as I ran, hearing Victoria come into range as I tried to keep my voice down.

"What did you say James?" she asked, honing in on my self-conversation.

"Oh, nothing," I said as I smiled evilly. No sense in letting the stupid little child of a vampire out of the bag now. Besides, I had kept it from her all this time because of the humiliation I felt over losing her....why would I keep it a secret all that time to only reveal it now? It wasn't as if it was the only secret I'd ever kept from Victoria. "Give me your position," I said, keeping my voice to a near whisper.

"I'm tracking the truck along the road beyond the river. Her scent is everywhere but it's faint, so I'm hanging back. I don't think she's in the truck James. I don't want to get too close in case they hear me," she replied, her voice beginning to fade.

"I need to speak with you. Stop for a minute and I'll catch up," I said as the sound of the truck faded in the distance, Bella's scent not strong enough to convince me that she was there either.

I realised that I've never been able to work Victoria out. "All this dodging and weaving, feinting and running. Why doesn't she just attack the stupid vampires and get it over with?" I mouthed impatiently under my breath. Lately Victoria had begun to bore and irritate me, her lack of hunting prowess frustrating me when she came with me on the hunt. Victoria had served her purpose decades ago, and though she was undoubtedly beautiful, I knew I needed freedom again once this was over. She was nothing but a dead weight, a hindrance rather than a help, and I had grown tired of her. This mating thing had its advantages, but who was I kidding? I still took humans any way I wanted before I killed them, satisfying my every desire in the process as I stole their virtues as well as their lives. I would just end things once Victoria had outworn her usefulness here, and continue to use the humans to satiate my lust.

Then, there was Laurent. Since Laurent had joined us, I felt thoroughly crowded out by the two of them. I liked the idea of being in charge of other inferior vampires, but hated the company that I had to keep because of it. At least the useless, wimpy Frenchman had gone, though I knew why he hung around me all those years. His weak nature would always make him a follower and he would forever cower to the strength of others. If I ever laid eyes on him again, he would be done for. I had shown him nothing but civility and he turns on ME and helps this damned coven? What a wimp. What a traitor! Victoria had a soft spot for him, and always manipulated him to do her bidding. At least SHE had a few leadership skills, though they weren't anywhere near as strong as mine.

This challenge came along at just the right time, injecting some life back into my bored and restless existence, giving me the opportunity to change my life back to how I liked it best. I licked my lips as I ran, the exhilaration I felt higher than I could ever imagine! My mind went into overdrive as I thought about Bella and what I would like to do to her, devising a thousand ways to torture and kill her. Then I smirked as I realised that Bella was just the tip of the iceberg! Once I had finished with her, I would perhaps pay a visit to that child and reminisce about old times! I shuddered, the thrill of all of this too much to withstand. To make things even MORE interesting, I decided that maybe after this was over, I wouldn't kill Edward. Why should I let him get off that easily? Leaving him to mourn the death of that insignificant little human pet of his would be far more satisfying. Then that filthy animal feeder would know what it felt like to lose everything, just as I had when I lost Alice. This was going to be a great day, and I was determined to make the last moments of her life haunt him forever. I would certainly have to make sure that he somehow witnessed her demise. "Hmmm...maybe I should make them hunt me!" I mumbled, rather excited about my idea. Not only would they think they were winning, but if I did it alone, the victory would be mind-blowing! I chuckled and realised that doing it alone would also mean that I would have a good reason to be rid of the painful Victoria. I spotted her dead ahead and slowed to a stop to meet her.

I realised that we were out of range and could speak, the sounds of the crickets and nocturnal animals, along with the rushing water of the nearby river the only noises within earshot. "They're just leading us into a trap, and I'm pretty sure that Bella's not with them," I muttered in the lowest voice possible, frustrated by the fact that she was missing. "If this hunt doesn't go well I may just have to look up some of Bella's family," I added, thinking further about what to do next. I knew about tactics. I had to if I wanted to be the most accomplished hunter in existence. I knew that I had to cover all possibilities. I also realised that Bella may have other family, and using them as bait might just do the trick! This backup plan was the best solution, but I knew that I still wanted to have some fun with the stuffy Carlisle and his followers in any case. I just couldn't help myself. Besides, there was still a slim chance that Bella was with them.

"So, what do you want me to do?" she asked, raising her brow in question, watching me with a confused expression as I contemplated my next move. I knew that I still needed Victoria's help. I would also need to keep them away from Victoria so that she could be my little errand girl back in town.

I looked at her questioning face, her confusion just confirming to me how stupid she really was. "Go back to Forks, find the school and see if you can find out if Bella has any family outside of her father just in case. Then, go to Seattle airport and check if her scent is there in case she's running, and then call by her house if her scent isn't at the airport. You have an hour, got it?" I whispered as I handed her a phone. She opened her mouth to question me but I placed my hand over her mouth before she had the chance. "You will need to stay behind and keep watch on the coven. Remember though, if you see Bella, she's mine!" I reminded her, putting her in her rightful place.

She stood there unmoving. I sighed in frustration and added, "For Christ sake Victoria! Move before the damn sun rises!" I snarled, restraining my voice, trying to stop myself from tearing her apart then and there. I was more than looking forward to being rid of this irritant, this gum stuck on the bottom of my shoe.

She huffed and went to turn and leave, when she said finally, wistfully, "I love you, James."

"Yeh, well we have no time for that now. I'll call you when I can get clear of them. Probably won't be for some hours, as I plan to have fun with them for a while. Now go," I said offhandedly, shooing her away with a raised hand.

She stared at me with hurt and suspicion in her eyes. I didn't care. Now I would be rid of her for a while at least, and what a great excuse to leave her behind! I loved how my hunts made life easier! And if they cornered and killed Victoria after she had done her job? So what! She left me there and headed towards town, and I continued to run north, heading towards the idiots, muttering under my breath, "We'll see who the superior hunter is NOW Edward!"

I ran a little further north in a large loop to keep my distance, then stopped and got my bearings, closing my eyes and inhaling deeper as the feather-light breeze touched my skin. This was the part I loved more than any other....tuning into the tenor of my prey and trying to work out what they may do next, the distraction a welcome relief. Bella's scent cross-crossed through this place, the strength of it coming and going with the gentle breeze, and I loved it! After all, I didn't just want to pick off my prey without some sort of challenge. Where would be the fun in that?

I inhaled once again, the scent weakening as I ran north, its lack of consistency beginning to frustrate me. I tried to keep a cool head, not wanting to give away my position to the others before the right time, and trying with everything I could to muster patience. I was annoyed that as a vampire I did not change, forever frozen in time, forever making the same mistakes, forever having to put up with the same character flaws that I had possessed since day one. I was slowly beginning to lose my very limited patience with myself as well as this situation. I knew I had to change the course of things.

I heard the Jeep's engine rev loudly this time, directly northwest from where I was, challenging me to pursue. Thoroughly tempted, I ran in pursuit of their Jeep, but as my suspicion grew, I slowed and so so did they. What did they think they were doing? Surely they feared me enough to run....surely they did not want to have me follow them? I just loved this game of cat and mouse. I lived for it. Though I lacked patience, I had an abundance of wiles and thought it hilarious that they felt they could get the better of me! Idiots! They were such pushovers! I knew where I would lead them now, and it was probably the same place they wanted me anyway, my senses knowing it, feeling it.

Then as the breeze caught my nostrils, directly coming in from the north, Edward's scent hit me with strength, like a slap in the face in its overpowering arrogance. Well, now that was interesting! I knew he had left the Jeep he drove, and was now on foot, leaving himself vulnerable to my attack. It also appeared that less likely that Bella may have gone with him, as something was off. Her scent was not as strong and was intermittent. Edward's was true and fresh and headed in one direction, north of here, heading towards the Canadian border. Bella's scent was stronger and more consistent back where Victoria was. I smiled and shook my head. These idiots were trying to outwit ME? They had NO chance! I was more than pleased that things were going this well. As I ran with speed and stealth, my thoughts then turned turned to my delicious victim....

EPOV

_Do you have your little human with you Edward? Hmmm...I can taste her scent on my tongue and it's SO delicious! I can't wait to break every bone in her body before I kill her! Might even do more than that. I can think of lots of ways to have this one. I'm sure Edward would LOVE that! Perhaps I should break her spirit first, and then her body before I drain her slowly.....ahh....yesssss! I can just taste her sweet blood now! What a bunch of idiots! I can't believe they didn't change her! He's left her so vulnerable that it's nearly an insult to my intelligence! This is going to be way too easy!!_

My teeth clenched and my body nearly went into spasm as I heard his vile thoughts, running a little slower than I liked to ensure that he followed, wanting more than anything to turn on my heels and attack. I continued to run, pushing the anger away. I knew I had to keep a clear head now more than ever and I had decided to alight from the Jeep as I did not want him circling back and pursuing Bella, Alice and Jasper. I hoped that they had gotten out, but had to be certain. I wondered that if it came to a fight, whether or not I could win. I was thankful that I could outrun him. At least that would ensure that I could avoid a fight until I was thoroughly prepared for it, drawing him further and further away from his prime target.

_Hmmm...HER scent is fading. Where is she? Well, well finding her is proving more difficult than I first thought. Now that's interesting...._

I roared in response to his thoughts. I was frustrated that he had figured out that Bella was probably not with me, and more than concerned that perhaps he felt she was not here at all. I headed towards the clearing that we had planned to attack him from, but his thoughts made me doubt that he would follow. We needed to end this, and end this now. Of course, I was not going to get my wish. Instead he backed away and looped around us, increasing his distance once again, yet again seemingly one step ahead of us, but not before I picked up his thoughts again.

_Well Edward, you seem to be getting annoyed with me! That's just great..... _

His thoughts faded one last time but at least my angry response had drawn him in. Hours ensued, his avoidance of us beginning to frustrate me. I had watched the night turn into day and then night again, the whole while pining for my love. The hunt continued, and he kept his distance, encircling us as he ran, the cat and mouse game continuing with fervour. I ran west, then looped around, continuing my journey north again, having left the Jeep miles back with Emmett driving, and Carlisle running behind me, both of them trying to corral the hunter, while at the same time keeping him interested by making a noise here and there, attracting him like a moth to a flame. We travelled separately, running in a zigzag motion, keeping within distance of each other while not making ourselves vulnerable, yet he always seemed to pick up on our moves. Our scents had now been isolated by the tracker, I realised, Bella's having disappeared miles back. He knew she wasn't with us, yet continued on his path. I wondered if he craved a fight just as much as I did? I approached the edge of the forest which abutted the trail that Emmett was following in the Jeep and darted back in, not wanting to leave myself out in the open, as his thoughts came in a whisper after hours of silence, and I realised that he had finally tired of this particular hunt.

_This game is beginning to bore me... and she's not here so....._

His thoughts faded once again, however this time I feared that I was going to lose him unless I took drastic action. A thunderous growl escaped my lips as I realised that this hunter had outwitted us and was leaving. I needed to provoke him now, draw him close so that Emmett and Carlisle could follow behind him and trap the hunter, turning him into the hunted once and for all.

JPOV

I heard him growl. They were still in the area, and I was more convinced than ever that Bella wasn't with them, but stopped to once again inhale the scents around me and listen for their approach. Every scent of the animal feeders was there, and Bella's was completely gone now. How boring! I pondered my next move calmly. I decided then and there that I would not follow them further, sensing their trap way back when I had crossed the border into Canada. No use in risking getting torn apart before I have my fun. The plan that I had been formulating in my mind was looking more and more appealing by the minute. I would head to the airport here and fly back to that poor excuse of a town, start from there and work my way out. I daren't run, in case I bumped into my little friends. I climbed the closest tree and took in the view, the idiots once again trying to draw me in. The Jeep was to the south, approaching slowly on the rocky trail that wound through this place, and then I heard Edward's voice from the north. I sensed that the leader was somewhere between them, west of here.

"Come on James. Let us get this over with. Just you and me!" Edward boomed from the top of the mountain ahead. "You know you want to, and I won't involve the others," he added temptingly.

I roared in response, the noise causing the leaves surrounding me to tremble.

"What sort of hunter are you anyway? You don't even know where Bella is, do you?" he added mockingly, my fists clenching in anger as I grasped a thick branch above my head and tore it away from the tree, throwing it crashing across the canopy. I knew what he was doing. He was trying to provoke me into a fight, and I wasn't about to fall for it. It didn't stop me from being angry though, my arrogance always getting in the way in situations like this.

He laughed loudly in response to my fit of rage. I had to use every bit of my will to stop myself from running north and attacking him, my ego threatening to get me in a whole world of trouble. Finally, I could no longer hold my tongue.

"You think that I'm THAT stupid Eddie my boy? You have NO idea who you're dealing with!" I bellowed through clenched teeth, my voice reverberating from the top of the mountain and returning to me with force.

"Yes I do actually. You are nothing but an animal. You think that you know it all? You KNOW NOTHING of what we have built here and I will NOT stand by and have you take it all away!" he said with a hint of desperation and an abundance of rage.

"Well there's one thing I DO know. By the time I'm finished with your Bella, you will have nothing left to live for EDWARD!" I hissed in reply, laughing evilly after I spoke.

And then I heard him roar the loudest of all throughout our exchange, unable to contain his anger as I heard him suddenly running. I knew one thing. This boy was quick. I couldn't help but have one last word though. "The truth hurts doesn't it EDDIE?" I snarled as I leapt a hundred yards or so from the tree and landed with a thud, taking off and running as I laughed once again.....the elation coursing through me so much that I ran even faster than usual. _Oh well, I guess it's to the airport and back to the stupid little town again._

EPOV

James was headed towards the airport and back to Forks. Even though I was relieved that he had failed to follow Bella, this was not good. I was concerned that innocent lives could be lost, and I would not be surprised if he used Charlie to get to Bella. Esme and Rosalie would be no match for James and Victoria.

I was so distracted that I failed to notice Carlisle and Emmett's presence as they had begun to close in on my position. "Stop, Edward!" Carlisle yelled from a distance as I spotted the truck pulled over to my left, leaving it in my wake. I was not going to stop. He had to be killed before he hurt Bella's family. "We're not in position Edward!" he justified further, taking off after me.

"I don't CARE!" I hissed impatiently as I increased my pace and drew away from him. Suddenly, Emmett came from nowhere and tackled me, sending me crashing to the forest floor. He had me pinned to the ground in an instant, his strength giving me no hope of escape. "Let me go Emmett!" I roared, struggling against his hold. I could not believe he had surprised me, my thoughts of rage so trained on James that I had not noticed what Emmett had planned to do.

"Now Edward, do you think you'd be doing Bella any favours by getting yourself killed?" he said calmly. He was usually the first one who wanted to fight. "You know we can't keep up with you and that we can't fight him unless we're all in there and in a position to ambush him. I'm not letting you go," he insisted, gripping me tighter.

"You're letting him get away!" I hissed.

"Live to fight another day Edward, for all our sakes. Please?" asked Carlisle as he approached us.

I struggled further, but was getting nowhere. "Aww, come on Edward. Stop it and I'll let you up," Emmett said, his eyes challenging me and begging me at the same time.

"FINE!" I screamed as I stilled my body. "He's gone anyway!" I said, hearing nothing of James' thoughts, as Emmett finally backed away from me and removed himself, but continued to grasp my arm as we both stood to our feet. I stared at the both of them with ire, my angry eyes fixed on the both of them. "Do you have any idea what you've done?" I howled as I attempted to shrug out of Emmett's grasp. _Don't try to run Edward! _"He knows we don't have Bella and he's headed back to town. He's gone!" I screamed at Emmett.

"I'm sorry man," he said apologetically, releasing my arm. "But it was suicide attacking him without us, you know that."

I nodded, reluctantly agreeing with him as Carlisle pulled out his phone....

JPOV

I was disappointed that I had not found Bella yet, but I knew that I could go back to Forks and at the very least use her family as leverage to draw her back from wherever they had her stashed. Stupid Victoria. Bella's probably sitting in her living room right now waiting for me like some sort of gift.

I arrived at the airport with little time to spare, the next available flight to Seattle leaving in thirty minutes.

EPOV

"Where's the woman, Esme?" Carlisle asked.

"We don't know. We're outside Charlie's house and her scent is strong, but he's safe. Charlie's just arrived home from work now so we'll continue keep watch. We tracked her scent before arriving here, and she's also been to the school, into town and to the airport," Esme replied, panic in her voice and then asked, "Where is James?"

"We've lost him. He's gone to the airport and we think he's headed back to Forks, so be on your guard," Carlisle replied with regret. "We'll be there as soon as we can. You stay and take care of Charlie and we'll head to the airport and see if we can intercept him," he added.

"What about Phoenix?" she asked.

"Once we get James out of the picture, we will fly out there. We have to go," he said as he hung up the phone and dialled Alice's number.

I sighed heavily, on one hand relieved that I would get to speak to Bella, but on the other hand, angry and petrified as to what Alice may have seen in her visions. I had, after all, failed in my mission.

"Alice?" he asked anxiously as we approached the Jeep and got in, Emmett starting the engine and gunning it towards the trail.

"Carlisle," she breathed.

"Are you in Phoenix and is Bella safe?"

"Yes," she answered, relief in her voice.

I watched the conversation that I knew they had to have, but my patience was wearing thin as I ached to hear the sound of Bella's voice.

"Listen Alice. We've lost James. We tried to lead him north and ambush him, but instead we've spent the entire night chasing him and being pursued. James is nowhere to be found now. Have you had any visions?"

"I just saw him," she answered. "I saw a room with mirrors and a wooden floor, and he's there waiting. There's a gold stripe across the mirrors, but something's missing. A decision still needs to be made," she added vaguely. "He'll be in the mirror room today, or maybe tomorrow. Whatever made him get on that plane....it was leading him to this mirrored room."

I stared at Carlisle pleadingly, silently begging him to give me the phone. "Alice, is Bella near? Please put her on the phone," he requested, causing me to sigh with untold relief.

"Yes," she replied. "Bella?"

In a blur, the phone was in my hand. I waited for Bella to come to the phone, my breathing shallow as I waited for what seemed to be eons. Of course, it was only two seconds before I heard the muffled noises of the phone being handed to my love.

"Hello?" she breathed, her voice washing through me, filling me to the brim. I closed my eyes and smiled, exhaling loudly, being swept away as her voice rang within me, seizing my heart. I knew that I had no privacy, but at least I could fantasise that there was no-one else here except Bella and I.

"Bella," I replied, elated.

"Oh, Edward! I was so worried!" she said, her voice beautiful as I imagined her in my arms, her statement causing me to sigh, the frustration mixed with a burning, unquenchable longing for her.

"Bella. I told you not to worry about anything but yourself," I scolded gently, my smile lessening but not disappearing completely, my imagination running rife as her face once again appeared in my minds eye.

"Where are you?" she murmured, her voice liquid ambrosia, every word spoken permeating my body, the need and want for her making me feel as though I would explode.

"We're outside of Vancouver. Bella, I'm sorry – we lost him. He seems suspicious of us – he's careful to stay just far enough away that I can't hear what he's thinking," I said, omitting the fact that I had heard some of his thoughts, but they were too vile and distressing to reveal them to Bella. "But he's gone now – it looks like he got on a plane. We think he's heading back to Forks to start over," I said as I heard Alice filling Jasper in on what Carlisle had told her.

"I know. Alice saw that he got away," she answered, a worried tone in her voice.

"You don't have to worry, though," I assured her. "He won't find anything to lead him to you. You just have to stay there and wait till we find them again."

"I'll be fine. Is Esme with Charlie?" she asked, once again thinking of others before herself. Ah, my beautiful, selfless Bella!

"Yes – the female has been in town. She went to the house, but while Charlie was at work. She hasn't gone near him, so don't be afraid. He's safe with Esme and Rosalie watching."

"What is she doing?" she asked. What indeed.

"Probably trying to pick up the trail. She's been all through the town during the night. Rosalie traced her through the airport, all the roads around town, the school...she's digging, Bella, but there's nothing to find," I said, hoping that I was correct.

"And you're sure Charlie's safe?" she asked, seeking assurance.

"Yes, Esme won't let him out of her sight. And we'll be there soon. If the tracker gets anywhere near Forks, we'll have him."

"I miss you," she whispered, her voice calling to me, begging me to go to her. My body shuddered in response, my stomach blazing, my need for her palpable.

My eyes shut tighter, and my face tightened with the stress of being apart from her. "I know, Bella. Believe me, I know. It's like you've taken half of myself away with you," I murmured, my breathing increasing rapidly as I saw her face in my mind once again, the bittersweet torture enveloping me as she spoke further.

"Come and get it, then," she challenged, the burning within me threatening to take over everything.

I swallowed thickly, the hurt and pain of being without her too much to take. "Soon, as soon as I possibly can. I WILL make you safe first," I said with determination.

"I love you," she said, reminding me again why I was being tortured so. How could she love me after all the hell I had put her and her family through? And yet, here she was, still professing her undying love to me, her voice unwavering, determined.

"Could you believe that, despite everything I've put you through, I love you, too?" I asked, wondering how she could think that I loved her after all that had happened. There was so much more I wanted to say to her, but that would have to wait, for it was not for others' prying ears. I wanted to tell her that I needed her soft lips on mine, that I ached for her searing touch and that I craved her body, mind and soul and wanted nothing more than for every inch of her skin to be on mine.

"Yes I can, actually," she replied automatically. She was an incredible person, constantly surprising me with her warmth, acceptance and forgiveness. I did not deserve her. Not now, and not ever. I also knew she wanted to say so much more, but was also being listened to.

"I'll come for you soon," I promised as Carlisle signalled for me to hang up. _We have to focus Edward._

"I'll be waiting," she breathed as I hung up the phone, not wanting to say goodbye. That word was far too final. We drove on.....

JPOV

The phone in my pocket buzzed. I pulled it out and checked it as I stood at the end of the line at the ticket counter, rolling my eyes as I pressed the send button. "It's me," Victoria whispered, stating the obvious. "I'm in the forest to the north of the girl's house and I just heard that they're heading to the airport," she hissed. "But they also mentioned Phoenix as well, so I think Bella could be hidden there."

"Interesting!" I said to myself. "Did you get a name and address?" I asked.

"Yes," she whispered, giving me the details of the name and address of Bella's mother, her only other relative besides the father, who happened to live in Phoenix. Without saying goodbye, I hung up on her and switched the phone off, relieved that I'd never have to listen to her whining EVER again, as I knew what I would have to do now. I didn't care much for the desert, the sunshine. It only hindered my hunting abilities. "Oh well, I'll just have to make do," I muttered to myself, smiling at the prospect of closing in on my prey.

"One way ticket to Phoenix, Arizona please," I said with courtesy, smiling at the pretty girl behind the counter.

"Um, your passport sir?" she asked distractedly as I reached into my jacket pocket and handed it to her, her face confused by the fact that I had not officially entered the country as she looked over my passport.

Before she could question me, I leant over the counter and smiled at her, breathing my hypnotic breath over her face, causing her to become completely distracted. "You know, you have the prettiest eyes," I said, openly flirting with her to get what I wanted. "They remind me of the green in the forest where I come from," I added, waggling my eyebrows at her. "It's such a shame that I have to fly out of here now, Sarah," I said as I stared at her name tag, sighing in an over-exaggerated way. Being human, of course she lapped up my attention.

"I-I....um, thank you...." she said, stamping the passport and printing out my boarding pass without taking her eyes off me. She handed the passport and boarding pass back to me without another word, her mouth gaping as my gaze held her. My smile widened. It was all too easy to get what I wanted from these mere mortals.

"Well, Sarah, thank you very much. I will be sure to write a letter to this airline, complimenting you on your excellent customer service," I said as I winked at her and turned away from the counter, listening as her heart thudded out of her chest. I still had it. I oozed charm. When it got me what I wanted, anyway. I was most pleased that I didn't have to create a scene to get on my flight out of here, immediately leaving her panting behind me as I headed for the gate, and towards the most exciting fate of my existence.

EPOV

Carlisle pulled the phone out to check the time. It was 2am. Another day had passed since I had spoken to Bella. We had of course missed the elusive James and had caught a flight from Vancouver to Seattle, but I was more than relieved that I was one step closer to finishing this and being reunited with the love of my existence. As we landed, I stared out the window of the plane, the lights of the city welcoming me home like a beacon in a stormy sea.

We alighted from the plane at a pace just within the realms of being human, and made our way through customs, Emmett having to, for the second time in as many hours, use his hypnotic ways on the female airport staff to get us to our destination as quickly and as easily as possible. My only wish was that I could leave this place and jump straight across the peninsula to Forks.

As we left the woman behind the counter standing there, gasping, the phone suddenly buzzed in Carlisle's hand as we headed out of the terminal and towards the car lot. Emmett's eyes were scanning the area for a car that we might like to procure to make a hasty escape from the city. "Alice?" he answered, my body tensing. "Put Edward on the phone," she said far too quickly. This could not be good. I was immediately there, phone in hand, as she began to speak.

"Here's a nice Mercedes, Carlisle," Emmett said as I placed my hand on his shoulder to stop him from breaking into the vehicle, trying to decipher Alice's mutterings.

"Edward, something's changed. I've seen a vision of a room with a VCR and TV and James. Bella just told me it's her mother's house." she said, her voice quick and low, no doubt to keep Bella from panicking.

"I-I don't understand," I stammered, waves of shock running through my body as I tried to comprehend what she was saying.

"The mirrored room where he's waiting! Edward, Bella told me that it looked like a place she used to do dance lessons at. She assured me that it could have been any place, so I really didn't think much more of it. But, now...he's on his way to her mother's house here Edward, so you'd better get here as quickly as you can!" she said, the rapidity of her voice and the words she spoke sending me reeling as the pain swept through my body, relentless in its path, causing me to nearly crush the phone in my hand.

Having heard the entire conversation and realising that I was frozen with shock, Carlisle took the phone from me and said, "Alice. We will catch the first flight we can out of here. We will meet you at the airport and take Bella somewhere safe until he's caught." He pressed the end button and stared at me with sympathetic eyes. _We have to move, Edward._

"Come on man," Emmett said as he grasped my arm, the shock having caused me to stand there, motionless and unable to move a muscle. He dragged me into the terminal, and when my faculties returned somewhat, I pushed past them both and near blurred to the ticketing counter. _Edward!_

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I waited impatiently at the counter for Carlisle and Emmett to arrive at a more human pace. People milled about the terminal, and the only person that had noticed my speedy approach was the lone young woman who stood behind the counter, her gaping mouth showing me that she knew I was anything but human. _Wow, he's fast. And....gorgeous!_

I was relieved of the behaviour of humans. So many odd occurrences were simply brushed aside in favour of their own selfish desires.

"Can we have three one way tickets on the next flight to Phoenix, beautiful?" Emmett asked, using his charm once again, waggling his eyebrows at her. If I was not so distraught, I would be amused by his behaviour. I did not care about anything other than getting on an immediate flight to Phoenix. She smiled at him nervously, blushing at the onslaught that was Emmett. _Hmmm...he's hunky. He looks like my boyfriend.... and the blonde....WOW! I've hit the jackpot!_

"Can you tell me what time the next flight is?" Carlisle asked softly as he handed her his credit card.

"I don't have another until 11am," she said as she tapped the keys, her thoughts unashamed. _If you have the time, I have the place, you gorgeous hunk of a man! Maybe I need to delay them a little...offer them a seat in the first class bar or something...I'm on a break soon. Boy what I wouldn't give to have that blonde one!_

I nudged Carlisle, knowing that she could perhaps help a little more than she was, her selfish desires getting in the way of my need get to Phoenix as soon as possible. "You see, I am a Doctor and have to meet with a patient in Phoenix as quickly as possible," he added, lifting his medical bag up and touching it gently, his voice smooth as honey as he tried to charm the girl into doing him favours. She tapped the keys further and smiled. _Oh well, there goes another opportunity...._

"Yes. It departs at 6.15am with an arrival of 9.45am, but I only have first class seats available," she said, her voice showing mock sympathy. "And you will need to check that bag in," she added.

"Of course, we will take them," he said, smiling at her in thanks and handing her the bag. _Well a rich Doctor! My friends are NOT going to believe this! What a shame I have a boyfriend...._

I growled with impatience when I realised that we still had an hour to wait, and Carlisle placed an assuring hand on my shoulder as the woman behind the counter stared at me fearfully, her hands shaking as she handed Carlisle our boarding passes. "Gate ten. Have-have a good flight sir," she stammered nervously. _That guy sure is weird!_

"Thank you," he replied with calm as we turned and headed for the signs directing us to our destination. As we headed towards the gate and sat down for our hour long wait to board, Carlisle said, "It will be fine, Edward. Alice has not seen any harm come to Bella, so don't fear." I nodded once, but my tensed muscles revealed to both of them that I did not feel comforted by his words.

I sat there in silence, trying to keep up my human facade as best I could, but the pain...was unbearable. Realising that I needed space, Carlisle stood and stared at Emmett. "Let us go to the newsstand and buy something to read on the flight, Emmett," Carlisle said, grabbing Emmett and leading him away.

As alone as I possibly could be, I leant forward and placed my hands on my head, gripping my hair and threatening to tear it out by the roots. "Bella," I whispered. "I'm sorry!" I began to rock, the pain in my chest taking over everything. My body ached to expel the tears that my immortality prevented and I longed to be human now more than ever.

I did not know how long I was in the same position, before voices began to invade my mind, the stares and whispers directed towards me forcing me to stop what I was doing. I sat back in my seat and stared towards the wall, trying appear human, while at the same time trying to block out everything but thoughts of Bella. Finally the first call came to board the flight, bringing me out of my bubble of pain and standing to my feet.

Carlisle and Emmett were there in seconds, having already begun to head back from the newsstand. He took the phone from his pocket and dialled. "We're boarding the plane but it won't be taking off for another 45 minutes. Our arrival time is 9.45am, and I suggest you relocate to near Bella's mother, just in case," he said.

"Yes, we will. Jasper's already downstairs checking out, so we're arranging to move now," she replied, her voice rapid, Bella no doubt right next to her, the very thought of her making my heart yearn for her again. Carlisle walked away from us and Alice spoke further, though I found it difficult to make out what she said as the second announcement came over the loudspeaker for passengers to board the flight. I was too caught up in my own selfish emotions to care.

"We will be there as soon as we can," he said as he hung up, his eyes showing concern as we walked over to board the plane. _Alice has seen James, but things are not clear as to why he's in that room. Alice feels that there is still another decision to be made, Edward, and we will hopefully arrive in Phoenix before anything changes further. _I nodded at him in silence, my heart feeling as though it had been torn to shreds.

I pushed past the flight attendant and sat next to the window in first class, and heard Carlisle apologise to her as he followed. I sat in my seat agitated, and stared out the window with impatience. I was pleased that we were the only passengers in first class, but more than anything I craved to be in alone so that I could be with my own thoughts. Anger began to grow wild within me as every muscle in my body tensed, threatening to burst forth within the confines of the plane as I realised that James could already be there, hunting Bella down.

"Calm down, Edward. It's not going to make the plane go faster, man," Emmett said in his usual upbeat manner. I scowled at him silently, conveying in no uncertain terms my contempt toward his comment.

"Edward, son, all will be well. You will be with Bella in no time," Carlisle said softly.

I stared at the man who was the closest thing that I had to a father and whispered in desperation, "I can't lose her Carlisle. I'd rather be dead than to live another moment without her."

"Don't talk like that Edward, please," he begged, hurt crossing his normally tranquil face. Not only was I talking about my own demise, but I was also thinking about how to achieve it now. I had to. Fate was forcing my hand. I had no choice in the matter.

"And why shouldn't I?" I seethed. "Could you live without Esme?" I said, causing Carlisle to flinch in an uncharacteristically human way. _I would be devastated if I lost Esme, of course. But I would find a way to carry on, somehow. _Carlisle's thoughts of course conflicted with mine on the matter, his drive to preserve life no matter what shell it was contained in overriding the feelings or circumstances of the people involved.

Then I stared at Emmett to continue my tirade, "And Emmett, what would you do if Rosalie was murdered? Would you HONESTLY want to live another moment without her?" _I'd want to die, Edward. But don't expect me to help you along those lines, man._

"Calm down, bro. Nothing's gonna happen to Bella!" Emmett answered, somewhat irritated by my thoughts, his own agreeing with my sentiments, though I was annoyed that he would not assist me if I asked. And, of course, neither would Carlisle.

"You don't know that. NONE of us do!" I said as I crossed my arms, trying to hold myself together, and turned to stare out the window once again as the plane finally began to move and taxi down the runway. I breathed a sigh of relief, while trying to contain my pent up anger at the same time, and focused on what had to be done next. I knew one thing. If Bella did not survive this, I could not ask my family to kill me. I knew they cared for me too much to do it. I would have to request it from another, and as much as it irked me to think it, I knew one coven that would assist. The Volturi. All I would have to do was provoke them somehow, break their rules and that would be it. Then Carlisle and the others could live the rest of their existences without feeling the guilt of having destroyed me. The plane took off and we soared towards our waiting destiny, and I hoped, towards Bella's waiting arms.....

**A/N: Review please! This chapter took ages (and I kept changing my mind) so I need you to let me know how I did. Please? XXXX Love ya!**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Well, this chapter is the ONE! The fight chapter between Edward and James! I hope you like it. ****Jennifer: Thank you for being you!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any Stephenie Meyer franchises. But I love to write the naughty James! MWAHAHAHAH (she laughs evilly as she wrings her hands together with glee!)**

EPOV

I stared out the window of the plane once again and pondered in silence. The sun had risen, the skyline hued from pink to violet and blurring into the horizon, a new day dawning as we flew towards Phoenix and to the horror that awaited us. The place that was to be the setting for this final conflict was quite apt when I thought about it. I wondered whether after this day had ended, Bella and I would somehow rise from the ashes as did the mythical phoenix, reborn, fresh and new. One could only dare to dream.

I was fighting the good fight, I realised, and though I knew that, it did not mean that I would win. Life was not that fair, nor that easy, especially for the likes of me. I could no longer predict what would remain after this battle, no matter what version of the future Alice saw. I did not know whether or not I would have to run with Bella for the rest of eternity, eking out a new existence with her and taking her away from the only life she knew. After all, what sort of future could I offer her? I wondered whether or not she could find it in her heart to ever forgive me if that particular scenario came into play. If James survived and we ran, she would have no choice but to resent and despise me for what I had deprived her of, what I had torn her away from. What I had forced her to relinquish through no fault of her own. How could she not grow to hate me for that? I had managed to take EVERYTHING away from her, her life now appearing as desolate as this place, with no promise of a brighter future.

Of course, I only needed one thing of my old life to carry on with mine...Bella Swan. How convenient for me! She required much, much more to survive in the future. More than I could ever hope to give her. She needed her family, her friends and her home. She deserved an education, a career, marriage and children. She had the right to feel safe and live a normal, happy life. By being a mere presence and involving myself in her world, I had managed to slowly but surely deprive her of her humanity, piece by agonising piece.

I groaned, frustrated with the situation as it stood, my selfishness the cause of everything that had gone wrong thus far. Then again, I realised, it mattered not what I had deprived Bella of up until now, or what she would sacrifice in the future. Not if she was killed today. And if that was the outcome, I would follow closely behind. I would make sure of it as certain as night turns into day.

I knew that now more than ever I needed to push beyond this and hold onto some semblance of the life that I had before this whole mess began. I owed her that. How ironic. Up until recently, I had never had anything worth preserving, anything worth protecting. Anyone worth loving. And now, I stood to lose everything that I held dear. My love, my life. My only reason to exist.

I continued to stare blankly through the window, bereft of any words to express the feelings of rage, emptiness and frustration that whirled through me as I gazed at the arid land below. Bella's description of this land did not lend it justice, its vastness needed to be seen to be believed, its varying shades of violet caused by the rising sun reminding me of one thing. A burning vampire. I hoped that I would get to see James burn in this place, this dry lifeless desert befittingly becoming his altar of sacrifice.

_Er, Edward. Stop being such a sad sack would ya? You're bringing me down!_

"Sorry Emmett," I replied, not taking my eyes off the scenery below, his thoughts attempting to bring me out of my darkness. He had a way of doing that, my brother. More often than I cared to remember. And though we were not technically brothers, I saw him as one nonetheless, his sunny disposition a necessary part of my life, giving my existence balance that it so desperately needed. I sighed heavily, wanting nothing more than to jump from this plane, my fists clenched as I felt helpless to do anything but wallow, and...wait.

"I will call Esme as soon as we land, and let her know of our change in plans," Carlisle said thoughtfully. _I hope she's safe._

I turned away from the window and stared at Carlisle with sympathy. "Can you not understand my situation, Carlisle?" I asked, appealing to his human, emotional side.

"I know that we don't agree on the ethical issues on this Edward, but just the same, I do know how much you care about Bella and how devastating it would be for you if you lost her," he whispered, the sound of her name once again making me feel the pain. "Believe it or not, Edward, Bella has become an important part of all our lives," he added reassuringly. Emmett, who sat between the both of us, glared at me challengingly.

_You're still not listening to me, man! Do I have to put you in a headlock and MAKE you cheer up?_

"Alright!" I hissed as I my eyes met with Emmett's in frustration, my mouth trying to force a smile to placate him, causing Carlisle frown at the both of us disapprovingly.

"Yeh, well you'd better hurry up about it then," he warned.

"Fine, Emmett!" I replied.

My wallowing in self-pity would need to stop, I realised, if I wanted to have any chance of ultimately winning this particular battle. I turned and smiled at my lovable brother, this attempt much more convincing, silently thanking him for being, well, him. "That's more like it!" he said as he punched me in the arm, his positive energy always rubbing off on me.

"I'm glad you approve," I replied, rolling my eyes at him.

"You know we don't have anything to worry about," Emmett said with a zealous overconfidence. I read his thoughts and realised that he was correct, to a point.

After all, what did I really have to be concerned about? We had James outnumbered. Laurent was out of the picture, his scent nowhere around the area of Forks, Alice not seeing him in any of her predictions. Victoria had disappeared for the moment, but could not, I surmised, possibly get here in time to have an impact on the outcome of this battle here. Alice had not seen her in Phoenix either. And even if we did happen to fail, I had made several contingency plans, none more important that what I would do if Bella was lost forever. Everything was in place, I realised, and my body began to relax. I smiled once again, widely this time, relief washing through me, all my plans in place for every possible outcome.

In response, Emmett placed me in a headlock and rubbed the top of my head playfully. "Hey, hands off the hair!" I threatened, laughing at my brother as he released his hold. I would miss him if we had to run.

"Let us focus on our plan," Carlisle reminded, just as the Captain's announcement came through the overhead speakers and the fasten seatbelts sign lit up. I ran my fingers nervously through my hair, thinking about what lay ahead and then fastened my seatbelt as the flight attendant passed us, the woman silently checking that we had complied. _My, they are a strange bunch. No food or drink? What a boring flight! _The poor flight attendant that had been assigned to first class had only us to serve, yet we did not eat or drink, her thoughts of boredom causing her to spend most of her time in the other sections of the plane. _Mind you, that burly one's not bad. Not bad at all..._ Her thoughts came to a halt as she disappeared through the curtain to take her seat for the landing. I smirked at Emmett, however he remained none the wiser of the woman, seemingly oblivious to her wanton glances.

"This is your Captain speaking. We will be descending into the sunny city of Phoenix ten minutes earlier than scheduled. On behalf of myself and my crew, I hope you enjoyed your flight."

"Now we're talkin!" Emmett said as he clapped his hands together, while I watched the earth rise up to greet us and let out a cleansing breath, relieved that the plane was beginning its slow descent.

"As soon as we land, I track his scent," I said, turning to face them again as I added pointedly, "Alone."

"Bella, Alice and Jasper will be meeting us at the airport, and..."

"Do you honestly think that I'm going to WAIT for him to hunt her if he hasn't already?" I snapped, cutting Carlisle off.

"And do you HONESTLY think we will let you go alone bro?" Emmett threatened, cocking his brow. _It's still suicide without us Edward! _

"Look. I can run faster than any of you. It makes sense for me to go alone, and you can ensure that Bella and her mother are safe and protect them while I dispose of James," I said illogically. Even though I knew that it was a terrible plan, the drive to hunt and kill James overrode every rational thought. Not only did I want to make Bella safe, but I NEEDED my revenge.

"Absolutely not Edward," Carlisle insisted. "We need to ensure that Bella and her mother are safe before we make any rash decisions." His logic was beginning to irritate me, and along with Emmett's insistence on being in the thick of the action, I knew that I was fighting a losing battle.

"It's not as though we're going to a cloudy, forest-filled town like Forks. Where are you going to find a way to run without being noticed?" Emmett questioned as his finger pointed towards the window.

I knew that they were right, yet the logical side of my mind was malfunctioning, taken over by frustration, anger and anxiety. "Alright. We will ensure that they are safe first, then formulate a strategy," I said with a hint of sarcasm, reluctantly agreeing, the plane landing with a jolt as it hit the runway. "But if either Bella or Renee are either dead or kidnapped, I will fight anyone who stands in my way," I warned. I didn't care if half of the human population saw me run through the streets or if the entire vampire population tried to stop me, I would fight with every last breath to kill that monster and exact my revenge.

"Of course," Carlisle agreed, realising that I was willing to do anything to save Bella. _Because if she's dead you will want to be killed...and if you break our laws you know they won't be able to ignore it._

"Something like that," I said, almost casually. "But do not fear Carlisle. I plan on winning this fight and I will not leave James behind to wreak havoc on Bella's family or the rest of you. I will make you all safe, or die trying."

"Will you just accept the fact that no-one's gonna die here Edward?" Emmett challenged, becoming agitated at my thoughts of going out in a blaze of glory. _There's no WAY I'm gonna miss this! _"Well, maybe ONE of our kind will," he added, snickering.

Carlisle cringed at my statement, his careful expression masking the hurt that I knew he felt underneath. _Edward, you are my first son...the one I brought into this world before all the others. Please, don't do this. Because of you...I dared to change the others to create our family. We are a FAMILY Edward, and it's all because of you._

"Carlisle, all will be well," I assured him, knowing in my heart that I would be either reunited with Bella in life, or follow her in death. I would not continue to exist without her. I had finally made peace with myself and my impending destiny, and I was more than relieved, feeling lighter than I had for the last few days. I knew that it would hurt my family, but ultimately I would always choose Bella over any of them, just as they would choose their mates over anyone else. The plane came to an abrupt halt and we unbuckled out seatbelts and stood to make our exit.

We made haste through the terminal, Carlisle taking out his phone and dialling Esme's number as we ran towards the baggage claim area to collect his medical bag.

"Esme!" he cried. "Alice saw him in Phoenix so we have had to fly out there to hunt James," he muttered under his breath.

"Oh Carlisle! Is Bella safe?" she answered, her voice panicked.

"We're on our way to meet them now. Has Victoria shown herself?" he asked, his thoughts begging for Esme to answer in the negative as he collected his bag and we ran towards the exit.

"No, but her scent is still here, so we will continue to watch Charlie," she answered, causing Carlisle to sigh. _I miss you._

"We will call you when we catch him," he said, hanging up the phone before he got too emotional.

"Charlie's still safe, and Victoria is there, but has not attacked the house," Carlisle said with a sense of relief as he put the phone in his pocket. Carlisle was not one to wear his heart on his sleeve, but was presently pining for Esme and wanting to be with her more than anything. I knew how he felt. They were both fortunate that their mates were a little less breakable than mine.

We travelled at near vampire speed towards where I knew they would be waiting. Voices from every mind flooded mine, and I slowly picked through them, searching for Alice's thoughts. Finally, I tuned into them. I heard Alice's mind before I saw her, every word she thought tearing through me and ripping me to pieces. _Edward, Bella's gone! _Without a care for any who saw me, I sped to Alice's side as I caught sight of her.

_Edward! Slow down!_

"Edward, I'm sorry!" she said, her prediction running through her mind as I stopped and watched it unfold. Bella was in a bus, headed away from here. "I-I didn't see...she-she made the decision too quickly..."

"STOP!" I shouted, silencing her. "There's no time for apologies, Alice. Now tell me what happened. How long has she been gone?" I demanded with an eerie calm as Carlisle and Emmett reached us at human speed.

"You just missed her. Maybe ten minutes," Alice replied, her pain filled eyes filled with regret. "We've been searching everywhere for her, but couldn't follow because of the sun...and her scent...disappeared..." she stammered in a panicked voice.

"Let's go!" I said, pulling Alice's arm along with me, the others following close behind.

"Now, is there anything you can tell us further Alice?" Carlisle asked as we dashed through the terminal.

"I saw her mother's house in the vision, and at first he was waiting in the dark, but then it changed. Bella had received a call from her mother, but I couldn't hear what she said. Whatever her mother said made Bella's mood change along with the vision. Jasper felt it straight away," she said, glancing towards Jasper as we walked faster, dodging and weaving through the humans.

"Her emotions went through the roof. At first I thought it was because she was anxious to see you again," Jasper whispered as we walked past the cafeteria. "By the time we reached the airport and went to get Bella breakfast, I had her emotions in check, but it didn't stop her from asking for a human moment, then escaping through another door of the bathroom over there," he said, pointing briefly towards the bathroom beyond the cafeteria, shaking his head in disgust. _All my years of changing and training newborns and THIS HUMAN escapes ME?_

I ignored Jaspers thoughts, focusing on the problem at hand. "Alice?" I asked, prompting her to continue the story, formulating a plan as we nearly blurred through the terminal. I was going to defy Carlisle and run through the streets of Phoenix once I had picked up James' scent. Nothing was going to stop me.

"She seemed distracted, but once Jasper used his gift she appeared better. By the time I saw the vision of her...and..." Alice's voiced trailed off, her vision once again changing as she stopped and stared ahead blankly. Her vision showed Bella speaking on the phone from her mother's house.

"I will go to her mother's," I said as I continued to watch the vision play out.

The vision then flickered and flashed forward to where James was alone in the studio with Bella.

"NO!" I screamed as I saw Bella sprawled on the timber floor, blood everywhere with mirrors smashed around her broken body, which lay there lifeless and unmoving. There was also a burning pyre, with purple smoke billowing from the corner of the room. "This can't happen!" I yelled defiantly, moving to take flight and run through the crowded terminal.

"Edward. You can't run, and you can't fight him alone, so you will need to change your plans. Forget about going to her mother's house alone. We ALL have to go or you will both die," Alice insisted. "Can't you see that?"

"I will not change my plans!" I shouted in defiance, attracting far too much attention from the passersby.

Emmett grabbed me by the arm before I could take off to run. "Not here, Edward. There are too many humans," he whispered, people staring and whispering because of the commotion I was causing.

"Do you think I CARE about that now?" I snarled, trying to break free of his hold.

"Edward. We will do this together. We have to get away from the crowds. Time to procure a car and put an end to this once and for all," Carlisle hissed as we headed through the sliding doors of the terminal and stood outside in the shadows, Bella's scent stopping near a row of parked taxi cabs. James' scent also disappeared from this point, but had diverted away from the cabs. We stood there for a moment, all of us taking in the surrounding scents, thousands of them all intermingled together. It did not matter how many there were. I still detected the irresistible scent of Bella Swan over all of them. I realised that this could be the last time I ever inhaled that smell and drew a deep breath. We remained in the shade of the terminal for a moment, as I considered our next move. We would have to be careful to stay out of direct sunlight. "This way," Carlisle added as we walked quickly but carefully within the shadows of the buildings, and spotted a parking lot to the east of the terminal.

"Her scent ended outside the terminal. We already checked," Alice said shamefully. "We know that James did not take her from here, as she's been travelling alone in my visions. Don't worry, I think that Bella's still alive," she said assuredly. I nodded in acquiescence, the anger still threatening to escape as Emmett continued to grasp my arm. As impossible it was to run without attracting too much unwanted attention, I wanted more than anything to do just that, the urge so powerful that I fought it with every fibre of my being, but the crowded open nature of this place as well as Emmett prevented me from doing what I wanted.

_Keep it cool, Edward. _Jasper had used his gift on me, calming me to a level where I could think rationally.

Then, Alice's eyes widened as she said in frustration, "Now we just need to find out where her mother lives and...Wait! The letter for her mother!" she exclaimed, stopping to reach into her bag, pulling out a sealed envelope. Without asking, I shrugged free of Emmett and snatched the envelope from Alice, tearing it open and pulling out the single piece of hotel stationery and reading the letter to myself, the writing in Bella's own hand.

_Edward, I love you. I am so sorry. He has my mom, and I have to try. I know it may not work. I am so very, very sorry. _

_Don't be angry with Alice and Jasper. If I get away from them, it will be a miracle. Tell them thank you for me. Alice especially, please._

_And please, please don't come after him. That's what he wants, I think. I can't bear it if anyone has to be hurt because of me, especially you. Please, this is the only thing I can ask you now. For me._

_I love you. Forgive me. _

_Bella._

"NO!" I wailed, yet again. An inexplicable sadness overtook me as I realised what she had done. The letter left my hand and fluttered to the ground, Carlisle gathering it up and reading it in silence.

"Poor, brave Bella. James has taken her mother and is using her as bait to draw in his prey," Carlisle explained to the others while I grasped my head in my hands, the torture of what she had done taking over. In that one split second of time, I felt that all was lost.

"Oh no!" Alice screeched. _Why didn't I see it? I haven't seen her mother in any of my visions!_

"Stay calm, Edward," Jasper said as he took a step towards me and placed his hand on my shoulder, willing my emotions back to a stable state. Emmett grasped me once again, his grip increasing in strength as I began to weep. My body lurched forward, Emmett the only thing stopping me from slithering to the ground. Though no tears would come, I cried openly in front of my family, Jaspers gift struggling against the wave of emotions that I was now purging from my body.

_He's losing it!_

"Edward, son, you must try to remain focused," Carlisle said gently as he stood before me, Emmett gripping me on one side and Jasper's hand on me on the other, my family surrounding me protectively as we all stood in the parking lot, mourning the possible demise of Bella and her mother.

"Edward, he doesn't have Renee...I would have seen that. Wait...there's more!" Alice trilled as a further vision danced through her mind, the future that I hoped we were on the path to meet. "The studio's on Cactus," Alice said as her eyes blinked, the name of the street blurring past Bella as she ran along the sun-drenched footpath. This time the vision was different. I had made it there in time, Alice's discovery of the letter apparently changing the course of fate. Though Bella was still injured and lay on the floor in pain, with glass and blood surrounding her, she was still alive!

"LET'S GO!" I bellowed, the vision snapping me out of my misery, anger and determination replacing it in an instant. Carlisle gave me the letter and I placed it in my pocket, keeping the only thing I had left of Bella close.

"But Edward..." Alice said, her faced filled with confusion. _Her hand...has he BITTEN her?_

"NOW!" I pressed, ignoring Alice's question. We needed to make haste, or all would be lost anyway.

"Alright! Let's do this!" Emmett shouted as he scanned the place for a suitably swift vehicle. A red BMW caught his eye and no sooner had he spotted it than we were immediately in the car and Emmett had it started. He switched on the in dash GPS and programmed the street that we searched for. The estimated arrival time was forty five minutes. "We'll make it in twenty," Emmett laughed as he planted his foot on the accelerator and we exited the lot.

We wove through the busy streets of the airport and finally broke free of the traffic that hindered our journey. As I sat in the back seat with Alice and Jasper, I continued to read Alice's thoughts, but they did not change. I knew that we were going to make it, but hoped that Bella would recover from her injuries as quickly as possible. I cringed at the very thought of that animal laying a hand on her, imagining the fear and pain that she would be going through. Bella would be alone with him, open and vulnerable to whatever dark desire he saw fit to unleash upon her, helpless and defenceless. I was more than looking forward to killing him. I sighed in frustration as I willed for the car to travel faster, staring out the window at the buildings that blurred by as we headed towards Scottsdale and the little dance studio that held all that I cared about within its walls. The sun blazed upon this place, reminding me of the stark contrast this place held to Forks, the place where the cloud filled skies and rain gave me no end of comfort and made me feel more human than any other place could or ever would.

"It won't be long now, Edward. You might want to see if you can tune into his thoughts," Emmett suggested as he stared at the GPS.

The voices in my mind were a blur in this large, sprawling city, and I knew that I would need to focus. I was relieved that I had heard his voice before, as the more often I heard a mind's voice, the easier it was to tune in. I closed my eyes and tried to block all the extraneous voices out and hone in on the thoughts of this monster, pressing my hands to my temples as I tried to sort through the din that had increased in volume with my added concentration.

_Hmmm, now where should I start? She's just so breakable! I don't want to kill her right away. That would be so boring!_

My body tensed and my breathing was rapid as I listened, helpless to do anything more. "Hurry up Emmett!" I roared.

"I'm going as fast as I can without rolling the car Edward!" he retorted.

I waved my hand in the air, silently telling him to shut up, trying to tune into James again.

_She can't be serious...she's trying to run! What a stupid human she is! I wonder if I can get her to scream a little for added effect? Well, we will just have to make that happen now won't we! Now to take a close up... the money shot! Her stupid boyfriend's just gonna LOVE this!_

"She's still alive," I mouthed as everyone in the car breathed a sigh of relief.

Then, we all heard him as he spoke. I strained to hear Bella's voice, but all I could hear was her erratic heartbeat and her shallow breaths.

"_That's a very nice effect_," he said calmly. "_I thought this room would be visually dramatic for my little film. That's why I picked this place to meet you. It's perfect, isn't it?"_

And then, we all heard the most sickening sound of them all. A snapping noise, followed by Bella's shocking scream filled the car, causing us all to flinch and for Carlisle to reach behind and cover my mouth with his hand. _Quiet Edward! We don't want to warn him we're here. _I tried with all my might to suppress the roar that needed to escape my lungs, my anger now so raw that I felt myself switch into the worst possible version of myself. Every sinew, bone, and nerve was tensed, ready for a fight. Carlisle watched me carefully as he removed his hand from my mouth, his look of shock and horror at my face an indication of how angry I truly was. Then, the car stopped. We were caught in a traffic jam, and the cars in front had slowed to a crawl as they were being diverted away from roadworks. I had to act quickly. There was no time to lose. I immediately opened the door and ran, James' scent and voice drawing me to the place I needed to be, not caring about who saw me now. There were far more important things to worry about.

_Edward! _

_Sheesh that guy's sure in a hurry! And what's with the skin? _I ran past a man who held a traffic sign, not caring that he saw me.

As I ran, all the hate, pain and anguish flowed through me, causing me to run faster, the monster within unleashed and burning. I heard the voice of my prey again as I approached my destination, blurring by a few humans so quickly that I was gone before they realised my presence. I had never run so quickly.

"_Would you like to rethink your last request?"_ he asked, the pleasant tone in his voice sickening me to the core as my fists clenched so tightly that my nails threatened to pierce my unbreakable skin. Then, her next scream pierced my heart, shattering into a thousand pieces as her pain invaded my moving body.

"_Wouldn't you rather have Edward try to find me?" _

And then, she finally spoke, her voice though pained, once again sent a wave of relief through me as her heartbeat ran like a freight train. _"No!"_ she croaked. _"No, Edward don't..."_ And then, I heard the sickening sound of smashing mirrors and a thudding noise, after which all went quiet.

_Cactus! _I sped to the end of the street, the building making its appearance before my eyes.

I heard the tyres of the BMW screeching in the distance as my family approached. There was no time to waste. I would have to face this monster alone, my thoughts turning to my poor Bella lying there, helpless and alone, writhing in pain.

Bella's scent hit me like a wrecking ball as I grasped the handle and wrenched the door off its hinges. The lobby was empty, the humming air conditioner pushing the smell of Bella's blood right through me, invading me to the core, its source coming from the eastern end of the building. This was not good. James' thoughts in an instant had switched from ones of torture to ones of feeding. I knew I had to stop him. I heard him growl, my body heading towards the noise with lightning speed. The others were on their way but I could no longer wait. He was crouched over her, the anger now burning within me as I recoiled and launched myself at him, roaring as I sprang. I grasped him and pulled him off her, the animal within me now released in its entirety. We rolled on the floor, cracking the floorboards beneath us, the shrieking noise of broken glass scraping across the floor and between our bodies piercing the air.

"Yes!" he said as he broke free of my grasp and got to his feet, backing away towards the remaining mirrors, the sound of crunching glass beneath his feet causing me to cringe as he began to encircle me. _Well now this makes up for how easily I tricked her into coming here! _His eyes were darkened with very little crimson. I could tell he had not fed in a while, and knew that he was saving himself just for this moment.

"I'm so very glad you could grace us with your presence, EDDIE!" he snarled. My eyes darted towards Bella. The blood was everywhere! Her eyes were closed and her heart was racing, but she was still alive. _This is going to be more fun than I could ever imagine! Two for the price of one!_

"Believe me, the pleasure's ALL mine!" I hissed in reply as I turned and glared at him, trying to keep my body between him and his quarry, the sound of the approaching car momentarily distracting me.

Detecting my hesitation, in an instant he crouched and launched himself at me, smashing my head against the thick mirror, cracking it behind me. His hand was clutched around my throat as he spoke through clenched teeth. "I see you're alone. You're faster than the others, aren't you?" he asked, nodding his head, agreeing with his own comment. "It really doesn't matter anyway. You and your pet will be dead before they arrive," he said as he inhaled the air around him and listened for their voices.

_Hmmm...they're not here yet. Good! But I wonder about that car...better get this over with quickly then._

Realising that he was momentarily distracted, I bent my knee up towards my chest and put my foot in his stomach, launching him across the room, causing the floorboards to splinter beneath him as he slid into the wall.

I ran towards him with lightning speed, but before I reached him he had flipped forward and was on his feet again, crouched and ready to fight. "Is that the best you've got? What a joke!" he roared. "You may be a fast runner, but fighting's not exactly your strong suit, is it...EDDIE my boy?"

"I'm strong enough to kill YOU!" I hissed in anger.

_Edward, we're nearly there! Try to keep him there, but be careful! _Carlisle's thoughts came through loud and clear. They were only mere moments away now.

He laughed at me mockingly. "Oh really? You think so do you? You know, it was very rude of you to interrupt me! Mind you, I don't understand the appeal of her scent. It's really no different from the rest of them. Then again, I guess the world would be a boring place if we all liked the same things, wouldn't it?" he said menacingly. "Though, now that you're here, I can't wait to have you watch me drain every last drop from her!"

"You will NEVER have her!" I snarled, my teeth snapping together, the urge to tear his throat out overwhelming everything else.

"Oh, poor, delusional Edward," he said, shaking his head and clicking his tongue with disappointment. "You really shouldn't wear your heart on your sleeve so much. It makes you so vulnerable. And for what? Her? She's just a HUMAN! Do you know what I like to DO to humans before I take their life? DO YOU?" he growled, as I read his foul thoughts, the sound of the squealing tyres and roaring engine distracting him once again. I stood between James and Bella, and was the only thing keeping him from ending her. _Hmmm...I need to get to her. They're nearly here and I need to at least kill HER before I get out of here. Then HE can spend an eternity suffering! _I knew what he was about to do as his eyes flickered to the ceiling, and he moved to launch himself in the air in an attempt to jump over me.

"NO!" I roared, launching myself in the air in response to his thoughts, our bodies clashing together, the resulting thunderous noise ringing through the room as I reached the air before him. My momentum caused us to fly in the opposite direction to where he wanted to go, and back towards the already cracked mirror that remained. We landed heavily against it, his back smashing the mirror and shattering it into thousands of tiny pieces. I immediately braced his body up against the broken shards before he had the chance execute another attack, my arm across the base of his throat, rendering him helpless and unable to move.

"How...how did you..." he asked as his darkened, confused eyes stared into mine.

"Oh, I can read your mind, James. No matter what you decide to do now, I will know it before YOU do!" I replied, grinning at him, unable to stop myself from revealing my secret weapon.

With my body still bracing him to the wall and without another word or thought of hesitation, I leaned in and latched my mouth around his throat, tearing away a huge chunk of his skin with my teeth. I spat it out in disgust, growling at him as his yelp made me smile more evilly than I could have ever imagined possible. "You will NEVER touch another human again! DO YOU HEAR ME?" I spat, spraying venom at his face with each word. The confidence had suddenly drained from his face, and was quickly replaced by fear and a small whimper escaping his now trembling lips. My revenge was becoming sweeter by the minute.

"Edward, remember who you are," Carlisle said coolly, just as I became aware of him standing behind me.

"Oh, I do," I hissed as my eyes gazed into the black ones of James, boring my murderous intent into them, causing him to shudder beneath me. _Please! Don't kill me Edward! Don't you know how good I could be with your coven? I could hunt down anyone who threatened you! PLEASE?_

I threw my head back and laughed thunderously at this cowardly vampire's thoughts, bereft of any sympathy for him, devoid of any feelings of mercy.

"Edward. Bella needs you," Carlisle said more forcefully as Jasper and Emmett forcibly removed me from James and pushed me aside, both of them holding their breath as they reached for James. Their actions snapped me back to reality as I took in the thoughts of everyone around me. They both had James in their grasp instantly, his struggles futile against their combined strength as Carlisle kept a close eye on James.

_Just keep it together. Bella IS worth saving... _Jasper thought.

_Sheesh Edward! She's bleeding! Aww MAN!_

_Oh no! The blood! _Alice began to collect the broken pieces of timber flooring, her breaths shallow, throwing them in the corner furthest away from where Bella lay, and watching for any signs of Jasper or Emmett's resolve weakening as she began to construct a pyre.

My thoughts then turned to the reason I was here and in an instant I was by her side, the urge to protect Bella suddenly becoming more important as I realised that there was a room full of vampires and a helpless, bleeding Bella lying on the floor, unconscious. The very sight of her caused me to slump beside her, my body on the verge of collapse.

"Oh no, Bella, no!" I cried in horror as I saw her lying there in a pool of her own blood, her body unmoving as every part of her exposed skin and her clothing was red with it, my eyes darting over every inch of her as I tried to comprehend what had happened.

Jasper and Emmett would have to exact revenge on my behalf, I realised. I had to be with Bella. James let out a final growl in defiance, but it did not last for more than a second. After that, I heard James shriek in pain as Emmett and Jasper tore each arm away from his body, the screeching, metallic noise an unmistakable indicator of his pending demise. Hatred for what this vampire had done to Bella was causing every nerve in my body to zing as I watched her with intent, my mind racing and panicked at the sight of her broken body.

"Bella, please! Bella, listen to me please, please, please, Bella, please! I begged, needing her to open her eyes, my will to save her life overriding my desire for her blood. I had never felt more helpless.

"Carlisle! I called in an agonised voice, never taking my eyes off her. "Bella, Bella, no, oh please, no, no!" I said, sobbing in broken, tearless sobs which caused a pain within my chest, the gaping hole reappearing and widening with every passing moment.

Carlisle was at her side in an instant, and placed his hands on her head to check the wound there. Then, Bella finally broke free of her unconscious state and shrieked in pain. Though I was distressed by the thought of her being in any sort of agony, the sound of her cry gave me cause to hope that she would be alright.

"Bella!" I cried, willing her to push through the darkness and speak to me.

"She's lost some blood, but the head wound isn't deep," Carlisle said. "Watch out for her leg, it's broken," he added, confirming the sickening noise that we had heard in the car to be that of her fragile leg breaking. Carlisle then felt her ribs and added, "Some ribs too I think."

I howled with rage, upset that anything of her had been harmed, the hatred for the carnage that James had unleashed surging through me like an unquenchable fire, burning relentlessly through every inch of my body.

_I-I have to go. I can't stand this any longer...the blood...! _I watched as Jasper left the room, his face filled with remorse as he backed his way through the door after throwing the head of James on top of his dismembered body. Emmett followed quickly. _Sorry bro! Can't say if I'll be okay or not, but now that Jasper's gone, I think I'd better go too._

Alice stood there silently, her mouth gaping as she watched them leave, her head shaking in disbelief.

And then, the most beautiful sound I could possibly hear filled my ears. "Edward," she whispered, barely a breath leaving her lips, her eyes rolling in their sockets beneath closed lids.

"Bella, you're going to be fine. Can you hear me, Bella? I love you," I said, wanting more than anything to stare into the depths of her eyes and to hear her voice once again.

"Edward," she repeated, her voice becoming clearer.

"Yes, I'm here," I said, my heart ready to burst forth from my chest.

"It hurts," she whimpered.

"I know Bella, I know," I said, turning to Carlisle and adding an anguished, "can't you do anything?"

"My bag please...Hold your breath Alice. It will help," Carlisle suggested as he indicated to Alice to bring his medical bag over that he had dropped at the door. My eyes darted briefly to the small table that had been knocked over next to the doorway, and I noted the video camera that lay there on the floor before returning my gaze to Alice.

She did as Carlisle instructed and held her breath. I watched Alice carefully to ensure that she was under control. She nodded her head once, her thoughts letting me know that her mind was still on the task at hand. _I'm fine Edward. _With that, she picked up Carlisle's medical bag and was with us in an instant_._

"Alice?" Bella groaned, realising that she was by her side. That was indeed a good sign, her awareness returning with every breath she took, though her eyes were still closed.

_Tell her I'm here Edward. I don't want to open my mouth to speak, just in case._

"She's here. She knew where to find you," I said, silently thanking my sister as our eyes briefly met.

"My hand hurts," she murmured, her voice barely a whisper, her eyes still closed.

"I know, Bella. Carlisle will give you something, it will stop," I replied soothingly.

I watched as Carlisle got out a needle and syringe, immediately inserting it into a vial of morphine and injecting it into her arm so swiftly that she did not even flinch.

He had barely removed the needle when her eyes fluttered open and she screamed, "My hand is burning!"

"Bella?" I asked, the fear suddenly wrapping itself around me like a wet blanket, threatening to drag me under as I was trying to decipher her reaction to the morphine.

"The fire! Someone stop the fire!" she screamed in horror.

"Carlisle! Her hand!" I roared as I picked up her delicate arm and saw the blood flowing from her hand, the mark of James' teeth unmistakable, the last word his. All his.

"He bit her," Carlisle confirmed, appalled at the situation. My breath caught in my throat, the horror of what James had unleashed upon my beautiful girl burning me from the inside out. I had not had my revenge, James had instead taken his, and though he lay there shredded to pieces, he was the ultimate victor in this game.

A vision of Bella's heartbeat ebbing away danced through Alice's mind as Bella lay there still and unmoving, too much blood lost to save her, not enough venom to change her before she loses her battle and her heart gives out. _We have to do something or it's all over Edward. She will die if you leave her this way. I didn't want to tell you this, but I've seen her changed and I've seen her dead. I've seen in it more than one vision since we came to Phoenix. I just couldn't figure out how it was happening, because Bella was the one who kept changing the course of her destiny. Now it's your turn to decide, Edward. Please, change her destiny._

"Edward, you have to do it," she said out loud to make her point, finally releasing her breath to speak. Carlisle brushed Bella's blood away from her eyes, her scalp still flowing with blood as he checked the wound.

"No!"I bellowed in anguish, refusing to change her.

"There may be a chance," Carlisle interjected.

"What?" I begged, wanting to hear anything but the alternatives that lay before me now.

He picked up her hand and studied the wound carefully. "See if you can suck the venom back out. The wound is fairly clean," he said as he reached for his bag and retrieved a needle and thread, immediately beginning to stitch up the gash on her delicate scalp.

"Will that work?" Alice asked, her voice strained as the previous visions in her mind began to flicker and fade.

"I don't know," Carlisle replied. "But we have to hurry," he added, glancing towards me.

"Carlisle, I..." I said, hesitating. "I don't know if I can do that," I answered, the agony of what I needed to do overwhelming me, filling me with fear and doubt.

Carlisle looked at Alice, who was holding her breath again, and she shook her head emphatically, refusing to be the one to do this.

_Don't look at me Edward. I'm using every bit of will I can now to stop myself from draining Bella as it is! It's all up to you. Please, Edward, I love her!_

"It's your decision, Edward, either way. I can't help you. I have to get this bleeding stopped here if you're going to be taking blood from her hand." _Edward, you love Bella. Find the will. I know you can do it. _

Bella's body began to writhe in pain as memories of my own change were brought forth. I knew what she was enduring now and I realised that I had the power to either take it away, or to give it strength if things did not go as planned. Of course, the third alternative, me killing her, was always a distinct possibility as well.

"Edward!" Bella screamed, as if prompting me to do something, anything, to stop the pain that had begun its march its way through her body. Her eyes found mine, finally, and I stared at her with a look of indecision and pain. Her face was filled with an agony that I had never seen before today. I knew that pain, my change fresh in my mind as if it were yesterday, but to see it expressed from Bella's beautiful face, which was now contorted in agony, broke my heart a thousand times over.

"Alice, get me something to brace her leg!" Carlisle ordered as he continued to stitch Bella's head wound. Alice nodded and retrieved some floorboards, quickly taking some bandages from the medical bag as she splinted Bella's leg. "Edward, you must do it now, or it will be too late," Carlisle pressed, his voice urgent now.

Bella watched my face with intent, the pain in her eyes too much to withstand. I had to do something, and had run out of time. Suddenly, a wave of determination swept through me, the clarity of what I must do now the only thing left. There was, simply, no other way. No alternative. No other choice to be made. Her eyes softened as my face changed expression from one of confusion and trepidation to one of steely determination. JAMES WAS NOT GOING TO WIN!

Carlisle and Alice nodded in readiness as they held Bella's body as still as possible, waiting for me to do what I thought was never possible for me have the fortitude to do in all my years of existence.

I took her heated, blood soaked hand in mine and locked my fingers around either side of the wound. I bent over and pressed my lips to her skin and sank my teeth into the indentation of the bite, James' venom the first thing that hit my tongue.

She screamed in pain as my teeth plunged into her skin, her body writhing in response. Carlisle and Alice held her fast, but then, I was suddenly sent into oblivion, failing to notice anything except her blood. The very centre of my universe. I groaned and closed my eyes, tasting the sweetest ambrosia that God had ever put on this earth, losing myself in her taste as her body thrashed around me. I drank the sweet nectar of her, resisting with every fibre of my being to drain every last drop of her blood from her body as her thrashing began to subside. My body began to convulse and as I tried to keep control, the taste of Bella's blood began to fill me to the brim, intoxicating me, drugging me. Sweeping me away. I was freefalling, unable to grasp onto anything now, forever lost in the taste of her, as I partook of my one drug of choice.

Then, she was still. His venom was gone. This was the moment of truth. The moment that would decide her fate. Her heart was slowing and I knew that it was time. If I did not cease soon, all would be lost. _Edward. Stop Edward. Find it in your heart to stop what you're doing before you kill her._

Carlisle's thoughts entered my mind, and then flew away just as quickly as I drank of her once again and allowed the warm, heavenly liquid to once again flow down my throat. I knew that her blood was clean in that moment. Nothing but a mixture of her blood and morphine were present in her bloodstream any longer. There was only one person who could stop me from doing the unthinkable. The very same person that I was about to kill.

_Edward, you need to listen. If you don't stop she will DIE! You know I've seen it. You must decide before it's too late. She's lost too much blood, Edward! _Her vision once again invaded my mind, Bella's still, lifeless body causing me to hesitate.

"Edward," Bella whispered at the right moment, warm breath fanning across my face, the sound of her voice then jolting me back to reality.

_EDWARD! _I felt Carlisle's hand pull at me, causing me to release my hold of her immediately. I sat back, retreating from my position, taking in her pallid features as I gasped in horror at the thought of what I had done. Was I too late? Was this all for nought? HAD James won after all? I could picture him now, laughing mockingly at my weakness, berating me for my failure to do what every known vampire does.

"He's right here, Bella," Carlisle said as he grasped her hand and cleaned the wound, any remains of my venom removed as he deftly stitched it and dressed it with gauze. The instinct to flee had made a brief appearance as my fear and doubt rose within, until the sweetest sound that I could imagine drew me forth once again.

"Stay, Edward, stay with me..." she said softly, her voice so very weak. I was never leaving her side again. Her heart began the search for its natural rhythm, but was still struggling to find its way.

"I will," I replied, my voice strained as the gravity of what I could have possibly done hit me. At the same time I felt triumphant as I realised what I had achieved, which was nothing short of a miracle.

"Bella?" Carlisle asked.

"Mmmmm?" she replied incoherently.

"Is the fire gone?"

"Yes," she sighed. "Thank you, Edward."

"I love you," I whispered as I leant into her.

"I know," she breathed, exhausted. She had never looked more vital, more alive, even though she struggled to keep her eyes open and was covered in blood. I laughed weakly in response, the relief washing through me. I was never more pleased that I was about to watch my Bella sleep once again, reminding me that she was still very much a human being.

Alice reached around the doorway and retrieved a can of gasoline, and I realised that they had been busy while I was fighting James. _It was in the trunk, _Alice confirmed.

"Bella?" Carlisle asked again, causing Bella to frown.

"What?" she murmured, sleep threatening to take her under.

"Where is your mother?"

"In Florida," she sighed. "He tricked me, Edward. He watched our videos," she added, trying to be outraged, but her weariness winning out. "Alice," she croaked, trying to open her eyes. "Alice, the video, he knew you. Alice, he knew where you came from," she said, deliriously weak. "I smell gasoline," she added finally, her strength ebbing away from her as Alice opened the can of gasoline and spread its contents over the twitching pile that was once the hunter. After throwing the can onto the pyre, she calmly walked over and picked up the video camera that still lay on the floor, staring at it with widening eyes as she turned the power on and pressed play.

_We will need to get Bella to the hospital. _

"It's time to move her," he said as I nodded to Carlisle once in understanding.

"No, I want to sleep," Bella complained, her voice a forceless whisper.

"You can sleep, sweetheart, I'll carry you," I said soothingly as I gently placed my arms beneath her body and lifted her up into my arms, her body cradling into my chest as if it was made to remain there forever. "Sleep now, Bella," I said finally, her body relaxing into mine and her deep breaths soothing me as she finally surrendered to the call of slumber's rest.

I stared at Alice and watched her as she replayed the footage of the video, her eyes widening with shock as she listened to the portion where James told her where she was from. James had once come across an irresistible scent and had pursued Alice, who had been committed to an asylum and administered shock treatment because of her gifts that the possessed even as a human. He did not kill Alice, but instead killed the old vampire who had changed her in revenge. James saw that killing Bella would somehow avenge the one victim that he had lost. My body tensed with hatred for the hunter once again.

"I'm so sorry, Alice," I whispered as I hesitated at the door.

She shrugged her shoulders casually, then leaned over the dismembered body and set alight a piece of clothing, the accelerant immediately causing the flames to spread over the rest of his body, an immediate plume of purple smoke billowing into the air. "It's alright Edward. I have my revenge now," she seethed.

"Alice, you will remain here and ensure that nothing remains of James before the authorities arrive and that Jasper and Emmett are alright, and we will meet you at the hospital later," Carlisle requested as I rushed out the door and found another car waiting in the lot, my eyes remaining alert in case there was a human close by.

Emmett emerged, keeping his distance as he hid in the shadows of the building across the street as his thoughts broke through. _Sorry Edward. At least you have a car to get her to the hospital in that won't be reported stolen yet. Besides, what kind of IDIOT leaves the keys in the ignition? _"Thank you," I said as I ran across to the car, the sun hitting my skin as my eyes darted for any signs of a human approaching. To my relief, the street was abandoned.

The thick smoke began to waft through the doorway that I had just exited, its sickly scent a reminder of the horror that had occurred here today. As I pondered, Carlisle's thoughts came through clearly and with question. _Why did James have to push things to where we had to kill him? _Carlisle would never change. He even felt sorry for that monster, so I knew that attempting to change his views on preservation of life at all costs would be a lost cause.

_I'm so glad he's DEAD! _Alice's thoughts caused me to chuckle, hers a polar opposite of Carlisle's and also much in keeping with mine.

"Carlisle," I murmured.

_I'm coming, Edward._

I listened to the conversation carry on from within the building, willing Carlisle to hurry up as I placed Bella in the backseat of the car and got in, immediately starting the engine and revving the car impatiently.

"We will leave the BMW here to make it look like a break and enter, and before you leave please ensure that it's just what it looks like. Then, I would like you to do a little demolition work for me."

"Oh, now that sounds exciting!" she replied in earnest.

"Let's see. Ah, yes. The three of us came to Phoenix to convince Bella to return to Forks. Bella agreed to see us and she went to the hotel to meet with us there. On her way up to the room, Bella tripped and fell down the stairs. Alice, you know what to do," he said. "Return to the hotel you stayed at. I will see you later."

"Yay!" she said gleefully, clapping her hands. I would not be surprised if she was dancing around the pyre at this very moment, her sense of revenge and victory overwhelming her every thought.

Carlisle immediately left the building and Alice stood at the door, smiling wickedly as we left the lot and pulled away, speeding towards the hospital, to the place that would bring her some sense of normalcy, some semblance of reality.

"She will more than likely need a transfusion," Carlisle said, causing me to wince. "Don't worry, Edward. Bella will be fine," he added. I nodded in acquiescence. Today was a close call. A day that I never wanted to relive again. A day that taught me so many things, good and bad, about myself. A day that I somehow found the will to resist the call of Bella's blood. I silently pondered what all of this meant. Bella's life hung in the balance because of me. She was also saved because of me. And now, I could do the right thing and allow her to live a normal, happy life. My mind warred with my heart once again, the internal battle continuing with fervour as we drove on...


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Well, I hope you've enjoyed this story so far...not too many more chapters to go! I've been having a great time writing this for you guys! I must say I will miss the evil James...but at least he went down in a blaze of glory (literally hehe). Unfortunately this is only a short chapter...but I thought better little than none at all! BUSY BUSY!**

**I'm so sorry that it's been ages since I've added to this...but I've had a few things going on in my life unfortunately! Thanks Jennifer for your kind words of encouragement! **

**THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO MY FRIEND CHERYL...HANG IN THERE LOVE AND I HOPE IAN RECOVERS**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight! If I did I'd be quitting my job right now!**

EPOV

Smelling fresh blood, Carlisle deftly climbed into the backseat with Bella and as we sped back towards the heart of the city, he said, "She's lost consciousness, but she will be fine Edward. I just need to get this bleeding stopped." He began to unwrap and redress her wounds, and as he did, I caught sight of James' bite mark, reflected in the rear view mirror. Anger then began to invade me and in response my foot pressed down harder on the accelerator.

"Take care of her Carlisle, and I will get her there as quickly as I can," I said icily, trying to remain focused whilst inside my emotions were entirely frayed. Her scent had exploded within the confined space of the car with the fresh blood, but I didn't care nor respond. I was a man on a mission, focused wholly and solely on getting my love the medical attention she so desperately needed. Angry, bitter, relentless. I had no room to afford any breakdowns on my part. She needed me.

Carlisle took out his phone and began to dial Charlie's number to explain the lie that we had concocted to explain Bella's current state. He never took his eyes off her, his hands expertly tending to her and trying to slow the bleeding as I drove like a madman towards the hospital, and gripped the steering wheel tightly as I waited for the inevitable difficult conversation that was now to occur. I opened my ears and clenched my teeth, waiting for Carlisle to deliver the news.

"Bella?" Charlie asked with futility and desperation as he answered the phone.

"Chief Swan, this is Dr. Carlisle Cullen."

"Yes, Carlisle, what can I do for you?" he sighed, his voice highly stressed as he spoke. He would still be very upset by Bella's sudden departure and I imagined that every phone call would fill him with hope on one hand, but anxiety and bitter disappointment on the other.

"Charlie, Edward informed me yesterday that Bella was distressed about staying in Forks and left to go back to Phoenix," Carlisle said with authority.

"OH NO! YOU'RE NOT SAYING...WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO BELLA?" he screamed down the phone, knowing that Carlisle had some bad news to tell him, as there had been more than one occasion that Carlisle had to contact the Chief of Police to inform him of the death of a citizen of Forks. Carlisle cringed in response, but remained, as always, calm.

"Charlie, you must calm down and listen. Bella is alive, but she has had an accident."

"NO!" he cried in anguish. There was the noise of the phone dropping and muffled screams in the background as the shock and realisation hit him hard.

"Charlie!" Carlisle shouted, willing him to pick up the phone.

Then, I heard it. The sound of a man's heart breaking. Charlie had broken down, and was crying uncontrollably, screaming profanities through his tears. The sounds his of mournful cries echoed through the phone, causing my stomach to wretch as if I was about to purge Bella's blood out of my system. It was as if someone had literally torn the heart and soul out of him, and I was to blame for the brutality that had been unleashed on this poor man.

"Pick up the phone Charlie!" Carlisle roared in exasperation.

His sobs began to slow, and he muttered incoherently under his breath, "Bella...Bella...Why? Why...didn't I stop you?" until he finally picked up the phone, reason and logic returning somewhat. "I need to get to Bella. Tell me...what happened," he said finally, his voice now filled with pain as he openly sobbed over the phone.

"Edward was concerned that Bella had left so abruptly during the night, so Edward, Alice and I travelled to Phoenix to try and convince Bella to return home to you," he said calmly.

"And?" he asked with impatience, his voice agonized.

"I contacted Bella at the hotel where we were staying and convinced her to meet us. Unfortunately, she came to grief and fell down two flights of stairs then crashed through a window," he said as Charlie's sobs increased. "She has a broken leg and some broken ribs, has some cuts which I have stitched and has also lost some blood," he said in his most soothing voice.

"Will she be alright?" he said sighing loudly, his voice now filled with relief, causing my body to relax somewhat. Considering Bella's past, perhaps a broken leg was just par for the course, I mused, and not the worst injury that she had been inflicted with. I recalled the time at the hospital after Bella's near fatal car accident, where Carlisle had shown me x-rays of Bella's head, and there were signs of previous trauma there as if she'd come to grief on more than one occasion. If only he knew that I was her worst enemy and that I could inflict more upon her than anything else could, certainly more than her clumsiness or any bump on the head ever would.

"Of course, Charlie. Bella will be fine. If you would be so kind as to get in touch with Bella's mother to inform her of the situation."

"I'll call Renee and book a flight now," he said, sighing heavily once more, he voice cracking under the strain but exuding relief nonetheless. "Thanks for letting me know, Carlisle," he said hurriedly as his mind no doubt was ticking over, making plans.

"We will be waiting. And, never fear Charlie. I will make sure they take good care of her," he said assuredly as Charlie hung up the phone before Carlisle finished his sentence.

As we arrived at the hospital and screeched to a halt in the loading zone, I got out of the car and carefully pulled Bella into my arms. Carlisle took the car and abandoned it in the adjacent car lot before quickly catching up with me. We raced through the glass sliding doors that would lead us to the Emergency room, which opened just in time for us to enter with ease without me having to kick them open in frustration. Everyone's thoughts flooded my mind, the thoughts of pain, anguish and suffering piercing me as I used considerable effort to block them out. I didn't know how Carlisle could work in a hospital. At least he only heard what they said out loud, not what was on their tortured minds, but still...

"Nurse!" shouted Carlisle authoritatively as we approached the bedlam that was the emergency room of St Luke's Medical Centre. "I am Dr Carlisle Cullen. This young woman has had a serious fall and has lost a lot of blood, and is in dire need of a transfusion." Suddenly there was as rush of orderlies, nurses and an older doctor who emerged through the double doors of the emergency room.

As they muttered and shouted amongst themselves, I still held Bella in my arms as she lay in the crook of my neck unmoving, her body weak and in shock from the loss of blood and the trauma she had just experienced. An orderly brought a gurney out and I gently, but reluctantly, lay her body down as the medical staff proceeded to check her vital signs, their mutterings a blur of words that I pushed into the background. I was only focused on one thing. Bella. Her beating heart. Her fragile breaths. Her beautiful face. Her magnificent scent. There, laying on that hospital gurney, was my entire world.

They wheeled her away swiftly, and I felt actual physical pain as I watched her go, my fragile heart already pining for her, my body being tugged in her direction. I did not want to leave her for one moment, and though I knew that she was being well cared for by her own kind, something that I could never imagine doing myself in such situations, I still could not bear being away from her for a millisecond. This was all my doing. After all, I had come to within an inch of ending her. How I hated what I had done! I let out a small growl and was about to follow Bella as the doctor spoke.

_I have heard of Dr. Cullen's diagnostic abilities. _"I am Dr. Grainger, Dr. Cullen. It is a pleasure and privilege to meet you. You are welcome to proceed with me, but this young man will need to wait here," he said as he raised his greying, matted brows at me authoritatively above the black rims of his eye glasses. _I hope this young man does not cause any trouble...he looks so angry! _My fists clenched in protest as I opened my mouth to argue, but I was interrupted by Carlisle's knowing glance and rational thoughts.

_Edward. Just let me handle things. We need to ensure that Bella is cared for, so please remain calm. We cannot risk anything to chance right now. _I wanted more than anything to run past him at blinding speed and follow my love, but knew that it would cause more trouble for all of us, and attract unwanted attention. I knew that Bella was in the best of hands, and she needed to heal, but yet I wanted to steal her away from here nonetheless. How illogical I was! I realised I would need to have to go against my ingrained, preordained nature and muster patience, concede defeat. Again. Always again...

"Stay here, Edward," Carlisle said softly. "I need to give details of Bella's condition to Dr. Grainger." He handed me his phone and added, no doubt in an attempt to distract me, "You will need to call Alice and let her know where we are." Carlisle then began to play his role as a fully-fledged human doctor and as he took over proceedings, explaining that he had treated Bella at the scene of her 'accident', I felt my stomach tighten as memories of what happened invaded me, joining in concert with my feelings of loss. I watched as they followed Bella down the corridor and turned the corner, my anguish unable to be suppressed as she disappeared from my sights.

It was certainly convenient to have a Doctor in the family, never more than now and I knew that Carlisle would ensure he oversaw every facet of Bella's treatment, but the pain still crept up on me as the distance between Bella and I increased. I stood there, stressed and still, closing my eyes briefly as I inhaled her scent, its glorious aroma still distinct as always over the other smells typical of those in hospitals.

"Waiting room's that way," the plump nurse pointed out as she approached the nurse's station where I stood and stared at me with an odd, startled look. I knew I must have appeared anything but human, but I didn't care. _What a strange boy. Shame really. He's so very handsome. What a waste...perhaps I should direct him to the psych ward..._

Psych ward indeed. Without so much as a word acknowledging that the woman spoke, I swiftly turned on my heels and walked numbly toward the waiting room.

The small room was mostly vacant, to my relief, with only a few people sitting against the wall closest to the door. Their thoughts were there, invading my mind at the most inappropriate time, which ranged from grief to fear and anxiety and I tried to rid myself of their darkness. I walked towards the back of the room and sat down, trying to appear as normal as I could. Trying unsuccessfully to escape their morbid inclinations and their own little crises.

"Bella," I whispered through my barely moving lips, my body aching for her, my feelings of loss overwhelming me as I nearly crushed the phone in my hand. It had finally hit. The events of today had caught up with me. All the fear, anger, love and hate that I had experienced on this day filled me to the brim, then shot through me like a cannonball, causing me to whimper softly in response. I needed to expel this pain somehow, but knew that I would be unable to find that sort of release until I had Bella well away from here and back in my arms, healthy and full of life. This was going to be a very long hospital stay.

I stood to my feet, the desire to be alone driving me out of the room. I needed time to gather myself without being under the watchful eye of humans. I walked past the desk and asked the plump nurse, "Is there anywhere quiet I can go?"

"Not really. You could try the chapel, though. Sometimes it helps," she offered kindly as she indicated past the waiting room to the end of the hall.

"Thank you," I whispered as I followed the signs to the chapel. The doors were oak and had pink, red and orange stained glass panels contained within them. Just staring at the hues which were made not in the shape of anything in particular, each one individual but somehow fitting together like a perfect puzzle reminded me of one thing. Us. Bella and I. We were different, and yet we somehow fit together, our combination making a glorious masterpiece. At least, I hoped we did. Not a whisper came from behind the doors, and I knew it was empty.

I opened the door entered, and the room glowed soft pink, bejewelled, with the stained glass panels continuing around the room as rows of lit candles graced the front of the chapel to the right of the pulpit. Five rows of simple, modern pews graced the small space. I was alone. In the last place I ever expected to be. Ever. I was half expecting to be struck down by His wrath, burned to a cinder where I stood, but instead a feeling of peace and tranquillity seemed to wash through me, surprising me, causing me to take in a quick gasp of air.

I put the phone in my pocket and walked towards the front of the chapel and sat, wondering what would happen if I prayed, and whether or not those prayers would be answered. After all, I was inhuman, and damned to the fires of hell. Then again, perhaps this was the only place that I might rid myself of this guilt, this heavy burden that I now carried squarely on my shoulders. I had been the cause of Bella's near death experience, and after her surviving James' torture, I nearly took her life myself. Whilst Bella lived in a world of vampires, what chance of survival did she honestly have? Time ticked on relentlessly, my eyes focused entirely on the burning candles before me as I contemplated what to do next.

Having nothing left to lose, I closed my eyes, and clasped my hands together in prayer, lowering my head in reverence. I prayed for a solution to our unique set of problems, and to free myself of this heavy burden. I also prayed for my family and for Bella to be safe and happy. I begged for our love to conquer all challenges that now lay ahead of us. I searched for answers to all my prayers, trying to find a way to give Bella everything she deserved. It was of no use. While I was near her and a part of her life, these problems would forever remain, rearing their ugly head at any given moment without prior warning. I sat there in silence for an eternity, watching as the light flickered and changed when the candles slowly began to extinguish one by one. That vision was clearly a metaphor for Bella's fragile life, and forced me to begin to beg the heavens out loud for what I wanted.

"God...or whoever it is out there...I beg you...please give me the strength to do the right thing by Bella Swan," I muttered under my breath. "Please make me strong enough to let her go when I must...and please keep her safe within your bosom and do not curse her to an existence of purgatory because of me when I am gone...I know I am cursed, but do not allow her to be because she cares for a monster like me...please..."

My body shook and I wept openly once more, just as Carlisle approached and sat quietly next to me. "Edward," he murmured as he placed his arm on my shoulder. "You have done nothing but the right thing today, and I am so very proud of you."

"How can you SAY that, when I nearly killed her?" I hissed, my voice broken, my clasped hands now balled fists in my lap as I tried with all my strength to keep my voice down. "I nearly ruined everything! And James! Do you know what he was going to DO to her! I have NEVER heard such vile thoughts. NEVER!" I cried in anguish, my sobbing now turning into howls of grief and loss as I grasped my hair in my hands. Carlisle sat with me, silently allowing me to let out all of my pent up emotions, still and stressed as Carlisle's comforting words tried to soothe me.

"Edward, son, he is gone. He cannot hurt our family any longer. Please do not berate yourself because you nearly did not stop. No-one can stop. No-one! Especially one who has to deal with blood that calls to him as Bella's does to you. You are without a doubt the strongest young man I have had the privilege of knowing," he said with pride.

Before I had the chance to come out of my self induced trance and respond, the phone buzzed in my pocket. I took it from my pocket and handed it back to Carlisle, not in the mood to chat with my sister.

"Yes Alice," he breathed with impatience, her timing as always impeccable.

"It's all in place, Carlisle. How's Bella doing?" she asked.

"Bella is being treated now," he replied. "She will be fine, but you may want to stay away until afterwards."

"Oh, I'm not going anywhere! The hotel gave us the best suite in the house, so we will wait here until you let us know," she said, giggling. "Seems that Bella's little accident has made them want to treat us extra special!"

"And tell Edward to cheer up man!" I heard Emmett say in the background.

"Yes. Please tell Edward to stand up and walk out of that chapel. It's creeping me out seeing him in there, and it's doing him no good!" she commanded. "BELLA NEEDS YOU, SO GET TO HER ROOM AND SEE HER!" she bellowed.

"Fine, Alice. We will let you know if we hear anything more," Carlisle replied as he ended the call. "Come on son, let us see if there is further news regarding our Bella." He said that with such affection, that it made me stop and stare at my father.

"You truly mean that?" I asked of him, his eyes gentle as he smiled.

"Of course. Bella is now very much a part of our family," he whispered.

We stood to our feet and walked in silence from the chapel, passing the waiting room and heading toward the nurse's station.

Dr. Grainger was standing there, and his face brightened when he saw us approach. "Dr. Cullen. Miss Swan's transfusions went well and her leg has been plastered. You may see her, however at the moment she is still unconscious," he said as he turned towards me.

"Will she be alright?" I asked, once again fighting the urge to barge past this man at vampire speed.

"Yes of course. Nothing that rest and a little pain relief won't cure," he offered. "She will be quite sore for a while, especially due to her broken ribs, which is why we have her sedated at the moment."

"What room is she in Dr. Grainger?" Carlisle asked with logic. I didn't require a room number to find Bella, but knew that we needed to keep up the facade and ask for one anyway.

"Room 17. I have taken the liberty of arranging for a private room for Miss Swan," he answered as he indicated towards the hallway where we were to go.

"Dr. Grainger, Miss Swan is a very important part of this family and I truly do appreciate you taking such good care of her. If you don't mind, my son will stay with her for the night," he said as we walked slowly, staying in pace with the old doctor. I focused on trying to remain calm and to not bolt for her room and as we turned the corner, I began to feel a sense of relief now that I was nearing her.

"Certainly Doctor, of course he may stay, and I will of course do my utmost to ensure that she continues to receive the best of care," he replied with near reverence. "I would be very interested in having a cup of coffee with you and discussing the recent article you wrote on allergies. Do you have time?" he asked as my lips found themselves smiling.

"Certainly, yes, of course I do. Perhaps I could meet you in the cafe after I escort Edward to Bella's room, Dr. Grainger," Carlisle replied with kindness as he patted the doctor on the shoulder.

"Certainly. Shall we say ten minutes? I am due for a break then," he enquired as he checked his watch.

"Of course," Carlisle replied as the doctor turned and headed back down the hallway towards the nurse's station.

I travelled as fast as was acceptable to human eyes alongside Carlisle, heading down the halls towards the one person that I cared for more than my own life. My Bella. As we approached the hallway that led to her room, a strange scent bombarded my senses, causing me to stop in my tracks for a moment. "What IS that?" I whispered, my nose wrinkling as I tried to decipher the scent that clung to Bella's beautiful smell.

"It's caused by the transfusions. She had to have more than one, don't forget," Carlisle replied, his voice low. "It changes, taints the blood. I've seen it a million times before."

"What?" I cried as if I had lost a little piece of her. Not for wanting to put her life at risk, but I DID NOT like this scent that had invaded Bella's, the unpleasant odour of spruce and a species of dead moss piggybacking with the freesias. This was NOT ACCEPTABLE.

Carlisle smiled, and for a moment I wondered if he could read my thoughts. "Don't worry, Edward. In time her scent will return. Go. Sit with Bella," he encouraged. "I will give you some time alone and go and speak with Dr. Grainger and then head back to the hotel." He turned and took his phone out, dialling Esme's number as he walked away. It seemed that whenever Carlisle saw me near Bella lately, he needed to speak to his own wife, and now I understood exactly how he felt.

"Oh, and by the way, Edward," he said as he held his hand over the phone. "Charlie and Renee will be arriving first thing in the morning. I will be back then and will bring a fresh change of clothes for you."

I nodded and swiftly headed down the long hallway, and within moments was outside her door. I held my breath and opened the door carefully, gasping further as I took in the sight of my poor, broken Bella.

"Bella!" I cried as I was immediately by her side, sitting on the edge of the bed. A heart monitor blipped in the corner of the white room, the fluorescent light somehow making her look even more pallid than usual.

She was hooked up to an IV, and her leg was plastered from her foot to just below her knee. "Oh dear God, Bella!" I bellowed as my eyes scanned her body, focusing lastly on her injured hand. I exhaled and stared at the bandage, thinking about all that had occurred and how close she came to being killed today on more than one occasion. "You don't deserve this!" I cried, watching as her eyes remained still and unopened, the blip of the heart monitor trying to dominate the sound of her own heart which was beating steadily and true. Without realising it, my ear was on her chest, listening to her heart, the sound soothing me and taming the wild angry beast within.

After listening to her heart and it doing its job to calm me, I dragged the plastic chair across the floor and placed it next to the bed. As I sat and watched her carefully, thankful that Carlisle had granted me this time with Bella, I pondered my situation. Whilst in this hospital, I had heard the inner voices of the sick, the infirmed, the dying, the newly born and everything in between. All of their voices told me one thing. Life is precious, fragile. Filled with uncertainty. To be treasured and revered above all else. Never to be taken for granted. I vowed to myself that Bella's life would never be held to ransom again. How I would go about achieving this, I did not know. But when I thought about it, up until now I had not given our unique situation the respect and consideration that it deserved. Up until now I had gone along blindly, hoping that things would somehow work out.

A battle began to rage within me once more, and though my heart had so far been winning out over my head, I needed to think of her and stop being so selfish. I would stand by Bella until she was well enough to leave here, and then consider the options. I would need to think long and hard about each decision I make from now on, so that Bella's life would never be toyed with by anyone again. I sat on the hard plastic chair at her bedside, still and contemplative, the arguments swirling round and round through my head...and never coming to an easy conclusion.

I remained at her bedside all night, waiting for her to wake, listening for any signs of her, pressing my ear to her chest. I wished more than anything that she would at least dream so that she would talk, but the sedation left her dreamless, and me without any way of knowing what was going on in that beautiful mind of hers. I sat and waited...still...unmoving...as her heartbeat rocked me in its arms...


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Thank you all so much for sticking with this story.**

**This chapter is dedicated to Totteacher...thanks for your support my friend! (And we are collaborating at present on a NEW STORY! OOPS SHOULD I HAVE LET THE CAT OUT OF THE BAG YET?) Meanwhile check out her story Unexpected Awakenings – it's another among her plethora of masterpieces! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or I'd be in VEGAS BABY! (hehe Mich)**

EPOV

The night pressed on relentlessly and I continued to contemplate, every passing second heralded by the blip on the monitor as well as her heartbeat and steady breaths. She lay there in her drug induced state, her presence holding me prisoner, her strange scent though tainted, still binding me to her like no other. I sighed as I stared at her beautiful face, holding her frail hand as I did so, my thumb gently tracing over the gauze there. My stomach tightened at the thought of him biting her, and of my subsequent weakness...a flaw which nearly took her away from me forever. I loved her so much, yet I was doing nothing but hurting the one that I held most dear...the one I would sacrifice everything for. Here I was, not only causing her pain, but inventing new ways in which to inflict it, threatening her very existence in the process.

I closed my eyes and began to dream the dream of the sleepless...the dream of an ideal world. I fantasised about perfection. Her perfection. The idea of us being together forever within a perfect world, one without the slings and arrows of reality. I knew that it was a contradiction in terms and in reality an impossibility, but I desired to be with her without putting her life at risk more than anything.

I continued to dream, pushing the dark reality away, allowing myself to be swept up in fantasy for a moment. I smiled as I brought forth the perfect vision in my mind...of us laying together in our meadow in each other's arms, her hot, sweet breaths fanning over my face as I held her. I dreamed of rising on bended knee, appraising her beauty as she lay among the flowers, proposing marriage to her while the flowers danced around her wondrous body in celebration. I smiled as the dream continued, watching in my mind as I placed my mother's ring on her delicate finger, her sweet lips uttering the word 'yes' to my proposal. I sighed as I imagined her dressed in a white flowing wedding gown, standing by my side as we declared our unending love to each other before a thousand witnesses.

I swallowed thickly as I fantasised further...of our wedding night...of me gently removing her gown and kissing her every pulse point as I worked my way downward, her glorious scent surrounding me, her body calling to me like no other. "Oh, Bella," I moaned as the fantasy took over everything, pushing the thoughts of those in this place well towards the back of my mind. I longed to see her lay before me, naked in all her glory as I lovingly took her for the first time. Our first time. Desire surged through my body as I envisioned our bodies intertwining like two broken, missing puzzle pieces finally fitting together and making sense. Lastly, the most impossible vision of all played through my mind...one of her stomach swollen with my child as I held her in my arms and listened to our baby's thrumming heartbeat. My heart broke, the reality of the situation hitting me hard. I was unable to give her any of these things, least of all the latter. I could not offer Bella the things that most humans took for granted, but deserved nonetheless. The things that I would be depriving her over her short life if I chose to remain part of it. She deserved nothing less than a life filled with love, family, marriage and children without the constant threat of peril hanging over her beautiful head. I could offer Bella eternal love and devotion, but would that ever be enough?

"Bella," I whispered. "I love you so much. So much that I will do whatever it takes to make you safe and give you the life that you deserve," I vowed as my eyes tightened shut further and I felt my brow wrinkle with the strain of what I was promising. The fantasies slipped through the cracks of my mind, and in their place a timeless sorrow overwhelmed me, a sorrow that I had never felt before this very moment. My heart ached as I thought about the consequences of leaving her or sending her away forever. My life would be over, and though I knew that Bella would be hurt by my departure, she was human. She would recover. I, on the other hand, would never be the same, my life irrecoverably altered by her presence within it.

As if she knew what I was thinking, Bella let out a little groan, seemingly protesting my deepest of thoughts and darkest of fears. I opened my eyes, the sight of her here in this hospital bed making my ideal fantasies all for nought. How sick I was! Here I was fantasising about giving her everything a human deserved when I was incapable of offering her any part of it. And yet, at the same time, I could not see a way of staying away from her. I was in this way too deep, not only with Bella Swan, but with what our relationship meant to the happiness and very existence of my family.

"I will try to do the right thing, Bella, whatever that is," I whispered in confusion as I gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

She mumbled incoherently and sighed softly through her colourless lips, causing the ache in my heart to a level I thought impossible before now. She was just as bound to me as I was to her, and I knew that leaving her would break her. What was I to do? There seemed to be no easy resolution to this, and my mind was frayed as the possible solutions whirled around in my head, forever unresolved, forever threatening to tear the very life out of the both of us.

"So much for praying," I muttered as I stared at the ceiling. "You are not being very helpful, are you?" I questioned the heavens. Could I have expected anything more?

I sat there and watched the curtained window as the sun's rays broke through, a new day dawning, a new destiny laying in wait. Though I was relieved that these last few yesterdays were behind us, I worried about the rest of the tomorrows. I felt a sense of loss as this particular new day dawned, bringing along with it a new set of challenges...of inevitable questions. Of hard decisions that would now have to be made. I knew I needed to prepare myself for whatever outcomes occurred on this day, and for the questions that Bella's parents would demand answers to. As I pondered, I heard Carlisle's thoughts invade me just before he walked through the door.

_Son, I'm on my way. _Great. Back to reality.

"Edward, how is she this morning?" Carlisle asked as he quietly entered the room, holding some neatly pressed black trousers and a blue shirt in his hands along with a towel and a small bag of toiletries.

"The same," I responded, exhaling deeply as I gently stroked her hand, feeling the weight of the world pressing down upon my shoulders. "How long will she be sedated?"

"Another day at least," he said as he placed the clothes on the end of Bella's bed and picked up her chart, studying it carefully. "She needs to heal, and the best way for her to do that is to be sedated. When Dr. Grainger comes in I will consult with him and let you know." He hung the chart back on the end of the bed.

I nodded once, silently thanking Carlisle for everything he had done. Carlisle smiled warmly in response, before checking his watch.

"I've just spoken to Renee and she is on her way now. Charlie will arrive later this morning, so I will remain here to meet them both. Alice will pick up Charlie from the airport and bring him here to visit when he arrives."

"I worry what Charlie and Renee will think of all this," I murmured as I turned and stared at my love.

"They will think nothing more than what we tell them. That Bella lost her balance and fell. Please, Edward, stop torturing yourself like this. You have done nothing but the right thing from the start."

"No I haven't Carlisle! If I had done the right thing in the beginning and stayed away from Bella, she would not be here in this hospital bed!" I seethed.

"Edward. You must stop this. No matter what guilt you think you feel now, please do not ever regret loving Bella. She has brought you to life...can't you see that? Can't you see how her presence has had an effect on us all? This one human girl has brought this family together more closely than I could ever have imagined. Bella Swan has single-handedly breathed new life into each and every one of us, and I will not allow you to torture yourself this way any longer, Edward Cullen!"

I released Bella's hand, the frustration within me threatening to spill over. "Can't you see that this is entirely my fault, Carlisle?" I roared as I stood and threw my arms up in exasperation, pacing back and forth as I ranted. "No matter what I do to protect her, I HURT her Carlisle! LOOK AT HER!"

Carlisle intercepted me and placed one hand on my shoulder to stop me in my tracks, staring at me with brows creased, then turning his gaze towards Bella.

Then, he whispered with pride, "Yes, Edward, I am looking at her, and do you know what I see? I see a vital human girl who is in love with my son, and who my son loves in return with such fierce passion, that it has confounded all that we have known about vampire/human relationships up until now. Can't you see how extraordinary that is?"

"No, Carlisle, I can't," I replied in disagreement as my voice fell away and I whispered in desperation, "It won't be so extraordinary if I cause her any further harm and as long as I'm in her life, sooner or later that is exactly what will happen."

He shook his head slowly, but deliberately as he squeezed my shoulder. "No, Edward. You have done and will always do the right thing to protect her from harm. And if anyone else threatens her, we will be by your side, fighting for her life with you. We will not lose her."

I shrugged away from him and put my head in my hands, groaning in exasperation as my body fell back and rested on the wall. Forever the optimist, Carlisle's words though trying to comfort, only made me feel further guilt. I knew that if I lost Bella now, the hearts of my family would now be broken as well. The weight of all this hung heavily around me, the love they now felt for her threatening to pull me under if I failed. And I knew now, in no uncertain terms, that sooner or later I would disappoint each and every person I held dear.

_Alright, Edward. I know that you are upset, but Renee will be here soon and we still have much to do to smooth things over with Bella's family. You will need to put this aside for now and try to focus on what we need to do here, Edward._

"I brought you some clothes, son. You can't keep walking around covered in blood like that," he rationalised as he pointed towards the set of clothes on the end of the bed.

"I can't leave her," I argued weakly as I sighed and slid down the wall slightly, trying somehow to muster strength from its support.

"I'm not asking you to leave her, Edward. You can use the patient showers down the hall. No-one is awake yet, so you will have some privacy," he countered. "I will stay with Bella until you return."

I reluctantly walked to the end of the bed and took the clothes in my hand, hesitating at the door before I walked out of the room.

_Go now, Edward. Renee will be here any moment. _I turned on my heels and headed down the hall, Bella's heartbeat my only comfort as I opened the door to the patient bathroom.

I stood in the shower, the warmth of the water not offering me any comfort nor any miraculous solutions. I imagined my Bella near me, the soothing water nothing in comparison to the soft, searing burn of her skin. I shivered as I soaped up my body and removed all traces of her blood, and imagined her here with me as I held her in my arms, the water quelling my icy skin as my body pressed against hers.

"Bella," I moaned. "I love you so much...and I am so sorry I hurt you," I agonised as the water dripped down my face as if I was crying true tears. Inside, a torrent raged within as my body shuddered in agony.

I shut off the water and in that same moment, I heard Bella's name in someone's panicked thoughts. _My poor baby! I hope Bella's okay! She worries me so much when she has these accidents! _

I was relieved that I could read the thoughts of at least one member of the Swan family. Perhaps relieved wasn't the word. Perhaps fearful was a more apt description. I dressed quickly and stared at myself in the mirror briefly, letting out a cleansing breath before I opened the bathroom door and tossed the soiled clothes in the nearest waste disposal. I heard the frantic footfalls of Renee drawing nearer as I made haste back to Bella's room. _I'm not staying home...I will stay here...the neighbourhood just isn't safe anymore._

"She's on her way," I whispered as I slipped through the door and stood in the corner of the room, adjacent to Bella's beautiful head.

_Let me handle this, Edward. _

"Of course," I muttered as Carlisle was suddenly at the door, readying himself to greet Bella's mother.

The most beautiful scent of jasmine with a hint of freesia hit my nostrils, and though it was nothing compared to Bella's scent, I could see who she inherited her unique perfume from. She burst through the door and flew to Bella's side, ignoring our presence in the room.

"Oh my God! Bella!" she cried, gasping in shock as her eyes searched her daughter's broken body. Her hands were everywhere at once, touching her lightly as she tried to suppress the desire to take her in her arms and hold her. _Oh dear God! How could this have happened again?_

I watched her carefully, taking in every thought at once as she fawned over her daughter. Physically, Bella was a younger version of the woman who stood at her bedside, her slight build an exact replica of her mother's. Renee's face was the same shape and though aged by her mature years, was still beautiful and filled with an innocent exuberance, even with the duress that she was under now. I continued to gaze at her, watching her every action and nuance as she leant over Bella protectively, and I took in every feature of her and committed it to memory.

Her eyes though smaller were the same colour and shape of her daughter's, and also had a familiar spark within them. Her hair though shorter and cropped closely to her face, was the same reddish-brown colour of Bella's, and shone under the fluorescent light just the same. Her skin though pale, appeared slightly sun-kissed, no doubt from hours of sitting in the bleachers as she watched her husband play ball. I smiled. I was looking at Bella's possible future physical self, though I also knew that emotionally, they were poles apart. Renee's mind was nearly child-like, and in comparison Bella had an old soul lurking within her young body, a knowing being residing within a perfect outer shell.

I found her riveting. She fascinated me! I was so relieved that I could read the mind of at least one of Bella's family at all, as her mind flooded mine with question after question, so much so that I was reeling. I wondered if perhaps Renee would offer me further insight into the woman that I loved so much and now I was being bombarded with them. That concept both frightened and excited me as I watched her care for her only daughter, and she was seemingly at a loss as to what to do, her thoughts constantly shiftling from one place to another.

In an instant I understood why Bella was so mature for her age, and why she adored and protected her mother so much. I could imagine them switching roles very easily, and Bella caring for her mother instead. Ah, if only Renee knew just HOW protective and mothering Bella was of her, Renee's supposed kidnapping the catalyst behind Bella leaving behind her protectors and pursuing James in such a foolhardy manner.

"Why isn't she moving?" she said, articulating her panicked thoughts as they raced through her mind. She finally turned her gaze towards Carlisle, acknowledging his presence, waiting for an answer. _Please...why won't anyone speak? Wake up Bella!_

"Bella is still sedated and will be for probably the next twenty four hours. She will be fine, but she needs to heal," Carlisle said soothingly as he stood near the door, giving Renee a wide berth.

"My poor baby!" she cried, her eyes becoming wet with tears. This was more than I could take and in a human-like manner, I shifted awkwardly from foot to foot, her thoughts of guilt, regret and sadness breaking my heart. _I should never have let her live with Charlie!_

Carlisle took a step forward and introduced himself. "I am Dr Carlisle Cullen. You must be Bella's mother," he said warmly as he smiled, using his best bedside manner_._

She inhaled deeply, her thoughts finally slowing and becoming clearer as she glanced at my father. "Of course, Dr Cullen. Charlie mentioned you when he called. Thank you so much for all you have done for Bella," she said, her eyes darting between me and then back to Carlisle again. She sighed and tried to regain her composure, wiping her streaming tears from her face as she did so. _This must be the boy that Charlie mentioned. Of all the reasons to leave home, why would Bella leave over a crush? _I nearly choked on my own venom in response to her thoughts, but my expression remained serene. Ah, if this were only just a silly high school crush!

"You are more than welcome," he replied as Renee turned toward him and stepped away from the bed, her thoughts now focusing on the introductions.

"And call me Renee, please," she said informally as she went to reach out to hug Carlisle, but thought better of it once she neared him. Her natural instinct to flee was there, but there was more. She seemed nearly fascinated by us, and not repelled by us as much as many humans were. I now realised that mother and daughter shared other traits between them besides a similar scent and physical appearance. _Oh, that was a little awkward...there is something strange about him...but so handsome!_

"Certainly, Renee. And you must call me Carlisle," he insisted as he tried to ignore Renee's reaction. I cleared my throat, trying to prompt Carlisle to introduce us as there was an awkward pause, causing Renee to feel a sense of discomfort. She was not alone.

"Yes, well I wish we'd met under different circumstances," she said finally with regret, her quizzical stare unable to be repressed. Curiosity around our kind was never a good thing, especially since her daughter had already seen through our facade.

"And this is my son, Edward," Carlisle said finally as he pointed toward me.

_Son? But he is so young looking to have a grown boy... _"A pleasure to meet you," I said softly as I tilted my head toward her respectfully, but at the same time still leant away from her and tried to keep my distance.

_Hmmm...he seems to be so angry, so serious...so sad. Of course he is...Bella is so hurt! That girl will be the death of me! _Her random thoughts swirled around her head once more, and I wished that Jasper were here to use his talents on her. She took a deep breath and cleared her throat before she spoke.

"Yes...it's nice to meet you. Please, call me Renee as well, Edward," she sniffed as she moved in closer, smiling nervously at me through her sadness. Her eyes roamed my face and were suddenly wiser as they took me in, and she let out a little gasp. _He cares for her...that's what it is. Oh my! I will have to keep my eye on this one...Bella is too young to be this serious about a boy. _

Though her thoughts were child-like, they certainly were perceptive in their innocence. Yet again, to my frustration, she shared something of a common trait with her daughter. I realised that we would need to be careful when around this particular woman.

_Oh, what the hell! _Before I could react in a human manner to what she was about to do, she took a step forward and reached out toward me and wrapped her arms around me, giving me a gentle hug. Her embrace felt oddly comforting, and I briefly pictured those arms being that of my real mother, Elizabeth, as she held me. I felt my lips curve into an awkward smile as she held me to her chest even tighter, the shock and surprise of Renee's response to me heartening to say the least. Carlisle smiled outwardly, though inwardly he was astonished by her response. I lightly touched her shoulder in return, trying to respond as humanly as possibly while at the same time attempting to hide from her what I truly was.

_Oh my...careful Edward. She does have a hint of Bella's scent, and she seems wary of us. _I stared over her shoulder and nodded once at Carlisle in acknowledgement of his thoughts, Renee's scent not even causing a sting within my throat in comparison to the girl who lay in the hospital bed next to us.

She stepped back and looked at me, her eyes wide with shock and confusion. _Oh, he is so...buff! He must work out every day. And so handsome...though I can't quite put my finger on it...those eyes are just so unusual...mesmerising even. And that aftershave! I will have to ask where...where... _Her eyes suddenly glazed over as they locked with mine, and I knew that she was helplessly under my influence.

Carlisle hastily stood between us as I tore my gaze from hers, both of us trying to break the trance that I had over Renee. "Can I get you anything, Renee? Perhaps I could take you to the cafeteria and buy you some breakfast while we wait for Bella's treating doctor to arrive," he suggested, his eyes darting between us both.

"What...?" she said as Carlisle placed his hand gently on her arm, pulling her out of her reverie. "Oh, yes of course. Bella won't be waking yet will she?" _Oh my...what was that?_

"No, not for a while yet. When Dr. Grainger arrives, he will be able to fill you in on Bella's course of treatment. Shall we go?" he asked as he indicated towards the door.

"I will stay with Bella, you go and get some breakfast Renee," I offered. She glanced at me, her eyes wary. _Oh stop that Renee...Carlisle saved her...she will be safe here._

"Don't worry Renee. Edward will take good care of Bella. Our family has become quite attached to your daughter and we consider her a part of our family," Carlisle assured her. "You will probably get to meet Alice later, who has also become quite fond of Bella. She will be here with Charlie later after she picks him up from the airport."

She turned to look at Bella, her eyes loving but filled with concern, and leant in and kissed her on her cheek. "I will be back soon Bella, you get some rest honey." She glanced towards me, and then began to walk slowly towards the door, turning to look at her daughter once more, lingering just outside the room as Carlisle showed her out. I gave her an assured smile as she left, trying to convey that all was well as I pulled in the plastic chair and sat by the bed. I took Bella's warm hand in mine and stroked it lovingly, Renee gasping in response to that final image as the door closed behind them. _This is worse than I thought...he loves her!_


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Thank you all so much for sticking with this story.**

**This chapter is dedicated to Michaela...thanks for your fun times and support! To Jen: All the best with your upcoming venture...I know you will do so very well! Love you both!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its subsidiaries...I just like to manipulate them to do my bidding MWAHAHAHAHAHAH!**

Never in my life would I have expected that my feelings would be so transparent, so...human. Renee's thought processes had surprised me, and her response to me had done nothing short of shock me to the core. Was I that obvious? That vulnerable? That...human? It gave me pause to think. Was I endangering not only Bella, but her family by becoming too close to them, giving them ample opportunity to reveal my family's secret and potentially risking their lives? As much as I longed to be loved and accepted by Bella's parents, should I put them in harm's way to achieve that?

As I heard the distant, mournful mutterings and thoughts of the occupants of this place, I watched as the room lightened, the brilliance of the sun outside the closed blinds seeping through and reminding me of what I was. I would need to tread very carefully in this place in more ways than one, staying indoors and avoiding further close contact with Renee. She perceived too much already, her child-like mind offering her all sorts of possibilities in explanation to me and my family. That could be the very cause of her downfall, and I could never live with that.

I sat there in silence, mentally preparing for the arrival of Charlie Swan. I knew that he would see me in anything but a good light. I had, after all, nearly caused the demise of his daughter, and though he did not know the facts behind that simple truth, it was the awful truth nonetheless. Causing disaster for everyone whose lives I touched seemed to be becoming a habit of mine...so much so that I had turned it into some sort of depraved art form. What the hell was wrong with me?

Morose thoughts overwhelmed me as I imagined each and every one of Bella's family dead and buried before their time, all because of their association with me. "Bella, I don't know what to do...please come back and talk to me! I need you so much my love," I murmured, watching as her chest rose and fell in rhythm with the blips of the machinery that surrounded her, the glow of the increasing light in the room making her skin appear pearlescent. Even in a state of helplessness, she was still beautiful.

At that moment I heard the muffled thoughts and familiar heavy steps of Charlie Swan, and could just imagine Alice trying her best to pretend to keep up with him. He was approaching, and approaching fast. I inhaled deeply, preparing myself for his wrath, his thoughts angered and filled with panic.

_Edward Cullen...you stop that! You know I can't bring Jasper here with all the blood in this place, so listen to me. We're on our way and I'd appreciate you trying to put a smile on that sour puss of yours and remain calm!_

I sighed and forced a smile in response, that sister of mine always trying to bring me in to line. As interfering as she sometimes was, there were times such as now where I welcomed that interference more than anything.

"Charlie has arrived, my love," I whispered to Bella as I gently leaned in and kissed her brow, the heat of her delicate skin incredible. No matter how much contact I had with her, I always craved more, its surface reminding me of the softest and most delicate velvet. She was literally and figuratively my soft place to fall in this cold, cruel world, that fact I knew without a shadow of doubt no matter what the outcome of things would be beyond today.

I stood to my feet and took my place in the corner to allow Charlie to be near his daughter as he entered the room. The anger seeping from him was so thick, that I felt he was mentally screaming at me, his face contorted in pain as he opened the door and rushed to her side. "Bella!" he cried as he rush to her side and hesitantly hovered over her face, the creases in his face deep with worry. Alice followed quietly behind and stood against the wall, right near the door.

_Careful, Edward. He's out for blood! After I saw how upset he was in a vision, I called him after Carlisle spoke to him. I've been talking to him, trying to smooth things over since but he's still very upset with you. I even called Renee to see if she could talk some sense into him as well. _

I saw a vision in Alice's mind of Charlie throwing a punch at me here in the hospital after I had lost my temper, causing him to break his hand and wrist. Then the vision flashed forward to Bella crying in her room after Charlie had forbade her to see me again, his arm in plaster, after which it flashed to Carlisle telling me that we would be moving away. I could not allow that vision to come to fruition, and though this was going to take some work, I had to change its outcome.

I nodded once towards her, silently thanking her for her warning, although I was already well aware of his demeanour. I watched closely and waited for Charlie to rationalise what was happening, keeping quiet as his amplified emotions rolled off him, oozing from every pore as his scent became even stronger than usual...the anger seemingly pushing it forth. I felt my body recoil in response to his ire...waiting for the oncoming onslaught.

"You!" he screamed in accusation as he stepped back from the bed and whirled around. "How could you allow this to happen to her?"

My mouth hung open...I was momentarily taken aback. I was at a loss for words, and though I could not have agreed with him more, I was still unable to speak for a moment as I felt an inexplicable stirring coming from within. I focused everything I had on remaining calm, my expression, I hoped, serene.

_Edward, just stay calm and listen to him. Carlisle and Renee are with the Doctor and will be here in a few minutes. Let him rant, but DON'T get upset!_

Charlie took two steps towards me, his face red with fury. "Well? Are you going to answer me?" he yelled. "You promised me you would look after her! How is THIS looking after her? WELL?" he spat as his darkened eyes bulged out of their sockets.

I inhaled and tried to get my bearings, his pounding heart and rapid breathing telling me he was swamped with adrenalin and ready for battle. This was one time that I wish Jasper were here. And where was Carlisle?

"I-I'm so sorry, sir," I said as I attempted to ignore his verbal attack, all the while feeling my sensibilities beginning to unravel. I deserved every little bit of what I was receiving now, but still needed to muster the strength to remain on an even keel before my natural instinct to attack kicked in.

"Sorry? Is that all you can say?" he questioned harshly, his fists now clenched as he stood mere inches away from me. "I'd like nothing more than to knock some sense into your head, Edward Cullen," he seethed, his jaw clenched as he ground his teeth together.

_Edward, he's looking for someone to blame...just let him vent._

Against my better judgement, I ignored Alice's thoughts, training my gaze on the man who stood before me. Though it was wrong, the anger began to boil from within anyway. God, I hated being this weak!

He sensed my emotions, and I knew that more than anything. His body was now taut, ready for a fight in response to my clenched stance. He wanted an excuse to hit me...to make me pay for her life nearly being taken away. He glared at me, searching my face for any signs of a response, rocking back on his heels as he braced himself for anything. "What? You want a piece of me? Go ahead, give it your best shot!" he yelled as he pointed to his jaw, his face tomato red as he goaded me to hit him. My fists clenched in response and my eyes narrowed as if I had no control of how my body responded. What was I DOING?

_Edward...PLEASE stay calm!_ _We will work on getting you back in his good graces later!_

"Charlie, Edward, please try to remain calm," Alice whispered, the vision flickering in her mind. I could do this. I had no choice. And yet...

I inhaled deeply and focused, trying to think rationally. The man standing before was a human...A HUMAN! He was not some vampire threatening me...he was the father of the woman I loved!

"You want ME to be calm after what has happened, Alice?" Charlie accused as he glared briefly at my sister. "You don't understand! Bella is the only family I have!" he yelped in a high pitched tone as he turned back to me once more. I let out a small growl in response and quickly glanced toward Alice, silently apologising to her for having been subjected to this. My anger threatened to burst forth as my eyes locked with his, his tirade directed toward Alice only angering me further. Alice begged me with her eyes not to attack. _You can do this Edward._

_Edward, we're on our way. Do not react to his emotions. We have the doctor with us as well so you must keep yourself under control._

I exhaled as I realised Carlisle was close, trying to release my pent-up rage. I just needed to wait. The vision only had Alice and me in the room with Charlie. I could do this. Just a few moments more...I was begging for my mind and body to co-operate. Pleading with it, in fact.

Then, he was breathing heavily, his hot breath rushing across my face as he took another step forward, his mind and body relentless in provoking a response from me. "You listen here, Edward Cullen," he said, poking me several times in the chest, his eyes widening as he did so. Though I sensed he realised there was something odd about my skin, he remained determined in his quest. "I will not stand by and have you hurt Bella in any way, and if you set foot through my door...I won't be held responsible for what I might do!"

I stared at his hand, trying to stop myself from grasping it. Something inside me snapped, as I realised that he was in fact telling me I could no longer see his daughter, and though I was considering that very option, NO-ONE except Bella or I had the right to make that decision. My body vibrated in anger, and a louder growl emanated from deep within my chest as I crouched slightly. He took a small step forward, his eyes now filled with arrogance. He was not about to back down. I had never come across a human response such as this, and had no idea how to deal with it. My thoughts scrambled momentarily as I tried with all my will to repress my instincts.

_EDWARD! SNAP OUT OF IT! _

Alice caught my sight, staring me down in challenge, enough to regain some semblance of rationale. Of course, she was right. I was behaving like a two year old, and though I knew that, here I stood...challenging him.

Carlisle then burst through the door, his face filled with urgency, providing me with a more than welcome distraction. Dr Grainger and Renee followed closely behind. "Charlie," Carlisle said softly, suddenly standing between the two of us. Renee and the doctor stood back, Renee's mouth gaping open in shock as she took in Charlie's stance. _Charlie Swan! _

"Let's just try to talk this through calmly," Carlisle added.

Charlie continued to stare at me, seething, his eyes suddenly blinking as he realised that there were more people occupying the small space of the room to bear witness to his behaviour. "Sir, you don't want me to call security, do you?" Dr Grainger snapped. "And young man, I do understand that you are distraught by Miss Swan's predicament, but you must cease and desist this aggressive behaviour if you wish to remain by her bedside," he added, standing at the end of the bed, staring through his withered eyes at the both of us as he casually picked up Bella's chart. I continued to stare Charlie down, as he did me, though his challenge was beginning to waver as I noticed his eyes soften and his posture shift to a more defensive stance.

"That won't be necessary, will it Charlie?" Renee chimed in. She strode over confidently and stood between the two of us, her eyes flickering from side to side as she took in our tenor and gently placed her hand on Charlie's shoulder. _Please Charlie, just calm down...don't do this. Bella needs us! _"Charlie Swan, you listen to me. We have to be here for Bella, and no matter what, these good people are not to blame for her being here. They've HELPED her!" she said, squeezing his shoulder. "So stop being such an ass and just calm down before you get us all thrown out!" she squealed, her words rolling off her tongue with rapidity.

Renee's words snapped me to, as if I'd been knocked out and she had brought the smelling salts, and not a moment too soon. What was I doing allowing this poor man to provoke me? Of course he had every right to be angry with me, and I had NO right to return the favour. If she were my daughter, I would react in the exact same manner. Charlie flinched under her touch and words and briefly closed his eyes as he also tried to muster self-control. The worst was over, I hoped. My body relaxed infinitesimally, enough that all in the room sensed that we had both regained our self-control.

Alice smiled, her vision shifting as I saw Charlie uninjured and receiving a phone call to take him back to Forks before Bella's arrival home. _I think you're still going to have a little trouble convincing him Edward, but we will work on bringing him around. You may have to just visit without him knowing for a little while. _She winked at me and her lips curved into a wicked smile, realising that I had been inadvertently bullied by Charlie to stay with Bella. That was how I felt now, after what he had said, but I still remained undecided. I needed to consider the best option for Bella's benefit, and not what would benefit my family or myself. As my internal battle raged on within, the vision began to flicker and Alice's face turned serious once more. I shrugged my shoulders, letting her know that I still had not decided what to do, the pendulum swinging both ways within my mind, ever-changing from moment to moment.

With all the commotion, the blips on the machine began to increase, as if Bella was somehow aware of the goings-on between her loved ones, her heart seemingly thudding in protest of our irrational behaviour. Charlie stepped back and stood guardedly between Bella and me, and stared at her concernedly once more. "I'm sorry Bella," he murmured knowingly.

Dr. Grainger stepped forward and said sensibly, "I think that Miss Swan requires another twenty-four hours of sedation." _I hope things will calm down now. This family does seem a little highly strung._

"And will she be here for much longer?" Charlie asked in near desperation, the anger still rolling off him as he cleared his throat.

"I will assess that once she wakes. Her leg will be in plaster for the next four to six weeks and she will require some physiotherapy afterwards, but Miss Swan should be fine to go home in a day or two, depending on how well she comes out of the sedation, among other considerations."

"Thank you Dr. Grainger," Renee said sweetly as she smiled at him, breathing a sigh of relief. _God, that was embarrassing! Why does Charlie always have to behave like this when it comes to Bella? _

"I think that perhaps some of you should go and get some fresh air or a coffee. I don't think it's such a good idea for you all to be in this room at once," Dr. Grainger said as he eyeballed me, the tension still crackling within the small space of the room.

_Oh, alright Edward. I'll rescue you._

"I have to get back to Jasper and Emmett. You know how they get when they get left alone with nothing to do," Alice said as she rolled her eyes. "Charlie, Renee, would either of you like to come and stay with us while you wait for Bella to wake up?" she offered, trying to empty the room as much as possible.

Renee shook her head vehemently and said, "No thank you Alice. I intend to stay here until Bella wakes. Besides, my neighbourhood is a little dangerous at the moment. Someone set fire to the ballet studio and left a stolen car there, so I have no intention of staying at the house on my own!"

"Charlie?" Alice asked, her expression smooth and unresponsive to Renee's comment.

He looked around the room, the crowd appearing to overwhelm him, no doubt the presence of me and my family making him feel somewhat outnumbered. As much as he wanted to be with Bella, if Renee was staying I sensed that he was prepared to concede and allow her to do just that. "Yes well, I may take you up on that, Alice. I didn't exactly arrange for anywhere to stay," he mumbled awkwardly as he cleared his throat, briefly glancing toward me once more. I flashed him a grin, but I knew straight away it came out wrong with Alice's thoughts. _Edward, play nice! Or I will get Carlisle to drag you back to the hotel and lock you in a room with Charlie!_

I nodded in concession, refraining from childishly poking my tongue out at Alice. _Besides, Charlie will be called back soon, and I can take him straight to the airport from the hotel. _I stared at Alice with a look of concern, however her vision did not show anything further.

"Dr. Grainger, thank you for your assistance. I hope that you can visit Bella and assess her for release tomorrow after she wakes," Carlisle said evenly. "I will be happy to oversee her transportation home and ongoing care after we arrive."

"Yes, of course, Dr. Cullen," he replied, smiling admiringly at him. "If you are willing to do that, we will try to expedite Miss Swan's release as soon as possible."

"Thank you, Doctor," Charlie interjected as he walked towards him and shook his hand. "And sorry," he said, blushing as he darted his gaze at me once more, and though his anger was still present, I also felt a sense of remorse emanate from him as well. I, too, felt regretful of my errant behaviour.

Alice opened the door and exited, waiting just outside the door for Charlie to follow. He hesitated and stared at his ex-wife. "Renee, how about you join us for a coffee before I go, I'd like to talk to you," he said as he pursed his lips at me.

_Oh, my. I wonder what this is all about. _Renee's thoughts were of concern and confusion, her wary response causing Alice to speak up.

"That's a great idea, Charlie," Alice said. "How about I meet you at the cafeteria in a half hour? I need to go freshen up and call Jasper," she suggested, no doubt to give Bella's parents some time alone. I was sure that Charlie wanted to discuss where Bella was to live now. My fists clenched, the huge ball in the pit of my stomach making yet another appearance.

"Sure Alice. And thanks. Renee?" he asked, giving her a smile.

Renee smiled at him in return, and tried to reassure herself that all would be well. _I'm sure it's fine. Besides, I want to talk to him about Edward and tell him about Phil's contract. _I stood there, still unable to speak, listening to everyone's thoughts as I tried to keep up my human facade and suppress my overwhelmingly negative feelings. I felt I was failing miserably, attracting the stares of disapproval from everyone in the room, including those of my own family from time to time. "Sure, Charlie. Besides, I bet they didn't feed you on the plane. You look as though you need some breakfast. How about I buy you some eggs?" she offered sweetly, her smile widening.

Embarrassed by Renee's attention, Charlie huffed wordlessly in agreement and allowed Renee to exit, following closely behind her. Alice herded them away from the room and abruptly closed the door behind her. I sighed heavily, thankful that I'd made it through the onslaught that was Charlie, and more than grateful to Alice for her intervention.

_Son, you must learn to control yourself around Charlie. We can't leave anything to chance and you nearly..._

"I know, Carlisle," I muttered under my breath in reply.

"I will return tomorrow to check on Miss Swan where we can look at withdrawing her sedation," Dr Grainger said as he watched the interaction between Carlisle and I, his mouth gaping. _Oh goodness, this young man is nothing like his father. Such attitude!_

I could not even be bothered with refuting his thoughts, and just sighed once more as I realised that I was wearing my heart on my sleeve more than I ever thought possible. I found it incredible that my emotions had become so human, their ever-evolving course doing nothing but repeatedly surprising me.

"Carlisle, Alice just told me Charlie will be called back to Forks at any time. Do you think he will mind us bringing Bella home?" I asked.

"I will talk to him before he leaves, and if I promise to accompany you home, I do not see that as a problem. Hmmm...I wonder what would call him back to Forks so urgently?" he mused as he placed his thumb and forefinger on his chin. It mattered not. I was just so relieved that Charlie Swan was going home, and that the imminent danger of our family having to leave Forks had been averted...for now. Besides, I really did not want to argue with him here, with Bella being so unwell.

Suddenly, I heard Alice approach the room, her quickened steps indicating that she was in rather a hurry, her thoughts whirling around the latest vision. In a matter of seconds, she was at the door. "Victoria has hunted and killed three hikers!" she hissed, her face shocked as she closed the door to the room. At least we knew why Chief Swan would be called home now. A brief moment of sadness overwhelmed me, followed closely by anger.

"VICTORIA!" I seethed, clenching my fists in defiance. When would this nightmare ever end?

Just as she spoke, Carlisle's phone rang. "Oh Carlisle!" Esme cried in a broken voice, as though she had been sobbing. "We've just found three human bodies after following Victoria's scent north of the house!"

"Is Victoria still in the vicinity?" he asked in his usual calm manner, breathing a heavy sigh as he heard her voice.

"I don't think so. We've just chased her away after finding the bodies. We couldn't stop her Carlisle! She didn't even feed from them all...she just KILLED them in cold blood!" Esme said in a high pitched tone, sounding as though she was on the verge of becoming hysterical. I knew one thing. Victoria wanted revenge and took it out on those poor hikers...and I was to blame for this travesty. My heart sank.

"It will be alright my love. I will arrange to be home as soon as possible," Carlisle said soothingly as he hung up, his thoughts urgent to the point of desperation. He needed to be with Esme now. I could not blame him. I knew that Carlisle needed to protect the life of his mate as well as cover the tracks of a vampire who was hunting too conspicuously. "Alice, you need to stay here while we arrange to fly home immediately. I am also going to leave it up to you both to arrange for Bella's arrival home. We cannot risk any further killings occurring in Forks."

"Of course," I answered, my pained stare directed toward my father. He was worried. Very worried. And though he could not read my thoughts, he picked up on my feelings with great accuracy once more.

"Edward, not now," he said simply. "We must focus on what has to be done."

"Fine!" I grunted.

At the exact same moment, I heard Charlie's heavy footfalls approach with speed, his thoughts filled with panic and urgency. He had heard the news. "Carlisle," he said, his voice faltering as he burst through the door and stood at the foot of Bella's bed. "I've just been called back to town. We have a situation with three dead hikers."

Carlisle stared at him, his false look of surprise more than convincing. "That is terrible news. Is there anything I can do to assist?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact there is," he replied, his brow wrinkled with genuine concern. "We believe the hikers were attacked by some sort of wild animal. If you wouldn't mind Carlisle, I'd appreciate your help since you've had previous experience with animal attack victims."

"Of course, Charlie. Emmett and Jasper were intending to return to Forks today anyway, and so perhaps Alice and Edward could accompany Bella home when she is well enough to travel, if that is alright with you," he suggested.

I knew he would not like it, but under the circumstances he had no choice in the matter. Bella was in no condition to be released from this hospital yet, let alone travel home.

"And don't forget that Renee will be here for Bella. She will be more than well taken care of," he added, trying to convince Charlie that we could be trusted to care for Bella, and that Renee would also remain a presence here in this hospital room.

"I...don't know..." he said as he stared at me with narrowed eyes, then flickered back toward Alice and Carlisle.

"Charlie, Renee and I will make sure that Edward behaves himself," she assured him with confidence. Charlie let out a little sigh in response, no doubt due to the realisation that Renee would be hovering by Bella's bedside...and also that he had no alternative but to agree.

Charlie brushed past Carlisle and approached me, his tenor protective but also filled with a sense of urgency as he prepared to face what was now waiting for him back home. "I can see I have no choice, and Edward, it's been pointed out to me that I was a little out of line before. Sorry about that," he admitted.

"No, it is I who should be apologising, sir," I answered, realising that no truer words could escape my lips.

"Hmmm," he said, staring at me with a sense of suspicion, still trying to work me out as he meticulously studied my expression. Alice smiled. She knew he was about to reconsider his position. "Let's just leave it at that. But my earlier statement still stands. I think that you should stay away from Bella for a while, at least until she's fully recovered," he said, conceding somewhat from his earlier threat. "After all, she did run away because of you, so from now on, there will be rules and a strict curfew to abide by if you wish to continue seeing my daughter."

I nodded in agreement, a sense of relief washing through me. I could live with a curfew, that is, if I was going to remain in Bella's life at all, the pendulum within my heart continuing to swing back and forth. "Of course, anything you say, sir," I whispered with sincerity, his hardened eyes still trying to read my expression.

"And before I go, just know this. You hurt my daughter again, and you will NEVER get a second chance," he warned.

"Of course, sir, I understand," I answered as I dipped my head low, staring shamefully at the floor. Oh, if only he knew the battle raging on within me!

Then, he turned to face Carlisle, his expression immediately softening. "Thanks for looking after her, Carlisle," he said, clearing his throat as he spoke, his discomfort obvious but his tenor sincere. Carlisle smiled in return. "I guess we'd best head for the airport," Charlie mumbled further.

"No need to thank me Charlie. We will circle back and collect Emmett and Jasper, and head straight for the airport and catch the next available flight. Alice, please ensure that Renee knows of our plans, and then inform Dr. Grainger that we had to depart on urgent police business."

"Sure, no problem, Carlisle," she replied, smiling as she glanced toward me. _Don't worry Edward. I'll keep clear of here so you can have some alone time with Bella after I talk to Renee and Dr. Grainger, but just so you know, I asked Renee if she wanted to stay with me at the hotel again and she wasn't interested. Looks like you'll have some company, Edward, but I will try to run some interference whenever I can. _

Charlie said one last thing before they turned to leave the room. "I think that it would be best if we kept this from Bella. She has to focus on her recovery," he said sensibly, cocking his brow directly at me, his tenor of embarrassment mirroring my own feelings.

"Of course, I understand sir," I replied softly, nodding once in agreement. Alice and Carlisle also nodded in agreement with Charlie's suggestion, our families united in the protection of the one person that bound us all. Our Bella. She would need every ounce of her strength to endure what was to come, no matter what decision I took now.

"Don't worry Charlie. I'll find Renee and let her know. We want Bella to get well as quickly as possible," Alice whispered as she smiled brightly at him.

"Thanks Alice," he said as he gave her a half smile in return, the worries of the world pressing down on his human shoulders. That smile was immediately gone from his face when he took another look at me, then leant in and kissed his daughter gently on the cheek, murmuring, "See you at home, Bells."

I watched them all as one by one they filed out of the room, and then turned toward my Bella, taking her soft hand in mine as I sat on the plastic chair once more. I sighed as I felt her blood pump through her veins, her glorious scent slowly but surely beginning to return, my thoughts at a total and complete loss. The family had finally left me alone...left me to contemplate what to do next...Bella Swan's fate and the fate of mine and my family resting firmly on the decision I would now have to make...the pendulum swinging back and forth, back and forth...


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: I can't believe that this story is coming to a close...I'm really going to miss this so very much! I would like to take this opportunity to give a shout out to all of my faithful reviewers and thank you for sticking with my story and consistently reviewing! Thanks to: Totteacher, Mouse555, NCCullenlover0613, TwilightBella-C, FYInichole, deanie, dazzleglo, jia225, secretlamour, amazone3, breakingaurora, Cullenslivehere, ellieover, for the love of cullens, twilightprincess45, twifantasyfan, ellieover, (love that name lol), animal8, fairusa, Lisa12345, Unknowngirl, Sammomo, Charlizzle, molesmt, Teamemmette, Lovinglady! If I've forgotten anyone I do apologise, it's a lot of reviews to go through and get names from!**

**Disclaimer: I don't claim to own Twilight or have any rights to the story.**

EPOV

The day passed uneventfully, but in a glimmer, flashes of time passing quickly and slowly as if I was in an alternate universe. Time. I had an unending supply of it. The woman who lay before me, weak and helpless, did not. Time was doing its best to play its trickery on me. I longed for Bella to wake in some ways, but in others I dreaded it...fearing that when she did all would be lost. Oh, how selfish I was to have put her through what I had. I was a walking time bomb, ticking away, ready to explode at any given moment, the fallout destroying all those around me. Those who did not deserve to be destroyed, but to be loved, revered and kept safe...far away from the likes of me.

Bella's body lay there in state, as if she were already gone, and I had been the one who put her there. It was an image I should best get used to. The only thing that differentiated me from a murderous thug was that I was not meant to be here. I was a walking anachronism whose time was already gone, and if I were human, she would not be here. I WAS THE ONE THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD, NOT HER!

I clung onto her heartbeat, so full of life, which was the source of everything I had held in mine. I needed her so much, and yet I despised myself for allowing this very situation to occur, the pendulum swinging back and forth...back and forth. What was I to do? Was nothing in this so-called life ever simple? No-one, not even Carlisle, could offer me further guidance now. I would need to wage this internal battle alone...and face the possibility of spending the rest of eternity loveless and bereft of life. I wanted the best for her, and the best was for me to leave her be. But, did I have the fortitude to follow through and do the right thing?

Renee kept coming in to see Bella, but then would leave again, her thoughts of her daughter confused and frightened. Alice did much to alleviate the tension that Renee felt, taking her to lunch at the cafeteria then offering to drive her to the house. Renee baulked at visiting her home, but eventually Alice had her convinced to at least drive past and check on the place to make sure it was secure. That gave me a little breathing room during the day, Renee's thoughts becoming frustrated with my constant presence in the room. I didn't care. I could not leave Bella Swan any more than I could stop myself from loving her. Loving. Her. What a fool I was! Loving her was the most fatal mistake I had ever made...fatal not only to Bella, but to every frail human whose lives I had now pervaded. I was nothing but poison...an insipid disease tainting everything I touched, making it impure...altering it forever.

I did not move an inch, keeping my vigil at Bella's bedside throughout the day, pondering what to do. As I looked at her, everything inside me contradicted itself. I hated what I had done so much, but craved to be near her at all costs. I was still no closer to deciding anything. Day finally turned into night, and for that I was thankful...time seemingly becoming even and constant. That meant that I was all the more closer to hearing the sound of my love's voice once more. I craved her honeyed voice, longed for her beautiful brown eyes to open and give me that stare that I loved...one that saw right through all my pretences, breaking down my every barrier. But most of all I desired her touch. The feeling of her skin on mine as she touched me with as much desire as I felt for her was something I was now grieving the loss of.

My only salvation through this entire ordeal was her mesmerising heartbeat and her scent, and although it pleased me to hear that beautiful sound and smell that one of a kind perfume, I needed more...so much more. I hoped that she would return to me and all would be back to normal...well as normal as could be expected in my world. But once that happened...then what? Would that herald in a new phase...one which meant I would have to let her go?

Renee arrived back at the hospital, thanking Alice for all she had done, but determined to stay the night with Bella after Alice had managed to keep her away for most of the afternoon. She had spoken to Phil, while pacing the hall outside Bella's room, and I knew that they had decided to settle in Jacksonville. I wondered if Phil's posting to another town was a sign? Perhaps it was. Perhaps the universe was somehow trying to tell me to let Bella go...pushing me, in fact. Renee was so very excited about the move, and was more than looking forward to Bella moving there with them. Perhaps the decision of whether Bella should remain with me would not be mine to make. My heart began to ache at that very thought...the pendulum now having a sharp blade on the end of it, swinging closer and closer still to my heart.

The nurses kindly arranged for a recliner to be placed in the room, so that Renee could be with Bella in relative comfort. This was going to be awkward. I decided to give Renee some space and some time alone with Bella for a time, at least until she fell asleep. I did not relish talking with her at length, less she discover a little more about me than I felt comfortable with, and she was, after all, Bella's mother. A mother who loved and cared for her daughter a great deal and who was responsible for creating the woman I loved. The doctor had visited once more, and I decided to give him a wide berth as he told Renee that tomorrow would be the day that Bella would be taken off her sedation...the path to my destiny now nearing one step closer.

I took the opportunity to call Carlisle to tell him the news, who had arrived home and reported that Victoria was long gone, but not before having killed some out of town hikers from Seattle. I wondered if she actually realised that James was gone. Perhaps that was why she had committed such a heinous act, or perhaps she was merely bored and frustrated, resentful of her companion abandoning her. Who knew what would be going through the mind of such a feral vampire? I shuddered to think what EXACTLY was going on in that mind of hers, and knew that the family would have to remain ever-vigilant if she decided to return to Forks in the future.

Carlisle also told me that he also had words with Charlie while they worked on the investigation, which was thankfully open and shut, and that he had calmed somewhat and was looking forward to having Bella back home. Charlie had, however, also reiterated to Carlisle that strict rules would now apply if I wanted to continue to see his daughter. My heart lurched in the sudden realisation that Charlie Swan may also have to say goodbye to his only daughter, when he had barely had the opportunity to get to know her once more. There again was another fine example of how I had managed to destroy lives, leaving nothing but disaster in my wake. After my somewhat informative phone call, I paced the quiet halls, visiting hours and dinner time now over...peace reigning in this cursed place. Alice was back at the hotel, giving me much needed space, and for that, I was more than grateful. Now all I had to do was deal with tonight...wait for Renee to fall asleep...and wait for Bella to open her beautiful eyes.

As I approached the room, I heard Renee's thoughts as she fussed over her daughter. They were all over the place, but mostly filled with excitement and tinged with anxiety. She could not wait to talk to her daughter face to face and inform her of her plans, and who could blame her? She was Bella's mother and had every right to ask her to return home with her, and I had no right to prevent that very thing occurring.

I knocked gently on the door, and Renee answered softly, "Come in." _I was so hoping that he would go back to the hotel with Alice! Oh well..._

"How is she?" I asked, knowing the answer, but asking anyway to make idle conversation.

"The same. They will be taking her off sedation tomorrow, so that's good, but they don't know how long it will be before she wakes up," she said, sighing, squirming in the plastic seat. I knew I made her feel uncomfortable, my presence here being a constant irritant...a reminder that her daughter had found a life in Forks. A life that, perhaps, she could not see herself satisfied with whilst married to Charlie. A life that may be difficult for her to convince Bella to leave behind.

"Your sister Alice is very nice," she said genuinely as I stood at the end of the bed.

"She is," I answered, watching her with trepidation, nervously forcing a smile from my lips.

"Are you close with your...siblings?" she asked, Alice obviously having filled Renee in on the details of our unusual family situation.

"Each and every one of them," I replied matter-of-factly, my smile disappearing as I waited for her to begin her interrogation.

"Oh, that's nice," she said in a whisper, her thoughts refuting her words. She really did not know what to make of me. _Strange boy...good looking, but strange. I just can't work him out..._

"So tell me Edward. Have you and Bella known each other long?" she asked, her eyebrow arched just like her daughter's, trying to subtly launch to the inevitable tirade of questions that I knew were whirling inside her mind.

"A while," I answered vaguely. "We've been lab partners in biology, so..." I added casually, trying to lay blame on the school's ridiculous scheduling of classes on the fact that I had even met her daughter in the first place.

"So you just have class with her? Seems that it's a little more than that," she said, glancing between Bella and I as if she could physically see the unbreakable bond between our bodies.

"Well, yes it has become more," I muttered, lowering my head and counting the scuff marks on the linoleum floor.

_I was right! She's too young to be this involved! The family is nice enough, but this boy? At her age?_

She sighed once more, this time in frustration, her intuition all over the place...which I was certain was unchartered territory for her. I would need to distract her, make her feel more comfortable, and by doing this make myself feel comfortable at the same time.

"So, are you enjoying Florida?" I asked, trying to stop her interrogation in its tracks before the questions became more awkward than they already were. She seemed relieved by the change in subject.

"What? Oh, yes," she replied. "The weather is beautiful, sunshine all the time," she said, enthused. She did not, however, mention her plans to have Bella come home with her.

For the next half hour, we discussed the Floridian weather in detail, and the fact that Forks did not hold a candle to such wonderful weather patterns. I could not argue that point with her at all, and her conversation was charming to the point that we laughed at one juncture in the conversation. She was very warm and friendly, and loved Bella so very much, but I could not help but feel a sense of discomfort by the fact that she seemed to somewhat see through my facade and that she withheld her intentions from me. I couldn't blame her. She did not know me from Adam, and saw me as a threat to her getting Bella to return home with her.

"So are you going back to the hotel tonight?" she asked, wanting more than anything to push me out of the room. I decided to give her what she wanted, well to a point, to appease her. I would return once she was asleep in the turquoise faux leather chair that sat at the foot of Bella's bed...Renee's bed for the night...and watch the sun rise as they slept.

"Yes, I think I need to go back and clean up," I replied. "Would you like to accompany me and perhaps get some sleep in a comfortable bed?" I offered, knowing that she had no intentions of moving from this room.

"No, thank you," she whispered, her eyes scanning Bella's body once more as it lay there still and unmoving. She had not even brought a change of clothes, but I knew that it did not matter. Renee was intending to remain here no matter what.

I went into the hall briefly, turning into a room that had a sink and next to it a stack of freshly washed white cotton blankets. I took some in my hand and re-entered the room, offering them to her. "Here, you might need these," I said softly. "I will see you tomorrow. Goodnight, Renee," I added, walking through the door and closing it shut behind me.

"Night," she added after I had travelled halfway down the hall, sighing heavily in response to my welcome departure, her thoughts becoming instantly serene as I left.

I spent the next few hours hovering between the chapel and the waiting room, listening to Renee's thoughts, waiting for her to fall asleep. Finally, it dawned on me that sleep was not going to come easily for Renee tonight. I decided to run to the hotel, the night and the shadows of the buildings around the hospital enabling me to travel with relative ease. I did have to ensure that I was indeed washed and changed as proof that I had in fact left the hospital.

* * *

"Well Edward, I didn't expect to see you here," Alice said sarcastically, opening the door to my soft tapping. She knew I was coming...of course she did.

"Renee needs some time with Bella, and I need to seem human enough that I have eaten, slept and changed clothes," I responded, shrugging my shoulders. "Bella should be taken off sedation tomorrow, but I'm sure you already know that."

She laughed her tinkling laugh and indicated for me to enter, saying, "I've been arranging some clothes for you. The concierge was very helpful, especially since I'm a VIP. He arranged for a personal shopper today, so you're all set Edward." She also wore a new dress, its purple hue suiting her complexion perfectly. On the end of the bed sat two sets of freshly purchased clothes, socks and underwear as well as a pair of black leather shoes.

"Thank you," I said as I frowned, suddenly distracted by Alice's thoughts. She was silently conveying that Bella was not going to leave Forks easily. Bella would probably refuse her mother, though the images of her vision were incomplete, and flickered as would an old film partially damaged by deterioration.

"Oh," I said, the creases on my face deepening with worry. As much as I did not want Bella to leave, if the decision were hers or Renee's, any decision I make would matter not. Frustration welled within me as I felt the weight of responsibility rest squarely on my shoulders once more.

"So you'd better make your mind up," she said, folding her arms and pouting in disapproval. "The visions have been all over the place today, thanks to your indecision, Edward Cullen!"

"Sorry if my inability to make up my mind inconveniences you!" I snapped back, striding past her and picking up the clothes off the bed.

"Don't forget, that's my best friend, and a member of our family you're thinking about dumping," she retorted as she suddenly stood in front of me, demanding that I look at her. I knew she was right. And there lay the other side of the coin. The side that although was a consideration, had been put on the backburner in favour of my feelings and the feelings of Bella's family. One thing was certain. More than one heart would be broken in the next forty-eight hours, no matter my decision, and it was all on my shoulders as to whose heart it would be, the multitude of potential people I would be hurting building in ever increasing number.

"I'm not forgetting ANYTHING!" I hissed, pushing past Alice and slamming the bathroom door shut.

* * *

Renee was finally asleep, and as I silently slipped into the room, Bella's scent hit me heavily. The scent of the transfusion had finally ebbed away, leaving nothing behind but pure heaven, and I could not have been happier. I inhaled deeply and imbibed her delicious smell, which drowned out Renee's completely, and watched as the sky lightened behind the blinds on the window. I stood near the door and took in everything around me, the monitor and their breathing sounding like a composition...a symphony of sorts...one that gave me a sense of comfort as I tried to make a rational decision of the fate of not only the people in this room, but the ones that were back in Forks.

Renee dreamt of baseball and of Bella, the flights of fancy going on in her dreams reminding me of how child-like and innocent her mind actually was. It was interesting, fascinating to tune into Renee's mind. How I wished I were so easily privy to Bella's.

The skies lightened further, bringing me no closer to a decision. The only decision I made was that I would talk to Bella and glean her response. How weak I was!

As the sun streamed through the window Renee began to stir. I stealthily slipped outside, giving her ample opportunity to wake and think that I had spent the night at the hotel. I decided to head for the entrance as I realised that Renee would need a human moment and some breakfast.

"Oh," she said as she emerged from the bathroom, nearly walking into me as I strode past her and headed towards Bella's room, trying to give the impression that I was nonchalantly bumping into Renee.

"Good morning," I said in surprised greeting, smiling at Renee as I stopped in my tracks. "How did you sleep?"

"Not very well," she replied, rubbing the back of her neck with her hand. At that moment, a nurse strode past us and headed for Bella's room.

"Nurse?" Renee asked. "Is everything alright?"

The nurse's thoughts were even, and on task. She had been instructed by Dr. Grainger to check on Bella and to let us know that he would be along soon.

"Yes, of course. Dr. Grainger is on his way," she said calmly as we followed closely behind and walked into the room.

I heard the good doctor's footsteps approach, and was grateful that he had arrived so early in the morning to see Bella.

"Good morning," he said as he entered the room and stood at the end of the bed. "How's our patient been doing?" he asked, smiling at Renee as we stood at the end of the bed next to him.

"Not a peep from her all night," Renee answered, glancing toward Bella.

He picked up her chart and took a pen out of his breast pocket, scribbling on the page and grunting in approval. He approached to the machine, checking the readouts and making further notations on her chart, his thoughts leaning towards taking Bella off sedation. The time had arrived. I swallowed nervously in response.

He requested the nurse to remove the bag that contained the medication keeping her away from me, and instructed her to replace it with pure saline solution. "Keep a close eye on her, and give her pain relief when required." The nurse nodded silently in acquiescence as he wrote further on the chart.

He turned away from the machinery and stared at the both of us, his eyes filled with sympathy. "It will probably take Miss Swan a while to wake, and she may still be in quite a bit of pain when she does," he confirmed. "But if the pain is too much, we can assist her with some pain relief," he confirmed. "You don't look as though you've had much sleep. What if I escort you to the cafeteria? It's just opened and you look as though you could use something to eat," he said as he focused his eyes on Renee.

"Of course, yes," she answered, her stomach growling in agreement as they headed for the door.

"I've already eaten, you go ahead. I will keep watch here and let you know if she wakes," I said, having no intention of leaving Bella alone until her eyes opened.

Renee frowned, but reluctantly agreed, leaving the room with the kindly doctor. I was by Bella's side immediately, laying my head on the pillow next to my love...watching her chest rise and fall...feeling her hot breaths and scent surround me...waiting for her to return to me...even only but for a brief moment in time...


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Aww I'm gonna cry! This is the chapter where the dialogue rejoins with the book...and it's getting close now. **_**This chapter is dedicated to Jennifer and Michaela...I want to thank you so VERY much for your kind words of support! (and you know what I'm talking about – MWAH!)**_

**Disclaimer: I don't claim to own any of the Twilight Series, Stephenie Meyer's stories, the movies, the action figures, the souvenir posters, the soundtracks, the man himself (hehe you know I luffs ya) or any of the wolf pack's shedding hair (which sometimes gets in my cereal...ewww!) **

EPOV

Light refracted around the room, changing, moving with every heartbeat, the morning inevitably progressing as the glorious form of Bella Swan lay in her bed. Tubes and wires fed her into her tiny body, and the machinery continued to amplify the beautiful rhythm of her heart, the delicious symphony of sounds bathing me in a soothing ocean of comfort. I watched and waited for what seemed an eternity, but was in fact only several minutes. Every hair, skin cell, vein, in fact every part of her lay gloriously before me under my ever-watchful eye. My face was inches from hers...so close that her scent bombarded me, causing my stomach to clench in permanence. She was truly my drug of choice now, and weaning myself off her would be the greatest challenge of my existence, and quite possibly be the cause of my ultimate undoing.

I continued to study her, marvelling at her beauty, sighing deeply as I took in every detail of the woman I loved. Her face was serene, as if heaven had blessed her a thousand times over. Her hair, splayed atop the starkly contrasting lumpy white pillow was as mesmerising as a crimson fire, its tendrils shimmering softly, the strawberry scented aroma that haloed it intoxicating. Her eyes, though closed, remained etched within my mind clear as day, and were as vast as all the oceans combined, their beauty barely overshadowed by the ever knowing soul that lay within them. She was wondrous in every sense of the word, flawless to a fault and the only woman that I had ever, or would ever, truly love. It was as if God himself had sculpted her just for me, creating the ultimate masterpiece, her soul forever bound to my body, endowing me my humanity. Bella Swan had given me so many gifts, that no matter what happened now, I would continue to benefit from them. I loved her so much...so much, that whatever happened from this moment forth would be for her. All for her.

As I pondered, her heart rate increased and she let out a small moan, her signs of impending lucidity bringing me closer still as I rested my chin on the pillow.

"Bella, love. Can you hear me?" I whispered in desperation, my need to hear her voice becoming all consuming as her sweet, warm breath surrounded me. Her body twitched in response and her heart rate spiked as if my voice alone was bringing her back to me. "Bella?" I asked of her once more, watching as her eyes rolled behind her violet lids and her breath quickened. My ears pricked for any sounds of movement, noise or approaching footfalls from outside the room. There was nothing. I was alone with my love, and she was about to return to me. Her breath hitched, and her lips quivered, the sedation finally beginning to wear off as she began to regain consciousness.

If I had a heart it would be exploding out of my chest as my impatience grew thin, every nerve and fibre filling me with an unending sense of urgency. "Bella, please wake up," I begged, watching her body as it fought against the shackles of sedation that had tethered her to this bed and kept her away from me.

"Bella!" I whimpered before I held my breath and fell silent, my eyes catching her movements...her beautiful body slowly coming to life as would a flower unfolding itself to the morning light. Her head moved away from me and she let out a gush of air, her eyelids finally fluttering open, only to squint under the brilliance of the fluorescent light. Her eyes blinked in quick succession as she tried to adjust to the light and gain her bearings. Still holding my breath, I waited in silence as my mind screamed for her beautiful eyes to meet mine and her mouth to speak her first words. Instead, to my frustration, she stared toward the blinds and stark walls and remained silent.

Then, in typical Bella fashion, her eyes focused on the tubes coming out of her hand, and in defiance she moved her free hand in an attempt to remove them.

"No, you don't," I said as I quickly intercepted her hand with my own, the heat incredible as our skin touched, the electricity humming to the point of becoming maddening as she watched our skin touch. My body lurched in response to the electricity. Bella was and would always be the only human who ever elicited such a physical reaction in me. Her heart sang to me and an immediate pink hue appeared on the apples of her cheeks at the same time, awakening my senses and taking my breath away as she opened her mouth to speak.

"Edward?" she said as she turned toward me and captured me in her hypnotic gaze, her eyes glassy and her pupils immediately dilating. Without realising it, I moved in closer, so close that our breaths took in the flavour and temperature of the other. Her voice! Finally! I heard her voice! All my fear and doubt flew out the window as she spoke, her voice like a healing balm, soothing me inside and out as she rested her hand on the bed. What was I to do now? In the abstract, leaving Bella was hard, but now that she was awake, her eyes full of life...it was an impossibility! I focused on my internal mantra, telling myself that letting her go was the right thing to do...eventually. For now, however, I would have to comfort her and do everything in my power to encourage her to heal. What a coward I was. I was still no closer to a decision.

Her features softened, but then her eyes widened as she began to absorb exactly where she was and what had occurred. "Oh Edward, I'm so sorry!" she cried in desperation. And there it was. Bella apologising for her predicament, when it was not of her making.

"Shhhh," I shushed. "Everything's all right now," I said with assurance, trying to keep Bella calm, my words contradicting my potentially out of control feelings. Why did I want to kiss her...touch her...taste her? My thoughts were digressing at the most inappropriate of times...and I could not believe how selfish I was!

The look on her face was one of slow realisation as her mind began to take in her dire situation. Oh how I wanted more than anything to be able to read that mind of hers...and take her in my arms!

"What happened?" she asked of me finally, stopping my desires dead. What indeed. Thoughts and horrific recollections then flooded my mind, and I wondered how much I could tell her without distressing her. Regret and sadness entrenched itself within my heart as I considered what to say next. I could not lie to her. She would see through my lie anyway, as she always did...as if I were made of glass.

"I was almost too late. I could have been too late," I whispered, torment pervading my voice as I recalled the torture that that animal had subjected Bella to.

"I was so stupid Edward. I thought he had my mom," she said.

"He tricked us all," I responded, trying to make Bella see that she was not the stupid one in this situation. She was human, driven by emotion. I, however, had no excuse for my stupidity.

"I need to call Charlie, and my mom," she said as her eyes darted around the room briefly.

"Alice called them. Renee is here - well, here in the hospital. She's getting something to eat right now," I said, leaving out Charlie's rather quick but dramatic visit, as he had requested.

"She's here?" she responded, surprised as she tried to sit up in the bed. Then, her eyes began to flutter and roll slightly and the colour left her face, as if she were giddy. What was she DOING? My hand was immediately on her shoulder, preventing her from moving, and with one swift but gentle movement I pushed her back down on the bed.

"She'll be back soon," I promised. "And you need to stay still," I warned, watching as her eyes regained their normal movement, her gaze capturing mine as I removed my hand from her shoulder. Oh, how I missed looking into those hauntingly beautiful eyes!

Then, all at once her physical responses changed, distracting me from my freefall into oblivion. Her breathing quickened and her heart picked up its pace. Her muscles tightened and her eyes widened, and with all of these things occurring at the same time, I sensed that she was beginning to panic. "But what did you tell her?" she asked, not taking a breath before she clarified further in a higher pitched and more worrisome tone, "Why did you tell her I'm here?"

"You fell down two flights of stairs and through a window," I blurted, pausing as I watched for her response, hoping with everything I had that she would calm herself. She blinked thrice in quick succession, and then her face softened in realisation, while at the same time her heart rate slowed to a more pleasing rate. "You have to admit, it could happen," I mused, attempting a wry smile.

She sighed, her sweet breath flowing over me, grimacing slightly as she looked upon her broken body under the sheet. "How bad am I?" she asked. How bad indeed. I pondered this question as her scent quelled, and though her injuries were indeed horrific, things could have been so much worse. A strange combination of anger and relief washed through me.

I immediately recalled the notes on the chart, and methodically rattled off her injuries in the exact order that they were written on the page, all the while trying to remain calm, pushing my anger at myself and James deep down. "You have a broken leg, four broken ribs, some cracks in your skull, bruises covering every inch of your skin, and you lost a lot of blood," I said, trying to keep my emotions in check as the anger tore through the pit of my stomach. I inhaled deeply, her scent replacing the anger with the oh-so-delicious burning, reminding me further of the transfusions. "They gave you a few transfusions. I didn't like it – it made you smell all wrong for a while."

"That must have been a nice change for you," she said, her lip curving up on one side as she tried but failed to smile. I sensed that if she did smile, it would be painful with the injuries she had sustained.

"No, I like how YOU smell," I said in response, watching as her beautiful face began to fill with colour once more. God, how I loved this woman!

"How did you do it?" she asked quietly, and if I had human hearing I would have nearly missed it. The question lingered in my head unwelcome, and I immediately knew what she was asking. She was asking for an answer to a question that I still did not know the answer to. With other pressing matters to contemplate, I had afforded myself little time to ponder how I managed to stop draining every drop of the ambrosia that was her blood from her body. I felt my body tighten with need as I recalled the exquisite taste of her. Shame and self-loathing immediately followed, suffocating the need as I realised that my weakness was nearly the death of her.

"I'm not sure," I replied as I looked away from her wondering eyes and fixed my gaze on her permanently scarred skin. I reached over and took her delicate hand in mine, the heat soothing even from underneath the gauze, as I pondered further. She took in a little breath in response to my touch and waited...silently demanding me to elaborate.

I let out a sigh in frustration, and continued to avert my gaze from her, studying her injured hand. My finger touched briefly above where I knew the wound was, and where she would be scarred forever, its temperature colder than the surrounding skin. "It was impossible...to stop," I whispered, tortured by my admission as I realised that I had scarred this beautiful, innocent woman permanently, and in more ways than I dared to count. "Impossible. But I did it," I said as I looked her in the eye, her gaze soaking into me. "I MUST love you," I confessed with reverence as I felt my lips curve into half a smile. That was the understatement of the century. The depth of my love for this beautiful creature was the reason why she was here.

Then, as Bella often did, she surprised me once more. "Don't I taste as good as I smell?" she asked, smiling in response as her breath stopped and the pain etched itself clearly on her face. I felt an overwhelming sense of need as I recalled everything about her delicious flavour.

"Even better – better than I imagined," I answered truthfully, and without thought of her reaction.

"I'm sorry," she said.

Exasperated, I tilted my head back and stared at the ceiling, beseeching the heavens to stop Bella from blaming herself for the situation she now found herself in. "Of all the things to apologise for," I groaned in frustration.

Her response, as ever, was unexpected and entirely Bella. "What SHOULD I apologise for?"

"For nearly taking yourself away from me forever," I answered in a breathless whisper, the thought of losing her hurting me to the core as I recalled her selfless decision to protect her mother. I wondered if Bella Swan's selflessness somehow cancelled out my selfishness.

"I'm sorry," she repeated.

I sought to assure her. "I know why you did it. It was still irrational, of course. You should have waited for me, you should have told me," I said in a rush, hoping that my words of comfort were enough to lift the guilt from her tiny shoulders and place it where it should be.

Her mouth hardened slightly as she said grimly, "You wouldn't have let me go."

"No I wouldn't," I agreed. And of course I would NEVER subject Bella to the wrath of that predator. I had no choice, and it seemed that Bella felt she had no choice either.

In response, her body shuddered causing her to wince, the pain making itself known once more. Oh, how I wish I were able to take all her pain and hurt away!

"Bella, what's wrong?" I asked anxiously, already knowing the discomfort that she was experiencing but wanting to take it away just the same.

My brave Bella chose to ignore my question, as was her way, and instead asked a question of her own. "What happened to James?"

A surge of hatred filled my body at the mere idea of his name falling from her innocent lips. As much as I wanted to put what happened in the past, I would have to fill Bella in on exactly what happened to assure her that he would never hurt her again.

"After I pulled him off you, Emmett and Jasper took care of him," I answered with regret, wanting more than anything for revenge to have been mine and mine alone.

Her brows creased together, and she stared at me with a sense of confusion and said, "I didn't see Emmett and Jasper there."

"They had to leave the room...there was a lot of blood," I answered, recalling in an instant the enormous volume of blood that she had lost, the image of her palllid, lifeless body lying in a pool of her own blood forever burned in my psyche.

"But you stayed," she breathed.

"Yes, I stayed," I said simply.

"And Alice and Carlisle...?" she asked in wonder.

"They love you, too, you know," I interjected, the pride welling within me as Bella's expression became anxious.

"Did Alice see the tape?" Ah, yes. The tape. Bella was always concerned with the wellbeing of others over herself. Oh, how I loved her!

"Yes," I replied as a wave of hatred invaded my senses. As much as Alice was relieved to learn a little more of her mysterious introduction into this world, the fact that James was the cause of Alice being abandoned, having to face the world as a newborn alone, made my blood boil.

"She was always in the dark, that's why she didn't remember," she said simply, her knowing eyes ever-watchful of mine.

"I know. She understands now," I replied, my voice even as I tried to contain the fury that threatened to spill out of me unbidden. Up until finding happiness with us, Alice had to endure the most horrible of human existences in an asylum, only to be changed by a vampire who was then killed by James. Was there no end to the carnage that this James would cause? Why did he have to pervade the lives of those that I loved, poisoning everything he touched forever?

Her arm jerked forward and was stopped just as quickly as she reached for my face, the IV preventing her touching me. "Ugh," she complained, wincing as she glanced at the tubes which tethered her, restricting her movements.

"What is it?" I asked, her situation distracting me somewhat from my fury.

"Needles," she explained as she averted her eyes from the tubes in her hand and stared at the same warped ceiling tile that I had looked at whenever I prayed for answers.

"Afraid of a needle," I muttered to myself under my breath, shaking my head, the irony of her explanation not escaping my notice. "Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, sure no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV on the other hand..." In response to my ramblings, Bella rolled her eyes and then fixed them squarely on me.

"Why are you here?" she asked. What? Was it possible that after all that she had been through that she did not want me after all?

Confused and hurt, I felt my brows knit together and the pain sear through my body as I asked with fear and trepidation, "Do you want me to leave?"

"No!" she protested, her expression horrified. "No, I meant, why does my mother think you're here? I need to have my story straight before she gets back," she said with logic. Of course, she was correct.

"Ok," I said as I felt my face relax, relieved that she was not ordering me away. "I came to Phoenix to talk some sense into you, to convince you to come back to Forks." Bella studied my face as I spoke, and her expression confirmed that the story so far was truly believable. I continued, "You agreed to see me, and you drove out to the hotel where I was staying with Carlisle and Alice – of course I was here with parental supervision, but you tripped on the stairs on the way to my room and...well, you know the rest. You don't need to remember any details, though; you have a good excuse to be muddled about the finer points."

I watched and waited as Bella considered the story, her expression thoughtful, the lie that we had fed her parents now revealed to her in its entirety. I knew she was honest, but I also knew that above all, she was loyal and very protective of her family and hoped that she did not have a problem with having to keep the truth from them. She was now, after all, a part of my world, a world where lying was a necessary evil...one to protect both our existence, and the lives of those humans whose lives had become entangled with ours. "There are a few flaws with that story. Like no broken windows," she said.

"Not really. Alice had a little too much fun fabricating the evidence. It's all been taken care of very convincingly – you could probably sue the hotel if you wanted to. You have nothing to worry about," I promised as I reached out and softly stroked her heated cheek, my breath hitching as I did so. "Your only job now is to heal." In response the monitor jumped erratically, her response causing her cheeks to heat further, my desire to kiss her skin now overwhelming.

"That's going to be embarrassing," she muttered.

In response I chuckled as I tried in vain to control my emotions. And then I wondered if my touch would affect her recovery, as I had noted on many occasions that her heart in fact did increase in pace when I was near her. Selfish as I was, I decided to test my theory. "Hmmm...I wonder," I said to myself as I leaned in slowly, intending to kiss her. Before my lips even touched hers, the monitor beeped wildly. As I kissed her with the most gentlest of pressures that I could muster, the monitor, and in turn her heart, stopped altogether. Anxious at this response, I pulled back abruptly, and as I did I felt a sense of relief as the monitor began to behave as it should, her heart restarting its gentle rhythm once more.

"It seems that I'm going to have to be even more careful with you than usual," I said as I felt my brows pull together into a frown. Her reactions to me never ceased to astound me, but I knew one thing. If I was human, and it was me lying in that bed, my heart would be racing at this very moment.

"I was not finished kissing you," Bella complained. "Don't make me come over there."

My desires were so scattered that I could not help but grant Bella her wish and, grinning, I bent in and pressed my lips to hers once more, sending the monitor wild. In response my lips went taut, and I reluctantly but sensibly pulled away from her, sitting ramrod straight in the plastic chair.

_Bella should be awake by now. Why did that doctor keep me away so long? He talks so much!_

Realising that Renee was on her way, I sat up, smiled and said, "I think I hear your mother."

"Don't leave me," she cried as her heart skipped a beat. Of course I would not leave her, and now, seeing the panic written all over her face, I could not leave her. Not yet, anyway.

"I won't," I promised as solemnly as was possible, smiling at her in assurance to make my point. "I'll take a nap."

I slid the chair away and stood to my feet, reluctantly leaving her side, and took my place on the recliner at the foot of the bed, closing my eyes.

"Don't forget to breathe," she reminded sarcastically. Suppressing a smile, I drew in a deep breath, allowing my chest to rise and fall to demonstrate that I could indeed behave like a human.

"Yes I had a wonderful breakfast, but I'm in a hurry if you'll excuse me. I'm going to see if Bella's woken yet," Renee said as she approached the door.

"She should be waking any time now, but I think that young man is still with her," warned a familiar voice. Ah, yes. The nurse who thought I needed to be committed. _Poor lady. Imagine having such a clumsy daughter? And I thought my daughter was bad enough with all her stupid boyfriends and silly piercings! She's got much more to contend with than me...and that boy. He sure is strange. If I was her mother, I wouldn't let him anywhere near my daughter!_

_Of course he is. I think that getting Bella back to Jacksonville and away from Edward will be the best thing for everyone. _"Thank you so much," Renee said as I heard her rush toward the door of Bella's room. Renee had decided to bring Bella home, and as her thoughts reminded me of that fact, my heart began to crumble, small shards of it piercing every part of my body. Renee held the fate of Bella, and in turn myself and my family, in her child-like human hands now and though I knew letting Bella go was the right thing to do, I knew I would never recover. The pendulum began to swing back and forth once more...my fate and that of my family as yet undecided as the pieces of my heart fell away piece by agonising piece...

**A/N: As this chapter is so long in the book, I've decided to split it...otherwise it would take me too long to bring it to you! Next chapter will have some interesting thoughts from Renee in response to Bella's refusal to go home with her...SO SHOW ME THE LOVE **


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: I do apologise my lovelies for taking so very long to post another chapter for this story. I have been scolded into submission by Selena...and rightly so! I have to go with where my mind takes me and have been adding to other stories that I'm currently working on. My head has no rhyme or reason to it, so there it is. I'M SORRY! Do you forgive me? I can't believe I'm to 199 reviews on this...and I'm grateful for each and every one of them. You guys ROCK! I wonder if I could reach over 250 by the end of the story? Who knows? Oh well...on with the show...**

**I would like to take a special moment to thank Jennifer and Michaela. You girls have been my rock, my soft place to fall and my friends, supporting me throughout this story even when I was on the verge of letting it go. Thank you from the bottom of my heart! You ladies are very special, and mean the world to me...don't ever forget that! :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or even Midnight Sun. But I gave writing it my best shot! LOL**

EPOV

I heard the door open, and continued to remain still, steadily breathing in and out.

"Mom!" Bella cried as if she were a child again, her voice filled with love and relief at the very sight of her mother.

_Oh good, he's finally asleep. This may be my only chance to speak to Bella._

The woman who held my fate in her hands walked into the room quietly, deliberately. Outwardly she was a woman on a mission. Inwardly, she was a little flustered, her thoughts still scattering like leaves in the autumn breeze. Underneath it all, however, I sensed a steely determination, and that was what concerned me most. My breaths remained slow and even, as I tried to contain my emerging emotions, which appeared to mirror Renee's.

"He never leaves, does he?" she mumbled. _This boy is obsessed with my daughter!_

"Mom I'm so glad to see you!" Bella cried. I sensed that she truly did miss her mother, and was genuinely pleased to see her. For that, I was relieved, but at the same time my escalating feelings, which ranged from fear to anguish, tore away at me. I stopped breathing for a moment as I tried to compose myself, and they continued their conversation.

_Oh God Bella, don't cry! _I heard Bella's quiet sobs as she cried, wanting more than anything to soothe away her pain, but I knew that I needed to allow Renee to mother her only daughter.

"Bella, I was so upset," she said childishly, not really communicating what her thoughts reflected.

"I'm sorry, Mom. But everything's fine now, it's okay," Bella replied, her voice soothing her mother, their roles reversing once more. Were there no bounds to Bella's selfless nature?

_Oh dear, she's apologising to me for upsetting me. Why do I say such things? And why do I always feel as though she's mothering me?_

"I'm just so glad to see your eyes open," Renee replied as I heard the bed creak with the weight of her sitting on the bed next to Bella.

"How long have they been closed?"

How long indeed. Exactly two days, sixteen hours and thirty six minutes to be exact. I focused once more, and began to breathe.

_Oh, when was it when Bella got hurt? I've lost track of time! Oh well, best not upset her too much anyway._

"It's Friday, hon, you've been out for a while," she replied vaguely.

"Friday?" Bella replied, her voice resoundingly shocked.

_Oh dear, she has no idea how very serious this was! Poor Bella!_

"They had to keep you sedated for a while, honey – you've got a whole lot of injuries," she responded, clearly feeling discomfort at confirming that Bella had been gravely injured. Oh if only she knew...

"I know," Bella replied, her voice straining against the obvious pain she felt, causing my body to tense with worry.

_I have to make her see how lucky she was...she can't ever do this again!_

"You're lucky Dr. Cullen was there," she said. _And what a hunk! If I was just a few years younger and single..._

I nearly laughed at her digressing thoughts, but instead breathed a little more rapidly to cover up my near indiscretion while I felt a slight smile creep over my lips. After considerable effort, I managed to wipe it away as I tried to keep up my facade of the sleeping human.

"He's such a nice man...very young, though. And he looks more like a model than a doctor..."

_How is it possible that the entire family are so young and good looking? They are their own fashion magazine!_

I was so amused by Renee's playful thoughts that it made me feel lighter and less troubled than I had in a while. I knew worse was to come, however, and waited for the inevitable...but seemed buoyed by Renee's demeanour. Perhaps she would be accepting of things no matter what the outcome. Or, perhaps I was fooling myself.

"You met Carlisle?"

"And Edward's sister, Alice. She's a lovely girl," Renee said, Alice's heart having taken in another victim. Alice was a lovely girl. She was the glue that bound us all together, and was the most human of all the Cullen siblings. She had the uncanny ability to bring out the best in everyone, and I suspected that even if she did not have her visions, she would still possess that ability. Her attitude was always so upbeat and she could easily relate to anyone she met, be they human or vampire and that never ceased to amaze me considering her start in this life. Though I was the mind reader, Alice was a soul reader of the highest calibre, of that I had no doubt. She always knew how to cater to the needs of those around her, even if she had to goad them into what she knew was best for them, and I loved her for it even when it nearly drove me crazy.

"She is," Bella agreed with sincerity, confirming that Alice was correct and that she and Bella would become close. I wondered that if we left Forks if that would ever be. Bella would then be deprived of a special friendship with a special person, and it would be of my doing.

_Look at him. He and his family have become more than a passing fancy. _As Renee's thoughts turned to those of my close knit family and the bond they shared with Bella, I sensed that they were both staring at me and focused on my slow and steady breathing once more, my breaths calming me somewhat.

"You didn't tell me you had such great friends in Forks," Renee muttered, her thoughts continuing to remain concerned about Bella's bond with me and my family. Indeed, she had cause to be concerned. More than she would ever realise. _Look at my Bella, she's so vulnerable, so broken. She seems to be more reliant on this boy and his family than is healthy. My poor, beautiful girl. She's always been so independent, but now..._

I heard the bed creak as Bella shifted her body and moaned, causing me to immediately open my eyes and stare at her pain filled face. I had to fight every instinct I had to stay put and not rush to her side to comfort her. Thankfully, Renee's eyes were fixed on her daughter and she asked in desperation, "What hurts?"

"It's fine," she said as she stared at me in assurance. "I just have to remember not to move." I inhaled and closed my eyes once more, relieved that she had not injured herself further, the desire burning within every part of my being to rush to her side.

"Where's Phil?" Bella asked, no doubt trying to distract her mother from her pain and therefore her focus. If only she knew that she was walking into an inevitably awkward and potentially life changing conversation.

_Well, now's as good a time as ever. Here goes..._

"Florida – oh Bella! You'll never guess! Just when we were about to leave, the best news!"

"Phil got signed?" Bella replied.

"Yes! How did you guess! The Suns, can you believe it?" Indeed. This situation was incredibly unbelievable.

"That's great, Mom," Bella said with a little enthusiasm, but her voice indicated that she was confused.

_Time to get this girl home._ Now for the difficult conversation. My fate was now in the hands of Renee, and I clenched my fists in anticipation. Without a breath, Renee began to launch into her plea for her daughter to return home to her.

"And you'll like Jacksonville so much," Renee gushed. "I was a little bit worried when Phil started talking about Akron, what with the snow and everything, because you know how I hate the cold, but now Jacksonville! It's always sunny, and the humidity really isn't THAT bad. We found the cutest home, yellow, with white trim, and a porch just like in an old movie, and this huge oak tree, and it's just a few minutes from the ocean, and you'll have your own bathroom..."

"Wait, Mom!" Bella interrupted. My body was on fire, every sinew tense with anticipation as I peeked through my lidded eyes and found Bella's staring at me with a look of sheer panic on her face. I realised that I did not appear asleep, but I could not control my emotions any longer and had to see what was occurring. "What are you talking about? I'm not going to live in Florida. I live in Forks," she added as my eyes shut once more and I mentally sighed. My muscles uncoiled in an instant at her words, but then the tension reappeared as I realised I was back to square one. Bella was not about to allow Renee to decide her fate...and in turn the fate of my family and myself.

_Oh dear Bella! Why on earth do you feel obligated to live in that horrible place? Obviously she still thinks I will be away with Phil. That's all it is, surely...I obviously need to clarify things with her._

"But you don't have to anymore, silly," she laughed. "Phil will be able to be around so much more now...we've talked about it a lot, and what I'm going to do is trade off on the away games half the time with you, and half the time with him."

"Mom," Bella said, hesitating, no doubt trying to think of how to let her mother down easily. "I WANT to live in Forks. I'm already settled in at school, and I have a couple of girlfriends."

_Likely story. It's that boy. Of course it is. _

Bella let out a small sigh and tried another tactic, picking up on the fact that her mother suspected that I had too much influence on her decisions. And, she was correct in her assumption. "And Charlie needs me. He's just all alone up there, and he can't cook AT ALL," she argued.

_This is unbelievable! Why on earth would ANYONE want to stay in that godforsaken place? Charlie's managed without Bella this long... _Renee's thoughts were lost, and she appeared to feel defeated. How could she argue against her daughter apparently abandoning her helpless father?

"You want to stay in Forks?" she asked, bewilderment in her voice. "Why?"

"I told you – school, Charlie – ouch!" Without thought as to the consequences, my eyes shot open briefly but I did not move. Renee was fussing over Bella, unable to think of what to do, finally patting Bella on her unbandaged forehead. I let out a relieved breath and closed my eyes once more, though the fear and frustration that I felt was still there.

_I can't let this happen. I miss her! _

"Bella, honey, you hate Forks," Renee reminded her with futility.

"It's not so bad," Bella answered somewhat casually.

_I can't stand this. I have to ask her. Look at the boy! He's gorgeous...and looks can take a girl in... _

"Is it this boy?"

"He's part of it," Bella admitted. Oh if it were only that casual, that simple. "So, have you had a chance to talk with Edward?"

"Yes," she replied, hesitating as I felt her eyes bore into me once more. "And I want to talk to you about that." I breathed in and out, trying my best to still appear asleep, a sudden knot making an appearance in my stomach.

"What about?" Bella asked with mock innocence.

"I think that boy is in love with you," she said in an accusing tone, keeping her voice low.

I breathed in and out, the knot increasing in size, my breaths becoming rapid. As much as I loved Bella, I did not want to be the cause of any misgivings between them. I did not need to add that to the long list of wrongdoings I had exacted upon her. I wondered if she would confess her feelings about me to her mother, the knot twisting within me as I waited for her response.

"I think so too," Bella answered.

"And how do you feel about him?" _As if I didn't know._

Bella sighed, hesitating before she spoke, no doubt trying to choose her words carefully so as not to alienate her mother, or make her worry about the serious nature of our relationship. "I'm pretty crazy about him."

_Crazy...now there's a word. Oh no, Bella! Please don't go down the same road as I did with Charlie! I can't lose her over this. What should I do? Hmmm...I will just have to be diplomatic._

"Well, he SEEMS very nice, and, my goodness, he's incredibly good-looking, but you're so young, Bella..." she said with uncertainty, no doubt because her parental concern was not her usual role to play.

"I know that, Mom. Don't worry about it. It's just a crush," Bella replied soothingly, their roles immediately switching back once more.

_A crush? I guess I can deal with that..._

Renee's thoughts were SO child-like. She was willing to accept Bella's explanation rather than challenge them, for fear of losing her. I suspected that she still wanted Bella away from me, but knew that she would need to tread carefully.

"That's right," Renee conceded, seemingly easily pleased. _Oh dear it's nearly time for Phil to call. I miss him so much..._

"Do you need to go?" Bella asked instinctively.

"Phil's supposed to call in a little while...I didn't know you were going to wake up..." And there it was. Renee's life was set and even though she wanted her daughter home, I knew of the tug of war that Renee would have to endure sharing her time between her husband and her daughter. It was the reason why Bella moved to Forks in the first place, and it would be the reason she would never return. That, and the fact that she was in love with a vampire. Renee's easy concession led me to believe that though she would miss her daughter terribly, that Bella staying in Forks would fit in better with the life she was eking out with her new husband.

"No problem, Mom," Bella said, with a tinge of relief in her tone. "I won't be alone."

"I'll be back soon. I've been sleeping here, you know," Renee said with pride.

"Oh, Mom, you don't have to do that! You can sleep at home – I'll never notice."

"I was too nervous," Renee admitted sheepishly. "There's been some crime in the neighbourhood, and I don't like being there alone."

"Crime?" Bella asked in alarm. I loved her so much. Injured as she was she was always more concerned about the ones she loved than her own wellbeing.

"Someone broke into that dance studio around the corner from the house and burned it to the ground – there's nothing left at all! And they left a stolen car right out front. Do you remember when you used to dance there, honey?" she asked.

_Oh, I remember when she was little and we used to walk there on a Saturday. Now it's all gone because of some horrible vandals! I'm so glad we don't live here anymore!_

I was thankful that the subject of where Bella would be living seemed to be settled, Renee's thoughts now back to being skittish and childlike. I was more than relieved that the worst was over.

"I remember," she answered, shivering.

"I can stay, baby, if you need me," Renee offered. _Oh Phil's going to call soon!_

"No, Mom, I'll be fine. Edward will be with me."

_Of course he will. I don't feel right about this, but what choice do I have?_

"I'll be back tonight," she warned. _You won't be spending the night alone with her now that she's awake, Edward Cullen! _

"I love you, Mom," Bella said quickly as if she was trying to get rid of her. My desires began to spike within me as I realised how much I needed to be near her, and realised that Renee was not going to give me much time to do so.

"I love you too, Bella. Try to be more careful when you walk, honey, I don't want to lose you."

Indeed. As much as her clumsiness was not the reason she was injured, I could not help but smile at her mother's statement. I could see why Bella cared for her so much, and imagined a young Charlie being enraptured by her personality, which seemed a polar opposite to his.

_Let's see how the patient is doing. _Realising that a nurse was on the approach to the room, I remained still and breathing, impatient to have my love in my arms once more. Would I ever get her alone again?

The door opened and the nurse bustled in, cueing Renee to leave. I heard her place a soft kiss placed on Bella's skin and walk out, lingering outside before her phone rang and she began to speak with Phil. She told him that Bella would not be returning with her, and that she would be arranging a flight home as soon as was possible to be with him. As her voice faded and joined in with the rabble of thoughts of the rest of those here, I realised, in no uncertain terms, how much Renee loved her new husband and understood why she pined for him. If I was away from Bella, I would be pining for her just the same.

_Oh dear, that boy! Does he never leave the poor girl alone? He probably drove her poor mother away!_

I lay there, my body aching to be near Bella, waiting impatiently for the nurse to finish checking her status as I heard the sound of paper rustling.

"Are you feeling anxious honey? Your heart rate got a little high there." I suppressed a smile, realising that the nurse was staring at the readouts from when I had kissed Bella.

"I'm fine," Bella assured her as the nurse walked to the end of the bed and stood next to me, checking the chart.

"I'll tell your RN you're awake. She'll be in to see you in a minute," she said as she shuffled towards the door. _So don't get any funny ideas young man._

As if I was drowning and Bella was the only thing that could save me, I was by her side the second the door closed. I craved to be near her and the more I was away from her, the more the craving intensified. How was I to leave her now? This was an impossible situation.

I waited for my love to speak, and as was her way, the words that left her beautiful lips surprised me. "You stole a car?" she asked as she raised her eyebrows in disapproval.

"It was a good car, very fast," I replied, smiling, unrepentant, leaving out the fact that it wasn't the only car we had stolen.

"How was your nap?"

"Interesting," I replied as my eyes narrowed and the worry crept back in.

"What?" she asked, perceiving my distress as she so often did.

I looked down, unable to make eye contact with as I answered. "I'm surprised. I thought Florida...and your mother...well, I thought that's what you would want."

As I glanced at her beautiful eyes, she stared at me uncomprehendingly. "But you'd be stuck inside all day in Florida. You'd only be able to come out at night, just like a real vampire."

Her words opened up the opportunity to have the discussion that I had thus far tried to avoid. She had obviously missed my point, and though I tried to smile at her amusing statement, my expression became gravely serious as I prepared to explain exactly what I meant, the pain readying itself to tear through me, and in turn, through Bella. "I would stay in Forks, Bella. Or somewhere like it," I explained. "Someplace where I couldn't hurt you anymore." I held my breath and waited for what I said to sink in. She stared at me blankly, seemingly unable to absorb my words, the pain I was about to cause the woman I loved more than my life threatening to tear me apart piece by piece.

Then a look of realisation crossed her beautiful face, followed by distressing physical responses. Her heartbeat accelerated and her breaths came hard and fast, to the point of near hyperventilation. Her face contorted with pain...a pain that had nothing to do with her broken body, I feared. What had I done? I hadn't thought this through and now I had hurt her so deeply, so profoundly that I had no idea what to do. I had hurt her right when she was at her most vulnerable! I watched her face warily as the pain threatened to crush us both, and if I could cry, my eyes would be flooded at this moment as the pain and guilt marched relentlessly through my body. What a heel I was! The nurse was correct. I needed to be committed!

I heard another nurse approach, and hoped that her attendance would somehow distract Bella enough for her thumping heart to calm. I feared that, however, nothing was going to help. I was nothing but a selfish, inconsiderate fool for bringing this up now.

The door opened and the nurse walked purposefully into the room, the other nurse no doubt having briefed her on Bella's heart monitor reading.

"Time for more pain meds, sweetheart?" she asked kindly as she tapped the IV, checking its contents and then glancing toward Bella.

"No, no," Bella mumbled. "I don't need anything." I sensed a hint of impatience and urgency in her voice, and I knew that Bella wanted to remain lucid for the rest of our conversation and be rid of the nurse as quickly as possible.

"No need to be brave, honey. It's better if you don't get too stressed out; you need to rest." She waited for Bella to respond, but instead she just shook her head.

_No wonder this young woman wants to stay awake! This young man is obviously distracting her too much..._

"Okay," she sighed. "Hit the call button when you're ready."

She gave me a stern look, silently accusing me of preventing Bella from accepting some further medication and therefore recovering. She then glanced anxiously at the machinery, then turned on her rubber heels and left. I knew I had to make things right with Bella, and her thumping heart told me this in no uncertain terms.

The second the door closed my hands were on her glorious face, the electricity humming between us once more. She stared at me with wild eyes, her out of control emotions threatening to burst forth.

"Shhh, Bella, calm down," I murmured.

"Don't leave me," she begged in a broken voice, her pain filled face forcing my resolve to fade away.

The last vestiges of my resistance crumbled in an instant, and desire took over logic as her eyes begged me to stay. I could not deny her any longer, and as much as I was being selfish, I was also giving her what she needed. Wanted. Desired. What we both longed for more than anything, even though it was against our best interests, against every law known, against every rational thought.

"I won't," I promised, knowing that I was helpless to say anything else. "Now relax before I call the nurse back to sedate you."

Her heart told me that she was still full of doubt as it thumped erratically.

I stroked her face anxiously. "Bella, I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here as long as you need me."

"Do you swear you won't leave me?" she whispered, trying to control the gasping between each word.

I knew she needed further convincing, so I put my hands either side of her beautiful face and leaned my face in closer, staring at her with serious intent. "I swear," I said slowly, deliberately as my breath fanned across her face, soothing her. I continued to hold her gaze until I was satisfied that her breathing had slowed enough that it would be considered normal.

She took in my eyes and she wrinkled her brow, concern crossing her features. I realised that I had not hunted and she had silently acknowledged that fact. She never missed a thing.

"Better?" I asked.

"Yes," she said cautiously as her eyes searched mine.

I shook my head and muttered below my breath, "Your overreaction worries me so much Bella Swan! How could I have allowed you to become so dependent on me?" Then, I realised, that I was just as dependent on her. I could not exist in this world without being by her side. It would kill me, as it would her, I realised.

"Why did you say that?" she whispered, obviously having picked up on one or two of my words. "Are you tired of having to save me all the time? Do you want me to go away?" Oh for the love of...

She not only did not see herself clearly, but had this idealised version of me in her mind. "No, I don't want to be without you, Bella, of course not. Be rational. And I have no problem saving you, either – if it weren't for the fact that I was the one putting you in danger...that I'm the reason you're here."

"Yes, you are the reason," she agreed, frowning. "The reason I'm here – ALIVE."

"Barely," I refuted in a whisper. "Covered in gauze and plaster and hardly able to move."

Then, she appeared to be growing irritated. "I wasn't referring to my most recent near-death experience. I was thinking of the others – you can take your pick. If it weren't for you, I'd be rotting away in Forks cemetery." When would she see that if it weren't for me, the other near-death experiences would not have occurred either? Then, memories came flooding back of a few days back when I found it impossible to stop drinking of her. I winced at the memory of my near miss and the feelings that coursed through me, my heart darkening, crushing under its weight.

"That's not the worst part though," I whispered with regret, continuing with what I had said as if Bella had not spoken. "Not seeing you there on the floor...crumpled and broken," my voice choking under the weight of my trance-like words. "Not thinking I was too late. Not even hearing you scream in pain – all those unbearable memories that I'll carry with me for the rest of eternity. No, the very worst was feeling...knowing that I couldn't stop. Believing that I was going to kill you myself."

"But you didn't," she argued.

"I could have. So easily," I said, still trying to convince myself that leaving Bella was the right thing to do. I was like a plague on her life, relentless in its invasion, leaving nothing but disaster in my wake.

Her breaths became short and sharp at my statement, and I knew she was beginning to feel insecure, the panic threatening to overcome her once more.

"Promise me," she whispered unevenly.

"What?" I asked, knowing what she was asking of me. She wanted me to commit myself to her forever, even if it was the wrong thing to do. I could not commit myself to make her such a foolhardy promise. I loved her, there was no doubt about it...so much that if leaving her was the right thing to do, I would not hesitate.

"You know what," Bella said angrily.

As I stared at my love through narrowed eyes, I came to a disturbing conclusion. I realised I was weak. Too weak to fight her, but also too weak to make her any promises. I was, in a word, a coward. I had hoped that Renee would take the responsibility of deciding whether Bella would remain in my life or not. When that did not work, I agonised about what to do, only to eventually behave in my usual selfish way. And now? I had placed the two of us in this irreconcilable position, and it was all my fault.

"I don't seem to be strong enough to stay away from you, so I suppose that you'll get your way...whether it kills you or not," I added, my voice rough with frustration.

"Good," she replied, her eyes sparking in realisation as to the fact I had not promised her. Her panic appeared under control, but not her anger. "You told me how you stopped...now I want to know why," she demanded.

"Why?"

"WHY you did it. Why didn't you just let the venom spread? By now I would be just like you," she said indignantly.

The shock of hearing her words shook me to the core. Alice! My interfering sister had once again informed Bella of something that I insisted she did not tell her, but she did so anyway. I knew that she had seen Bella as a vampire...but why did she insist on pushing her fate in that direction? Anger suddenly welled within me, my off-kilter emotions making my blood boil. My teeth clenched and my nostrils flared...I...was...INFURIATED!

Seemingly unperturbed by my angered reaction and realising that I was not going to give her an answer, Bella pressed on. "I'll be the first to admit that I have no experience with relationships," she said, surprising me yet again. She always came out with the most unexpected things. "But it seems logical...a man and a woman have to be somewhat equal...as in, one of them can't always be swooping in and saving the other one. They have to save each other EQUALLY." Ah, my Bella. Always the logical thinker. Does she not realise that she has already saved me a thousand times over? Saved me from an existence devoid of love and happiness? Of pain and despair?

Of course it would have been so very simple to allow the venom to spread and for Bella to become like me, and therefore remain with me forever. That would have been the ultimate in selfish moves on my part, one that I could never forgive myself for committing, and though I had done many many selfish things thus far, I was not about to allow that scenario to come into play. Ever. The anger seemed to quell within me as I thought about my change and the suffering and loss of humanity that Bella would have had to endure if I had allowed the venom to spread, and a feeling of relief washed away the anger that I felt toward Alice.

I folded my arms on the edge of the bed and rested my chin on my arms. I had no right to be angry now, not with Bella anyway. "You HAVE saved me," I said with a quiet determination.

Ignoring my statement, she said, "I can't always be Lois Lane. I want to be Superman, too."

"You don't know what you're asking," I said softly, staring at the edge of the pillow, unable to look her in the eye.

"I think I do," she argued.

"Bella, you DON'T know. I've had almost ninety years to think about this, and I'm still not sure."

Then, she surprised me yet again with a very difficult but logical question. "Do you wish that Carlisle hadn't saved you?"

There was a time when I would have answered yes to Bella's question, but that was a long time ago. A time when I had rebelled against the wishes of Carlisle. A time when I left the family to find my own way. A time when I fed on the most abhorrent of humans, justifying my temporary madness by killing those who were about to kill others. A time that would haunt me for the rest of my existence.

"No I don't wish that," I replied, pausing at my thoughts of the past...of my very painful entry into the vampire world. Then, they turned to Bella, her life, her vitality and everything that she would have to leave behind if she were to become like me. "But my life was over. I wasn't giving anything up," I argued.

"You ARE my life. You're the only thing it would hurt me to lose," she said. Indeed. She had mirrored my exact thoughts, yet her statement disturbed me as well. I realised that she was so committed to me, that leaving her without it having a profound, long lasting effect on her would be near impossible now, as her leaving would be for me. I remained calm, and decisive. Bella was never going to change my mind on this matter.

"I can't do it, Bella. I won't do that to you."

"Why not?" she asked in a raspy voice as though she was trying to be angry, but was unsuccessful. "Don't tell me it's too hard! After today, or I guess it was few days ago...anyway, after THAT, it should be nothing."

I glared at her, letting her know that I was not happy with her statement. She had no idea what she was asking. Obviously. "And the pain?" I asked, the temporary pain being the very least of the issues that would arise if Bella were to be changed.

She blanched, though at the same time tried to keep her expression even, as she no doubt recollected the pain that she experienced...pain that she would have to endure for three days.

"That's my problem," she justified. "I can handle it."

My body tensed in response to her statement. "It's possible to take bravery to the point where it becomes insanity," I said.

"It's not an issue. Three days. Big deal."

I grimaced again, Bella more informed than I first thought, Alice in my sights as the anger tried to break free. Instead I kept a lid on my feelings, electing to remain calm and rational in light of what she was asking of me.

"Charlie?" I asked curtly. "Renee?"

Minutes passed in silence as I watched Bella struggle to answer my question. She opened her mouth, but no sound came out and she closed it again. I was relieved that her argument had come to a standstill, as I did not wish to go down this very precarious path. I waited, triumphant feelings surging through me as I realised that she could not find a true answer.

"Look, that's not an issue either," she finally muttered unconvincingly. "Renee has always made the choices that work for her – she'd want me to do the same. And Charlie's resilient, he's used to being on his own. I can't take care of them forever. I have my own life to live."

Without realising it, she had blown her entire argument out of the water. "Exactly," I snapped in response. "And I won't end it for you."

Like a dog with a bone, Bella would not let up. "If you're waiting for me to be on my deathbed, I've got news for you! I was just there!"

"You're going to recover," I reminded her as her heart began to stutter.

She took a deep, calming breath, and stared at me, and I stared back just as intently. I was not going to budge on this issue, no matter her argument.

"No," she said slowly. "I'm not."

My forehead creased with her statement, the frustration peaking within me. "Of course you are. You may have a scar or two..."

"You're wrong," she insisted. "I'm going to die."

"Really, Bella," I said anxiously. "You'll be out of here in a few days. Two weeks at most."

She glared at me. "I may not die now...but I'm going to die sometime. Every minute of the day, I get closer. And I'm going to get OLD."

And, there it was. Bella wanting me to give her immortality to prevent her from living a normal full human life. What had I done? Why had I pursued this? How could she not see what she was actually asking? I frowned as I processed what she had said, pressing my fingers to my temples and closing my eyes. "That's how it's supposed to happen. How it should happen. How it would have happened if I didn't exist – and I SHOULDN'T EXIST."

Bella snorted in response, causing me to open my eyes in surprise. "That's stupid. That's like going to someone who's just won the lottery, taking their money and saying, 'Look, let's just go back to how things should be. It's better that way.' And I'm not buying it."

That analogy irritated me, and I growled, "I'm hardly a lottery prize."

"That's right," she agreed. "You're much better." Was this woman never going to see things as they were? Was she trying to drive me insane? I had reached the end of my tether regarding the matter, and would no longer discuss it. As much as I loved Bella Swan, I would never grant her this particular wish, and no matter her argument my position would never waver.

I rolled my eyes and set my lips. "Bella, we're not having this discussion anymore. I refuse to damn you to an eternity of night and that's the end of it."

Instead of agreeing, she continued on relentlessly. "If you think that's the end, then you don't know me very well," she warned. "You're not the only vampire I know."

My heart lurched and her statement shot through me as if I had received a large dose of fear and pain. "Alice wouldn't dare," I seethed, my expression causing a brief flash of uncertainty to cross her beautiful face. I knew I had frightened her, and as much as I never wanted to, if that would make her see things clearly, then a good dose of fear may be just what the doctor ordered.

"Alice already saw it, didn't she?" she asked insightfully. Of course she would suspect that of Alice, and I had no doubt that even if Alice did not tell Bella of her visions in so many words, that Bella would ascertain certain things to be fact anyway, under the circumstances. "That's why the things she says upset you. She knows I'm going to be like you...someday."

"She's wrong," I snapped. "She also saw you dead, but that didn't happen either." Not yet, anyway.

"You'll never catch ME betting against Alice," she stated, bristling in response.

We stared at each other for a very long time, the beeping and whirring of the machines the only thing to break the silence, the clock on the wall ticking by relentlessly, telling me I was running short of options. I realised that I was not going to get anywhere with her on this matter. I was positive she made that same realisation in regards to my position.

"So where does that leave us?" she wondered.

I chuckled humourlessly. "I believe it's called an IMPASSE."

She sighed heavily. "Ouch," she muttered in response, her pain bringing me back to the here and now, and inviting me to change the subject.

"How are you feeling?" I asked, eyeing the button for nurse.

"I'm fine," she replied unconvincingly.

"I don't believe you," I said gently, knowing that she was covering up her pain.

"I'm not going back to sleep," she said stubbornly.

"You need to rest. All this arguing isn't good for you."

"So give in," she said.

"Nice try," I said as I reached for the button.

"No!" she squeaked. I chose to ignore her protest, and though I felt her anger roll off her, I knew that she needed her rest. I needed her to recover, and to get back to her life as quickly as was humanly possible.

"Yes?" came a voice from the speaker on the wall.

"I think we're ready for more pain medication," I said calmly, ignoring Bella's furious expression.

"I'll send in a nurse," the bored voice said.

"I won't take it," Bella promised.

I looked up toward the bag of fluids hanging beside the bed and said, "I don't think they're going to ask you to swallow anything."

Bella's heart rate started to climb as I looked at her once more, concerned. The fear was there, written all over her face, and I wanted more than anything to allay her negative feelings. "Bella, you're in pain. You need to relax so you can heal. Why are you being so difficult? They're not going to put any more needles in you now."

"I'm not afraid of the needles," she mumbled. "I'm afraid to close my eyes."

I smiled widely at her realising what she was actually saying. She did not want to be apart from me any more than I wanted to be apart from her. I took her heated face between my palms, my desire conquering the fear, frustration, anger and doubt, and said simply, "I told you I'm not going anywhere. Don't be afraid. As long as it makes you happy, I'll be here."

And then for the first time since she had been in this hospital, her face broke into the most glorious of smiles, lighting up her eyes, and making my breath hitch. "You're talking about forever, you know." Her words stunned me for a moment, filling me with desire.

I chose to keep the moment light, rather than kiss her or argue on her interpretation of forever. I reluctantly released my grasp on her and said, "Oh you'll get over it – it's just a crush."

She shook her head in disbelief and said, "I was amazed Renee swallowed that one. I know YOU know better." Indeed I did. I would never tell Bella that Renee chose to believe her because it made the entire situation easier to deal with. It also made me realise that Bella was human, and prone to changing her mind, and thought it would break my heart if she were to ever fall out of love with me, I knew that it was more than probable that it could happen.

"That's the beautiful thing about being human," I said wistfully. "Things change."

Her eyes narrowed in challenge. "Don't hold your breath," she said as I heard approaching footfalls.

I could not help but burst into a fit of laughter at her inadvertent joke, when the nurse came in brandishing a syringe.

"Excuse me," she said brusquely to me, silencing my laughter.

I got up and strode over to the end of the small room and leaned against the wall. I folded my arms and waited while Bella kept her eyes on me, her expression still apprehensive. I met her gaze calmly, wishing that Jasper had been here throughout our entire conversation and knowing how much easier things would have been to handle.

_That boy is giving me the creeps! He's so intense! _I smiled inwardly at the nurse's understandable response to me.

"Here you go, honey." The nurse smiled as she injected the medicine into the tube. "You'll feel better now."

"Thanks," Bella mumbled unenthusiastically.

"That ought to do it," she muttered as Bella's eyelids drooped. I nodded towards her courteously as she turned and gave me a disapproving glare. She snorted to herself, quickly walked toward the door and left the room without a word.

I realised I didn't have much time before Bella would be sedated once more, and had no idea when she would wake. I was by her side in an instant once the door had closed, touching her beautiful face, wanting to touch so much more.

"Stay," she slurred.

"I will," I promised, her stupefied smile making me grin. "Like I said, as long as it makes you happy...as long as it's what's best for you," I rephrased, hoping that she would not pick up my evolving promise.

Bella's head shook slightly as if she was struggling to break through the medication, but it was of no use. "S not the same thing," she mumbled incoherently.

I could not help but laugh in response. Even in a drug induced state, she did not miss a thing. "Don't worry about that now, Bella. You can argue with me when you wake up."

"Kay," she said, her goofy smile disappearing under the haze of the medication.

I wanted her to know how I felt, and no matter how much we had argued today, one thing had not changed, nor would it ever.

I leaned in closer, putting my lips to the shell of her beautiful pink ear. "I love you," I whispered.

"Me too."

"I know," I said, laughing once more at her charming response.

She turned her head slightly, her lidded eyes searching for me. I knew what she wanted, and immediately gave her what I craved just as much as she did. I pressed my lips gently to hers, the searing heat and softness of them beyond compare as her scent surrounded me, comforted me. Then, a moment of clarity hit me like a bolt from the blue. So many things had changed in these last few days. Her scent, though still mouth-wateringly appealing, was resistible. I could handle being near her without wanting to kill her, and as more potent desires took over the thirst, it gave me the confidence to know that I would not, could not kill her. If ever I was going to do it, I would have done it in that ballet studio. That event had become a rite of passage for me...a test. And now that I had passed that test I knew one thing. Where there was life, there was hope. I continued to kiss her gently as I thought, wanting more than anything to take her in my arms and crush her lips to mine. That would have to wait, and my heart was suddenly filled with joy in the knowledge that I would have the opportunity to kiss my love beyond today.

As I reluctantly released my lips from hers, I made further realisations. I realised that I had not had to decide anything today. Bella had taken away any thoughts of other alternatives other than us staying together, and I had no way of resisting what she desired most, for it was the same thing I desired. I knew it was a risk to pursue things beyond today, but now I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was a risk worth taking.

What was life without love anyway? An empty, meaningless existence. Who was I to deprive Bella of love, especially after what she had gone through to preserve what she held most dear to her heart? What sort of man was I to assume that she would accept my leaving her and move on, or that my family would accept Bella being cast aside? Why was it always about what I saw as the right thing to do...the right thing in my mind doing nothing but condemning Bella, my family and myself to a lifetime of misery?

Bella Swan was my saviour, I realised. She had, after all, rescued me from an eternity of merely existing, and shown me a life that was worth fighting for. One that I would give my soul for, if only I had one to give. One that I would sacrifice everything to protect. And now, she had shown me that she was willing to fight to protect these things just as fiercely as I.

"Thanks," she whispered.

"Anytime," I replied, grinning in satisfaction, my realisations making me feel lighter than air, and leaving me to ponder for a better and brighter future.

"Edward," she said, struggling to say my name.

"Yes?"

"I'm betting on Alice," she said finally before her beautiful brown eyes fluttered closed and she finally succumbed to the medication, Bella taking my heart with her into her dreamless slumber.

**A/N: Well, time is drawing near. Only the Epilogue to come...and I'm feeling all teary eyed! Show me the love by reviewing! I need cheering up! I'M SO SADDO! WAAAAAAAH!**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Well...this is it :( It is going to be a MONSTER epilogue! I'm going to keep writing until the end, and not keep you waiting so it will probably be the largest chapter I've written! **

**I would like to take the opportunity to thank you all so very much for supporting my story and encouraging me to keep going with it...not only with Midnight Sun but the rest of the entire series! Doing the rest of the series from Edward's point of view is a seriously big commitment and as much as I would love to do that, I am uncertain that I can commit the amount of time that it would take to do all three. (It took me 6 months to complete this as it is! LOL). But, down the track...well you never know, do you?**

**There are too many of you to thank, and I have individually thanked you in previous chapters...so here's what I would like to do. MWAH! MWAH! MWAH! XXX I'm sending out a million hugs and kisses to you all for reading my story. I feel truly humbled by your response to this and will never forget my first ever foray into writing a multi chapter story, nor will I forget my faithful readers and reviewers for joining me on this most enjoyable journey. You are so very special, each and every one of you, and I hope you continue to read my stories!**

**So, without further adieu, grab yourself a cuppa, sit back, relax and enjoy the final roller coaster ride that is Edward Anthony Cullen's version of Twilight from his very emotional and self-deprecating point of view, my fellow readers!**

**DEDICATION: THIS EPILOGUE IS DEDICATED TO MY FATHER. HE SURVIVED CANCER LAST YEAR, AND ENCOURAGED ME TO WRITE EVEN WHEN HE WAS SUFFERING THROUGH HIS OWN PAIN AND ILLNESS. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY DADDY!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own characters of Twilight. However, Edward's thoughts of events in Midnight Sun are mine, at least from when he took Bella to the meadow! hehehehe **

**EPILOGUE**

**EPOV**

Things were...good. Let me rephrase. They were...remarkable. Stupendous. Glorious. Magnificent. No matter the adjective I conjured within my mind, no words could describe the way I felt right now. Events that had led up to this very point in time had been, suffice to say, life-changing to the utmost. Life-changing not only for Bella Swan, but her family, my family and I...and the events that had occurred thus far had forever left their indelible mark on us all, altering those involved beyond recognition. I, for example, had left behind the persona of a vampire who had thirsted for Bella's blood and craved to kill her, and emerged as a man who happened to be a vampire...and one who now knew unequivocally what he wanted in life.

The sun had finally set on this most recent of traumas, which had spawned a plethora of possibilities. Possibilities which were both exciting and frightening. Exciting, because we had all come through these events relatively unscathed, and frightening because we were now exploring unchartered territory, and the stakes were even higher because of that fact. But for all that, life had become not only bearable thanks to Isabella Marie Swan, but fruitful and bountiful...which was an entirely new experience for the likes of me, and as much as I knew I did not deserve to avail myself of these bounties, I was thankful for them nonetheless. I was a man in love, after all, and I could not imagine life affording me any more gifts than I had already had the honour of being blessed with. Ah yes, I was truly a lucky man.

My family had also been changed forever, this experience giving them the opportunity to love a human being, and to accept her into our cloistered world. Although I knew that some of my family were more accepting of Bella than others, none of their lives would ever be the same. Love had conquered all...in the truest sense of the word. Our strange worlds had collided and had resulted in our lives being irrecoverably changed.

Then, of course, there was the effect on Bella's family. Two days after Bella had first woken up in hospital, we had all arrived home safe and well after having bid a fond farewell to Renee, sending her back to her new and exciting life with Phil. She was saddened to leave her only daughter, but had reluctantly conceded defeat the day Bella woke in hospital. I had no doubt in my mind that she loved her daughter with all of her heart, but Renee respected the fact that Bella was a mature young woman who wished to make her own choices in life. For that, I was forever grateful. Grateful not only to Renee for allowing her daughter to return to Forks, but also to Bella for choosing to love me, to keep me in her life...to cherish me. As much as I did not believe that a higher power existed for the likes of me, I felt it deep within me, from blood to bones, that something beyond my control had been at work here.

Not only had the way been made clear for Bella to return home to Charlie, but it appeared that the immediate danger posed by Victoria was gone...for the foreseeable future anyway. Alice had assured us that she would keep watch for any decision that Victoria would make, and we were certain that any move she made to come back to town would be thwarted by Alice's visions and our ability to detect her familiar scent from a hundred miles away. We hoped that Victoria would never again return to darken our doorstep, and were pleased that Laurent had headed to Denali to pursue what we hoped would be a positive lifestyle change for himself. We had been in regular contact with the clan over these past weeks and though Laurent struggled to embrace their way of life, he made for a good companion to them nonetheless. That is, when he was not wandering from them as he sometimes did. Kate's explanation of his errant behaviour was that he felt guilty about his apparent inability to feed on animals and would therefore venture out and hunt alone, only to return and make futile attempts to make amends and adopt their way of life once more. Irina and Tanya did not know what to make of him, and for that reason I was uncertain as to how long he would continue to persist there, or how much longer the coven would tolerate his behaviour. Whatever the obstacles that may hamper them living in harmony I hoped that, for all concerned, things would somehow work out for them all.

Peace reigned supreme in the small town of Forks, Washington, and I had never felt so content...so relieved of that fact. Well, to be more succinct, peace reigned among its citizens, between my family and Bella and I. There was one person, however, that I still had to work very hard on to convince...a person that I had craved a relationship with since Bella had become a part of my life, and the last person who would ultimately accept me into his. Charlie Swan. Charlie had been occupied with Carlisle investigating the murders committed at the hand of Victoria, and though he worked closely with my father, things were still strained between us when we arrived home. I was fortunate in one respect. Charlie had finally acknowledged that I was part of his daughter's life and as much as he was wary of our relationship, he respected his daughter enough to allow her to make her own choices.

Of course, Charlie Swan blamed me for Bella's near-miss. How could he not? How could he feel anything but anger and contempt toward me? Though he was not privy to the facts behind the simple and very real truth behind Bella's state, since our return he had continued to blame me for her predicament. After all, if not for me, Bella would not have left home in the first place and I was not about to disagree with his conclusions, nor defy his wishes. He demanded penance, and penance he would have. I respected him for standing his ground and being a father to his daughter, and though his punishment included a strict regime of visiting hours for me and curfews for his daughter, it mattered not. Charlie Swan had laid down the law and I respectfully accepted his decision without argument. If I was in his position and Bella were my daughter, I honestly don't know if I would have made as many concessions as he had.

Over the ensuing weeks after our return to Forks, Charlie and I had begun to establish an unspoken understanding between us. We had briefly discussed the investigations and had mutually agreed to keep the murders a secret from Bella for her own protection, and now that Victoria had left town and the safety of the citizens of Forks had been restored, I was pleased with that decision.

During our discussions, we also agreed that as long as I followed his rules, he told me I would be permitted to continue to see Bella. I obeyed his rules to the letter, never allowing my visits to run over time nor allowing Bella's curfews to be broken. The tension, though still there, was then partnered with an emerging mutual respect, and I could not have been happier. I was allowed to be part of Bella's life and no matter the condition of that, I was happy for it regardless, and inch by agonising inch, I felt as though I was getting somewhere with Charlie, albeit slowly.

I was more than relieved that we had begun to return to a more human life and routine. We had all returned to school, and though Bella's leg was in a cast, she had managed to return earlier than expected, with me aiding her. In a matter of a week, and with the assistance of her friends and me, she had also caught up with her schoolwork, to the delight of her father. Her friends were all very supportive, and even Jessica's thoughts had softened somewhat after Mike had begun to pay her a little more attention.

I was standing in the forest, hunting with Alice, pondering all that had happened thus far, smiling broadly as I did so.

"You know, Edward. You just missed a huge buck over there. What's the matter with you?" she asked as she dropped the body of her second kill of the hunt and disposed of the lifeless corpse, slowly rising out of her crouched position.

"Oh, nothing. I'm just a little distracted. I still can't believe how things have turned out, Alice."

"Yeh, yeh I know. You're in love...life's perfect...blah blah blah," she said as she rolled her eyes but at the same time gave me a small smile, my only hunting companion causing me to break into a roar of laughter. I also knew that the rest of the family were hesitant to hunt with me because of my sickeningly happy demeanour. Right now they did not know what to make of it, and at times it made them feel quite uncomfortable.

Alice, as always, was the only person who could tolerate me for the most part. Jasper avoided me like the plague, his frustration that I would somehow descend into my usual melancholia causing him to become confused. He had never seen me quite like this...quite so buoyant...so human.

Emmett and Rose, on the other hand, I avoided as much as possible...Emmett because of his constant teasing and his inappropriately vulgar thoughts of what Bella and I should be doing, and Rose because well, she did not support my relationship with Bella at all. There was a glimmer of hope however. At one point after our arrival back home, I smelled Rose's scent near the truck as I arrived to watch Bella sleep, and realised that she had replaced the spark plugs and given the dinosaur a quick once over. Although she never admitted having done anything and had been careful to conceal her thoughts around me, I knew anyway. Rose did surprise me at times, and though she would never acknowledge it, I was certain that she was softening her stance in regards to Bella, in her own obtuse way.

Carlisle and Esme were nothing but supportive, but left me to deal with things as a mature young man should. Carlisle had finished his work with Charlie, and had whispered words of praise and encouragement to him as they worked, championing my cause on my behalf, and for that I was indebted to Carlisle. I did not think that I would have been allowed back in Bella's life so easily if it weren't for his efforts. Carlisle had also sat down with me and we conversed at length about my changed response to Bella's scent, and he was fascinated by my ever-evolving reaction to it.

"Come on, Edward, hurry up! I'd like to get home before we have to stay another night," Alice complained, bringing me back from my reverie.

"Fine, Alice," I said abruptly as a familiar scent crossed my sensitive nose and found its way to my tongue, causing the mild burn in my throat to intensify somewhat, but not where it was uncomfortable. I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, sensing that it was moving to the north of where I stood, its slow steady movements leading me to believe that it too was on the hunt.

I darted through the forest and finally came upon the sight of my favourite of all prey. Not in the mood for any tactical manoeuvres nor grandstanding, I took down the huge mountain lion quickly, sinking my teeth through his fur, drinking of him with little feeling of satisfaction, his blood nowhere near what I had tasted...once. As I quickly buried his lifeless corpse, I pondered further. Ever since returning to Forks, the blood of animals had been particularly hard to take after...Bella. As much as I hated to admit my weakness, there it was, and though I had nearly become immune to the smell of Bella's scent and blood, its taste had ruined my palate for the blood of anything else, leaving me so dissatisfied that I wondered if I would ever recover. It was just as well I found my favourite prey today of all days...that small mercy somehow making it easier to will myself to return to my vegetarian way of life, and I hoped that it would be the beginning of the long arduous process of becoming what I once was.

And then I thought about the present, and how we had returned to our lives and how the routine seemed to slip back in place as if nothing had occurred. Of course, recent events proved otherwise, but in some ways, it was as if we had never left. Fond memories of our time at Forks High School and my pivotal discovery of Bella's existence whirled through my mind, the ensuing thoughts and feelings flooding my body as I remembered EVERY SINGLE MOMENT that Bella and I had been together, from when we first met, to our tumultuous moments leading up to my revealing who I was, all through each night I spent with her, watching her as she slept, holding her, kissing her...to the trauma of James' arrival and subsequent impact upon our lives...and beyond that to the bliss that was our life now. My thoughts ended right up to the very last time I had been with Bella less than twenty four hours earlier, when I had accompanied my love to her classes all morning, relishing each and every moment with her, only to be forced to leave early and go hunting with Alice. I smiled as I recollected our last moments together, where I farewelled her outside the cafeteria, the two of us happy and in love and as devil-may-care as any other couple. I was enamoured by her, trapped in our own world where only the two of us existed, and had been especially oblivious to everything and everyone else except Bella since our return. Until now. I gasped in realisation as I recalled the poster that adorned the wall above the doorway to the cafeteria, just as Alice caught up with me.

"Of course! The prom! I will ask her upon my return," I exclaimed out loud, not caring that Alice was privy to my thoughts. Ah yes, the prom. The rite of passage that every human teen male and female is obligated to experience if they wish to have something to reminisce about of their school lives. A rite that I suspected Bella did not want any part of, but an experience that I was determined to give her, even under protest. I did not want my Bella to regret anything in life, for she stood to regret so much already. Meeting me would be something that I knew she would someday regret, so for now, I wanted to give her everything I possibly could to compensate for those things I would never be able to offer her. In short, I wanted her to be as human as possible for as long as was possible...to have as many human experiences as life could offer...and all before it was too late.

Alice's eyes suddenly glazed over with yet another of many visions that she had experienced since our return. All of Alice's visions had been nothing but pleasing of late, which made for an unusual but nonetheless welcome change.

"You can't tell her. She won't agree if you ask her now," Alice said after the vision played through her mind, one of Bella and I arguing about attending whilst standing near her truck. "You know she hates dancing."

"Well, this will require further thought," I said, my mind filled with confusion.

"It would be so much easier if she'd just co-operate. Silly Bella! She has no idea what she will be missing!" she complained in frustration.

"I agree. I don't want her to miss this, Alice. It won't be something she will get another chance to experience."

"Well just pick her up and drag her there...she won't be able to fight you," Alice said, laughing at the notion of me behaving like a Neanderthal.

"I am not going to make Bella do anything against her will," I answered seriously, frowning in disapproval at my sister's suggestion.

"Well, then just don't tell her until the last minute. Then she'll find it harder to say no," Alice suggested, pouting as she spoke and as her idea made its way through my mind, the vision began to change.

"It appears that you may be correct, Alice. I will have to keep Bella guessing as to where she will be going," I said, watching the vision blur and become difficult to see. I suddenly realised that I would also need to discuss this with Charlie in hopes that he would agree to lift Bella's curfew. "I will have to discuss this with Charlie." Finally, a clear picture of me going to the Police station and talking to Charlie flashed through Alice's mind, solidifying my plans.

"Oh, the prom! You're taking Bella to the prom!" she squealed excitedly, clapping her hands as I saw Bella, a vision of loveliness dressed in blue, smiling as I helped her out of my car.

"I guess I am," I replied, smiling widely but at the same time bemused, wondering how I was going to go about achieving the very difficult feat of keeping Bella guessing about where she was going.

"Oh don't worry. We're vampires. Of course we can keep Bella in the dark. We can all meet you there! Now, you'd better get going if you want to talk to Charlie before he gets home from work," Alice said, smiling like a giddy schoolgirl, knowing that she would be helping Bella dress for the event.

The vision meeting with my approval, I took off and ran, heading south and back towards town. "And don't forget...you have to keep this a secret from Bella!" she shrieked as her voice and thoughts faded in the distance. Joy coursed through me unbound, and I pushed through the soft earth beneath me, smiling as I ran. I was excited by the prospect of giving Bella another human experience, one which she would not get another chance to be part of and one that I would be privy to watching her experience.

I arrived at Forks Police Station in record time, elated by the thought that I would be escorting my love to the prom, and opened the door, walking toward Charlie's desk with a sense of trepidation. There he sat, on the phone to Bella, letting her know that he would be home shortly. He gave me a quizzical stare, and I shook my head and waved my hands, silently letting him know that I did not want Bella to know that I was there.

"Well I'll be home in around an hour honey. Bye," he said as he hung up.

"Edward," he said in his usual curt manner as he raised an eyebrow at me, absentmindedly shuffling papers on his desk.

"Sir," I replied, nodding my head respectfully.

"What can I do for you?" he asked impatiently as he cleared his throat. "I'm a little busy at the moment." He did not offer me a seat, and I sensed that he wished me to leave as soon as possible. I had not thought about how I would ask him what I was going to ask, but decided that it mattered not. Like ripping off a bandage quickly, I suspected that getting this over with as expeditiously as possible would be best.

"Sir, with your permission, I would like to accompany Bella to the prom," I said with reverence, my request causing him to cough a little louder this time. As I tried to read his tenor, I realised that his thoughts were beyond possessive.

"Of course you do," he said sarcastically, frowning at me in disapproval.

Ignoring his expression, I pressed on to argue my point further. "I was hoping that you would lift Bella's curfew so that I may escort her, and that you would be so kind as to not tell her of my intentions."

"Not tell her?" he asked, his eyes widened in surprise, focusing on the latter part of my request. "Don't you think that we've been keeping too many secrets from Bella lately?" I nodded quickly, agreeing with his opinion, but wanting more than anything to get Bella to the dance any way I could.

"Yes I do. I don't wish to lie to her any more than you do, but I know that Bella does not like to dance. I also suspect that if I ask her in advance, she may say yes, and then change her mind at the last moment."

"Oh, yes, right," Charlie replied, giving me an amused smile as he nodded his head. He, more than most, knew of Bella's aversion to dancing. "I see your dilemma."

"Yes, sir," I whispered, contrite, waiting for him to decide what to do.

He sighed heavily, his thoughts expressing defeat mixed with a little compassion and irritation, and his smile disappeared. "Edward, I can't say I've been altogether happy about your...attachment to Bella, and what your presence in her life has caused. It's concerning that someone her age to be this involved with one person. I want Bella to experience being a teenage girl in every way possible. You know, to spend time with her friends as well..."

"As do I," I interrupted, sensing his weakening resolve. "All I've ever wanted is to make Bella happy, sir, and for her to have a normal, teenage life. It's what she deserves..." I said, staring over his shoulder at the blank wall behind him briefly, wistfully.

My words and expressive tone of voice made me sound every one of my hundred plus years of age, but I only realised that after they had left my lips. He stared at me with a sense of confusion, my facade dropping enough to make him see me a little more clearly than I was comfortable with. "Well as with all of us teenagers, Bella's friends are important to her just as mine are to me. And of course all of her friends will be attending as well," I added, hoping it made me come off a little more teen-like, the attendance of Bella's friends being a valid argument.

"Well if you'd let me finish, I was about to say that as much as I find your relationship...intense, I know that you only have good intentions, even though they're sometimes a little misguided. You know, Carlisle can be very persuasive when he wants to be," he said, frowning as if he felt like he had been conned.

"I appreciate that, sir," I said as I silently thanked Carlisle once more for him championing my cause.

"Okay, now remember you can call me Charlie," he said softly, smiling at me, his thoughts ones of reluctant acceptance.

"Of course, as you wish Charlie. So does that mean you give your permission?" I asked, unable to hide my mixed emotions of exuberance combined with fear.

"Yes, I give my permission. And thank you for coming to me about this, I appreciate it. You're alright kid," he said as he stood to his feet.

"No, thank you, Charlie. You have no idea what this means to me, and what it will mean to Bella," I said humbly as the plans for the prom began to formulate in my head. As much as Alice's predictions had shown that I would in fact accompany Bella to the prom, I was still elated that I had managed to get Charlie's permission to escort her. Barriers were slowly breaking down between us, and today seemed to help that to occur. I could not be more pleased about that fact. I also noted that he seemed to be more accepting of me and my presence in his daughter's life, and that if I kept working on my relationship with Charlie, things would only improve from here for all concerned.

"Oh, and Edward. Good luck with trying to keep Bella in the dark about this and getting her to the prom," Charlie said, snickering as he picked the paperwork up from his desk.

"I'm sure I will manage something," I said, my mind going into overdrive as I considered exactly how I would achieve such a feat.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I have to finish this paperwork," he said dismissively shuffling the pages in his hands as he waited for me to leave.

"Yes of course. Thank you again, Charlie," I said as I smiled at him and turned toward the door and walked outside, as rain suddenly fell, washing me clean of all my troubles.

Within hours of arriving home from hunting Alice had purchased an Armani tuxedo for me to wear and had selected a stunning dark blue dress for Bella. Every time I saw the vision of Bella in her prom dress, feelings that were foreign to me welled within, threatening to erupt and bring me undone. Feelings that were a mixture of elation, reverence, desire...so many rolled into one that no words could describe them were now a part of my everyday existence...and I was quickly becoming addicted to them. Things were, indeed, falling into place.

000

Time passed quickly, and no sooner had I secured Charlie's permission to escort his only daughter to the prom, than the day had arrived. Alice had brought Bella to our home, somehow convincing her to come over so that she could help Bella get ready. Of course, she had told Bella that what was happening today was a special occasion, but one that was a surprise. Alice had assured Bella that she had seen visions of today's events and that Bella would be pleased with what was to come. I was quite shocked that Alice had managed to convince Bella to comply with every request she made of her so easily, causing me to wonder what was going on in that confounding mind of hers. I had spent the week wondering what did she thought was going on, and as she had not given any indication to Alice as to what indeed she thought the surprise was, I was at a loss. It didn't stop her from attempting to extract information from me, however, her interrogations becoming more determined, more frustrating as the time wore on.

Up until today, I had spent the entire time playing a game of evasion as she questioned me persistently, and when she became too difficult I would simply tell her I loved her and would kiss her. That, so it seemed, would distract her enough that she would cease her line of questioning and as much as I did not condone the purposeful use of my vampiric talents to manipulate my love, under the circumstances, I saw no other alternative. Charlie had also assured Bella during the entire time in unison with Alice, my family and I, that all was well, so she had no option but to agree to go along with our wishes.

I had spent the morning hunting, during which time Alice had picked up Bella and brought her to our home. With but an hour to pass before we were due to leave, I began pacing back and forth in my room as I listened to music, distracted by the fact that Bella was in the house but not being permitted to see her, less I wanted to feel the wrath of my sister. No matter what I did, nothing soothed me, and what little patience I did possess seemed to be vanishing with rapidity. Nothing would comfort me nor calm me until I had Bella Swan's arm looped in mine as I escorted her to the prom.

"Hey, man, stop with the pacing," Emmett said as he walked through the front door and blurred upstairs until he stood in the doorway of my room. "You're gonna wear a hole in the floor. Rose and I just got back, but the others are all still out." And then, he lowered his voice and whispered under his breath, "I'll try to keep Rose away from the house. She's not exactly jazzed that Bella's here, so I'll keep her in the garage working on the Jeep until you guys leave."

I nodded once, silently thanking him for keeping Rosalie at a distance. My muscles were tense and I literally ached for the next hour to pass. As much as I appreciated the family going hunting to give us some quiet time and to allow us to get ready, it did not relieve the tension that I now felt. I felt my lips curve into a small smile for a brief moment as I realised that any human boy would probably be going through the exact same experiences as he prepared to meet his date for the prom.

"Hey look at you! Anyone would think you're human with how nervous you are now," he said as if he had read my mind.

"Well we all know that's impossible Emmett. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get ready," I growled, and as he turned and headed downstairs, his final thoughts only served to irritate me further.

_Yeesh dude, maybe you need to seal the deal with Bella. Then maybe you won't be so uptight and jumpy all the time! _

I chose to ignore Emmett's comments, and instead continued to pace as I listened for any sound of Bella's voice or heartbeat. Alice, so it seemed, was keeping Bella extremely quiet, her voice the only one emanating from the bathroom, occasionally punctuated by Bella's moans of complaint and her elevated heartbeat. Whenever Bella protested, Alice would simply tell her that she had no memories of being human, and asked Bella not to ruin her vicarious fun. My sympathies were with my love. This was the first time she had experienced Alice dressing her like a doll, and as Bella was the first human that Alice had gotten her hands on to do so, she was no doubt overwhelmed by the entire experience.

_Edward, it's time for you to get dressed and head downstairs. Bella will be ready in ten minutes. _Finally!

I sighed heavily, relieved that I was moments away from being reunited with Bella and in a flash, I put on my tuxedo and tied my tie, staring at myself in the mirror as I did so. I brushed off an errant piece of lint from the jacket, and contemplated what had happened up until this very moment. "Thank you," I whispered under my breath as my eyes briefly glanced toward the heavens before I picked up the flowers and pins that Alice had placed on my dresser and turned to leave my room.

I took in a deep gasp and I basked in the glow of her as I watched her walk down the stairs...the goddess before me sent directly from the heavens. She was lovely in the blue off the shoulder dress, the wisps of chiffon and silk accentuating her perfect body, the blue highlighting the glorious tone of her skin and eyes. I had never seen more of her bare skin as I did now, Alice's visions not doing the vision of seeing her in the flesh justice. I swallowed thickly, lost for words as I waited for her to join me, my eyes grazing every inch of her beautiful form. She drew a small breath in surprise and stared seriously at me in return, her puzzled expression slowly turning into an angry stare of suspicion as she said under her breath, "You look nice." I knew why she was upset, but chose to ignore it as I took the flowers and pinned them into her beautiful, elaborately curled hair that ran down her back and over her shoulders in rivulets.

"Oh Bella...word cannot describe...you're breathtaking," I whispered into her ear in broken sentences as I saw the blush creep up over her face, the makeup that she wore unable to hide her reaction. I found myself spellbound by her beauty, and I silently stepped back and took her in, briefly glancing over her bare shoulder as I sensed Alice's presence.

"Thank you," I whispered lowly under my breath as I caught a glimpse of an extremely chuffed Alice, who stood at the top of the stairs staring proudly at the results of all her hard work.

_You're welcome. We'll see you there. I have to get ready!_

I nodded once and took Bella's warm hand in mine, bringing her arm to loop through my own as I slowly escorted her outside and down the stairs. Though her cast and Alice's choice of shoe hindered her speed, I didn't care. I was so elated that she was in my company now, and that I had gotten her this far, that not even her angered expression was going to dampen my mood.

As I opened the door to the car and helped Bella in, I secretly smiled to myself, knowing that my plan was falling into place. I also realised that it was finally time to reveal the surprise, and the nervous anticipation I now felt was nearly crippling me. I closed the door and took in a deep breath while I blurred to the driver's side. Bella had still not offered a word of question, her anger now rolling off her in waves, and as I started the car and headed down the driveway, she finally opened her beautiful red lips and spoke.

"At what point exactly are you going to tell me what's going on?" she huffed grumpily.

"I'm surprised that you haven't figured it out yet," I said, giving her a mocking smile. In response, her breath caught in her throat. I was pleased that she was no longer keeping her thoughts to herself, and was more than amused that I had confounded her thus far.

"I did mention that you looked very nice, didn't I?" she asked distractedly as it dawned on me that my scent and demeanour had momentarily diverted her attention from her purpose.

"Yes," I said, grinning as I felt her eyes flow over my body. I was in heaven. There was no doubt in my mind about it. I glanced at her, and as her heart began to race, her expression became nervous.

"I'm not coming over anymore if Alice is going to treat me like Guinea Pig Barbie when I do," she complained.

Just as she spoke, my phone rang. I reached inside my jacket pocket and retrieved it, looking briefly at the caller ID before answering. I was somewhat surprised that Charlie was calling and prayed that all was well.

"Hello, Charlie," I said warily as I waited for him to speak.

"Charlie?" Bella said, frowning.

"Edward, I just thought I'd let you know that a boy named Tyler has arrived to take Bella to the prom," he said, his voice filled with confusion.

I felt my eyes widen with disbelief, and a grin spread across my face in realisation.

"You're kidding!" I said, suddenly roaring with laughter.

"Does it sound like I'm kidding?" Charlie replied, and I sensed that he was suppressing a laugh.

Bella's face was suddenly filled with panic and confusion as she demanded, "What is it?"

Oh this was just too perfect. My day was getting better by the minute. After weeks of Bella and I outwardly showing the rest of the school that we were in fact together, that boy still had the nerve to assume that because he did not give Bella the opportunity to say no to him, he was still her date for the prom?

"Why don't you let me talk to him?" I suggested with pleasure. I could not wait to give this boy a piece of my mind, and confirm to him that Bella Swan was indeed mine.

"Okay, sure. I'll put him on the phone," Charlie said as I heard the smile in his voice, then waited for a few seconds for Tyler to speak.

"Hello?" he said, his voice filled with confusion.

"Hello, Tyler, this is Edward Cullen," I said in my most friendly tone, all the while tinging it with menace. As I spoke his name, I saw Bella stare at herself, her eyes studying her dress.

"Oh, hi Edward. What's doing?" he asked nervously as he tried but failed to remain calm.

"I'm sorry if there's been some kind of miscommunication, but Bella is unavailable tonight," I said, dropping my friendly facade.

"Oh really?" he replied, bristling at my manner, trying to push through his nerves with arrogance.

I reacted to his response, wanting nothing more than to make things crystal clear, and to ensure that he understood that his pursuit of Bella, tonight or any other night was unacceptable from this day forward. "To be perfectly honest, she'll be unavailable every night as far as anyone besides myself is concerned. No offense. And I'm sorry about your evening," I said, my voice venomous and devoid of one bit of sympathy as I snapped the phone shut without bothering to listen to another word from that foolish boy. Unable to suppress my satisfied smirk, I put my phone back in my pocket and drove on.

And then, Bella's scent hit me hard as her heart raced and as I turned to look at her, her face and neck flushed, and her eyes suddenly filled with tears. I stared at her with a look of surprise, concerned that I had gone overboard with my tirade towards Tyler, and had upset her.

"Was that last part a bit too much? I didn't mean to offend you."

"You're taking me to the PROM?" she yelled, ignoring my statement. Ah, finally! The penny had dropped! Though I knew she would be upset, I did not predict the force of her reaction, nor had Alice. In fact, Tyler must have decided at the last minute to go to her house, as Alice had not seen him making an appearance there at all. Be that as it may, I was determined to get Bella to the prom and in response I pressed my lips together and narrowed my eyes.

"Don't be difficult, Bella," I said as Bella's eyes flashed to the window, no doubt realising that our journey half way done already. I pressed my foot on the accelerator, errant thoughts of her opening the door and rolling out crossing my mind.

"Why are you doing this to me?" she asked in horror as if she were being tortured. And then, I wondered. What EXACTLY did she think we were going to do?

I gestured my hand to my tuxedo and said, "Honestly, Bella, what did you think we were doing?"

Her faced was filled with mortification and her heart raced. Her blush continued to remain on her face, and the angry tears which brimmed in her eyes finally spilled down her beautiful cheeks. Why wouldn't she tell me what she was thinking? She wiped her tears away quickly before I had the chance to respond, and my patience was wearing thin at the same time.

"This is completely ridiculous. Why are you crying?" I demanded in frustration.

"Because I'm MAD!" she snapped. Oh, how I wished I possessed Jasper's talents instead of my own!

"Bella," I said, turning my glance into an intense stare, willing Bella to calm herself.

"What?" she muttered, suddenly distracted by my talents.

"Humour me," I insisted as I watched for further signs of distress. Instead, to my relief, her heart rate slowed and the fury in her moistened eyes began to subside. I was a manipulative person, there was no doubt about it, but it was important that she calm down.

"Fine," she said, pouting, her adorable face making me want to take her in my arms. I was more than relieved, and felt that the worst was over. "I'll go quietly. But you'll see, I'm way overdue for more bad luck. I'll probably break my other leg. Look at this shoe! It's a death trap!" she whined as she moved her beautiful leg toward me. And as I stared at her leg, my eyes followed the smooth planes of her calf muscle down to the high heeled shoe which had ribbons on the top that wound their way around her slender ankle.

"Hmmm," I moaned. "Remind me to thank Alice for that tonight." My thoughts were digressing as I imagined removing her shoe, taking her foot into one hand and massaging there, while my other hand traced its way up her smooth silken leg...

"Alice is going to be there?" she questioned, surprising me as she so often did, grateful that the subject of our conversation had shifted once more.

"With Jasper, and Emmett...and Rosalie," I admitted, hesitating as I watched for her response to my admission. She shifted in her seat and appeared nervous, but instead of acknowledging my mention of Rosalie's name, she kept the conversation civil and pressed on with another question.

"Is Charlie in on this?" she asked of me, her tone filled with suspicion. Indeed, Charlie was, for without his assistance neither I nor Alice saw this glorious night ever coming about. I hoped that Bella would forgive her father, his role pivotal in the success of this particular evening.

"Of course," I said, grinning at her and then chuckling, trying to keep the conversation light. "Apparently Tyler wasn't, though," I added, attempting to use humour to distract her.

Without a word, Bella gritted her teeth in response and as our journey came to an end, the sun setting through the thinning clouds told me that tonight was just beginning. I could not be more excited.

I killed the engine and got out of the car, approaching her door as quickly as was humanly acceptable, nearly jumping out of skin in anticipation. I held my hand out to take hers and in response, she sat stubbornly in her seat, arms folded, her expression suddenly smug. She knew that I could not forcibly remove her from the car. Not without attracting unwanted attention, as I noticed that the lot was filled with potential witnesses. I could not lose this battle of will. Not here. Not now. Not when I was so close to achieving my goal.

I sighed and said, "When someone wants to kill you, you're brave as a lion – and then when someone mentions dancing..." I said as I shook my head and waited for her to give in.

She swallowed heavily in response, and I that knew that she was still nervous, so I tried to reassure her. "Bella, I won't let anything hurt you – not even yourself. I won't let go of you once, I promise."

I watched her face closely as she considered my statement, and then, to my relief, all the worry seemed to drift from her face as if it were never there in the first place.

"There now," I said gently, "it won't be so bad." I leaned down and wrapped one arm around her waist, taking her hand and lifting her from the car, keeping her securely in my grasp. We were here, and she was a willing participant now, and I could not be a happier man.

I kept my arm tightly around her, supporting her as she slowly limped toward the school and through to the gym. Thoughts of every student invaded my mind as we approached the doorway to heaven, and as we entered, more than one male's thoughts were directed toward how breathtaking Bella was. I fought the urge to react to them, for I knew that I was the luckiest man here, without a doubt, and reasoned that those boys could not help but admire my Bella.

When we got inside, Bella giggled as she took in the sight of the room, the balloon arches and twisted garlands of pastel crepe paper on the walls somehow amusing her, and she remained oblivious to the envious stares of half of the population of the school, while the other half whispered thoughts of lust for her.

"This looks like a horror movie waiting to happen," she said, snickering.

"Well," I muttered as we slowly approached the ticket table. "There are MORE than enough vampires present," I said as my siblings' thoughts invaded my mind all at once.

_Well alright Edward! Bella's looking hot! _Emmett chimed in. _Hope you're prepared for a big night there bro!_

_Hmmm...well she does scrub up well for an insignificant little human. _Rosalie's thoughts were as venomous as ever.

_Oh Bella, we're going to be such great friends! I can't wait to dress her again! _Alice, as always, was her usual exuberant self.

_Well, well, Edward. Your girl is a might pretty one now ain't she? _Jasper's drawl was always at its thickest when in the presence of a beautiful girl.

I suppressed a smirk at their combined thoughts, and then made a decision. I would make a concerted effort to push all the white noise into the background of my mind, my intention to spend the rest of the evening focusing all my attention on Bella. I focused on blocking every thought in the room and creating our own little world once more, just as I had done in these past weeks with Bella. I watched Bella as she watched my siblings twirling on the dance floor, and waited for her to speak.

"Do you want me to bolt the doors so you can massacre the unsuspecting townsfolk?" she whispered conspiratorially.

"And where do you fit into that scheme?" I replied, glaring at her in accusation, knowing that she was attempting to find a way to distract me.

"Oh, I'm with the vampires, of course," she said.

"Anything to get out of dancing," I said, smiling reluctantly.

"Anything," she said as I bought our tickets and faced her toward the dance floor, feeling her feet dragging as we approached.

"I've got all night," I warned.

Losing patience, I eventually dragged her to the middle of the dance floor near where my siblings were, Bella watching them in horror as her insecurities about her lack of dancing prowess were written across her glorious face. "Edward. I HONESTLY can't dance!" she said in a whispered panic.

"Don't worry, silly. I CAN," I said reassuringly as I took her arms and put them around my neck, while at the same time I lifted her to slide my feet underneath hers. And then, I felt a rush of exultation as we danced together, the world slipping away as I waltzed with my love around the dance floor. I closed my eyes briefly, imagining that Bella and I were dancing at my prom, in my time, and that my mother was chaperoning us, watching us with pride as we glided across the dance floor...

"I feel like a five year old," she said after a few minutes of silence, laughing in exuberance, breaking through my flights of fancy.

"You don't look five," I said as I clutched her body to mine for a brief moment, the length of her body pressed against me. I let out a low groan in response, luckily so low that Bella would be unable to hear. Of course, someone heard me.

_Edward...we are in a public place. _Alice caught my eye and smiled at Bella, her thoughts somehow piercing my blockade, causing me to ease Bella back into her previous more publicly acceptable position. Bella smiled at my sister in return...appearing as though she was enjoying our dance. I was elated by that very thought.

"Okay, this isn't half bad," she admitted and just as everything was going wonderfully well, thoughts invaded my mind...thoughts that I did not welcome, but that screamed for my attention. Jacob Black was here, and he was not intending to leave until he had spoken to Bella, his thoughts filled with a tinge of lust as well as embarrassment for being sent here.

_Well if you'd been paying attention, you would have seen my vision! But it was very blurred... _

"Shutup Alice," I muttered in a low voice.

"What is it?" Bella asked as Jacob appeared in the doorway and headed our way.

I snarled under my breath, trying to remain in control as Jacob approached.

"BEHAVE!" Bella hissed.

_I can't believe he's making me talk to Bella. What am I supposed to say? Wow, Bella looks hot! God, what I wouldn't give to..._

"He wants to chat with you," I said scathingly as I heard his thoughts digress, hoping that if I spoke out loud he would not continue with them.

"Hey Bella, I was hoping you would be here," he said as he smiled at her and blushed under his darkened skin.

"Hi, Jacob. What's up?" Bella replied warmly as she tried to welcome him.

_Well, guess I'd better get this over with. Why on earth did I agree with dad that I would do this? Oh yeh that's right. For a master cylinder!_

"Can I cut in?" Jacob asked as he stared directly at me, and I noted that he had grown to my height now after having grown an incredible amount of inches.

I kept my composure, realising that if I did not concede now, that Jacob would only continue to seek out Bella until he had said his piece.

I carefully set Bella on her feet, and took a step back, allowing Jacob his request.

"Thanks," Jacob said amiably. I nodded in response, staring at Bella intently before I turned to walk away, my entire focus on the conversation that was about to take place.

_Who the hell is that moving in on my brother's girl? _

_Who does he think he is? Mauling my best friend like that!_

_It seems you've got a bit of competition there, Edward. She looks good with a human, doesn't she?_

_I know that if it was Alice, no way no how would I EVER let that boy near her!_

The thoughts of my siblings rocketed through my head, and I chose to push them back once more, closing my eyes briefly and focusing on Bella and Jacob as if they were the only two people in the room.

My fists clenched as I opened my eyes, finding that Jacob had put his hands around Bella's waist, while she reached up and placed her hands on his shoulders. As much as I knew that what they were doing was innocent and more than publicly acceptable, I could not help but feel pangs of jealousy radiate through my body. I truly felt helpless in this situation.

"Wow, Jake, how tall are you now?"

"Six two," he said smugly. _As tall as him, Bella._

I watched their body movements, and as they stood in one spot, swaying to the music, I realised that Bella was trying to keep an acceptable distance from him, all the while trying to be civil.

"So, how did you end up here tonight?" she asked him, her tone indicating that she already suspected why.

"Can you believe my dad paid me twenty bucks to come to your prom?" he admitted. _Sheesh is all this humiliation worth it?_

"Yes, I can," she muttered, confirming that she knew the gist of his visit. "Well, I hope you're enjoying yourself, at least. Seen anything you like?" Bella teased, nodding toward a group of girls lined up against the wall.

_Wow, and here's me thinking I was obvious! _

"Yeh," he sighed. "But she's taken."

He glanced down to meet Bella's gaze and then they both looked away at the same time, Bella's blush evidence that she knew to whom he was referring. My blood began to boil, and though I knew of Jacob's misguided but genuine feelings for Bella, his expressing them to her out loud made this particular situation all too real...all too difficult to deal with.

_She's so hot!_

"You look really pretty by the way," he said more sedately. Pretty? Bella was far more than pretty. This boy had the charm and expressive language of a gnat! I inhaled deeply, trying to remain composed as I continued to block out the thoughts of others.

Bella's blush deepened, if that were even possible, causing me to lick my lips with desire. I mentally berated myself from such distractions, focusing once more on their conversation. "Um, thanks. So why did Billy pay you to come here?" she said quickly, no doubt trying to change the subject.

_Oh, yeh. THAT. She's gonna think I'm insane, but here goes. _He looked away, his eyes briefly glancing at me, before he took a breath and spoke further.

"He said it was a 'safe' place to talk to you. I swear the old man is losing his mind." They both laughed weakly at his statement, and that caused me to tense. As much as I loved Bella, a friendship with Jacob could only complicate things, considering the treaty.

"Anyway, he said that if I told you something, he would get me that master cylinder I need," he said with a sheepish grin.

"Tell me then. I want you to get your car finished," Bella said, grinning at him, her selfless nature never ceasing to amaze me. My body coiled tightly in anticipation of exactly how much Jacob was going to say, but the potential to reveal too much and therefore cause him embarrassment was something that I hoped would work in my favour. I kept my expression serene as I slumped against the wall, and waited. Bella's glance caught mine at that moment as I stared at her beautiful face with intent, her expression one of awkward embarrassment.

"Don't get mad, okay?"

"There's no way I'll be mad at you Jacob," she assured him. "I won't even be mad at Billy. Just say what you have to."

_Oh I get it. Say what you have to and leave me alone. Why did I agree to do this? This sucks rocks!_

"Well – this is so stupid – I'm sorry Bella – he wants you to break up with your boyfriend. He asked me to tell you 'please'," he said, shaking his head in obvious disgust, irritated that his father had put him up to this.

"He's still superstitious, eh?" she asked with curiosity, trying to force a smile.

"Yeah. He was...kind of over the top when you got hurt down in Phoenix. He didn't believe..."

_He didn't believe that trumped up story that you all concocted! _

Bella's eyes narrowed in challenge as she said, "I fell."

"I know that," he replied all too quickly, dismissively.

"He thinks Edward had something to do with me getting hurt," she said angrily.

_Yeh, and he's been trying ever since to convince me it's true._

Jacob looked everywhere but into Bella's eyes, his awkward embarrassment obvious.

"Look, Jacob, I know Billy probably won't believe this, but just so you know," she said, causing Jacob to look at her, responding to Bella's earnest voice. "Edward really did save my life. If it weren't for Edward and his father, I'd be dead."

"I know," he claimed, his expression still awkward. _I hope you're telling the truth, Bella. _

"Hey I'm sorry you had to come do this, Jacob," Bella said apologetically. "At any rate, you get your parts, right?"

_After I tell you the rest._

"Yeah," he muttered, now upset with what he still needed to tell her.

She picked up on this fact and asked in disbelief, "There's more?"

_This is nuts! I can't do this!_

"Forget it," he mumbled. "I'll get a job and save the money myself." This was like watching a bad movie or soap opera, and more than anything I wanted to rush to Bella, push that BOY away and take her in my arms.

Bella glared at Jacob, no doubt as fed up as I was with this situation. "Just spit it out, Jacob."

"It's so bad."

"I don't care. Tell me," she insisted.

"Okay...but, geez, this sounds bad," he said, shaking his head. "He said to tell you, no to WARN you, that – and this is his plural, not mine." He lifted one hand from Bella's waist and made quotation marks in the air, and quoted his father verbatim. "'We'll be watching.'" He watched Bella warily for a reaction.

She laughed out loud, her response surprising both Jacob and myself. _Oh great. Now she'll take me real seriously!_

"Sorry you had to do this, Jake," she snickered.

"I don't mind THAT much," he said, grinning in relief as his eyes raked quickly over her dress. _Wow she's the prettiest girl in this room! _"So, should I tell him you said to butt the hell out?" he asked hopefully. I knew he was hopeful for more than a positive answer that particular question. He held out hope that she would not only acquiesce with his father's request and break up with me, but also fall under his spell. I hissed lowly under my breath, staring at him with such jealousy that I suddenly fantasised about picking him up and throwing him against the wall, breaking every bone in his six foot two body.

Of course, I remained where I was, knowing that Bella would handle things diplomatically, recalling how well she dealt with members of the Black family last time she encountered them.

"No," she sighed. "Tell him I said thanks. I know he means well," she said as the song ended and she dropped her arms from his shoulders, her actions cueing them to end their conversation. I could not be more relieved that she would be in my arms once more.

_Oh, not already! I want to..._

His hands stayed on her waist, creating yet another awkward moment. He glanced at Bella's injured leg and said, "Do you want to dance again? Or can I help you get somewhere?"

That was the final straw. I was immediately by her side, needing to hold her once more...needing him to release her. "That's all right, Jacob. I'll take it from here," I said, holding my tongue, wanting more than anything to say so much more.

Jacob flinched in response and stared wide-eyed at me.

"Hey, I didn't see you there," he mumbled. _Great. The hero returns. I'm out of here! _"I guess I'll see you around, Bella," he said, conceding defeat. He stepped back and waved half-heartedly, causing Bella to smile.

"Yeah, I'll see you later."

"Sorry," he reiterated, apologising to Bella again for the situation he had placed himself in. He turned for the door, his thoughts still digressing to a ridiculous level as he berated himself for showing his face here.

I wound my arms around Bella as the next song started, and I slow danced with my love to an up-tempo song. I didn't care. We were in our own world once more, and nothing else existed except her warm skin, her scent and her beating heart.

"Feeling better?" she teased.

"Not really," I said tersely, the tension still coiled within me.

"Don't be mad at Billy," she sighed. "He just worries about me for Charlie's sake. It's nothing personal." Indeed. Though what she said was correct, I knew that young Jacob Black would very much like to make things...personal.

"I'm not mad at Billy," I corrected in a clipped voice. "But his son is irritating me."

Bella pulled back to look at me, and her eyes took in my serious expression as we suddenly stopped dancing.

"Why?" Why indeed.

"First of all, he made me break my promise."

She stared at me in confusion. She was impervious to his advances, I realised, and that caused me to smile. "I promised I wouldn't let go of you tonight," I explained.

"Oh. Well I forgive you."

"Thanks. But there's something else," I said as I felt my brow crease. I did not want to reveal all of Jacob's errant thoughts, but there WAS something that I needed to correct, so that Bella would know the truth about how truly striking she looked tonight.

"He called you PRETTY," I said, my frown deepening. "That's practically an insult, the way you look right now. You're much more than beautiful."

She laughed in response and said, "You might be a little biased."

"I don't think that's it. Besides, I have excellent eyesight." And I knew that even now, Bella was being watched, adored by more than one male in the room, and though Mike was on the arm of Jessica, his thoughts were still filled with lust toward my Bella. It would seem that Jacob Black and Mike Newton were competing to win first prize to be the most irritating teenage boys in history.

I held Bella and twirled her as we began to dance again, her feet on mine as I held her close, showing Mike in no uncertain terms, that SHE WAS MINE.

"So are you going to explain the reason for all of this?" she asked.

I looked down at my love, searching the depths of her eyes, confused. I needed to be alone with Bella, thoughts of those around me including my siblings pushing through my head once more. We danced past Jessica and Mike, their curious expressions and thoughts filled with lust and jealousy. Jessica waved at Bella, and she smiled at her in return. I realised that those two particular people thoroughly deserved one another. Angela, the only girl among Bella's friends that was truly genuine and kind, looked blissfully happy in the arms of Ben Cheney. I was so happy that Emmett and I had played a small part in getting those two together. We danced past the others, and my siblings all smiled as we twirled past them, and I was so desperate to have Bella alone with me that I danced a little faster than was humanly possible. No-one appeared to notice, to my relief.

And then we were outside in the cool, dim light of the fading sunset, leaving the din of the hoards behind us. As soon as I was certain we were alone, I swung Bella up into my arms and carried her across the dark grounds until I reached a bench beneath the shadow of the madrone trees. I sat down and cradled her to my chest, longing for this day to never end. The moon had already risen, visible through the clouds, and I felt a sudden sadness, my mouth hardening as I looked skyward.

"The point?" she asked, prompting me softly.

I continued to stare at the moon, the sadness overwhelming me now as I realised that every day, Bella would be one step closer to death, one step closer to taking her away from me...until eventually she would leave me behind to spend the rest of eternity living out my existence as if it were hell on earth.

"Twilight again," I said in frustration as reality hit, time suddenly my new enemy, knowing of the sacrifices she would be making to be with me. "Another ending. No matter how perfect the day is, it always has to end."

"Some things don't have to end," she muttered through clenched teeth.

I sighed, knowing her thoughts without having to read her mind, her frustration rolling off her. I pulled my gaze away from the haunting moon and looked into her soulful eyes.

"I brought you to the prom," I said slowly, finally answering her question, "because I don't want you to miss anything. I don't want my presence to take anything away from you, if I can help it. I want you to be HUMAN. I want your life to continue as it would have if I'd died in nineteen-eighteen like I should have," I said wistfully, my words causing Bella to shudder.

"In what strange parallel dimension would I EVER have gone to prom of my own free will? If you weren't a thousand times stronger than me, I would never have let you get away with this," she argued.

I forced a smile, but was anything but happy. "It wasn't so bad, you said so yourself."

"That's because I was with you," she said, her voice honey-like in its tone.

We were quiet for a moment, and I stared at the moon once more, searching every crater for an answer to our situation, feeling Bella's eyes bore into me as I recalled that I had not found out what she thought we were actually going to be doing tonight.

"Will you tell me something?" I asked finally, glancing down at the love of my life with a smile.

"Don't I always?"

"Just promise you'll tell me," I insisted, now grinning at her.

"Fine," she huffed.

"You seem honestly surprised when you figured out that I was taking you here," I began.

"I WAS," she interjected.

"Exactly," I agreed. "But you must have had some other theory...I'm curious – what did you THINK I was dressing you up for?"

She pursed her lips, hesitating, and said finally, "I don't want to tell you."

"You promised," I objected.

"I know."

"What's the problem?" I said as I stared at her face, searching for an answer.

"I think it will make you mad – or sad," she answered with embarrassment, her blush an incredible shade under the evolving moonlight.

My brows pulled together in worry as I thought. What on earth could have her so concerned that she could not answer my question?

"I still want to know. Please?"

She sighed, and I waited for her answer. "Well...I assumed it was some kind of...occasion. But I didn't think it would be some trite human thing...prom!" she scoffed.

"Human?" I asked flatly. What on earth? And then before I could say anything further, she opened her mouth, effectively silencing me.

"Okay," she confessed in a rush. "So I was hoping that you might have changed your mind...that you were going to change ME, after all."

A dozen emotions invaded me, anger...pain...confusion and from Bella's expression I knew that she sensed what I was feeling. I knew that I had to get a handle on my emotions, so I decided to treat her confession with levity, rather than address it for the serious subject that it was.

"You thought that would be a black tie occasion, did you?" I teased as I touched the lapel of my jacket and grinned.

Bella scowled in response, but her deepening blush showed me her true feelings. "I don't know how these things work. To me, at least, it seems more rational than prom does." I couldn't help but grin further. "It's not funny," she said, those three words bringing me back to reality.

"No, you're right, it's not," I agreed as I felt my smile fade. "I'd rather treat it as a joke, though, than believe you're serious."

"But I am serious," she said. And as misguided as her feelings were, I knew that she was telling me nothing but the truth. Ever since Phoenix, she had not stopped with her line of questioning, constantly asking me why I had not let the venom spread. Realising that it was getting her nowhere, her arguments went from that incident to those of a far more disturbing nature. She would confess that one lifetime was not enough for her to spend with me, her words inviting me to behave in the most deplorable, most selfish manner and change her.

I sighed deeply in response. "I know. And you're really that willing?" I asked as the pain tore through me. Though I knew that she sensed my pain, she just bit her lip and nodded slowly.

"So ready for this to be the end," I murmured to myself, "for this to be the twilight of your life, though your life has barely started. You're ready to give up everything." I knew that no matter what I said now, it mattered not. She had a determined look in her eye, and this saddened me. Why would one such as Bella Swan, with everything in the world to live for, want to sacrifice everything from her life to her soul?

"It's not the end, it's the beginning," she disagreed under her breath. Oh when would she see how wrong she was?

"I'm not worth it," I said sadly.

"Do you remember when you told me that I didn't see myself very clearly?" she asked, raising her eyebrows. "You obviously have the same blindness."

"I know what I am," I said truthfully, and I did not want Bella to become like me, no matter how much my selfish nature desired it.

She sighed in response, our impasse rearing its ugly head once more, causing me to look at her, pursing my lips, my eyes probing the depths of hers. Though I knew it to be a risk, I wanted to hear her say the words, to placate the selfish side of my nature and to see exactly how serious she was.

"You're ready right now, then?" I asked, challenging her to answer truthfully.

"Um." She gulped. "Yes?"

I smiled, knowing that she was no more ready for this than I was in truth, and inclined my head slowly until my cold lips brushed against the skin against the corner of her jaw, her scent calling to me, sending the delicious burn down my throat, a sensation that I knew I would never get my fill of. "Right now," I said as I breathed against her tempting skin, causing her to shiver. Her body then went rigid and her heart raced and her breathing became erratic. Her physical reactions told me in no uncertain terms that she was in fact, not ready.

I chuckled darkly in response and looked at her, a strange feeling of relief combined with disappointment overwhelming me as my heart argued with my mind.

"You can't really believe that I would give in so easily," I said mockingly.

"A girl can dream," she said, causing me to raise my eyebrows in shock.

"Is that what you dream about? Becoming a monster?"

"Not exactly," she said, frowning at me in return. "Mostly I dream about being with you forever," she whispered, and I did not miss the ache, the longing in her voice, for being with Bella forever brought out the exact same feelings within me.

"Bella," I said as I reached up and lightly traced the shape of her beautiful, kissable lips, the ache to touch her too much to bear. "I WILL stay with you – isn't that enough?"

She smiled at me under the touch of my fingertips, her hot sweet breath covering my skin. "Enough for now," she said.

I frowned at her tenacity, realising that neither one of us was going to surrender tonight. I exhaled, letting out a small growl in frustration as I held her closely, wishing more than anything that we could stay like this, here, forever, without the weight of the world upon our shoulders.

Bella reached up and touched my face in return, her eyes filled with so much passion, so much love that it flooded through me as if she had somehow briefly allowed me into her very soul. "I love you more than everything else in the world combined. Isn't that enough?"

"Yes, it is enough," I answered, smiling at my beautiful girl. My Bella. My one reason for existing. My only reason for living. I stared into the depths of those mesmerising chocolate eyes, wanting to lose myself in them for the rest of eternity. "Enough for forever," I murmured as I leaned down and pressed my lips to her warm soft ones, the freesias overwhelming me as I trailed kisses down her glorious throat, our impasse still standing tall between us as I inhaled deeply and lost myself within the love of my existence...

**FIN**

**A/N: Well! That was certainly a cathartic experience! Was it good for you too? If I smoked, I think I'd light one up right now LOL! I would really love for you to show me the love, particularly on this chapter, and especially if you've read the whole story to the end WITHOUT REVIEWING! So before you press the X button and leave, please press the review button and let me know what you think. I'd really appreciate it!**

**ONCE AGAIN, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR ALLOWING ME TO SHARE A LITTLE BIT OF MY SOUL WITH YOU ALL. YOU'RE COMMENTS AND SUPPORT HAVE BEEN SECOND TO NONE!**

**UNTIL NEXT TIME XXXX LISA.**


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